Madonna's "Live To Tell", for patrons. Happy holidays from me & Holly. (Patreon)

Hi Loves.

**edit: it looks like the embed is glitching for some reason. Use the SoundCloud link while we figure out what’s going on!!**

It's ready!

Don't let the truth burn you alive this season.

Listen to the embed above or listen/download it here on soundcloud.....

https://soundcloud.com/amandapalmer/live-to-tell-patron-only/s-6zFL9s8FFDm?si=508612487d9b466eb441a715a431ba9d&utm_source=clipboard&utm_medium=text&utm_campaign=social_sharing

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This one's for patrons only, as a little weird holiday gift.

A dark gift, a light gift, a soul gift, because, of course, I'm me.

It's a beautiful, lush, cover version of "Live to Tell". The song was co-written by her and Patrick Leonard for her third studio album, "True Blue" in 1986. We were torn betweem two versions - one with drums and one without out, I had a SLIGHT preference for the no-drum version - so we are releasing the no-drum version to the general patreon and sendind the with-drum version to the $5 tier in a moment (Michael's idea) -You can get that version here if you wanna hear it.)

I'm feeling pretty introverted given all the hospital time, the crew is all off for the holidays, and this was a last-minute idea.

So...just for you, this little song. Maybe, someday, for the world. There are enough patron-only releases at this point that I practically have a CD box set (but those don't exist anymore).

...........

I'm working on a couple books and book ideas right now (as I've mentioned) and there's a poignant theme running under all the writing: the cost of silence. The price of "we don't discuss that." The cost of silence could mean so many things: the emotional price a kid pays when there's an abusive or sexually violent secret in the family, the financial and familial price a person pays for coming out of the closet, the fact that society is shaped in such a way that silence can be legally purchased.

I want to tell the story of this release in a new way, just so you sort of understand what the interplay of Art and Life are like right now.

This is the song of the season, for me.

So many people I know (myself included) are holding onto secrets that burn.

Information that has nowhere to go.

I am thinking of the confessional project that I did in Tasmania, where over 100 people told me things they couldn't tell anyone else. The many rapes. The many beatings. The many horrific stories.

The many woman who could not leave their husbands, or out their fathers, because they could not disrupt the family.

I am thinking of the woman who came up to me after the show in 2019, who told me that her father raped her, and that I was one of the only people she had ever told.

I am thinking of the secrets we carry that we have no place to put.

I am thinking about what my job is, what my responsibility to my community is, my responsibility to women, to people, to truth, to my son. To myself.  To the burn inside.

.....

Holly Miranda - my close friend in Woodstock and amazing songwriter - and I got the idea to do this about three weeks ago.

Lee had just gotten very sick. I did not know exactly how I would juggle all of this, with all the Christmas stuff to do as well.

I listened, on my phone, to the key possibilities that Holly sent while I was waiting for my luggage to arrive at Logan airport in Boston, Mass. A woman in a camelhair coat looked at my oddly. Here she was, here I was,  this (other) disheveled woman, waiting for bags, in the dry cold air, a grey coat with greying hair, holding a phone up to her ear trying to find the key of her singing voice over the hum and din of the arriving bags. I sang. I couldn't find the key. I couldn't understand the bass notes. I was too tired.

I found the key the next day in the hospital.

He was lying there, looking at me as I stood at the window, listening to Holly sing the song with her guide vocal. He smiled patently. I remember these moments from when Anthony was so sick and my Kickstarter was exploding.

He was so sick, and I still had to work. I still had to keep the lights on. I remember his patience, his frustration with me.

Holly worked on the sounds, I learned the piano chords and worked on the delivery of the lyric.

By Monday, Dec 18th, we were ready to cut the piano and vocal bits.

The piano took a while. Here I am, photos by Holly:

Here's Peter Caigen, me in the distance in the vocal booth, this photo by Holly.

I had two hours, and I had to stop cutting the vocal in the mdidle because I forgot I had a zoom call with a lawyer about the unfolding sitution back in Boston.

I left the vocal booth for the zoom call.

I didn't get to perfect the vocal because I had to pick Ash up from school that day.

I asked Holly, who was sitting in the producer chair, if she thought we had the vocal.

She thought we did.

I left the studio.

I could have asked someone else to pick the kid up. I didn't want to do that.

I had already not seen my kid enough. So: fuck the vocal. It was perfectly imperfect. It was human, pitchy, imperfect, a reflection of this life.

Holly got the files from Pete the engineer. They were scrambled. Holly despaired. I offered to go in and re-record everything. It looked, for a moment, like the project might just fall off a cliff.

Holly rallied and managed to get the track mixed.

Then she got really sick.

We emailed the files over to Jherek to master the tracks.

He had just come down with covid, but he still managed to get the work done.

I approved the final masters sitting in a car in the parking lot of the fucking hospital.

I was on the fence about the drums at the end of the day...so Holly and I sent a text message out to a bunch of our friends. Then we were cuked: the vote was 50/50. Michael came up with the brilliant idea of sending one version to the $5 patrons. Genius. Again, if you wanna hear that, it's HERE for that tier of folks:

https://www.patreon.com/posts/95177462

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I got the idea for the artwork at home...this was taken in the house too much happened.

I took the photo of the hiding, hiding peeking sun with my iphone and made some saturation adjustements. Simple and to the point. Holiday vibes. Dark. Fitting. May we come to light.

And here's the artwork for the drums version....

All told, this release made it out by the grace of goddman god, or whatever else you believe in this time of year.

I love you all so, so much.

I hope you love this track.

enjoy it.

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Holly sent you all some photos and a voice memo from her sick bed...I'll send that as a separate post.

As fate would have it, I JUST found out that Madonna was just playing this song on tour, and created a huge, beautiful tribute to those lost to HIV/AIDS...she flew through the air surrounded by photographs of the dead.

God, I love her. There's some tour footage here. There's Keith Haring, on the right.

I love you, all.

I really do.

Listen to it in the bathtub, with some candles lit.

Listen to it with headphones, in bed.

Listen to it parked in the car, in the freezing cold, parked on level 4 of the hospital parking lot.

THAT is the spot, I think. That's where I broke down weeping.

See if it works for you, too.

Happy holidays.

(Will I....ever have the chance again?)

xxx

AFP

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CREDITS:

Engineered, Mixed & Produced by Holly Miranda. All guitars, synths, extra vocals and misc sounds - Holly Miranda.

Piano and vocal - Amanda Palmer

Vocal and piano engineer - Pete Caigan @ Utopia Studio

Mastered by Jherek Bischoff.

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P.S. Tour is coming. All tickets for solo dates are at https://amandapalmer.net/events/, all dolls dates are at https://dresdendolls.com/.

Dec 28: The Alladin Theater, Portland, OR (SOLD OUT)

Dec 29: The Alladin Theater, Portland, OR (SOLD OUT)

Dec 31: NEW YEARS EVE with THE DRESDEN DOLLS & FRIENDS @ The UC Theatre, Berkeley, CA

Solo:

Jan 21: Sherwood, Queenstown NZ (SOLD OUT)

Jan 24: Q Theatre, Auckland NZ

Jan 27: Old St Pauls, Wellington NZ

Feb 1: City Recital Hall, Sydney NSW

Feb 3: Hamer Hall, Melbourne VIC

Then dolls Again:

March 22&23: Mohawk, Austin TX

March 26&27: The Kessler Theater, Dallas TX

March 29th: The Eastern, Atlanta GA

March 30th: Brooklyn Bowl, Nashville TN