a delicate and very heartfelt question. (Patreon)

good morning loves.

i have a serious question for you. i’m just waking up, about to travel to auckland where i play a sold out show tomorrow. it’s such a strange feeling, knowing that i can do what so few musicians can do right now. i want to talk about that for a moment.

i was talking on zoom with a friend in new york yesterday, who told me, with total love and compassion, that it’s very hard to look at reports from my life in aotearoa new zealand. we are carrying on like normal with hardly any covid as NY deals with interminable lockdown.

i have been blogging, etc, for 20 years & there have always been endless disconnects between What I’m Going Through and What You’re Going Through, but this is a whole new kettle o fish. i’ve never felt this kind of difference. covid has created very strange emotional static here.

there is a “new normal” in the spectrum of responses when i post a photo of humans to social media nowadays. there is an almost-guaranteed exchange on every post:

“OMG UNSAFE why is nobody wearing masks??”

“she’s in new zelaand idiot”

“where is new zealand”

etc, etc.

on the other hand, so many people comment “this is making me so happy, seeing kids running around together and people being so normal, please keep posting these snapshots as a reminder that we will get out of hell one day”.

add to this the weirdness that some people are slowly starting to get grumpy with my here-ness, which manifests in comments in the “easy for you to say/how dare you...” department. i think some of that is due to the fact that people don’t know the backstory of why i am here.

if you missed the backstory about why i am in new zealand: i was touring and was supposed to be here for 10 days in march. covid hit like mad that week. my husband joined me with our four-year-old. a month later my husband left. i knew almost nobody here. i figured out a life.

new zealand locked down very hard for six week or so, right at the start of things. everyone stayed at home and didn’t even leave their neighborhoods. cops stopped cars and asked folks where they were headed. there was no take out. now there is practically no covid. it worked.

for the time being, i have no plans to go home. i’m from new york. i have a little kid. i’m not insane.

i’m also glad to report that it’s looking very promising that neil can get back into the country. we’re really happy about that prospect. it’s been very hard for everyone.

everybody has been hit by the covid-mace with a different nail of suffering. 32 flavors of pain, pick your poison. some are stuck together. some tragically separated. some trapped at home. some can’t get home. the key is to remember that all suffering is suffering. it’s all real.

so here is my heartfelt question, since so many of my readers AREN’T in new zealand, land of little covid, and i’m touring.

what would you most like to see and to hear from me, or from people here?

what would bring comfort?

ease suffering?

think about it and tell me. honestly.

i love you.

xx

afp

(i’m cross-posting versions of this to twitter, IG and FB too.)