from the desk of WE ARE THE MEDIA: meet gabrielle & jack, your foreign tour correspondents (Patreon)

 {patron only}

hallo comrades

greetings from a hotel in STUTTGART. the show here is tomorrow night and i packed my bags in london after ash's epic birthday part yesterday...

there was an alice in wonderland cake with THE ACTUAL BOOK PRINTED ON ACTUAL RICE PAPER THAT YOU COULD EAT.

COME ON.

....and then i did some fucking laundry in london and hauled my old ass here to stuttgart to meet up with my new bestie judith holofernes to plan some patriarchy-smashing and do some podcast recording. speaking of being the media. WE IS IT.

i play tomorrow in stuttgart, then essen the next night, then friday to antwerp. IF YOU'RE IN ANTWERP, HEADS UP. CLIMATE CHANGE MARCH FIRDAY MORNING!!! I AM GOING TO BE THERE!!! i'll send details ASAP, let's all meet up!!!!

i am working on a post from the amazing two days of ninja-ing in vienna and graz....

BUT

right now….i’ve got some fun (and late) news for you.

a new twist, shall we say, on an old concept.

this idea has been brewing from a few different directions, and i should have actually written this post a week or so ago, but for fuck’s sake look at my schedule.

i’ve been one busy biotch. this is one of those legs of tour where there is too much happening for me to report on, and this is always frustrating.

there are 24-hour periods of time where i am literally dealing with 5-7 epic pieces of news (i sold out the vienna koncerthaus! holy shit look at it! i also just did the biggest outdoor ninja gig of my life!

i also a public dirndl-defacing in graz! i also just got profiled in one of the biggest papers in germany! i also desperately need to get the word out about the shows in ireland! DUDE, WHERE DO I START!???)

i try my best. i try not to inundate you. i know i inundate you. i’m a fast, sloppy writer. i usually have hayley backing me up and pulling photos and flash-editing my bogs back in new york, and these last few weeks she’s taking some well-deserved time off for travel and family reasons. my day on tour looks like this:

-wake up, get coffee
-get on the internet
-moar coffee
-read the internet
-moar coffee, eat breakfast
-share things on the internet
-maybe do some press
-deal with 67 guest list requests for the shows coming up
-get back on the internet
-possibly run around like a crazy person doing a ninja gig or a march
-get back not he internet
-do soundcheck
-get back on the internet
-drink wine
-perform my 3-4 hours show
-meet patrons, if possible
-drink wine
-collapse
-wake up, get coffee, etc. 

i am so into coffee.

it is the happiest moment of my life, the good coffee.

here is me in amsterdam the other day, after figuring out where the best coffee was.

it's a thing i do. it's my favorite moment of the day. the coffee. i digress.

other artists, perhaps, spend their days rehearsing, actually getting better at their instruments, or taking long, leisurely-musing walks through the local museums. 

i don’t do this. i be on the internet.

i am still independent. you know that, right?
i have manager, i have booking agents, i have assistants in new york. 

but i don’t get to the city and a have a meeting with the local representatives of my record label. news.

i used to do that.

i remember them, some of them even fondly. dirk in germany. nora in germany. all the UK folks. 

now, instead of meeting with people who may or may not have my artistic best interests in mind, I STILL DO A TON OF SHIT MYSELF.

this is the way i have been running things, more or less, since 2009 when i ripped myself off the label, and, i gotta say, having had it both ways….i still prefer it this way,

with people power.

…………

SO, with all that said....

one of the things that has pained me about the release cycle of this record was a dearth of really in-depth press.

you know, where the new yorker or the atlantic or vice gives you a pulitzer-winning hunter-s-thompson-style reporter and they follow you and your existence and isness around for four months and they report on WHAT IT ALL MEANS, you <the object>, the art <your landscape>, your community, the ZEITGEIST. the WHY OF WHAT. the WHAT OF WHY. 

................

the new yorker returned no phone calls.

what? but. do they not know what is happening over here? the patreon? the gentle dismantling of patriarchy through music? the community that slaughtered the system with love and compassion?

ER WHY NOT

..................

okay. we know our things.

plenty of media outlets out there are struggling to even.....keep the lights on and be able to cover the shit people are already interested in clicking on. KARDASHIANS! TRUMP! that article from the cut about the instagram influencer that everyone is writing about this week!

i get it, i get it. the media is scrambling. nobody knows what to fucking do. nobody knows how to pay journalists anymore for doing hardcore, long-form, non-clickbait articles.

the newspaper i grew up with, the boston globe, doesns't even have an arts section anymore.

they fired all the arts writers.

i am just fucked.

i'm not even famous. nobody is going to ever follow me around, hunter-s-thompson style, reporting on the Geist of our Zeit. who would pay for it?

...................

WAIT.

..................

you can see where i'm going here.

....................

so a few months ago, i decided to hire the smartest, weirdest, most observant and articulate young writer/journalist i know, jack nicholls, to write a report/essay/article on this album, and tour. i told him i'd pay him a lump sum of a few thousands dollars and covet all his travel, food and expenses. (i know jack from australia. his dad was the editor for the encyclopedia of sci-fi and fantasy. i met his parents - clare and peter - through neil, they adopted me in melbourne, took me in, fed me, loved me. jack became family. i was aghast at how good his - unpublished -writing was.)

it was right around the time i made this decision that my new-found photographer friend, gabrielle motola, who i'd ran into on a street in paris, she recognized me because she'd photographed me for reuters many years before...she was living in iceland at the time, just having finished her story/photo book on gender equality in iceland, "an equal difference". https://www.anequaldifference.com/. , which was funded, btw, via kickstarter by over 300 backers. this is my kinda person. she texted me and asked if i wanted a friend-photographer for any of the tour.

oh man i'd fucking love to. but, i said, there's not really a budget for that.

wait a second, i said. i'm getting an idea.

....................

so FUCK IT. fuck you, media, i mean, i love you. but also. fuck you, new yorker, i love you too, but i'm doing this myself, and it's going to work.

i hired gabrielle to come along on the tour too, to be jack's photgrapher, and to capture anything and everything she could from our adventures. it's already.....amazing.

wait until you see the photos she took in graz. 

i'm not sure how this is all going to come together, but it'll either be one or two long thing-articles, and at the very least, we're going to run them here and probably on medium. 

they are going to try, as a team, to do what the outside media is NOT doing.

what will they do?

WILL IT WIN A PULITZER?

and maybe if the new yorker is lucky....

ah, fuck it.

who cares.

......................

this is gabrielle, on the tour bus two days ago:

this is me and jack, dancing like lunatics in graz, wearing dirndls, two days ago:

........................

anyway, you get my point here.

THIS IS WHY WE HAVE THE PATREON.

und,

here's some words from gabrielle and jack, who have now been on the tour, on and off, for about two weeks.

to my extreme glee, they've actually become fast friends (i was hoping that would happen).

here's a photo of jack that gabrielle took in margate:

and here's the two of them on the bus.....

(all photos by gabrielle, obviously)

from gabrielle and jack:

Dear Patrons,

You may have had your photo taken by a short photographer through a short lens. You may have been asked piercing questions by an Australian in a dress. Worry not, you are not living in an espionage nightmare. You have just encountered...the Tour Correspondents.

When the media offers your lemons...make your own media. 

There Will Be No Intermission is going to be the subject of a major feature article, offering a behind the scenes look at life on the road with Amanda Palmer.

My name is Jack Nicholls – I’m an Australian journalist/short story writer/world wanderer with a taste for bananas and protest movements. I write about politics, society, art and the intersection of all three, but most of all I like to write about people. You can find links to some of my pieces at my website http://www.jacknicholls.net/.

Gabrielle Motola is the wisest and bravest of photographers, who is not afraid to start conversations with total strangers. You should follow her on instagram at @gmotophotos and if you like her, join her on her Patreon www.patreon.com/gmotophotos; not just for her tour pictures but her street photography and thoughtful reflections on our world and the people in it. 

Together we’ll be flashing out updates about where Amanda is at. But we’re not just covering a tour, but a cultural moment. We all know that a lot is changing for all of us – the way we relate to each other, the way we produce art, the way we consume the planet. 

Each night, Amanda’s show is taking us into the dark to find some light, and we will follow suit. We are writing about Amanda, about you, and even about us; where we find ourselves at this strange moment in time, and how we are finding ourselves and each other. When it comes out, you on the Patreon will be the first to read it.

In the meantime, if you see us on the tour, feel welcome to come up to us. We want to hear your stories, make a portrait of you and get your perspective. If you're at a loss for topics, tell us what you are afraid of, what you love, and what art means to you. Or simply say hello and we'll go from there. Help us understand this strange and beautiful global community by shining some light on your part in it.

We are looking forward to meeting more of you at the shows to come.

Jack and Gabrielle

.........

there is a part of me that goes 

wait: you cannot be the complete media. 

pay your own journalists?

but that's worse than trump. that's like...an art dictatorship.

it's like 1984.

it's like....

or is it?

i don't know. 

i don't know because i have no idea what jack is actually going to write, and all i know is that i trust him to write something true and real and with feeling.

...............

so it's not me paying a journalist to bow smoke up my own ass.

it's me taking our collective kitty and paying a journalist to write something for us, about us, that will, hopefully, touch us. 

i don't know. all i know is that i know this feels right to me.

the instagram influencer story really did hit a nerve though.

AM I A CAROLINE OR A NATALIE?

WHAT DOES THAT MAKE JACK?

i know the truth.

i know we are all both.

...............................

this is jack, writing backstage in vienna:

and here's the three of us....what a weird posse......outside the venue in graz, post dirndl-defacing at the aufsteirern (more on that soon):

(this photo by chez, our tour manager).

...............

so now you know.

if you see them at any of the upcoming shows, THATS WHO THEY ARE....your FOREIGN TOUR CORRESPONDENTS, paid for by your patron dollars.

love them.

.................

i have no idea how good or weird or long or "important" this is going to be.

i hope to god you don't mind that we're doing this.
i hope you trust us.
it feels important.

let's do this shit.

................

time for bed. see you tomorrow, stuttgart.

xxx

AFP

p.s. you should follow gabrielle on instagram, she's posting a bunch of great tour stuff there. and her mini-stories and portraits there are amazing, insightful, funny, human. and she's also go her own brand-spanking-new patreon. 

------THE NEVER-ENDING AS ALWAYS---------

1. if you’re a patron, please click through to comment on this post. at the very least, if you’ve read it, indicate that by using the heart symbol.

2. see All the Things i've made so far on patreon: http://amandapalmer.net/patreon-things

3. join the official AFP-patron facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/afpland

4. new to my music and TOTALLY OVERWHELMED? TAKE A WALK THROUGH AMANDALANDA….we made a basic list of my greatest hits n stuff (at least up until a few years ago, this desperately needs updating) on this lovely page: http://amandalanda.amandapalmer.net/

5. general AFP/patreon-related questions? ask away, someone will answer: patronhelp@amandapalmer.net