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Dealing with ADHD and Impulsivity (Patreon)

Published:
2022-11-15 19:44:49
Imported:
2023-02

Content

Being impulsive is something everyone can understand, but those of us with ADHD can have our impulsivity out of our control. So what can we do to help us in dealing with our ADHD and impulsivity?

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Comments

Kristian OM

Ough, that feeling of not being having a choice and still having to deal with the consequences... Yeah that hit deep. My therapist told me in one of our first sessions that "we can learn to feel comfortable with feeling uncomfortable". It's honestly the only way I've learned today not to blurt out random thoughts or prevent me from acting on "fun ideas" by making peace with how frustrating it feels in the moment.

Anonymous

This has also been one of the greatest hurdles for me. Going into social situations with a game plan is definitely a good idea, but even still, I often find my best laid plans laid to waste and impulsivity strikes again! The really crazy thing is I don’t so much pause in the moment as go into a weird out of body experience: my mouth keeps talking and saying whatever obnoxiously impulsive thing is going to say while my brain is screaming, “Everyone in the room is going to feel a lot better if you don’t say that out loud!” In recent years, I have gotten better at listening for that scream from my brain and recognizing that’s a signal from the more sensible part of my personality - maybe instead of belting out, I could simply listen.

Anonymous

my biggest impulsivity problems are shopping (adhd tax) and new ideas (for solving problems or creating something). does anyone have any suggestions for how to slow down or make a plan ahead of time for those categories? This time of year is especially bad and I'm feeling so much guilt and shame. (Thank you Jessica + team for this video - it was so very needed and helpful!)

How to ADHD
>>95700391

Ohhh yes! I love that one. And that "uncomfortable" and "unsafe" are not the same thing. So it's important to note "do I feel uncomfortable or do I actually feel unsafe?". And when I just feel uncomfortable I practice sitting in the uncomfy. It's tough to do especially when I want to spout off impulsively but... it's honestly helped to be able to stay calmer when I am uncomfortable. Mindfulness practice helps me fill in the gaps but I also, unfortunately, have some survival mechanisms from childhood trauma that also taught me how to pause... very very anxiously. 😬 Anyway, I went off on a brief tangent there for a second! 😅 It's great you found a method that can help in some fashion! Kudos! Because I know hard work goes into not just finding out a method but practising it too <3 - Harley, Community Manager 🐻

How to ADHD
>>95705585

This is so incredibly relatable! It's great you've gotten better at listening for that scream tho! That's awesome! - Harley, Community Manager

How to ADHD
>>95731273

Ohhhh yes, shopping can get to me too if I'm not careful. With shopping, I personally try to know my budget for a shopping trip ahead of time... and I try to go a little cheaper on the budget so if I do go over... I'm still generally ok, because if I go about $50 over I start getting anxious... so I build that barrier into my budget. And in one of our recent videos -- the Staples Haul one, I believe -- Jessica did a really cool thing where she pulled off to the side... and double-checked her items and really thought through if she would actually use it or needed it. As sometimes she picked up things because they looked cool but in reality, she'd probably not use them. I know some others have done the thing where they'll sleep on it for a couple of days and if they still REALLY want something, they'll buy it. Some even go a week or so, though I personally could never do that. But it does work for some people! 😊 Haven't figured out how to slow down new ideas by myself, yet. My husband actually helps and acts as a barrier. He'll ask me various questions to make sure I semi-think through what I'm planning to make sure I actually want to do it... and have thought about the different things that could be impacted. So having someone to run the idea by can potentially be helpful... you'd just have to get used to remembering to talk it out with them first... which... would require a pause. 😅 Impulse is complicated... Anyway I hope some of this helps or gives you ideas of where to start! - Harley, Community Manager

Kristian OM
>>95700391

Oooh, the difference between comfy and safety is such a good point. Never thought about that! On a tangential note: I had starte getting these waves of feeling anxious and when I stopped to sit with the feeling, I couldn't figure out where it was coming from. Turns out I had just switched to a new coffee bean, which apparently didn't mix well with Elvanse 😂

Anonymous

I found this really interesting thank you