Elvira's Invitation (Patreon)

Elvira was happy to be alone. Sure, she didn’t exactly have the place to herself, but she had a place to have to herself, at least. While the Manor Macabre was being fumigated (which obviously was taking forever) she’d been couch-surfing. Vampira had kicked her out… new boyfriend… and Bettie wouldn’t let her slink into bed with her… too frustrating… but then she’d thought of it! The House of Mystery! That joint always had a bed for her! Sometimes more than one, if she applied herself.

Of course, there were current residents. You had to expect that with prime real estate. She would’ve thought it’d be someone like the Cryptkeeper, someone moving up in the world, but it was yuppies. And worse, superheroes. Zatanna, Blue Demon, Ragman… she didn’t know them all. They called themselves Justice League Dark, which Elvira didn’t get, because they didn’t even have Black Lightning on the team.

Well, she’d promised and wheedled and finally convinced them all that in an oversized living genius loci, there was a room for a horror hostess who was small in everything but cup size. Now she had a bed, she had a seat, and she had a minty fresh mouth: she just needed someone to fill those things with.

As soon as she was alone, Elvira slipped out of her dress and into her nightgown—she usually didn’t go for white, but the House of Mystery just seemed like the kind of place that called for a long gauzy nightie and carrying a candelabra around instead of her lit-up phone.

She helped herself to one of the house’s free-range bats for dinner, then went into the bathroom and started filling the tub. While she waited for the water to rise, she poured in a strong helping of bubble bath, then helped herself to a strong pour of wine.

Finally, she took off her nightie and looked over her body. The best part about not having roommates—and Elvira felt that having a whole wing of the house to herself counted—was that she had space to really enjoy being naked. After all, everyone else enjoyed her naked body; why shouldn’t she?

Was it too much to ask to look herself over in privacy? And maybe feel anything that looked particularly interesting? So many people had told her to get a hold of herself over the years, but they were surprisingly mean when she went through with it. Okay, so she was a bit vocal when her self-exploration proved rewarding. So what? Vampira could have her parents over any time; how often did Victoria’s Secret do a show without any fatties in it?

While the scalding hot water cooled and steam swirled in the air, she took a hand mirror and stood before the bathroom door, where a full-length mirror showed her all of her body. It was beautiful. She faced the mirror straight, sideways, with her back to it and looking over her shoulder to admire the full plump circumference of her taut ass. From all sides Elvira admired the subtle tapering of her wasp-waist, her firm and all-but-oversized breasts with the swollen nipples long and pointed.

Elvira ran a finger teasingly down her silky stomach and played it over the deep, dimpled chalice of her belly button. Touching it, she remembered a guy who’d been working his way to going down on her, tracing the little flexes of her stomach with kiss after kiss, like he was building up to sucking her cunt into the usual spasms of ecstatic enjoyment.

But this time, he’d gone at her navel instead, tonguing it like it was her pussy and he was giving it the usual fucking. He mouthed her belly button so passionately that before she knew what was happening, she was coming all over herself, and him.

Elvira giggled to herself. Not every guy could give a girl a navel orgasm. She really should’ve gotten his number…

Pridefully, Elvira ran her hands over the lush swell of her hips, down to her firm if well-rounded thighs, and dug her fingers into the ripe resilience of the flesh. Not as toned as she’d like it to be, but the skin was pale as porcelain and gave little twinges of pleasure, the nerves all faithfully responding to her self-stimulating touch.

Elvira planted her feet wide apart, bent her knees a little, and lowered the hand mirror between her open thighs. On one side, the mirror showed the same as the one on the bathroom door, but on the flipside, it was like a magnifying glass.

Biting her lip in enthralled delight, Elvira stared at the huge pink-lipped cleft of her own womanhood. The folds of her sex were dewy and pink, only just beginning to blossom with arousal and show tantalizing hints of the tightness a man might expect to find inside her. The small bud of her clit was still halfway inside its covering hood, but she still felt the buzz of nerves there, all scintillating anticipation.

Elvira brought one finger to her slot. It became gigantic in the hand mirror’s reflection and Elvira’s breath caught at the thought of such a large intruder inside herself. Now she really was wondering why Justice League Dark didn’t have any black guys…

Slowly her finger went between the lips of her sex, parting them more than they already were. She slid the digit home until the last knuckle was in her sensitive channel, feeling it and being felt.

Her knees shook. She bent her finger, stroking the inside of her cunt, and gasped. It felt good! Elvira added her thumb to the mix, rubbing it against her clit to make the nubbin swell and throb. It felt so good to be getting fucked and to be watching it, especially with the hand mirror turning it all into an IMAX show, like she was watching Giganta get fucked by Master Hand.

Now there’d be a good addition to the team; Giganta. Still not black, but if you stood in her shade, who could tell? It wasn’t like Huntress was black either, but she’d still gotten a seat on the real Justice League. Why? Because they needed to replace Green Arrow with an archer who’d taken a workplace boundaries seminar once in their life?

Actually, that might be it.

Anyway, it was a hell of a show, but Elvira got to feel it, not just watch. It felt so good that pretty soon she shut her eyes, keening softly, but she couldn’t luxuriate in the sensation for long without opening her eyes and getting another good look.

Her pussy was all juicy, a vivid pink that was almost out of place on her alabaster body, like the glowing bit on a video game boss you shot to send it to high score heaven. It was also nice and open—she put two fingers into it easily. But her other hand was shaking, buffeted by her fast-panting breath, until she could hardly hold the hand mirror still.

Quickly she set it down on the floor and all but straddled it, playing at her flowing cunt with both hands now, shuddering uncontrollably, seeing her glazed eyes and stony nipples in the door mirror.

“Oh sweet Satan, I’m going to do it! Annhh! I’m gonna do it! Nngh! I’m doing it—”

Then, all of a sudden, she was in the tub, with nary a splash to mark her teleportation. And the water was cold. Almost freezing.

“HHHH! What was that?” Elvira demanded of the House, now rubbing herself just to get some warmth into her body. She pulled the drainplug. “Is this your way of telling me not to waste water? Because I was going to use that water! I heard a storm warning, okay? You’re supposed to have water for boiling in case the pipes—oh, what’s the use? I can’t believe you’d do this to me. And after I went inside you, too! You know how grateful Constantine would be if I put a fist inside him? And I used my whole body!”

The water finished draining down the pipe, but the noise kept up. A low, vibrating growl. Elvira looked around in surprise—then looked down.

Between her legs, Etrigan’s fingers curled on the lip of the porcelain. His huge, horny head lofted over the end of the tub, dropping toward the apex of her open legs and taking a huge whiff, then looking up the rest of her nudity with pure, Seven Deadly Sins LUST in his big blazing eyes.

Elvira looked back at him, face blanked with surprise at the stealthy approach of the grotesque gargoyle… which slowly turned to a look of shameless lust as Etrigan came to his feet. Not his full height, for the demon still stooped over like an overmuscled pitbull, but tall enough for his phallus to be seen over the side of the tub Elvira laid in.