Herding Cats update (Patreon)

Caroline’s jaw dropped with a gleeful amount of shock. “He came in your mouth? When was this?”

“Nuh-uh, you first, Ms. Fourth Base! Did it hurt? Did you like that it hurt? Is that why you like annoying me so much, because you’re some kind of sadist who thinks I’m getting off on it?”

Caroline frowned a little, not at the memory, but at the fact that she was telling it to Max. And not that she minded telling Max, but dishing with her girlfriend meant it was over, and for such a long time it had seemed like that seduction would go on and on.

It stung to consider it a memory.

“It hurt some at first. In fact, it hurt like when he… he’s just so big and I wasn’t really ready, I didn’t let myself get ready, even though I wanted to, because I never really make up my mind that I want to until he’s gone into me and I remember how good it feels because I can’t forget because he’s inside me. But then it felt a lot better… then it felt great!”

“Sounds like you lost your virginity,” Max said, then her eyes grew wide. “Did you lose your virginity?”

Caroline shook her head. “But… I can’t say I knew what it felt like before. My first boyfriend was really gentle—I didn’t even know it could hurt like that. Or how good it could feel, after I got used to the pain and being so full and those… those things Brad said to me…”

Max could only sit there and shake her head in awe. She remembered what Brad had said to her.

Imagine sweet little Caroline Channing getting fed some hardcore dirty talk. It was enough to make her wish Caroline would make a sex tape, though she felt like she’d have an easier time convincing Caroline to make a Brad Sandwich with her. They had always loved cooking together and Caroline had such a major case of stage fright…

“How about you?” Caroline asked, intrigued to the point that it was hard for Max to believe she wasn’t turned on, or even high. Though she knew Caroline was way too lame for any drug above Children’s Tylenol (“I have a low threshold for hallucinogens,” Caroline explained as to why she could get loopy after passing through a cloud of bong vapor.)

“What about me?” Max replied.

“Max, come on, we both got nailed by the same guy… it’s embarrassing, but the least we can do is compare notes.”

“Embarrassing for you, maybe,” Max smirked. “I think I’m punching above my weight class and you’re punching down.”

Caroline’s face turned stricken. “Oh my God, did you punch him? Max, abuse is not okay just because you’re a girl—“

“I mean you’re slumming it up. And slutting it up. You know when I post that someone on Instagram is literally me?”

“Like you did with that girl in the Thor movies?”

“Yeah, well, you’re literally me right now. How’s the slut life treating you, slutty?”

“Let’s not get off-topic,” Caroline said primly, though with a sly smile that bespoke satisfaction with the slut life. “Because you’re starting to sound like you’re the virgin—trying to hide that all you did was get to second base.”

“No!” Max whooped. “I’m not even a backdoor virgin. And if I was, I wouldn’t have been after Brad was done with me.”

Caroline jerked her head up at that. Max knew it was wrong and bad to lie to her friend about how much dick she’d gotten—total breach of the girl code—but she couldn’t live down getting less action than Caroline Channing.

“I mean, you saw the afterparty,” Max continued. “I swear, Brad must’ve just finished with you when we locked eyes and he knew I was down. He backed me up against a wall and shoved it right in. I think it was still wet—thanks, by the way, I definitely needed the help to take it all. It was unbelievable. He was soooo fucking good to me.”

Max sat there silently a moment, trying to convey the satisfaction she hadn’t really gotten—enjoying her time with Brad, but missing out on all the hot-girl shit that somehow Caroline Channing had gotten to indulge in.

Caroline sported the genuine article of the sex-goofy grin Max was trying to fake. She definitely hadn’t forgotten the beauty of whatever Brad had done to her.

“Then what happened?” Caroline asked, breaking their reveries. “After he fucked you standing up with all his upper-body strength?”

Max didn’t like the way Caroline emphasized upper-body strength in that sentence. It wasn’t like she was thick; she was thicc.

Anyway, it was time for a bit of half-truth to sell this scam, as all of Max’s eBay interactions told her. “What do you think? He made me kneel down in front of him…” Caroline’s jaw was on the floor. “And clean him off,” Max finished.

Caroline was stunned—wondering if Brad had wanted her to do that at the end and she’d missed out… disappointed him… by being too fuck-drunk to let him get in a mouth-cocking. Not that Max had that problem.

“How… was it?” Caroline asked.

“Mmmmm,” Max sighed, licking her lips and smiling.

She sat back in her chair, pillowing her hands behind her head. In that pose, her breasts jutted out, swelling out the front of her costume and even jerking the zipper down an inch or two.

Caroline felt her mouth start to water. She’d always wondered about Max… not knowing if she was exactly attracted to her, but just knowing that she’d never be convinced that the best sex was with men if she’d never tried it with a woman.

And Max was just so viviacious, so earthy and open, that when Caroline thought of a woman, Max sprung to mind. Even taking up space in her fantasies. Caroline had a taboo against imagining herself doing the kind of things she’d… heh… actually done with Brad, but picturing Max doing them seemed far more natural. Hell, there’d be plenty of times when she’d taken a guy home and Caroline could hear them. Did hear them.

She looked longingly at Max’s engorged breasts, outlining in her imagination the beautiful nipples she knew were concealed along with so much of those succulent breasts. She dreamed of combining her two lovers; of Brad doing to Max what he had done to her.

And Max stared at Caroline, smiling and arching her back some more, accentuating the sheer size of her barely hidden breasts. She felt like she could slip into Caroline’s mind and see exactly what she was thinking.

It wasn’t that she was dissatisfied with men—just that she wanted to try out women. And Caroline in particular. And she loved being with Caroline and screwing with Caroline and touching Caroline… how could Max not want to find out what it’d be like to fuck Caroline?

“Caroline?” Max asked, her heart beating faster as she broached the subject—even as she told herself it was totally ordinary, she was just making a pass at someone, no big deal.

“Yeah?”

“I, uh… I was hoping you, ah… you got all the details from Brad…”

“Details?”

Max felt like she came a little at the softly whispered word. The tension was just so exquisite that any little thing Caroline did or said—even the way she looked—seemed enough to set Max off. “About the deal… the deal he made with you. He didn’t discuss anything with me, so I hope you have… all the information. Because I wanna know, too… what the deal is…”

“The deal?” Caroline looked into Max’s jeweled blue eyes—her own soft baby blues gleaming with a hidden need.

The cab came to a stop just when they were at their most vulnerable, their most intimate. Caroline opened her door and reached out her other hand; Max took it and was practically dragged out on Caroline’s side of the taxi.

She tightly clutched Caroline’s hand as the blonde paid the cabbie, then they walked hand in hand to their building. Wiggling their asses as if for the benefit of their driver, who watched them go, not even thinking of driving away before he’d seen the last of them.

Inside, Caroline started dancing. Just dancing, each step throwing off all it could of her lengthy dress and showing off her lean legs, her lissome body.

Max couldn’t believe what she was seeing. Not only was her bestie dancing, for no reason, to no music, but she was good. Russian ballerina good. Black Swan good. Whatever steps she was moving through, she knew just when to jette and when to pile.

“What are you doing?” Max asked.

“Being happy!” Caroline replied.

“Yeah, I’m happy, you don’t see me being the Swan Queen too.” Of course Caroline was a ballerina. She’d probably personally had the Met Opera playing at her rehearsal.

Max, Max had been into kung-fu, not that her parents had been able to afford the class at the YMCA.

“You should!” Caroline enthused to her, throwing herself into a series of undulations that made Max wonder if she’d ridden Brad with those stomach muscles. “I bet you’re a great dancer!”

“Why bother? There’s no way I could pull off the pink tutu. You’d look great in it, though.”

“It’s not like we’re on stage! It’s just for fun!”

“I bet it’s fun when you’ve seen Swan Lake eight million times. Me, I just know this…” She did whatever it was called when she stood on one leg, the arch of her other leg planted against her calf, and one arm flung up over her head like a half-moon. “So I’ll just hold this pose, okay, and you keep… pirouetting.”

Actually, now that Max thought about it, it might’ve been a yoga thing.

“This isn’t pirouetting,” Caroline explained patiently, mincing over to Max on her tip-toes. “And you’re too tight.”

“Never been accused of that one before,” Max quipped.

“You should be loose—don’t,” Caroline warned Max before she could make another smutty joke. “But your belly is all taut and tense…”

“Knew I shoulda eaten more hot dogs this week.”

“And your shoulders are set too high and your legs are just so stiff. How can the music move you if you’re not loose?”

“With a phat beat and a hook that goes hard,” Max deadpanned.