Lewd Dungeon, Book 12 prologue (Patreon)

Prologue – Trade Chat

(Adventurer’s Guild Official Forums, Miami Branch)

SunnyBunz, MightyMouse, ImAPally, DontYouWantMe, AsaAkiraIsBae, BestGirl, LatinHeat, Salty, Backpage, Craig34, l33tpally, Anonymous3, Anonymous4, RedFox, Kimiko, DonnyJuan, Crusader, BadCompany, HurricaneGal, Scholar, Righteous, Id10t, Satyr, DarkEnchanter, ScoopGirl, VenusFlyTramp, MagicMike, TsundereHealer, Max, LightningLegacy, SwiftTaylor, Domino, Bacchus, Aegis, Temptation, and Lord_Kickass are in the chat.

Kimiko: Anyone want to team up for the monthly Vurlock culling? The fishy bastards have been pushing closer to land as their numbers recover.

Max: Sorry, I signed on with the next convoy to escort them through the Boca Goblin Zone. There have been a few more hobgoblins and shamans reported, so we got to cut their numbers down, too.

BadCompany: Sure, I just got a set of that underwater armor people have been going on about, so I’m willing to go with you.

Domino: Hey, did anyone see the commotion over at the Guild HQ?

BestGirl: What happened?

Bacchus: Forget that, something’s going on at the Dungeon!

BestGirl: What happened?

Crusader: The Dungeon isn’t letting anyone into the dungeon right now. The portals are completely shut down.

Id10t: What? Damn, who went and pissed the Demon off? Was it you, Crusader?

Crusader: I didn’t do anything! I’m not setting foot in that place ever again, if I can help it.

Temptation: Aw, but I had so much fun last time you came to visit.

SwiftTaylor: Why can’t you just be a decent person for once and die horribly in a fire?

Salty: Yowch. I thought MY name was ‘salty’!

Temptation: Oh, don’t mind him, he and Crusader’s other boy-toys are just upset about how badly they got manhandled because they followed her in attempting to destroy me, and refused to sign the contract. So they ended up having a far, far worse contract to sign, that will be punishing them for the next couple years, even if they don’t step into my dungeon.

ScoopGirl: What did you do to them?

Temptation: Oh, after humiliating them for a while, and having all sorts of fun things happen to them in the swamp, I made her sign a contract that requires her to have a child with each of her three harem boys within four years or she, her boys, and any children that have been born so far, become my slaves.

Anonymous3: That is fucking sick.

Temptation: Well, I could have just killed them, but how would they be able to spread the word that trying to destroy me is a horrible idea if they’re dead?

Id10t: Wouldn’t them being dead be a fairly good indicator of that being a poor life plan?

Temptation: Yes, but not as effective as one. See, this way, you can all go to them, and they can tell you how much more horrible their experiences were than the normal dungeon runs, and you can see Crusader’s belly swell in that little chapel she helps run in Swamptown, and ask her all sorts of questions about it.

ScoopGirl: Oh. Oh my.

Righteous: Yeah, enough about that. What is up with the dungeon closing down?

Temptation: Oh, the soldiers are still moving through the dungeon, but, based on what I’ve seen, I’m thinking that I’ll be making a separate course for those carrying guns. So, I’m not letting anyone in until they either clear out or die, and I can make some alterations.

RangerMiguel has entered the chat.

Ambassador has entered the chat.

Domino: Yeah, that’s great and all, but for those of us who don’t use guns, what is up with the Guild HQ? There’s a ton of security around the place and some fancy limos with State Department tags!

RangerMiguel: That would be because we have guests.

Id10t: Woah, the Guildmaster himself? You never hang out in these chats!

Salty: Yeah, you’re usually either elbow deep in work or out in the field, trying to make sure we don’t outlevel you too badly!

ScoopGirl: Oh, Guildmaster! It has been a while. How have you been?

RangerMiguel: Can’t complain, Senorita Sandiego. But yes, the extra security around the guild is for the guests we’re currently entertaining.

Righteous: Is it a secret, or can you tell us who is visiting?

Ambassador: It is not a secret, though it is slightly informal. I am Ambassador Prime Nyca Zygrash of the Fimaazro people.

LatinHeat: Oh, shit, you mean the cute catgirl alien ambassador is here in Miami? Awesome!

MightyMouse: What brings you to Miami, Ambassador? Doesn’t seem like a great place for diplomatic talks, since all the big names are up in DC, or New York.

Ambassador: Well, it actually has to do with one of the research projects I like to indulge myself in during my leisure time.

Scholar: Oh? What kind of research?

Ambassador: I study dungeons, especially aberrant dungeons that do not behave as they are supposed to.

Scholar: Really? Would you mind comparing notes sometime? I only have observations of the one in Swamptown, but I would love to know more.

Ambassador: Don’t be ashamed, Scholar. Every researcher who studies dungeons starts with the one closest them, and then moves on to others as they are better able to travel. I most certainly wish to compare notes with you, since you are the only researcher who has studied the dungeon up close, according to the Guildmaster.

Scholar: Excellent! I’ll get my research materials and head over to the guild hall immediately!

Scholar has left the chat.

ScoopGirl: So, other than teasing your arrival in Miami to the Guild chat room, what brings you to our digital conservatory, Ambassador?

Ambassador: Well, the Guildmaster told me that the Demon of the Dungeon actively participates in these chats, yes? Such a thing is practically unheard of in dungeon lore, especially in a dungeon so young as any of the ones on this planet would have to be.

Temptation: Really? That is very interesting indeed. But, as others can confirm, I am the Demon of the Dungeon. If you were going to try diving the dungeon, I’d have to say that, with your technology, you would probably wipe out all my defenders without trouble.

Ambassador: Ah, actual fights aren’t really what I had in mind. I wanted to study your energy pathways, and perhaps get a look at the dungeon’s core to see if there was anything that might have caused it to develop in the unusual way that it has. Even when there’s an intelligent ‘boss’ for the dungeon, for something like this to happen in a dungeon so young is just…

Temptation: Hmm. Very well. The Guildmaster knows how to contact me offline. I may be open to a meeting.

ScoopGirl: Can I?

Temptation: Fine, fine. You and your camerawoman can come along too. Same rules as last time, though.

MightyMouse: No, I can’t see anything possibly going wrong with this scenario, AT ALL! </sarcasm>