Lewd Dungeon Book IV Prologue (Patreon)

I'll leave the Book 3 stuff up for a couple more days before pulling it so Amazon doesn't yell at me when I submit it. But for now, here's the start of book 4!  

Book IV – Slimes And Goblins

Prologue – Trade Chat

(Adventurer’s Guild Official Forums, Miami Branch)

SunnyBunz, MightyMouse, ImAPally, DontYouWantMe, AsaAkiraIsBae, BestGirl, LatinHeat, Salty, Backpage, Craig34, l33tpally, Anonymous3, Anonymous4, Kimiko, DonnyJuan, Crusader, BadCompany, HurricaneGal, Scholar, Righteous, Id10t, Satyr, DarkEnchanter, Max, LightningLegacy, SwiftTaylor, Domino, Bacchus, Aegis, Temptation, and Lord_Kickass are in the chat.

Aegis: Oh god, am I glad that’s over.

Id10t: What, rough day, Aegis?

Aegis: Goblin Shamans are a PITA.

ImAPally: PITA?

Salty: Pain In The Ass.

SunnyBunz: That sucks, Aegis. Doing the Subjugation and Capture quests from the military, then?

Aegis: Yeah. Unfortunately, all you bastards have been taking the easy ones near the edge, so my group had to go further into the goblin area. Fuckers get stronger closer you get to Boca Raton. And there’s more of them.

DarkEnchanter: How close to the center did you get?

Aegis: About one, maybe two miles? Hard to say exactly, because phone coverage is out there, and we couldn’t afford a Magic Map.

Satyr: What was the strongest monster you saw in the zone?

Aegis: Didn’t get close enough to ID it, but there was this big fucker. Orange-skinned, not green like the goblins, and had to be about as tall as I am, and I’m six foot two.

Scholar: They’re evolving.

Max: What do you mean?

Scholar: I’ve been doing research with some of the information you can get through the System. I think what you saw was a Hobgoblin. They’re an evolved form of goblins. Bigger, stronger, still stupid, but can make a trap. And gear they have will be a size that you can use it easily.

Salty: Once you get the smell out. If they smell anything like goblins, that’ll be horrible.

Kimiko: Scholar, what happens if you break a dungeon core?

Scholar: If you’re lucky? Boom, right in your face. But I’ve been checking with people, and it seems a ley line runs not far from Boca, where the infestation was supposed to have started.

BestGirl: You mean that Boca should have been a dungeon?

LatinHeat: Fuck, the core is just a tiny crystal thing, right? Could have been broken by accident.

Scholar: And then you get Boca, yeah. But if someone could find the broken crystal and move it…

Aegis: We might get Boca back?

Scholar: Or at least make it safe enough to travel without a convoy.

Craig34: Oh shit.

Backpage: What is it?

Craig34: I overheard a group of out-of-towners from up in Savannah talking about how they were going to try and take on the demon of the dungeon.

Domino: Take on, as in boss fight, or take on, as in…

Craig34: Destroy. Yeah, they were talking about finding a way to kill the demon, and get it out of the dungeon.

AsaAkiraIsBae: Why would they want to do that? The guy isn’t exactly hurting anyone that doesn’t ask for it by going into a dungeon.

Craig34: It was a Paladin and her friends. All serious about purging evil and all that.

LatinHeat: But I know a couple priests who have been out to the Dungeon, and they’ve been using their new skills to search for demonic corruption, and haven’t found any.

Craig34: They were complaining that the demon was getting smart.

Scholar: Shit. Those people are going to get us all killed!

Backpage: Fuck, a whole bunch of slimes and plant monsters, spawning in the Everglades? That’ll overrun the whole area in no time. We’d have to burn the fucking swamp down.

Domino: But didn’t the dungeon put that contract in recently?

Scholar: Yeah, you sign, you get to use the escape routes, but you don’t, and the only way out is to defeat the dungeon completely, and everything’s supposed to be more difficult.

Craig34: They didn’t sign the contract.

AsaAkiraIsBae: Well, hopefully the dungeon kills them, then, or they get some sense and don’t go blowing the thing up.

Scholar: Since when did religious zealots have sense?

Righteous: HEY!

DonnyJuan: He’s not wrong, though.

Anonymous3: I got a friend on the military base. I’ll let them know about this, and they can report up the chain.

Max: I’m in the guild office right now, so I’ll let people know.

Backpage: Hopefully we can get out in front of this if they do break the dungeon. Otherwise, Miami is fucked like a passed out cheerleader at a frat party.

BestGirl: ONE TIME! It was just that one time, and people always bring it up! AARGH!

BestGirl has left the chat.

Backpage: Well, now I feel bad about making that joke.

SunnyBunz: You really ought to, it was a crap joke.

VenusFlyTramp has entered the chat.

MagicMike has entered the chat.

TsundereHealer has entered the chat.

VenusFlyTramp: Guys, don’t want to be alarmist or anything, but we just got back in cell range, and there’s some funky stuff going on in the swamp. The Lizardfolk are getting wiped out.

Max: That’s good, right?

MagicMike: No, because SOMETHING is wiping them out, and they’re driving south, towards the dungeon.

Bacchus: Well, that isn’t too bad, since we were going to try and get the Lizardfolk into the dungeon anyways. But what is driving them?

TsundereHealer: Undead. Someone summoned a Necropolis.

Scholar: Wait, what? How? WHY?

MagicMike: They bought a ‘used spellbook’ from a System Shop. Literally, the item was named ‘Eerie-looking Spellbook’. And the dumbass thought it would be a great idea to see what the spells did for real.

VenusFlyTramp: We just barely escaped the area. The undead are basically claiming the area east of Everglades City, where their weird Aztech-looking pyramid rose out of the ground.

Scholar: Did this guy learn nothing from any horror movie EVER? If there’s a creepy looking book, you make sure it is safe before you start reading. And you don’t read aloud. And whatever you do, you don’t fucking cast spells from it until you’re sure what they do!

TsundereHealer: Well, he is some kind of undead now, so he probably won’t be learning anything any time soon.

DontYouWantMe: If it is any consolation, I’ve been hearing that things are actually much worse in some parts of the world.

Scholar: It isn’t. It really isn’t.