Hopscotch (1980, Ronald Neame) (Patreon)

54/100

Can't recall experiencing this particular frustration before, though there must be other examples—perhaps even a few that I like. My standard bugaboo is the protagonist as helpless punching bag; here we have the polar opposite, with disgruntled ex-spook Miles Kendig so infallible that his elaborate, methodical revenge plot gradually becomes a bit of a bore. Matthau's always fun to watch, but he's basically playing a hyper-competent Osbourne Cox (right down to writing his memoirs), which is neither funny nor suspenseful nor much of anything else. You're just waiting to see how each phase of his plan will make poor Ned Beatty sweat and bellow some more. Only once, toward the very end, does Kendig encounter an unexpected hitch, and the scene in which he has to improvise an escape from a London police station, as bobbies note his remarkable resemblance to their latest WANTED teletype, is the film's best, if only because it provides the fleeting possibility of failure (or at least a momentary setback). That's it, though. Otherwise it's like watching a feature-length Roadrunner cartoon from the bird's perspective rather than from Wile E.'s. Is there a beloved Hollywood movie along those lines? Even franchise heroes who invariably triumph—James Bond, Indiana Jones, etc.—genuinely appear to be in jeopardy now and then, even as we know they're quite safe.