A Pile of Shame (Patreon)

I carefully lined up my shot, my crosshairs were just about locked onto the sniper who had been causing so many problems for the squad. This, I thought, was going to save the day.

Mac was on my headset, speaking in a hushed tone - probably sensing that I was lining up a good shot: “Can you take him out? We can’t get past the barricades if we can’t take this guy down.”

“Almost got him,” I said carefully, waiting for the right moment to take my shot. “I just need to…”

My focus, and the world around me, suddenly shattered as a new voice entered the fray.

“Andy! When was the last time you emptied out your diaper pail?”

I dropped my game controller and threw off my headset, hoping that nobody heard what was just said over my microphone. I looked over to Megan, standing over my shoulder with her arms crossed.

“H-hey...let me just quit this game real quick and I can…” But as I glanced back to the TV screen, I saw that I had been killed, and our squad was getting slaughtered in whatever firefight had ensued during my failure to act.

“I’ll ask one more time,” she said. “When was the last time you emptied your diaper pail?”

I had to think, which wasn’t a good sign that it had been recently. It definitely wasn’t before the weekend, and that was three days ago. I debated lying, but that would open up a new can of worms. Either I was just irresponsible, or I was creating the narrative that I was using more diapers than usual in a short time.

“It’s been...a few days…” I confessed.

“Come with me,” she said. She pivoted and left the room, heading down the hall towards the “nursery,” a term I hated, though I knew better than to call the spare room anything else.

I already knew what she wanted to show me, and it was confirmed when I arrived at the door. The stale smell of dirty diapers wafted from the room - a shameful mix of dampness, baby powder and hints of the foul deeds that had taken place in the diapers before they were changed.

“Does this make you happy?” she asked, hands on her hips now.

“No, of course not,” I said. I felt like I was being honest in that I knew the old diapers should’ve been thrown out already, and it didn’t make me happy to have been called out on it. But...I’d have been lying if I said that I didn’t like the foul stench of my recent “accidents.”

“This is revolting,” she said. “Disgusting. Is it not enough you waddle around the house in your dirty diapers, stinking up whatever room you’re in? You just have to leave a bin full of your smelly diapers to stew and make our home smell worse?”

“I...well…” I was finding it hard to respond. Not only did I not have a great argument, but her taunting was having, probably, the opposite effect on me that she intended. I could feel myself growing inside my current diaper.

“Get these things out of the house. And then get back here so I can spank some sense into you.”

I nodded and walked past her to get to the trash can, but my eyes must have caught hers at just the right angle, and she suddenly reached to my crouch, grasping the front of my diaper through my shorts. I wondered what had given it away.

“Well isn’t that just pathetic,” she said, retracting her hand. “It looks like you’re rather fond of your smelly disgusting work in here.”

I offered a sheepish shrug, but there was little else I could do or say. She had been right on the money about everything so far.

I took a step forward to fetch the bag of bin of diapers so I could bring them outside, but her hand appeared in front of my chest, stopping me in my tracks.

“I’m just going to go throw them out now,” I said.

“No,” she replied curtly.

“No? But...you just said…”

“I changed my mind. If you like them so much, I figure you should spend some more time with them. Dump them all out on the ground. Right here,” she said, pointing to the rug we stood on.

“But…”

“I don’t want to have to ask you again. Dump them out on the ground.”

I nodded and timidly stepped forward, clutching the trash can with both hands and slowly turning it over. Its contents seemed lodged inside of it for a moment before gravity finally got its grasp on it, and the contents of the bin slid out in one stinky mass. They hit the ground with a heavy splat, and the rolled up diapers rolled over each other and skittered about in a small area. The oldest diapers, those that had been marinating at the bottom of the bin, were even more pungent than I could’ve imagined - they should’ve never been exposed to the air again.

I looked back to Megan’s face, wondering where she was going with this. Would this be it? Would she just want me to leave my filthy used diapers strewn about the room for a while?

“If you like your stinky pampers so much, why don’t you show me. Why don’t you get down on the ground and hump your dirty diapers.”

My mouth dropped open and my heart felt like it stopped beating altogether. She couldn’t actually expect me to do that, right?

“I...but…”

“No excuses and no talking back.Take off your silly shorts so you can rub your diaper against all your past accidents.”

She stood there, arms crossed and with a serious look on her face. I knew better than to defy her orders. I slowly knelt on the ground, using my arms to try and gather the dirty diapers into a larger pile. Wave after wave of old smells came back to haunt me. I came close to gagging a few times - I couldn’t understand how Megan was keeping herself so composed right now.

I had never done anything like this before - nothing quite as pathetic as this. I looked back to Megan one last time, finding her eyes intensely focused on me. I sighed, looking back to my dirty pile. Finally, I leaned forward and planted my midsection atop the mountain of diapers. I wished that I wasn’t, but I was completely erect. For as shameful and humiliating as this was, I did actually want this; Megan’s presence was icing on the already perfectly degraded cake.

Slowly, I dragged my hips across the pile of diapers, before thrusting into them again. It was a strange sensation, not unlike the times I’ve found myself straddling a pillow or humping the mattress - usually at Megan’s command. But there was still something very unique about this too. The diapers themselves were firm from being full and wrapped up tightly, but they all managed to squish and contort into each other as my weight pressed into them.

I expected it to be a more awkward feeling than it was. I figured I’d give it a half-assed attempt before she finally took pity on me and told me to clean up the room. But I found myself quickly increasing the pace of my thrusts, and before I even realized it was happening, I knew that I was actually enjoying this. I was into it, and I don’t think I could’ve stopped if I wanted to.

“This is ridiculous,” I could hear Megan say somewhere in the background - her voice seemed distant, like it was in another room or another dimension. Maybe I was just lost in the moment. “Here I thought I’d be teaching you a lesson - but you just go and prove what a disgusting little creature you are by actually getting off on fucking a pile of your dirty pampers.”

I wished her words had granted me a little dose of reality, or even the tiniest bit of levity. But it just made me more desperate and more willing to see this through to the end.

I was moaning audibly. The longer it went, the harder I pressed into the dirty diapers. Once in a while, I’d feel something drip onto my leg, or I'd rub up against something cold or wet. I was becoming apathetic to the smell, but occasionally it’d hit me, and it seemed stronger and more rank than I recalled it being before. I suspected that below me, as I desperately rubbed up against the pile, old diapers were breaking open.

That might have been the thing to push me over the edge. The thought of fucking my old dirty diapers, while wearing a diaper, to the point where they were starting to open up seemed like a new low. The lowest low.

And now I wanted more. In my mind, Megan was pouring my used diapers over me. She was squatting over me herself. I had the same value to her as one of my filthy diapers, and she’d use me as one herself. I wanted it so badly.

“I’m...I…” I tried to say in between gasps and long moans.

“That’s it. Fill your diaper with your cum. You’ve earned that, humping a mound of your own shit like that.”

I twitched and shuddered as I felt myself climaxing into my diaper. With a final gasp, I lost my balance and collapsed atop the diapers. I could feel patches of wetness on my skin from the diapers below me. The stench came into focus again. I felt disgusting.

“So,” Megan said, her voice now feeling directly above me, looking down on me, as she had been the entire time. “How was that?”

I didn’t say anything. I didn’t know what to say.

“You can clean up these diapers now. Take them out to the trash. Then you can scrub the floor and the rug. I don’t even want to tell you the things I saw coming out of that pile while you fucked it. Though I imagine you’ll figure it out soon enough.”

She turned and marched from the room, leaving me behind in my mess. I’d do as she asked, of course. Eventually. First, I wanted to savor this moment, and contemplate what I had to do to experience it again.