Snow Way Out (Patreon)

Snow Way Out.

Nora opened the door and shivered. “You have got to be kidding me.” She kicked the wall of snow in front of her. “Where did all of this come from?” She hugged herself and shut the door. “This is not good.” She walked into the next room. “I have to head to work in an hour, and the snow outside is up to my chest. What am I going to do? Ugh?”

She reached into her pocket as her cellphone began to vibrate. “Hello?”

“Nora. Hey, it’s Antony.”

“Hey, Antony, have you seen all of this snow.” She walked over to the window. “It is like someone dropped a mountainside on my doorstep or something.”

“I know it’s crazy. I had to tunnel my way to my car this morning.”

She laughed and slapped herself with her pale hand. “I don’t even know if I can find my shovel in this mess. Look, I don’t think I can make it to work today.”

“Nora, you know you can’t just take a day off. We need someone to deliver the pizza.”

“You are kidding, right.” She turned around and walked into her garage. “I don’t even think I can get the door for my garage open, and even if I did, I don’t think the roads are plowed all the way out here.”

“Nora, I don’t care. Either you get your butt here on time, or we will discuss someone to replace you.”  She narrowed her eyes as the line went dead.

“The worst storm in almost ten years, and he wants me to deliver pizzas.” She threw up her arms. “To who?” She ran her hand along the side of her vehicle. “Well, I won’t figure it outstanding around here, will I?” Nora turned around and walked into the next room.

She shut the garage door behind her and walked into the kitchen. “I am going to cook up a quick snack before heading out there.” Nora walked over to the fridge. “I need something to keep me warm in that wintry mess. Huh? What is this?” She opened the door to the refrigerator and scratched at her blonde hair. “I don’t remember putting a plate of cookies in here.” She pulled out the strange tray and set them onto the oak table.

“Hmm, there is a note here.” She held the parchment up to the light.  “These sweets are the gift that will keep on giving. Just a small bite will help increase your performance tenfold, but careful as all it will take is a bite. Enjoy.”

“Umm, ok?” She shrugged her shoulders. “Well, this is kind of weird.” Nora narrowed her amber eyes and double-checked the piece of paper. “Who sent this thing? Why wouldn’t they put their names on it?” She looked down at the cookies. “How did these things even get into my house?” Nora crossed her arms and sighed. “This is so weird.”

She looked out the window and at the fields of snow. “Well, I should stop wasting time thinking about it.” She grabbed a cookie off the plate and took a bite. “I need to get out there and find a shovel. Time is wasting. Whoh.” Nora blinked as warmth spread throughout her body. “That is surprisingly good.”

Nora blinked and put her hand over her chest as the warmth spread throughout her body. Her blouse and pants suddenly began to tighten. “Hugh, what is going on?” She looked down. “Everything is so tight now.” She twisted her feet inward as her blue sneakers looked like they would burst apart. “Someone, please tell me what is going on?” She looked up at the fridge, the top now level with her breasts. “Why is everything shrinking? Ughgh.” Nora lowered her head as it hit the ceiling, and the warmth ended.

She took deep breaths. “What just happened?” She stepped backward and sat down, her butt now too big for the chair, so she sat on the edge of the seat. “Am I crazy, or did everything just shrink?” She put her hands on the wooden chair. “Especially this damn thing.” She tried to reposition herself only for a leg of the chair to snap. “Shit!” Nora fell to the ground, her hair falling over her body. She blew her bangs up off her face. “Well, that is just great.” She used the table to help push herself up, only to hit her head on the ceiling again. “This is absurd. Why would everything just shrink like this?” She looked at the cookies on the table. “Unless.” She picked up the note and reread it.

“Just a small bite will help increase your performance. . .”  Nora scratched at her head. “What if it meant increase things literally.” She put her hand on the ceiling. “And instead of performance, it made me grow.” She dropped the piece of paper to the ground. “You have got to be kidding me.” She began to take deep breaths in and out. “This is crazy. What am I going to do?” She ran her hands through her hair. “Ok, calm down. I have enough issues right now. I need to get outside and find that shovel and get a path cleared.” She laughed. “And that is considering I can even fit into my car.”

Nora crossed her arms. “Though maybe this is a good thing. I can shovel faster now. So the cookies did help.” She rushed into the next room and grabbed her coat off the coat rack. “Well, I guess thank you random magic cookies.” She let out another laugh. “I just hope it is enough so I can get to my job on time.”

Nora slowly slid on her coat. “Ugh, though I do have to say I should have put this on before taking a bite out of the growing cookie.” She groaned as she pulled her arms through the sleeves and stretched the fabric. Finally, her arms popped out the other side. “There.” She looked down at her hands. “Though my arms are more exposed than I would like.” She rubbed the base of her hands. “I should get some gloves as well.” She dug into her closet and pulled out a pair of blue gloves. “Here we go.”

She tried and tried to slide one of the gloves onto her right hand, but all she could manage was the glove covering her thumb, index finger, and middle finger. “Oh, come on.” She pulled the winter attire off her hand and threw it against the wall. “I need something to wear out there.” She threw her hands into her pockets. “Why can’t those cookies help me shrink back down?” She looked up at the clock. “Damnit, I only have forty-five minutes left to make it to the pizza joint. I need to just get out there.”

Nora rushed to the door and flung it open. “I can worry about my boots later.” She rolled her eyes. “I doubt I could get them on my feet or get my shoes off anyways.” She took a step outside and closed the door behind her. “Ok, I find the shovel, get the garage door dug up enough, and drive out. I think I can force a tunnel with my car.” She shivered. “Because I sure as hell don’t have enough time to dig a tunnel for my car out.”

She began to dig into the snow in the area where she had left her shovel. “From now on, I am going to leave the damn thing inside. Bbbbbrrrrr.” Nora tried to slide her hands into her pants but couldn’t fit her fingers into her pockets. “Stupid shrunken things.” She shivered and dug out some more snow. “Ugh, I am getting nowhere. I need to try something else.” She turned around and looked at her snow-covered door, the yellow paint just cracking through the glittering white blanket.

“How else am I going to get the damn car out, though? The snow is too high up to use the snowblower.” She crossed her arms. “Oh, what am I saying? I would have to be massive to think of digging my car out. Look at this craziness. I am not going anywhere.”

Nora’s eyes lit up. “Oh my god. The cookies.” She jumped with joy. “I can grow my way out of this problem. Dig my way out and get to work. It is so simple.” She opened the door and rushed back inside. “Why didn’t I think of this before?”

She rushed back into the kitchen and picked up the plate of cookies. “Thank you so much, mystery person.” She took a bite and walked back towards the door. “This will help so much.” She took another bite and swallowed the cookie whole as she moved onto the next one, the warmth spreading throughout her body. “Who needs to worry about a dam shovel when I can just grow and dig out my car like when I am at the beach?” Nora laughed. “I just wish it was warm like summer.”

As she munched on the second cookie, her head slammed into the ceiling. “Oww.” Before she could look up, her body was slammed against the ground. “Oufff.” Nora winced as her feet burst from her shoes, slid across the floor, into the living room, and pinned the couch against the wall. Her left shoulder quickly pinned the fridge against the wall while her other shoulder creamed the doorway which led to the living room.

She shook her head as she continued to grow, and the walls closed in on her. “This is not good.” She winced as her right arm burst through another barrier and into the next room. “What was I thinking?” Shrrrippppp.” Nora groaned as her clothing began to rip apart. “I should have waited until I was outside to eat the damn cookies.”

Her back hit the ceiling as her feet pressed against the wall. “Oh god, what was I thinking?” The house shook as she tried to pull her arms in to reduce the damage she was causing, but her body was growing too quickly. By the time she tucked her arms in, the sides of her chest were against the walls. Her head pushed through the foundation of the house, the building groaning in agony in response. Nora spit out plaster as she continued to swell. “Blech.” As she spat out the foul-tasting wall of her house, she took in a mouth full of snow, her eyes widening as a chill ran down her spine.

She shook her head and spit out the snow as her house crumbled on her back. “Ugh.” She pushed herself onto her knees, her home falling to pieces around her. “Well, great. Just great.” She hugged herself as she continued to grow, her bare legs pushing the snow around her back. “What is my insurance company going to say when they hear about this?” She hit herself on the forehead. “Hey, I umm ate some magic cookies and out grew my house can you cover me? Ya, I don’t think so.” She stood up and wiped the snow off her body. “At least my bra and underwear are still on me.” She rubbed her giant breasts as her pink bra stretched more and more. “Though I don’t know for how long.”

Nora sighed. “Well, I guess I should head to work. No point not to now.” She looked down at what used to be her home. “I mean, I need to earn some money to rebuild.” She kicked at the space where her house used to be. “Or maybe even invest in a new home more my size. Whatever that will be.”

She began to walk down the snow-covered landscape; her size slowly increased with every step. “Thankfully, I am not that cold.” She rolled her shoulders. “If there is one good thing I can say about these cookies, it is making my body very, very warm.” She blinked her eyes. “Well, I hope that everything is ok.”

Nora winced as her nipples pierced her bra. “Ohhh, great.” She gently touched the sides of her breasts. “Well, I guess I can’t find a new pair in my size anyways.” She shook her head. “Hey, I think I am finally done growing.” She looked around. “The land doesn’t seem to be shrinking anymore.” Crrrrunhch.”

Nora looked down to see she had just stepped on someone's house. “Oh no.” She bent down in the snow next to the home and pulled the dented roof up. “I am so sorry. It is so hard to see anything in all of this snow.” She shook her head. “I swear I couldn’t see your home.” She looked inside, but no one was home. “Phew. That was close.” She sat back onto her heels. “That could have been a disaster.”

Nora stood back up and took a deep breath in. “Why do I still feel very, very hot?” She wiped giant beads of sweat from her forehead. “And I still feel like my body is growing, but that is crazy.” She looked down at the ground. “Nothing is moving.” She wiggled her toes in the snow. “I don’t feel the ground beneath me shrinking. I don’t get it. Maybe being about seventy feet tall messes with my mind.” She shook her head as the fabric in her bra groaned. “That is probably it.” She began to walk once more to the pizza place where she worked.

A few minutes later, Nora towered over her workplace. She bent down and tapped on the doorway. “Hello in there.” She peered inside. “It is me, Nora. I am here for my shift.”

A woman in a black and yellow uniform rushed out as she ran her hands through her blonde hair. “Oh my god, Nora? Is that you?” She lifted her head and blinked her green eyes. “What in the world happened to you?”

“It is a long story.” Nora shrugged her arms. “You know. Strange person sends you growing cookies. You eat too much of the growing cookies, and now you are dozens of feet tall.” She shrugged. “Just a normal Thursday.”

“Umm ya. If you call that a Thursday.” She took a few steps back into the building. “I am going to go get Antony.”

“Hey, Gale, wait.”

“Just hold on, Nora.” She shut the door. “Antony. We have a problem.”

Nora narrowed her eyes and tried to look into the interior of the building. “Hey, come back here. This isn’t a problem.” She tapped on the glowing sign of the building. “Gale.”

Antony walked to the door and cracked it open. “Nora. I am, umm, glad you came. Is everything alright?”

“Couldn’t be better. I am here to deliver pizzas.”

He shook his tan head, the dark hat on his head shifting back and forth. “Umm, it’s ok. You can go home for the day.”

“No, I want to help.”

“It isn’t a problem, Nora.” He took a step back. “Just head home, ok.”

“Hey, I need the money.” She slowly tightened her grip on the roof of the building. “I mean it.”

He held up his hands. “Ok, ok.” He turned around. “Gale, tell the others that Nora here is handling all deliveries for today.”

Nora narrowed her eyes. “Excuse me?”

He looked up at her. “Well, what else do you think you can do? You can’t fit inside the building. Take it or leave it.”

She crossed her arms. “Alright. Alright. As long as I get paid.” She tapped on top of the building hard enough, so the foundation shook. “Triple the normal amount.”

“Fine, fine. Whatever.” He walked back inside. “Just because you are suddenly big and tall, you are pushy as well. Figures.”

Nora stood up and stretched. “I heard that.” She shook her head. “I guess there is nothing to do now but wait. Shrrrripppp. She looked down to see her bra snap in two. “What in the world?” She grasped her breasts. “How did these things get so huge? Ugh, they feel so warm.” She rubbed them. “And so full. Oh god, what is going on?”

“Hey, Nora. Come on. Time for you to use that size for something and take these pizzas across town.” She bent down. “Get going.”