Pausing Pledges (Patreon)

Hey guys. First off, I'm sorry about not addressing this writing pause sooner. Some people have been speculating a variety of reasons for the pause, but it really boils down to anxiety. I doubted myself and thought over my story's progression too much. There's a certain amount of perfectionism that's helpful. On the other hand, too much is destructive, and it's resulted in this extended pause.

I understand that trying to write perfectly means never writing. Every word is flawed, and I should find joy in those mistakes. They might become happy accidents further down the line. For me, I really want to do this right and make the story as excellent as I can. That isn't precisely why I paused, but it does sit at the core of the issue.

The drive to perfection resulted in a fullstop to production. If anything, the idea of making something perfect should be found in the process and not the product; it's about getting better, not being the best to begin with. Those ideas of executing without any flaws, they haunt me at times, and I need to keep them under control. They are impossible fantasies, and they lead to anxiety and turmoil in my life.

So I'll be pausing pledges and starting writing here again. I don't want you guys to donate if I'm not putting in effort, and despite struggling, I haven't actually created much as of late. I didn't really burnout as much crumple under my own internal pressure. I will continue to try and keep these anxieties under control. For now, I'll manage as best I can.

If you decide to empathize and understand, thank you. If you don't, thank you for staying as long as you have. I appreciate each and every one of you, and your support means the world to me. Stay safe everyone, and I'll try to avoid letting this happen again. At the same time, I think this is perhaps a creative cycle of some sort.

If that's the case, I'll continue this cycle as many times as I need too. I love writing, and I won't forget that.