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Tom Sweeny hates Martin Scorsese? Did Uncle Ben kill himself? Is dancing really all that impressive? Chickens shitting in Physics classrooms? Staind and Kid Rock making cringe hoorah music? Did Facebook ruin high school reunions? All this and more on todays episode of People Falling Down and Hurting Themselves (TOTALLY REAL)

ACTUAL FILE THIS TIME

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Jack

Love the little thing at the beginning!

Anonymous

Finally I thought I was the only one.

Sweeney's Girlfriend Archive

I can't tell if "Two birds one stone" was intentionally a golf/tombstone pun or not.

Anonymous

IM WAKING UP TO ASH IN DUST I WIPE MY ASS AND I SLAP MY NUTS

Anonymous

Hey big thanks for doing my question about gloving. As well as Derrick, I also hold the idea that rave music is mostly shit. There's a real specific kind of EDM that does anything for me; most of it feels as understimulating as floating in deep space on thirty doses of ambien. Nightcore invokes an animalistic v i o l e n c e deep within my soul, it's so awful Intricate bass edm is the only stuff for this guy

Anonymous

Also, yeah, raves can be boring as hell without substances. I have something to do at least with gloving that keeps me entertained, especially doing shows for people, that are synced up to the music. That's the only reason I go tbh

Anonymous

Gotta be that guy, Jessie was not Ellie's bf

Anonymous

Good shit as always boys 👍