ALLCAPS COOKBOOK: Caramel-Habanero Pasta (Patreon)

Caramel-Habanero Pasta with Bacon and Greens

HI EVERYBODY IT IS TIME FOR ONE OF MY WEIRD INVENTIONS.

This pile of deliciousness was invented because I couldn’t decide what I wanted so I just made something with all the things in my head HA HA THIRD TRIMESTER IS REAL. Like, I can barely concentrate through the process of making a one-pot dish so I had to CONSTANTLY ENTERTAIN MYSELF BY ADDING NEW INGREDIENTS LOL MY BRAIN IS A HEDGEMAZE.

It’s good, though, I promise.

Be gentle with the habanero though? RESPECT ITS POWER. However, I have gone from being all THE SPICE MUST FLOW to being all PLEASE LET THE SPICE FLOW SLOWLY AND MODESTLY THANK YOU because nothing tastes the same because this whole pregnancy is like being possessed by the devil only the devil is (presumably, no solid evidence yet) cute and mainly just doesn’t like anything I used to like and enjoys me not getting anything done, because the devil needs all my brain and energy to make thumbs or something.

ANYWAY.

Also, roast lemons all the time and put them in everything? Because DAMN. 

Ingredients

Two chicken breasts or four thighs (I do prefer thighs) sliced thin

Four slices thick-cut bacon

1 whole orange pepper

1 habanero pepper (2 IF YOU LIKE YOUR FOOD ANGRY)

1 large white onion (or fennel)

Small knob ginger

6-7 garlic cloves

Generous squeeze of orange

2 lemons

1 heaping tblsp italian seasoning

1 heaping tblsp paprika + 1 tsp

1/4 cup olive oil

Splash of white wine

2 tblsp brown sugar

Small pat butter

2 tblsp + 1/2 cup heavy cream

Fresh pasta (I used egg fettucine) RESERVE PASTA WATER I MEAN A LOT OF IT

Giant handful spinach

10-15 leaves basil

Lime zest, brown sugar, and basil for garnish

METHOD ACTING

Preheat oven to 400. Slice all peppers and lemons in half, place face down on a baking tray lined in alumium foil. Cut onion in half, put half on the tray, reserve other half (dice it for later use). Drizzle in olive oil and roast for 30 min. If you wanted to roast garlic with this, I APPROVE OF YOUR CHOICES JUST THROW A WHOLE HEAD IN YOLO.

While this happens, fry up your bacon. Now, NORMALLY, I would advise using the fat to cook your chicken in a minute but I find the smoky pork flavor kind of drowns out everything else, so THIS ONE TIME I’m going to say just crumble up the crispy bacon, set to the side, and forget about the fat. I KNOW SO CRAZY.

In a fresh, large saucepan, heat olive oil on low heat, add chicken, and cook until white on all sides. Add the teaspoon of paprika and cook until brown and crispy. Set aside. DEGLAZE THAT SHIT WITH WHITE WINE LIKE YOU SHOULD ALWAYS BE DOING. 

Around now, your veggies should be done roasting. Scoop out lemony innards, discarding seeds. Dump it all, plus italian seasoning, paprika, ginger, orange, and olive oil to a food processor, and puree until SMOOVE.

Add diced onion to pan, cook on LOW until the edges start to brown and the onion is translucent, like halfway to caramelized. While this is going on, cook pasta according to package instructions. Then add brown sugar, allow to liquefy. Add the 2 tblsp of heavy cream and butter combine. This is a quick and dirty and oniony caramel! SO GOOD. 

Add veggie puree to pan. Let simmer for 4-5 min, then add in heavy cream. Bring back up to a simmer and add pasta water until the sauce is a medium velvety consistency, not too thick or too thin. Throw in chicken and spinach and stir until it just wilts. Turn off heat and stir in basil

Serve garnished with thinly chopped basil, lime zest, crumbled bacon, and a light dusting of brown sugar. BASK IN ACCOLADES.