#69 Four Ways To Prevent Over Doing Kinks With Your Partner (Patreon)

When it comes to spicy food, my boyfriend LOVES to feel the burn. 

I like spice too but not nearly as much as he does. So whenever we make a meal together like curry, I get to determine how much spice will go into the pot. My boyfriend can choose to add in more spice on his own plate after that. 

This example of compromise (or "halfway happy" as Eleven from Stranger Things would say) is helpful for those of us in kinky relationships as well. Whoever has the lowest tolerance for a certain spice level or kink  determines the limits. 

This is why I suggest letting your partner initiate kink play, that way they don't feel pressured and everything goes smoothly. I know when you're excited it's tempting to rush into things but that can get messy. 

If you try to role play with your partner too often or even talk about roleplaying too often it can raise insecurities with your partner. Sometimes they may start to question whether you love them for them or for what they can do for you and your fetish. 

So the best way to prevent over doing kinks with your partner is to let them lead the pace and to assure them along every step of the way that you love them for who they are and not just the fantasy they can fulfill for you. Always remember that people are more open to change when they feel loved and appreciated for who they are. 

All my best, 

Lo