Battle Royale w. Cheese! Turn 4.6 - Lucy and Erza (Hellish Hotel) (Patreon)

> SOMETHING CHEAP AND LEWD (LUCY) [INANIMATE TF, BAD END]

After a few seconds of stroking her chin and humming in thought, Doujinshi slammed her fist against the desk. “Ahah!” she said. “I have the perfect idea. Forget all that nyiche crap about inflation and expansion and whatever. What I nyeed is mass-market appeal, nya! Something to tickle the clit of the lowest common denominator! Nyou know, something cheap and trashy that anyone can enjoy. Nyou! Nyou’re perfect for that, nya. People looove busty blondes. Nyou’ll make an excellent batch of pornography.”

Lucy stared at her in horror as the catgirl’s eyes bored deep into her soul. There weren’t normal eyes either–they had no irises, just giant black pupils with a thin slice cut out.

“Okay, okay,” said Doujinshi, stretching her fingers. “How should we begin…? Ah, I know!” Her hands danced across the typewriter, producing a series of deafening clicks.

As Lucy stared, trembling in fear, her world blurred as if it were made of wet paint.

“Lucy!” cried Erza, the instant before someone smudged her away too.

As Erza and Doujinshi and everything else in the room washed away, Lucy found herself struck by a terrible, crushing pressure. It smushed her flat, one-dimensional, compressed her entire form into a single layer as thin as a sheet of paper. She screamed, tried to stand up and fight it, but she couldn’t, she just couldn’t– Erza! Natsu! …Anyone! 

Dingdong!

With a gasp, Lucy looked around. To her surprise, she found herself not flat but standing in the kitchen of a quaint little house. Her bikini was gone–she was properly clothed again. She wore a tightly-fitting blue dress and overtop it: an apron. Her hands, wrapped in oven gloves, held a tray of freshly-baked cookies. They smelled delicious.

Where–where am I–?

Dingdong! It took her a second to recognise it as a doorbell. “Oh!” she said, lips moving on their own. “It must be that plumber I called!”

Placing her tray of cookies on the counter, she adjusted her hair and made her way to the front door. She opened it to a tanned, handsome man, his body like sculpted caramel, his pants bulging with cock. “Morning, ma’am,” he said, running a hand through his gorgeous locks. “Where’s the leak?”

The world paused. “Hmm,” said Doujinshi’s voice. “Would it be too much to have her say ‘In my pants?’ That’s a bit quick even for porn, isn’t it? Maybe I should draw it out a little more first, nya? Have some polite conversation before all the humping…? …Aw, to hell with it! Let’s skip straight to the sex.”

The world blurred. When it refocused, Lucy found herself lying–to her horror–naked on her bed. Spreading her legs, she slipped her fingers into her sex and parted it invitingly. “Mmm~, I’ve got a pipe you can fix right here, big boy.”

Dropping his pants, the plumber laughed. “Looks like I’ll need my special tool for this job.” He stroked his cock, which was already erect. The sight of it made Lucy want to recoil in horror. It must be twenty inches long! How was it ever going to fit inside–?

Clambering onto the bed, the plumber grabbed her legs and thrust. Lucy screamed as his penis slammed deep, deep into her pussy, over and over and over, splintering her mind with utter ecstasy. Digging her hands into the covers, Lucy squealed in delight.

Finally, the man gave one last thrust and emptied his balls with a grunt. Lucy screamed and fell back, heart pounding, as the world around her dissolved…

…And she found herself back in the house’s kitchen.

Dingdong!

*

Erza clasped her mouth and gasped in horror as page after page of exaggerated sex filled the magazine’s pages.

“Anyway,” said Doujinshi, typing away. “So this goes on for another hundred or so pages and then it all just sort of ends, nya.” She stopped typing, and the magazine slammed shut. “What do nyou think, nya?”

Erza gaped at her.

“Well, whatever,” said Doujinshi, waving the question aside. Stretching an arm over to the bed, she snatched up the magazine that had been Lucy and flipped through it casually. “Once we’re done here, I’ll have a billion plus copies of this published. I should make a pretty tidy profit. Fufu.”

She gave Erza a strange look. “Anyway, nyou should probably get out of here, nya. We’re almost at that part of the script where I go crazy and start hunting nyou. …Unless there’s anything else nyou’d like me to write?