Afternoon Meditation 2/25/24 (Patreon)

Hi folks!

How’s everyone day going?

I’ve successfully relocated to my LA office!

I specifically woke up at 430AM and set off at 5AM to purposefully drive in the dark. While it’s a bit more dangerous, I love early morning night drives, especially for road trips/long distances. I find it very meditative, and this one was especially so.

For a while I just had classical music playing as I was exiting Vegas proper, and some ways into the long desert darkness I decided to start playing some music. And my god, a car surround system is just SO much more immersive than a computer.

I listened to the ON MY YOUTH album from WayV as a whole, and listened to the title track, oh like several gazillion times? I have a lot of regrets over the mistakes I’ve made within the past few years, but this song really helped me work through it.

Also, something I didn’t realize until I heard it through a car surround system: POPPIN’ LOVE is like one of my favorite songs. Period. Like of all time. That song is NUTS.

Also, I’m pretty sure I LOVE Kun. Just the gravitas and DEPTH of his voice is unmatched and really brings ON MY YOUTH to life. And in general, I love the XiaoJun, TEN, Kun vocal trio. I think they might be up there with freakin’ NCT DREAM. It’s not that they’re individually great vocals, it’s that I love the combination of their voices.

After, I listened to the entire SHINee ‘HARD’ album and that album… Going fast on the highway into the dark nothingness of the desert… I experienced something holy. Damn, is SM suddenly one of my favorite labels now???

I unloaded half my equipment but I’m far too exhausted to unload the rest so that’s probably what I’ll do this evening after some rest.

I had a lot of deep and weird thoughts during this 5 hour drive. A lot has happened to me in the past few years, and it was a lot of emotional and logical reshuffling. In the end, I’m embarrassed that I became so obsessed with “being others’ form of therapy” that I neglected my own.

My mindset was flawed and I appreciate both you guys, but especially Blaire, for helping me course correct.

I’m honestly scared to be alone for however long. But I’ll be doing my very best.

I’m going to eat lunch and rest for now, but I hope you guys have a good rest of your day :)

-Jaehyuk PD