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Good morning everyone!

Itā€™s currently 11AM at the time of writing this where I am. Whatā€™s so very strange, the day before I slept 8 hours and I felt both physically and emotionally exhausted.

After my late night livestream, I only slept a little over half of that amount but itā€™s the most clarity Iā€™ve felt all week.

Hereā€™s my schedule for today:

11 - 12: Breakfast + wind up

12 - 1330: Clean

1330 - 1500: Filming Block

1500 - 1630: Lunch, E-mails, Gotta do my taxes!

1630 - 1730: Go to the park & take a walk (Iā€™m gonna need some air after taxes)

1730 - 1900: Filming Block

And Iā€™ll be offline starting 19:00 / 7PM PST.

Cleaning is a big part of my mental health and itā€™s something Iā€™ve put off in favor of both my anxiety and work, which only obviously worsen the two.

Thank you to the Patrons who helped me calmly work this out. A balanced way to get a good amount of filming done, my ā€œlife choresā€ (ARGHHH TAXES!!!), and having time for my mental health as well.

Iā€™ve always been an ā€œall or nothing guyā€ ā€œ100% or nothingā€ ā€œmake choices and never look backā€. Iā€™m trying to alter and reframe my thinking based on my CBT practices.

I want to make mindful and intentional choices, and reflect later.

The Roman Emperor Marcus Aurelius committed to using the morning to prepare for the day ahead, and reflecting on the day in the evening. When I was healthier, I was doing that out of interest, but I see now how fulfilling and how much clarity that gave me so Iā€™ll be doing that again now.

Iā€™ve always had a terrible ability to keep track of journals and notebooks, so Iā€™m trying to do so here. Not ā€œjournalā€ per say, Iā€™m using my own notes for my private and more darker thoughts to expel them, but because this helps me clear my thoughts, get feedback (god damn yā€™all are some smart people) and I can reflect, adapt, and adjust.

Through this process Iā€™ve been hearing that just as many of you are going through difficult times in your lives. So letā€™s promise to make today just 2% a better day than yesterday.

Iā€™m going to get started, I hope you all have a wonderful day or evening, and Iā€™ll see you soon in todayā€™s girl group videos šŸ˜Š

Comments

izzy

idk if this is late news but (g)idle had a comeback with super lady

Sami Casingal

I know it wonā€™t be for this month but I really hope you start nana tour soon. I canā€™t wait for your reaction to certain scenes šŸ˜†!