ROBs and Sidekicks Part 4 (Patreon)

Dawn kept one hand on the wall of the 'secret' tunnel as she gazed down at the large pool of 'lava' that filled the bottom of the large cavern. "I'd feel worse about cheating if the dungeon wasn't filled with nasty traps and monsters."

"Same," Myst replied as he studied the guidebook he'd borrowed from one of the guards on the fifth level. "The floating platforms shift, move and drop into the lava if you jump on the wrong one."

"Any reason we can't just fly across?" Beth asked as she glanced between the hallway entrance on the left and the ledge on the right where there was another tunnel.

"Flying causes you to get teleported into the lava," Myst replied as he walked over and jumped onto one of the platforms.

"Is it bad that I feel sorry for the dungeon?" Hermione asked as she followed Myst once he jumped to the next platform.

Dawn laughed as she followed Hermione. "Probably."

"I'd feel worse if the third and fourth level weren't death traps," Myst mused as he waited for the next platform to move close enough. "Or the thirteenth."

Dawn jumped to the first platform. "Probably just as well that we skipped to the fifth level and jumped to the fourteenth level with the slide, even if some of the monsters the guide described sound interesting."

"Interesting is one way to put it," Myst muttered, not wanting anything to do with the level filled with mind flayers and regenerating berserk trolls that refused to die unless you completely burned them which was impossible because the level wouldn't allow fire magic to be used.

"I'm still not sure why taking a slide on the twelfth level that went down took us up to the fourteenth level," Beth complained.

"I'm guessing magic," Myst said as he jumped to the next platform then jumped over to the ledge, skipping the last five platforms that most people would have had to jump between. "At least we don't have to deal with the spinning platform."

"For the best," Dawn agreed as Hermione jumped to the floating platform Myst had just vacated.

Hermione jumped to the ledge. "It still seems a bit unfair, the dungeon is just trying to protect itself. Wouldn't you be a bit annoyed if you were a dungeon and someone parked people in every level so you couldn't change things?"

"I'd probably try to murder them," Myst admitted.

"Same." Dawn jumped to the ledge, skipping the rest of the platforms.

Beth shook her head then jumped to the next platform, not trusting herself to make the jump all the way to the ledge.

"Do you want to knock out the guild members so the dungeon can change the platforms?" Dawn asked Hermione.

"Maybe." Hermione considered the question while they waited for Beth, not sure how aware the dungeon was or how much it was actually bothered by the guild.

Beth jumped to the next platform then jumped to the ledge, nearly hitting the wall because she put a bit too much force into her jump. "At least I didn't hit the ceiling."

Myst grinned. "Or the invisible wires."

Dawn shook her head. "Don't give the dungeon suggestions."

Myst grinned at Dawn then turned and walked down the short tunnel into a chamber with marble walls and a rune covered black stone altar in the middle of the room. He glanced at the solid metal door and the bronze bell with a chain next to it then looked at the card table off to the side of the room where two rather annoyed looking guards were playing cards with a five or six year old girl in a black dress.

"Hello! Are you here to rescue me?" the blonde haired girl asked hopefully as she laid down her cards, showing a full house.

"Rescue?" Hermione asked, glaring at the two guards.

One of the guards snorted as he tossed his cards on the table. "Don't listen to her, if anyone needs rescuing it's us, she's a card shark."

The girl stuck her tongue out at the guard. "It's not my fault you suck at cards."

"Feel free to use the altar, just don't pull the chain on the bell," the other guard said as he tossed his cards on the table and stood up.

"Let me guess, it summons the boss?" Myst asked as the girl cheerfully pulled the coins in the middle of the table to her side of the table.

"Yeah," the guard replied as he walked over and stood in front of the door. "Which is a good way to die and not remotely worth the loot so don't bother trying unless you want me to kill you."

The girl giggled. "They just don't like Sally because she's better at cards."

He glanced at the girl. "No, we don't like Sally because she's a lunatic that tried to cut Ralph's liver out."

"To be fair, he sort of deserved it," the other guard pointed out.

"What did he do?" Hermione asked, glancing between the girl and the guards.

"He broke my tea set," the girl replied with pout.

"Poison?" Myst asked as he walked over to the altar.

The guard that was standing shook his head. "No, he's just a prick and an idiot."

"How does the altar work?" Myst asked, not actually sure how it worked.

"It's easy, you just set something on the altar and use the menu to remove negative qualities," the girl offered.

The guard sitting near the girl nodded. "It's surprisingly user friendly."

"Thanks," Myst replied as he used his replication power to copy the alchemy boosting cursed shirt and set it on the altar. He grinned when a floating blue screen appeared over the altar that showed the shirt's various magical qualities.

"Where the hell did you get that?" the guard that was standing in front of the bell sputtered when he saw the rather large collection of abilities displayed.

Myst glanced at the guard. "You can see the screen, can't you?"

"Yep!" Dawn agreed as she walked over to the altar.

"Yeah," the guard admitted.

"You have some nice loot, do you want to trade?" the girl asked hopefully, always looking for better gear to outfit her minions with.

The guard next to the bell sighed. "Please don't give her anything she can use to kill people, we're supposed to keep her out of trouble."

"Why?" Hermione asked.

"Because she's the dungeon avatar and if she's stuck here, she's not on the other levels causing trouble," he explained.

Beth glanced at the innocent looking girl. "Let me guess, she likes to lead people into traps?"

"That only happened a couple of times, it's not my fault they walked into a faulty teleporter that had an 'Out of Order' sign on it," the girl complained with a pout.

"It is when you tell them that it's a shortcut to a secret treasure vault," the guard near the bell argued.

The girl shrugged. "To be fair, he was the last person on the level and I was really bored."

"Which is how we ended up with level thirteen being a death trap," he complained.

"Don't worry, I have lots of warning signs up," the girl said proudly.

"Makes sense," Myst replied as he selected the quality that turned your bones to ashes when the shirt was equipped and touched the button to remove it. He smiled when the quality vanished from the list without screwing with anything else. He reached down and touched the shirt so he'd be able to copy it then removed the enchantment that let ghosts touch it. He picked the shirt up and tossed it to Hermione. "Have fun, I got rid of the bit that turns your bones to ash."

"Thanks," Hermione replied as she examined the shirt with her sunglasses, wanting to make sure all of the curses were dealt with.

Myst replicated the version of the shirt he'd just tossed to Hermione and removed the enchantment that would have given him 'perfect' breasts. He checked everything with his sunglasses then equipped the shirt. "I could get used to this."

The guard raised an eyebrow. "Where did you get the shirts?"

"Off one of the spiders in the new dungeon south of town," Myst replied as he pulled his ring off and set it on the altar. He removed the enchantment that caused the wearer to take double damage from holy damage then put it back on.

"How much for the shirt?" the girl asked Hermione.

Hermione tossed the girl the shirt, figuring Myst could always make another duplicate. "Consider it a thank you for letting us use your altar."

"Really? You're the best!" the girl replied as she pulled the magic shirt on over her dress.

Myst used his replication power to copy the Gloves of the Swamp Witch and set them on the altar, curious if he could get rid of the negatives without scraping the positives.

The guard next to the bell stared at the floating display. "I don't suppose you'd be interested in selling those?"

"That depends, do you have any artifacts that you're willing to trade?" Myst asked as he removed the negative qualities on the gloves. 'I'd rather not lose 10% of my potions and I can always use the old copy if I need to poison someone.'

"Do I look like a member of the royal family?" the guard asked sarcastically.

"Not really," Myst replied as he stuck the gloves in his inventory.

The girl activated her shirt transmogrification ability and turned her dress into a knee length black skirt. "That's better."

"I don't suppose I can get you to turn around or take a walk to the ledge so you don't see the rest of my gear?" Myst asked the guard that was standing up, not seeing a point in letting the guards see Beth's bracelets as he didn't want to cause Tara trouble.

The guard shook his head. "Yeah, that's not going to happen, you might pull the chain or stab me in the back. My guild would send me to the darkest hell if I let the dungeon get destroyed."

Myst glanced over at the shoot that sent people back to the first floor then smiled at the guard. "I don't suppose I can get you to reconsider?"

"Are you willing to give me the gloves?" the guard asked sarcastically.

Myst laughed as he pulled his jester's cap out of his inventory and dropped it on the altar. "Not a chance in hell."

"You should know, they record everything for their guild," the girl said in a voice that carried as a group of adventurers walked into the hallway.

The guard by the bell scowled at the girl. "Don't cause trouble Tiffany."

"Are you saying you didn't stab the last group of adventurers and steal their gear?" Tiffany asked as the group of five wary and bloody adventurers walked into the room.

"They tried to ring the bell," the guard complained, then sighed when he noticed the group of adventurers that had just walked into the room. "Don't pay attention to the dungeon avatar."

The young lady in robes glared at the guards. "Is that why Nathan got robbed when he left the dungeon?"

"Probably," Tiffany said with a shrug. "I blame the new dungeon, she has a lot of really nice loot."

The group's fighter nodded. "They also have a nice shop."

Myst finished decursing the rest of his gear while the guards were distracted and ran his finger over one of the runes on the altar so he could copy the altar. "That's it for me."

Dawn gestured and conjured an old fashioned changing screen around the altar, leaving a gap on the side so they could enter and leave without letting the guards read the display. "You're up Beth."

"What the hell?" the guard by the bell sputtered. "Take that down!"

"Tiffany's right, I don't need someone from your guild jumping me on the way out," Myst replied as he walked out of the gap and stood in front of the screen, trying to give Beth a chance to get her bracelets decursed before the guards could cause trouble.

"Let's just toss him down the shoot," the young lady in robes suggested. "We're leaving town anyways and I'd rather not pay twenty gold per item we need decursed."

"Works for me," the girl in leather armor suggested as Beth rushed over to the altar to get her bracelets decursed.

"Screw it," the guard grumbled as he drew his sword. "If you don't pay, you're not walking out of here alive, I get a fourth of the coin."

"Earnest, stop being an ass," the guard that was sitting at the table complained. "I don't need my pay docked for getting resurrected."

"Where's your spine?" Earnest demanded. "You know how the guildmaster gets when people don't pay the fees for decursing things."

"Yeah, he grumbles, complains and docks our pay, it's not worth dying over it," the guard that was sitting down replied as he shuffled the cards.

"You think you can take us?" the group's fighter asked with amusement.

"I've got the Vampire King's Sword, I'm not dying to a bunch of scrubs," Earnest replied then turned to look at Myst. "Take that down or I'm going to kill you."

Myst stepped forward and used his Chrono Break ability, causing everyone to freeze. He frowned when he examined the guard's sword. "Ten percent life steal? Do you honestly think that's going to help or do you think your guild is going to pay to resurrect you?" he mused as he quickly scanned the rest of the guard's gear.

"Thirty points of strength, twenty dexterity and thirty seven vitality," Myst mused as he conjured his sword and tapped the guard's sword with his blade. He watched the guard's sword 'slowly' turn to dust and get absorbed by his sword, the entire process taking less than ten seconds. "I should probably hit the world with the shield hero and copy some legendary weapons."

"Then again, I'm already a gamer, do I really want to mess with it?" he mused as he dismissed his sword and snapped his fingers, causing the man's clothes and equipment to vanish and appear in his hands. "I really need to send Genie a thank you card."

He stuffed the clothes in his inventory then grabbed the guard and tossed him towards the shoot that would send him back to the first level of the dungeon, rather amused when the guard froze mid flight after crossing the boundary of the circle. He turned then unfroze time and watched the guard fly into the shoot with a shocked look on his face.

"What the hell?" the other group's fighter sputtered.

"He threatened to kill me because I didn't want him reporting my gear to his guild," Myst replied with a shrug. "Is that going to be a problem?" he asked the other guard.

"Not my monkey, not my problem," the other guard replied with a shrug. "I'm just here to make sure no one destroys the dungeon heart."

"I have no intention of damaging the dungeon heart," Myst assured the guard and the dungeon's avatar. "I just want to get my stuff decursed and leave."

Beth finished selecting the bracelet's various drawbacks other than the Nemesis curse and hit the button to remove them, more than a little shocked when the altar didn't explode or do anything weird when the curses vanished. She used her copy of Myst's sunglasses to check her bracelets then slipped them back on and stepped away from the altar. "It worked!"

"Cool," Myst replied, happy that they wouldn't have to find another version of Genie to remove the rest of the curses and problems.

"Can I bribe you into tossing Frank down the hole so I can change the traps?" Tiffany asked hopefully.

"Not funny," the remaining guard complained.

Myst turned to look at the dungeon's avatar. "How much are you offering?"

"Twenty seven gold and about double that in silver," the girl offered.

Frank glanced at the pile. "Give me half and I'll jump down the shoot myself. I'll just tell them I got tossed."

"Really?" the girl asked hopefully.

Frank nodded. "As long as you promise not to remove the altar or change the path for a week, I don't have a problem with you building more levels."

The girl pushed her entire pile of coins towards the guard. "Deal!"

"I'm going to need an actual contract on that one," Frank pointed out.

"Fine," Tiffany grumbled, hiding her grin as she set up the contract, looking forward to building some more levels and moving her core now that she had some points saved up.

'No, more issues with my powers not working during the day, rotating powers or getting weaker because I'm wearing clothes or the elemental alignments don't match,' Beth thought as she rushed over and hugged Myst, ecstatic that he'd found a way to fix her family's artifact. "Thank you for helping me fix my bracelets."

"You're welcome," Myst assured her as he gave her a hug.

Dawn gestured and dispelled the screen so that she could see what the other group was going to decurse. "Are we sticking around?"

"Just until Tiffany and Frank finish making a deal," Myst replied as he walked a touch closer to the altar so he could use Chrono Break if he saw anything interesting pop up.

"Sounds good," Dawn replied, fairly sure she'd have plenty of time to get back before her sister.

0o0o0

Beth sighed as she flopped down on Myst's couch next to Hermione. "We should have kidnapped her."

"Heroes aren't supposed to kidnap people," Hermione pointed out, wishing she could have talked Dawn into staying a bit longer and teaching them a couple more tricks.

Myst finished putting the container of juice away in the fridge, grabbed two of the three glasses he'd poured and walked over to the couch. "Besides, even if I was inclined to kidnap someone and I'm not, I'm not kidnapping the girlfriend of an unstable witch with the power to level cities."

"Cities?" Beth asked excitedly, wondering if they could talk her into helping them with their demon lord problem.

"Pretty much," Myst replied as he set both of the glasses on the end table next to the couch.

"How unstable are we talking about?" Hermione asked warily.

"Willow tends to get a bit overprotective when it comes to her friends, she's normally pretty reasonable, I just don't want to push her buttons. Besides, we got amazing loot, Dawn will be back tomorrow or the next day for another adventure," he added as he walked over to the shelf filled with DVDs and started skimming through his collection of movies.

"That's assuming she can find us," Hermione pointed out.

"If not, we'll open a portal," Myst assured them, hoping everything would work out and that he could find the right world.

Beth frowned as she thought about the demon lord she was supposed to defeat. "What else do we need to grab before we deal with the chancellor and the demon lord?"

"I wouldn't mind a decent base and some armor," Myst replied as he grabbed the first Iron Man movie then walked over to the DVD player. "On that note, we might as well watch a movie and relax while I make some food."

"Sounds good," Hermione admitted, looking forward to the chance to zone out and relax while trying to process the last couple of hours.

0o0o0