👩‍🎨🖼️ trying oil pastels + chat about failing on purpose and being "good" at art (Patreon)

Hello! (๑ > ᴗ < ๑)

For a long time now when it comes to making art, digital drawing and painting have been my go-to. Following close behind is a sketchbook and pencil or pen. I've briefly experimented with other mediums like acrylic paint, gouache, watercolor (my sworn nemesis), color pencils, marker, and ink, but always found myself returning to the familiarity of the tablet and a sheet of paper. It was equal parts enjoyment and comfort, until it wasn't, and comfort became an overwhelmingly part of the equation. Even though I couldn't outwardly voice it at the time, I could sense that my decision to plug in the tablet and pick up the pen again and again grew out of a need for predictability and hiding from the unknown. If I had to fail (preferably not), it would be on my own terms in the comfort of a digital canvas.

I recently bought a set of oil pastels because one of my favorite artists Sandi Hester regularly uses them and it looked like a lot of fun. I greatly admire her try-anything approach to art and using tools to suit your needs and expression rather than feeling careful and precious about supplies. I tried them out when they arrived, the medium foreign under the clueless guidance of my hands. I didn't feel like I could make what I wanted to with the unwieldy sticks so shelved them for some other time and swiftly returned to the safe burrow of the screen. 

Since watching this Struthless video, it's encouraged me to see creativity from a new perspective and understand failure as the goal/purpose rather than something to avoid. It's made trying new things, a historically terrifying undertaking, exciting instead of dreadful. I don't have to concern myself with making anything 'good' and can just explore ideas as they come. So what if it looks bad or I don't like it? That wasn't the purpose of trying anyway. 

I've felt so much more comfortable exploring new mediums as of late and have learned so much in the trying, in the mistakes, in the mess. It's almost inverted now where I prefer trying new things and experimenting rather than sticking with what's familiar. Playing around with oil pastels again has led me to discover new techniques, idiosyncrasies of the medium, and traverse stylistic territory that I otherwise wouldn't attempt. I've noticed my artistic expression comes across differently with different mediums (sunny kabocha mentioned something similar when trying oil paints) and that's been really cool to pick up on. As if there are parts of us that only come out in response to certain mediums, it makes me intrigued to try out new things and discover those parts of myself that have been dormant. Speaking of, I have some sticker paper and color pencils that are currently calling my name, so we'll talk next time...

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Hope you have a lovely day and thanks for reading!

Vicki 🌬️