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111 (Patreon)

Published:
2020-07-12 05:00:01
Edited:
2020-07-18 23:23:27
Imported:
2020-09

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Content

Just adventurer things.

Comments

Anonymous

“Can we just go already?” said Elmwood. “We’ll be fine with six.” Elmwood was a Nature Mage, and he clearly taking pains to look the part. - remove the he before clearly I think.

Anonymous

I screeched as its fur caught fire, and the other rats hesitated long enough for Jaks to plant himself between the mages and the oncoming swarm. - It instead of I, I think.

Newguy Roy
>>40208362

Damnit, you're 3 minutes in front of me and keep getting the mistakes I find.

Newguy Roy

It took advantage of his unbalance and leapt at him /at him/,

Ziggy

-revolution and disbelief warring on her face. *revulsion

Pagemaster

Was there anyone else disappointed that Kettel didn't die? I will be honest. I was rooting for the monsters.

Anonymous

Thanks for the chapter! I enjoyed it.

Heraclitus

The chapter was well written, but it was everything I feared would happen. A chapter almost entirely dedicated to an unlikable and unnecessary character. Kettle acted like an overconfident moron, as always, fucked up, as always, and Rain had to rescue him, as always. Amazing. Maybe if it weren't a chapter a week I might be more amenable to these kinds of updates. Probably not since I really dislike the hothead, idiot trope, especially when it ends every time with Rain have to drop everything to save them.

Newguy Roy

I didn't vote on this one, because while I didn't dislike it, I didn't really like it either. Didn't really care for how Kettel almost killed himself. I guess I would've been satisfied if he'd been offscreened. Kinda interesting getting more info on how he sees the system, though.

wanderer117

Great chapter. Helps fill in some of the problems normal adventurers face that didn't come up for Rain.

Dragonkinn

Voted up. While not my favorite, showing that people are fucking stupid and reckless was well conveyed and providing low points will help make high points all the more gratifying.

Anonymous

Goodness Kettel, maybe some simple training is in order?? Learning how to fight stuff and training your body??

Andrew Gardner

Thanks for the chapter. Not sure if this is a typo or just Kettle's accent but "There’re monsters tha’ need burnin’ more then some asshole blood mage axe murderer or whatever tha depths Jaks is supposed to be." It should be than not then.

Randall Klatt

I'm in agreement with others. I do not like waiting an entire week to get a chapter about a silly side character. I understand that it helps build the world a little better, but there's zero plot advancement.

Matt
>>40209482

Rain’s expedition needs more awakened and I’m sure these grateful adventurers will bolster his group.

Chris

No more chapters dedicated to dumb side characters, please.

J03MAN

Revolution and disbelief->revulsion and disbelief I screeched -> it screeched

Ziggy

Typically I'm not a fan of side character chapters with no Rain POV, but I liked this one. Also wow they're all risky dumbasses. Kettel is level 5 and with only like 2 skills points spent. Jaks is probably 10ish. What's the first wall, again? I totally had a derp moment and didn't realize Mahria's search for the ice based class with respec accolades meant she's ALSO only level 5. Then the other three seem pretty weak, as well. So six weak bronzeplates going into a monster infested area, with no healer or backup, not even a full party. I think I liked the POV because it shows how generally reckless adventurers tend to be. And man are they.

Anonymous

Wasn’t the most satisfying chapter ever, but I really liked the glimpse into “normal” low-level adventuring

Randall Klatt
>>40208657

I'm very much in agreement. I support several authors on Patreon, but I'm contemplating dropping this one. There's one chapter a week, and I don't like having it wasted on a lame side character. I mostly skimmed this chapter because it did next to nothing to advance the plot.

Daoist

Voted down for Kettel :p

Valter Anunciação

very meh chapter. If I wanted random fantasy I wouldn't be here fuck kettel and actually write the interesting characters .

Gabriel

Well written chapter. I don't really like Kettle as a character but he makes sense and behaves appropriately for his back ground. I look forward to seeing how he grows but I would rather alt PoV chapters be from Amilah, TallHeart or someone not quite as... happy to endanger themselves and others. I do think this chapter is good to have as it adds useful things.

Anonymous

Wasn’t Kettel’s ignorance and stupidity already well established? Or is Kettel the new ‘Vain’ that Rain gets to sacrifice himself over and over for?

carebear90

With all the build up I was really looking forward to the "rescue by Rain" at the end. But then we have a fade out instead. Not really satisfying. It would all have been worth it if we'd got to see stupid Mahria eating her condescending attitude towards Rain after seing him freeze all the Lurkers with his aura. ^^

Anonymous

Having a week about a side character is not really interesting for a full chapter. Aside from that, I have made a Tv Tropes page for Delve. If anybody has the time, please provide some contribution towards this page, as I cannot summarize everything on my own. Link: https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Literature/Delve

Anonymous

I'll be honest. With Val already taking up the spot of a reckless daredevil, I don't see much of a point in introducing Kettel in the same role. At first I pegged him to be more of a hard-headed but loyal idiot that's willing to learn, even if he might struggle because of his nature. In addition to that, there's also Mahria being largely careless considering her background and extensive adventurer education she should've gone through, and Rain himself being a bit too gung-ho at times (even though his reasons are different and usually understandable). I do get the concept that in order to make characters realistic, they need to have their fair share of problems and shortcomings to overcome and grow (and it's working quite well in Rain's case), but the overall cast is starting to feel a bit like Ameliah's kindergarten, and I feel some characters are starting to show a distinct lack of redeemable features. So while this does makes the story more realistic, it's also not exactly fun to read those characters' PoV chapters, like in this case (at least for me). I just hope that this chapter will serve as a learning experience either for Kettel in order to grow, or for Rain (having to abandon someone who simply isn't willing to listen would be an interesting development for Rain's character). Anyway, thanks for the chapter :).

Anonymous

This chapter was interesting. I enjoyed seeing Kettel more. But it also worried me. Both in terms of plot progression and scene choice. Was this really necessary? Could it have been shown in a more interesting way, e.g. a series of quick sentence long snippets showing increasing mayhem, followed by Rain and Ameliah's arrival? There's a lot you want to show, and that's what makes this story entertaining. But for the sake of pacing and having a coherent plot, chapters like this make me worried that the story is losing focus, or that you're choosing to show scenes for reasons that could be shown in different and more efficient ways. What is the story you want to tell? I thought it was about a character Rain delving into himself, a world, and a system, whilst also delving into new friendships and connections to which he had closed himself before the isekai transfer. Now I'm not so sure. I know well the desire to show tonnes of cool stuff and new perspectives, but when those perspectives clutter the central motifs and flavours of your story, you lose plot momentum and boredom kicks in. Imagine GRRM randomly interspersed POV chapters of Joffrey being Joffrey in the first book. I would argue that those chapters would not add anything to the story, and would just weigh it down. It would even make certain mysteries less interesting. Hope this was helpful. Sorry for the lack of line breaks---on mobile the return key publishes the comment.

ZaA
>>40215020

At this point, I've mostly given up on giving any of my thoughts in the comments. If he reads them, he never takes any of them to mind, and seems to have an idea of where the story is going and isn't going to change that, no matter if that hurts his story or not. I think I've seen him reply to like.. 4 comments ever, and they were all "thanks" (or something along those lines) when someone pointed out a grammatical error. so... yeah. Hard agree, though

Thenais

poor Rain got friend-zoned in earlier chapter, and it shows :/

Adam Roundfield

I only have one real problem with this story. The better it is the shorter the chapter feels...

Big I

This whole chapter could have been shortened to just the part where Kettel wakes up after being saved.

Michael Hughes

I don't mind Kettle. He is very early in his build and Rain could help him become the ultimate fire mage just like Mahira was trying to become the ultimate Ice mage. Yes he is an idiot but a lot of people are idiots when they are young. Stories progress with character growth and not unchanging paragons. I do wish it was not all Kettle though. You could have had Rain's Pov inter spaced to build dramatic tension. See you next time.

Anonymous

A good chapter showcasing the average effectiveness of Noble/Commoner low-tier bronze plates. It would be nice to see Rain actually use the knowledge gained from spending several hundreds of thousands of EXP previewing skill tree to help these guys. Memory and strategy seem to be among Rain strongest character traits, so I'm sure he has some fearsomely synergistic builds floating around his brain.

Orion Dye

Wow I really liked this chapter. Really shows how low level adventurers act and gives some a good natural perspective from the native inhabitants of this world Rather than the distorted one from Rain. Good job! Be looking forward to the next one.

tibbish
>>40219761

I think he has tried with some of them and going by Kettle's references/thoughts it seems they think he is long winded at best and ignore him.

MagicWafflez

why are the thumbs so mean about this chapter? it's nice to see how a normal party works without rain being awesome all over it

Loipers

Much better than the last Kettel POV. I'm liking the setup for Rain to become a sort of reliable big brother for the inexperienced lower level people to rely on. Doing this slowly like this is much better than just dumping the whole cast of characters into their travels - there's no way all these arrogant upstarts would just accept his leadership, especially if they doubt his capability like Mahria does.

Craig

Could I get a TLDR of this chapter, please?

Anonymous

I do like Kettels perspective, need to see the idiot hit Gold plate.

Pyrefiend

Now that Kettel has seen how useless he is, even compared to other lvl 5's, I hope we can see growth from him. It's pretty frustrating when he refuses to learn literally anything from his mistakes.

Andrew

Thank you!

Anonymous

While this chapter is objectively interesting, with a mix of action and introducing characters who I'm assuming we will see more of in the future (and if we won't, then this chapter becomes rather irrelevant). However, the chapter also does too much telling that something happened rather than *showing.* There is a large tone shift in the first couple hour time skip (battered but confident for more fights to panicked) and the event that resulted in their injuries is barely mentioned. Really, it would have been best portrayed its own scene instead of happening offscreen to drive in the adventurers overconfidence, then going into the scene with the results of their actions.

Anonymous
>>40230866

The telling rather than showing again happens again with Rain's appearance. Instead of showing his (or Amelia's) perspective of rushing in to save people, we continue with the perspective of Kettel after he is revived. This scene is fine and a good way to end the Kettel POV, but again has a huge tone shift with little to no transition, and the chapter would again be likely better served with another scene in-between.

Kyle
>>40208865

I wish I could like this comment more than once. There's a lot of negative feedback coming down on this chapter and on Kettel but I think that it does a great job showing both what you described and helps flesh out a lot of personalities, introduce some new minor characters we'll likely be seeing later once the company moves out, and most importantly gets us some more Jaks screen time (I am really interested in Jaks and learning more about him, his build, and his background)

Anonymous

Not a super fan of side character chapters, but my real issue was that Rain for some reason has been blabbing about his suspicion about Rankin of screen. I mean really? And to Kettel of all people?

Anonymous
>>40235302

Eh, for all we know, Kettel just happened to be around and heard Rain grumbling about Rankin and saying "what's worse he probably skimming, the asshole" to someone else, and thought it made sense and ran with it. If you don't trust Kettel to be reliable enough to be told, you shouldn't trust his explanation of how he found out.

Anonymous

Based on past examples of how SS like to foreshadow, I'd say that dying changes a person's soul, and is somehow meaningful beyond having a cool story to tell the chicks.

Ole Halvorsen
>>40215953

I think you should read the new updated description of the series on royal road, it answers maybe some of your questions. Regarding this chapter I think it's a bit interesting because we might see 2-5 more people joining Rains party. Kettle and Mahria definitely is joining, Maybe also Jaks, seems like a lot more interesting person, I just don't see how his values overlap with what Rain is trying to build. there might also be some other interesting builds there like the nature mage was a bit interesting more of a support/cc character, the tank is totally uninterested as of yet for me and the girl version of the group also might be. anyway I think this is a good stage for Rain to meet back up with Mahria. Left by her mother, a mother that killed thousands and possible doomed everyone if not for Rain. She is now on her own. I've no doubt that she would never have joined had she not got the information about her mother. She might also have been given information about her last possible skill she needs for her class and that is making her not think 100% straith. I think this chapter might be good for both Mariah and Kettle both needing a reminder of how fragile the life of an adventure is. Anyways Mariahs days with her helicopter parent hanging over hear head is over, It will be interesting to see how she is treaded back into Rains group

Loipers

"Contribution: 1 in 100 Experience: None" I spy a 0 in kettel's character sheet.

Ziggy
>>40252360

How would he even see that without a 0? I wouldn't know how to convert it for readers.

Anonymous

I remember that Rain had that build full of passives, and on the other hand, Kettle isn't with the DKE anymore. So I suppose that it would be fine to offer him that build. If I recall correctly, the passivist build had some free points for utility skills? I mean, skills to give other ways to attack? Well, Kettle would already have 2 of those skills, one to attack from range, another to give him some extra punch when fighting at close range.

Anonymous

i wish the poll had a thumbs down option for the complete morons instead of the chapter itself, damn they stupid. Kettel's stupid contribution: 50%.

Mr R

An enjoyable chapter, but it felt like there wasn't enough of a focus on characters we already know. Hence a three way split following the perspective of Kettel, Mahria and Jaks would've been better for character development. We could catch glimpses of what went on between Mahria and Lavaro, seen just how warped Jaks must have become and their perspective on Rain and his goals. Plus Kettel is so open in expressing his views that we'd have lost little from viewing him from the outside.

Anonymous
>>40293922

This is a great coment. The capter didnt offer plot advancement but could offer a fresh perspective on relevant characters.

Eliot Blane

felt a little short

Anonymous

i know side stories are important but i really just want to see rain be overpower more. and I'm still dying to know what kind of ridiculous thing he did with his hyperbolic time chamber that we missed out on with the time skip a few chapters back.

Scesce Scesce
>>40410616

i would be happy with jjust a "less squishy for now" instead of overpower, he is total crap in fight, basically if he uses one of his skill he has 50% to kill himself along with his enemies.