BrahMira: I’d Rather Moo (Patreon)

By Candlestick’s Dilemma

Author's Notes: I actually wrote this back in October, intending it to get posted around Halloween, but then had an even better, more Mooooving piece. *cough* Sorry.

Contains: Misuse of a videogame universe I know nothing about. Two heads, one cow-like body. No taur (at least not in this chapter.) Multiarm. A milk filled udder. Having sex with a handsome male, with a butter face. Dual cocks. Arguing amongst yourselves. Poor choices with a Pip-Boy. Cow jokes hidden throughout.

Story:

In a world where nuclear power was far more common, a fallout of sorts had happened. A crow, or so most would call it, circled and landed on a tree, looking curiously at the figure snoring beneath its barren branches. Turning its head, it looked down and tried to decide if it was looking at a human, as the two legs, two arms, and overall shape would imply, or a cow, as the smell of milk, udder and horns suggested. It also had… two heads, covered in blonde hair. There might have been two horns to a head at some point, and if so, the two horns that had been between the two heads had clearly been cut away at some point.

Probably for the best, the crow reasoned. Two horns knocking together probably wouldn’t have ended well for either head. That it had two heads wasn’t unusual to the crow either, a lot of cows, or brahmin as it had heard the humans say, seemed to sport that particular mutation. Heck, it’s mate also sported two heads. Thinking of their partner, the crow gave one test flap of its wings and flew away, a single feather falling, brushing the skin of the sleeping figure below…

Mira wanted to shout. It always felt so… weird waking up. Instead she forced a yawn and a stretch, feeling her body agree to the shoulder movement.

Blinking her eyes a bit owlishly, she groaned before looking to her left at a face identical to her own. “I still don’t know what to make of you.”

“You’d think having our consciousness forcibly merged together into one mind every night and then ripped in half every morning would give you SLIGHTLY more insight into just who I am.” The other, identical woman in a voice that Mira tried to remind herself sounded just like her, despite it not sounding at all like she sounded like to herself in her own head, “or what I’m about.”

“Well I don’t know, maybe you’re out to get rid of me.” Mira grumbled, trying to sit up, but finding a tremendous weight on her chest. Looking down her nose, she was greeted by a pair of rather tight, extremely large, naked and tan pair of breasts, light blue veins visible letting her know just how full she was. “Fuck, we need milked.”

“On it.” Her mirror twin said, reaching into their pack and pulling out a pair of glass cups that they could fit over their nipples, connected to a pump still in the backpack. Together, the two women used both hands to take off one of the few adornments they still bothered with, a chain that ran from one nipple piercing to the other, a left over from when Mira’s body wasn’t quite this… odd. “Maybe we should start leaving this off at night.”

Mira blushed, thinking of how a few tugs on it at just the right point in her masturbation session had set her off like a firework. “Not a chance. And I’m still suspicious of you.”

“Get over it.” The identical woman rolled her eyes before digging into the pack. A hose and an old plastic jug came out. She glanced at it before turning her head to face Mira as well as she could. “Drink it or bottle it?”

“Bottle it.” Mira answered after a moment of fidgeting. She loved the taste of her own breast milk but… “The last time we drank it we ended up with an udder.”

“Oh, right.” Her twin said, reaching over and undoing a snap on Mira’s left hip, popping the side of the coveralls she’d fallen asleep in free. Mira did the same on the right hip and both her hands went to feel the huge udder she now had instead of a stomach. Not that she didn’t have a stomach, it just was hidden behind the large, soft, pink organ that seemed as happy to produce milk as her prodigious tits did. “Ooof, feels pretty full. We’re not going anywhere for a while.”

Mira sighed and layed back down, staring up at the sky, though with breasts her size the bottom third of her view was still obscured by big tan boobies. “So convince me you don't want to get rid of me?”

Her twin had pulled over Mira’s pipboy and was flipping through it one handed. She’d leveled up the day before and her and her twin hadn’t come to an agreement about what perk to take. She didn’t think her twin should have ANY say in the matter, but then, her twin thought the same thing about Mira.

“Get rid of you? Yes, I’d love to go our separate ways and have a body to myself.” Her twin absently answered, the loud clicking almost covering her words. “Do away with you? Hell no. I couldn’t do that anymore than I could…”

Mira heard her twin’s voice crack. When they’d left their vault, back when it was just Mira in a very normal, if busty and short, body with a Pip-Boy and a blue jumpsuit, there’d been five others. While she’d lost three to various dangers of the wasteland in what had once been a safe surface world, long since warped by the nuclear fallout, she and the other two, a young couple she’d known since birth, hadn’t ended their friendship the way she would have liked. The changes, the dangers, the horrors the three had seen, proved too much for the last remaining man of the group, and one night he’d used his sidearm to find his own escape from the wasteland.

His partner with the soft brown eyes had used its final shot the next morning, leaving Mira utterly alone.

But that had been almost two years, and many mutations ago, and Mira shook her head before looking across her shoulders to her twin, still flicking through pipboy options for perks they could take. One of the first she’d chosen, a week after they’d lost the last of their companions, had led Mira to choosing the ‘never alone’ perk. She’d thought it would boost her charisma or guarantee she always had a companion, which in a way it had, splitting her head into two identical ones with, though she was loathe to admit the annoying bitch beside her, had the exact same personality she did, ensured by their minds relinking every night.

It resulted in more arguments than she’d have liked, but she had to grudgingly admit that she was probably only alive today because she’d had someone with her to keep driving her forward, even if it was just herself.

“What are you looking for, then? Some perk to put us back in one head?” Mira groused, listening to the click, click click of the pip boy.

“Heck no. I like being the only one in my head, thank you.” Her twin answered, and Mira thought back to their dreams, when she was back to being singular, her mind sorting through two sets of memories and thoughts, blending them together and comparing them. “I’m looking for one that would get us separate bodies.”

Mira rolled her eyes. “Well, if you find one that’ll give us four arms so we can milk the udder two, I’d be fine with it.”

The clicking stopped.

“Are you fucking kidding me.” Her twin turned and looked at her. “We’re already a two headed freak because of your head being on my shoulders!”

“You mean MY shoulders!” Mira shouted back.

“We’re like, half cow or something!” A hand, the one on her twin’s side, smacked their sensitive udder. Rather than cause pain, it instead made the two tremble, almost ready to cum. Another perk they’d chosen while totally misunderstanding its use. “And we have to be careful that anything we eat is cooked or processed in some way or we might change more!”

Another perk they’d picked, and found themselves regretting after eating some brahmin meat that hadn't been cooked out of desperation, leaving them with the cow-like features they shared.

“And with all that, you want to pick a perk that’ll make us even FREAKIER!?”

“Go big or go home.” Mira snorted, though looked away from her twin. Home… would they ever accept a mutant like her now? Probably not.

“Well I-.” Whatever her twin had to say, which if Mira thought about it for half a second she could probably guess, was cut off by a loud roar.

The two heads looked at each other in shock across their shared double wide collarbone.

“A super mutant!”

“My gun, where’s my gun?” Mira couldn’t keep track of who was saying what, times like this she tended to be of ‘one mind’ anyway. Their hands searched together, yanking up a modified revolver with a rifle extension and a magazine loadout. Swinging it around to their right shoulder, Mira’s, she glanced down the sight in the way the roar had come from…

It was close, too close!

“Mira, we’ve got to-.” Mira started, wanting to kick herself for actually calling her twin by her own name. Before she could get anything out, a hand the size of a glazed ham grabbed both of the twins’ wrists and pinned the pair to the tree they’d been sleeping under, high enough in the air that their feet couldn’t quite reach the ground, a second pair of arms holding their hips tight against the tree’s bark.

The pair struggled, even trying to kick out at the super mutant, resulting only in sliding their coveralls further down their hips and tying their feet up. They did manage to knock his loincloth off, however.

Which is how the two headed woman knew it was a him.

“Lllllooook at that cock.” Mira found herself panting, and not just from the exertion she’d just gone through.

“Are you kidding me, it’s a mutant!” Her twin hissed between her teeth. “A super mutant!”

“Yeah, well so are we!” Mira couldn’t believe she was trying to rationalize this. “Most super mutants are androgenous, he’s clearly a HE!”

“Well I…” her twin bit her lip, looking the super mutant up and down. Other than a monstrous head, he did tick off a number of boxes…. Wide shoulders, powerful arms, abs for days… And it had been a long time since she had a partner who wasn’t grafted onto her shoulders. “Ok, but only if he’d rather do that then eat us, not both!”

It had taken a bit of negotiation, thankfully this was a super mutant who could talk passibly, and some heavy flirting on Mira and her twin’s part, they weren’t sure what he was into but they’d yet to meet a man who didn’t love a big pair of tits and they had that in plenty, but soon they were stretched out next to their pack again, biting their lips, as the large brute of a beast eased the first eight inches into their short, curvy body.

That’s when they were in for a second surprise. Apparently they weren’t the only one who was two headed, though with the super mutant it was his ‘lower’ head that had been duplicated.

The pair of women did an admiral job of accommodating their partner, and found him to be a rather gentle, and considerate lover, though they did try and tell themselves it was because of his nature rather than ‘trial and error’ which seemed a bit more likely.

Instead they focused on the absolute ravishing they were getting, loving feeling his rough hands milking their various nipples, both breasts and udder related. They happily were bucking against him as he was going balls deep within them, and even cleaned his cocks afterwards with their mouths, thrilling at being able to stretch both their throats with his cocks at once. They were overjoyed at getting to empty his balls with one last gluttonous spurt straight into their stomach. Or stomaches, they weren’t entirely sure how cow-like that part of them had become.

It took the better part of the day to truly exhaust him, and even Mira’s famous energy reserves were waning as the sun started to set. Deciding to chance it, they snuggled up to their supermutant lover, and fell asleep.

Waking up the next morning, Mira shot a look at her twin, the two trying to sort themselves out after yet another night of being a singular person, but she found it harder to really glower at her other head, as the mental merger had let her experience that sex from both of her points of view, and it had been pretty mind blowing.

They glanced around, her twin finding their mutant lover hunting a deer, him giving a wave with one hand when he noticed they were sitting up, the pair waving back with both hands before laying back down, folding their arms.

“Oh fuck.” Her twin said suddenly, shifting their shoulders. “Mira…”

Mira was about to tease her about using her name, she was the original after all, no matter what her twin said, but something felt… off. “Yeah?”

“Remember the… four armed thing?”

They glanced at the Pip-Boy, it was still unchosen so it hadn’t been the work of a perk. Instead it was…

“The cum.” They said together, double face palming with all four hands, two to a face. “Aw, fuck.”

“Well.” Their supermutant lover said as he came back to them, dropping the deer carcass next to the fire he’d built up at some point. “I’m a little tired, but sure. After Breakfast.”

The two headed cowgirl looked at herself, laughed, and hugged him around the waist, turning their heads to kiss each other as he gently patted them on the heads, and held them a bit closer to him.

~Fallout Fin