The Ballad of Gluttony - Sloth (Patreon)

(This is a continuation of something I was doing way back in 2019 and just never ended up completing.  Here are the intro and the entries for Envy, Wrath, Greed, and Lust.)

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SLOTH enjoyed lounging in front of a screen

There was scarcely a program that she hadn’t seen

And yet she was no trivial foe to defeat -

For she was too lazy to get up and eat.

Gluttony pondered. Gluttony schemed.

Gluttony founded a network which streamed

A new baking show with a magical twist—

Cooking dishes you literally couldn’t resist.

When a dish was completed up there on the show

It would shimmer and vanish, and where did it go?

Right into the mouths of the viewers out there

Who could passively eat while they passively stare.

Now Sloth had a new show to mindlessly follow

And she sucked it all down with a long, sleepy swallow.

Twenty episodes later and crammed beyond reason

She’d given new meaning to bingeing a season.

Though Sloth is now bursting right out of her flannel

She won’t go to the effort of changing the channel.

And her slothful commitment can only improve

For poor sleepy Sloth is now too stuffed to move.