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Half in the Bag: Mandy and The Predator (Patreon)

Published:
2018-09-20 12:41:50
Imported:
2021-03

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Half in the Bag Episode 153: Mandy and The Predator

Look out! It's the Predator! He's here to cut and slash his movie into incoherence!! Mike and Jay also saw a good movie as well.

Comments

Anonymous

Is this another diss track?

Steven Simmons

100% agree with everything. The Predator feels like a chopped and screwed version of an already terrible film.

Anonymous

Predator on Halloween, as requested. <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_bb3_noQbEg" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_bb3_noQbEg</a> :)

Anonymous

The Predator could have been good, but damn it's just meh.

Anonymous

Hooray!

Marvin Falz

That ending is great!

Vladdy Bladdy

'The Predator' is the stupidest movie ever made. Omg, what a shitshow. It’s not funny, it has comedic moments, and some quips made me chuckle, but it felt like a suicide squad broad type of humour, like, ha ha isn’t it funny how the guy swears, ha ha the kid says fuck isn’t that edgy. The gore was just cartoony and so over the top that I couldn’t take it seriously. That spear wire kill was something out of an Itchy and scratchy show. It’s not meaty or impactful, might as well not have been there. The action was just mediocre, and bad at times/(On the level of APV requiem, but at least that movie had more practical effects), the movie was 80% people firing their guns at no avail in the dark forest, 15% predators smacking people like the Incredible Hulk with no finesse, and 5% people shooting guns in the dark that now do damage for some reason. The story is just terrible. What movie did I watch? Independence Day? Gremlins 2? A kids movie from the 80’s ? Feels like a predator parody. No horror elements, and not a single suspenseful moment in the entire film. But plenty of awful plot holes, incredible conveniences and just wtf moments. Why didn’t the Logan guy just turn invisible at the start and simply walked away? Why did he consume an ALIEN PIECE OF TECHNOLOGY with no second thought of consideration, that shit probably gave him 30 types of cancer, jfc. Why did the Area 51 guys were NOT monitoring captured predator's vitals, and didn’t secure him better? Just fucking strap him with titanium bars and just keep pumping him sedatives, you literally had ONE JOB! Why did the predogs turn on it’s master and started helping humans FOR NO REASON? Actually it had less than no reason, it had negative reason, cause they shot at it, wtf was that? It hurts my brain trying to comprehend the logic structure behind their existence in this movie except for providing main characters with deus ex grenada. Why are some characters acting so retarded by jumping on moving spaceships or trucks with no experience or proper plan? Like the science lady acting like a commando, wtf? And the thing that pisses me off the most is the damage to the lore of predators. Like, even AVP1 represented them better and true to the source material. This movie completely changes the motivation of the first predators into something so dumb and generic and specific. Like, oh gooooood, there’s no mystery anymore to their culture or sport hunting with honor and code, cause turns out they were after A U T I S T I C. S P I N E. F L U I D S, why? Cause they wanna be 10 feet tall instead of 8 feet tall? Didn’t we already see this crap in Predators, with predogs as well? ITS NOT INTERESTING! Having likable and compelling characters being underequipped and fighting a Force way more Advanced than them with no expository explanation about their entire ducking backstory and motivation, that’s just basically toying with them until one biggest badass just barely outwits it - THATS WHATS INTERESTING! Predators in this movie were acting not like predators, but like the Incredible Hulk, just no regard for stealth or intimidation or cunning or sneaking, they just waltz right into every single group of people and kill everybody whose name is not on the movie poster. What a fucking joke, and the way they killed classic predator is just pathetic, wasn’t even a fight, it was filmed like an 18 year old picking on a kindergarten baby. it could have been a comedic scene from naked gun or something, just complete humiliation. Don’t even get me started on the assburgers kid with Hollywood autism powers who is smarter than scientists and is being bullied by stock bullies from a Steven king book and kills a man (indirectly) and has no second thoughts about it, or the terrible cgi on the hulk predator, or how every single Loony character was basically Shane Black character from the original and you didn’t care for anybody, EXCEPT for the classic who predator. But special mention goes to that FUCKING AWFUL scene when the hulk predator speaks human and explains that he’s going to kill people and gives them a head star just ultimately shows that Shane Black doesn’t understand the property that he was involved with from the start. Did he even WATCH THE MOVIE HE WAS IN IN '87?! You DIDNT NEED all the exposition scenes in the original for audiences to get suspenseful or just ‘get’ the point of the movie. Just awful, awful writing. And that ending. That FUCKING ending. Omfg. That ending made me embarrassed for being a predator fan. I don’t think there was literally anything dumber that they could have put in that pod. Literally anything else would have been better. Put Arnold in it, a xenomorph, a terminator, a gremlin, idc, but don’t put an iron man predator suit for humans with metal dreadlocks in it with terrible, oversized cgi cannons, with the boring main character going: ‘Ye, that’s my suit’. Nah mate, that ain’t your suit, cause ain’t nobody making a sequel for this bloody piece of shit, cause NOBODY WANTS TO SEE THAT! That’s not what the predator is about!

Robert Daniel Pickard

At about the 28 min mark of episode 303 of the Harmontown podcast (version w/o advertisements) there is a great riff about how badly Predator has aged as a movie monster. Thermal vision isn't impressive when our telephones have night-vision.

Anonymous

neat to see Jay so excited to talk about a movie. Can't remember the last time we saw that. One of the cameras is out of focus though and it's distracting.,

Anonymous

Spoiler / I suspect they used the bag to burn Mandy because it thematically connected to the starling story, which does help Jay’s theory of her footprint being present throughout.

Anonymous

Why did they make the poster look like the Blacked logo? Was it to symbolize how Shane Black fucked the franchise?

Anonymous

I always enjoy the Jay / weird shit episodes. Bring it

Anonymous

I must have missed an episode somewhere - what are all of those dvd cases scattered around the place? Can't quite tell what movie it is.

Anonymous

I would love to hear you guys talk about beyond the black rainbow, Mandy’s precursor in a way.