Who Let This Spider Cook?! Ch.26 (Patreon)

— Pero —

There was something completely soul-draining about seeing a group of people you’ve grown close to over the years get completely eviscerated by a fucking nuke! The last time Pero had been so confused and worried in his entire life was when his parents died and left him and Buku behind to take care of themselves.

And this was, for all intents and purposes, a close second. 

They weren’t even halfway into this boss fight, and so many of their members had died in that attack. From what they knew about this boss, the world items he used to combat the raiders would grow stronger and stronger as he got lower in health. 

If his first attack had wiped out nearly a fifth of their players, what would the second do?

They already knew the answer to that and knew they had to be very careful going forward. 

They’d have to continue on without their fallen friends to make history and beat this game. 

“Brother!” Buku shouted from below. “Lay pressure on it!” 

Pero didn’t need to be told twice. He flew a bit higher up and drew a few arrows. Pulling back his bow, he launched a volley of fire arrows at the massive dragon. 

[Maliketh, The True World Eater (Lvl ???)]

[Rank: Conqueror of Worlds]

[- 7,000 HP]

[HP: ?,???,???/?,???,???]

This thing was still in the millions of HP and they had no idea how to go about lowering it! 

But if there was one thing Pero knew, it was that his guild had been through hell and back, and without fail, they always won. 

What does an overpowered dragon final boss have on an army of ten thousand? 

Fucking nothing. 

They would win, here and now, or Pero would give up lolis forever! 

And Yggdrasil be damned, he was not giving up his lollipops! 

— Kakuei —

“RAAAHHHHHHHH!” 

I watched as Pero shot arrow after arrow, all while shouting. I was glad he was motivated…but this was a little too much. 

I gave Buku a sideways glance, and for a moment her head turned to me before quickly turning away. So she didn’t want to talk to me even in a situation like this. That’s fine; we have work to do anyway. 

“Momo!” I shouted, looking her way. “Rally the magic casters and prepare a synchronized attack. We’re taking this boss out of seven figures!” 

“Right!” Momonga nodded, signaling the magic casters. 

“Ulbert, coordinate the healers. Keep us buffed. Touch Me, and all close-ranged fighters, you’re all with me!” 

‘“RAAAAHHHHHHH!”” 

I smiled internally at their battle cry. It didn’t matter that we lost members in this raid. We’d bring this fucker home for Hell’s Paradise! 

I raised my stick high into the air and grinned. “With me!” 

As we sprinted forward, the massive dragon didn’t remain stationary. His claws sharpened and he swung at us at an incredible speed—but not fast enough. 

Thanks to the buffs we were given, we all jumped over the massive claw and closed in on the dragon. Upon reaching it, we unleashed a barrage of attacks on it. 

[Maliketh, The True World Eater (Lvl ???)]

[Rank: Conqueror of Worlds]

[- 92,000 HP]

[HP: ?,???,???/?,???,???]

“GRAAAAAAHHHHH!” The dragon roared in anger. 

“It’s readying another attack!” I shouted, looking back toward the guild. The dragon slammed down on the ground hard, and the earth beneath us started vibrating. 

Something told me this battle was about to go bad fast. 

“Everyone, off the ground!” I ordered with a hasty shout and jumped into the air as high as I could. 

Many guild members followed my order, but too many were too slow. 

“WHA-” 

BOOM

From the ground, giant black roots erupted and reached the heavens at a speed faster than I could track. 

I watched as so many of the guild members were pierced and one shot by the attack. 

[Guild Member: TemporalAce has been slain.]

[Guild Member: Tabula Smargina has been slain.]

[Guild Member: Ladyboy has been slain.]

[Guild Member: Lux has been slain.]

[Guild Member: iMbEtTeR has been slain.]

[Guild Member: Yamaiko has been slain.]

[Guild Member: Coup De Grâce has been slain.]

[Guild Member: El Hermano has been slain.]

[Guild Member: Shizyuutensuzaku has been slain.]

[Guild Member: Ankoro Mocchi Mochi has been slain.]

[Guild Member: has been slain.]

[Guild Member: Tigris Euphrates has been slain.]

[Guild Member: Suratan has been slain.]

[Guild Member: Nearata has been slain.]

[Guild Member: Genjiro has been slain.]

[Guild Member: erxtionlover73 has been slain.]

[Guild Member: Ronavan Donovan has been slain.]

[Guild Member: Black Destroyer has been slain.]

I couldn’t even spend time counting how many of us we just lost, but with the massive ping of names, I knew it was a lot. 

So basically, we are fucked. 

“GRAAAAAHHHHHHHH!” 

“Nuke!” Pero shouted, flying higher into the air. 

Immediately after landing, we jumped out of the way to avoid the massive nuclear attack the boss unleashed at us—this time, we managed to get away without any loss of players. 

A grim frown split my lips at that thought. Without any loss of players. Never in all of our time playing Yggdrasil have we lost even half the numbers we lost today, and I don’t think we are even halfway through this raid!

It’s not looking good, that’s for sure. 

“Kakuei, what are we going to do?!” Joni asked from beside me as we stared at the massive dragon that was currently flying around the roots it created. Likely recharging it’s MP-

Because, of course, it can recharge its MP. 

“I’m going to be honest Joni…” I said, looking toward the group of guild members gathered around us. “I have no fucking idea.” 

“What do you mean you have “no fucking idea?!” Pero shouted as if I said something completely unbelievable. 

“Who do you think I am? Einstein? Napoleon? I got no fucking clue man. Half our guild just got wiped in a single attack and we have less players now than we started with. What the fuck am I supposed to say?!” 

“GRAAAAAAHHHHH!” 

“Of course it’s coming back! We’re so fucked!” 

“Fear not, my brave friends!” Touch Me stabbed his blade into the earth and looked at us. “For this is a fight we are destined to win. Kakuei, what was it you said after we successfully raided Asgard?” 

“...” I blinked, tilting my head toward the sky to think back. 

I said a lot…what specific moment is he talking about? 

“You said: Throughout Yggdrasil and all the realms beyond, we alone are the Supreme Ones. So how can we lose here? It’s impossible! Justice will prevail! Stand proud Hell’s Paradise; we are strong!” 

Touch Me’s words left me quiet as I thought back on that moment. He was right. We’re the strongest fucking guild in the game. If we can’t beat this boss, nobody can! It’s up to us, because we are supreme!

“Holy shit, it’s attacking again!” Pero shouted and on cue, we saw the dragon slam its massive claw on the ground again. All of my motivation quickly zapped as I shouted three words. 

“Oh shit, move!” 

Again we jumped into the air, avoiding the attack. This fight was so over unless we started doing a lot of damage…now. 

“Touch Me, Ulbert, Joni, Momo, Vampira. I need you all with me; launch your strongest attacks, use all your justice stamps if need be; I don’t give a fuck we’re taking this goddamn overpowered fuck of a boss down now!” 

“That’s not smart, Kakuei!” Bellriver argued. “If we do that now, we’ll leave ourselves open when the boss starts unleashing more powerful attacks. 

“You’re right.” I nodded with gritted teeth. “But what choice do we have?! If we continue at this pace, our forces will dwindle down to nothing. The World Eater is regenerating MP at an insane rate, and I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s also regenerating HP!” 

Everyone stilled at my words.

“If that’s true, Kakuei is right, it needs to die now.” Ulbert declared, leaving no more room for argument. 

“I will come with you all, master.” Nishikienrai said with absolute determination. 

“Good, we can use you. Hit it with a dimensional slash, we’re taking this thing down. Disasters, follow up our attack!” I pointed the stick at the dragon and rushed forward with the World Champions following me into the fight of our lives. The dragon was still in the seven digits. We needed to make progress, here and now. 

The massive maw of the dragon opened and within it were purple flames. 

“It’s launching a breath attack!” Joni called out the obvious.

“We’re pushing through!” I ordered suddenly feeling a boost of speed and power fill me. I gave a quick glance back at Momonga who gave me a slight encouraging nod. 

I gotta marry that girl. 

“Let’s go!” We pushed forward and when the dragon launched the breath attack, we easily side stepped it with our enhanced physicals. Now, we were within striking distance. 

I sacrificed 50 of my justice stamps without the blink of an eye and i knew the others were doing the same. All of us winded back our weapons and announced our attack to the beast we were about to slay!

““DIMENSIONAL SLASH!””

Our attacks collided with the durable scales of the World Eater who roared in pain. 

[Maliketh, The True World Eater (Lvl ???)]

[Rank: Conqueror of Worlds]

[- 797,000 HP]

[HP: ???,???/?,???,???]

Finally in the six digits! We can do this, we can win!

“GRAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!” 

The dragon’s body began to radiate a dark purple miasmic aura that looked like it would be a pain to touch. 

“My HP is decreasing!” Pero shouted, alarmed by the sudden downward ticking of his HP. 

“It must be a new skill, we gotta get some distance, launch the Castastrophe’s now!” I ordered and Momo, Ulbert, and Pero launched three massive nukes at the dragon which struck true against its miasma-covered body. 

[Maliketh, The True World Eater (Lvl ???)]

[Rank: Conqueror of Worlds]

[- 264,000 HP]

[HP: ???,???/?,???,???]

Now…now was our chance! 

“It’s on its last legs! It can’t have any more than 750k HP; we can beat it now!” I raised my stick into the air in an attempt to motivate the surviving members. 

It worked as they all seemed deadly locked in on the dragon, who was slowly killing anyone too close to it. 

That aura was a problem, but we don’t have an answer for it. 

It takes about 1k HP per second, which isn’t much in short bursts, but prolonged exposure would be a death sentence. 

So, really, there was only one thing we could do…

“Everyone group up and hit it til it dies!” 

““RAAAHHHHH!””

— Chapter End —

Author’s Note: One more chapter of this boss fight and then we can move on. Writing this boss fight is kinda hard, I won’t lie. Maybe it’s because I’ve never actually engaged in a boss fight with my friends or anything like that to have experience to draw on. Still, honestly, I’m just looking forward to writing the end of Yggdrasil and the beginning of Tensura.