Podiatric Health (Patreon)

Fear not, ladies and germs. While it is not entirely uncommon for days to pass without me ever actually laying eyes on them, I have been informed that my feet are, in fact, in excellent condition, and that there’s no cause for concern.

Well, I mean, at least my left one is, if this picture is to be believed. Haven’t the foggiest where my right one might be…

Best case scenario, it’s being eclipsed by Olga. Worst case scenario, it’s just… run off again.

(Please give me only one bonus point for that extremely, extremely loose pun.)