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"So... Does Arie-, Lady Ariel need anything in specific?" I ask Fitz as we walk. I should probably address the Princess with the extra lady thing, I have no idea how I'm supposed to behave around royalty though... Maybe I should be saying your majesty or something?

The elf shakes her head. "Um... Not really. I think... she just wants to chat with you." Well, I do have to tell her about my engagement. "By the way... You don't need to bring your bodyguard with you. Luke and I are more than e-enough for protection..." I doubt that.

Mostly because if Ariel decides to pull out a knife on me, you will probably be too stunned to stop her. Actually you're my soulmate too, so it might be up to one desperate Luke to stop me... And that guy just doesn't look that strong, though it might be because I train with Eris, who is Eris.

Thankfully I doubt it will come to that. I haven't spent much time at all with Ariel and Fitz after all, so whatever love they may have felt has probably mostly faded away. A good thing really, considering my recent track record of fuck ups.

And so, I go to answer Fitz, but to my surprise Darkness does so for me. "Sorry, but I don't feel comfortable letting my master's safety upon the hands of people I barely know... Besides, to ask a man to leave his bodyguard is suspicious. No offense." W-wow, you said all of that with a serious face...

And you also brought a good point, why even ask for my bodyguard to leave in the first place? Fitz tries to answer that, though she is stuttering. "W-well... no offense taken! Yeah!" Actually she doesn't. Instead she completely dodges Darkness' accusation.

Yeah, there's definitely something going on here. I just have to figure out what... Is this some sort of revenge coming from Ariel? Nah, I don't think so. First because she seems like a mostly pure innocent girl...

And most importantly, because I have a past record of rejecting her invitations. Even if Ariel did turn out to be some scheming murderer, surely she would have come up with a plot better than inviting me to a tea party I probably won't agree with?

Damn it, now I'm beginning to have a headache, and so I can't help, but let out a sigh. "Fitz, are you sure there are no ulterior motives behind this...?" I will give her a second chance to answer honestly.

That's because elves are sacred and beautiful beings of course, and Fitz proves that with a blush. "Um... I think... I think..." Ah, her brain has melted. Please work hard Senpai, and remember that you are supposed to be the calm and collected Silent Fitz!

If nothing else, seeing an elf lose composure is making me feel better. Ah, if I ever try for the harem route again, I want an elf wife... No that I will be aiming for the harem route any time soon of course. I didn't learn my lesson... I mean, I learned my lesson. Yeah.

Fitz takes a deep breath and regains her focus. "I think she wants to spend some time with you. Alone. That's all really..." Ah, that is plausible of course, but it's also very scary, seeing as I am an engaged man.

Not that she knows that of course, so I might as well kill that idea. "Fitz... I have something to confess to you..." Maybe Fitz will call me an asshole who needs to leave and I will never even need to confront Ariel.

Darkness gasps, shock clear on her face. "You're confessing to another!? After Megumin just rejected you!?" W-what!? You heard our talk!? But we asked you to leave...! Geez, I should have expected you would peep...

But now Fitz has basically jumped in place, stopping her walk. "C-confess...!?" Her face is scarlet yet again... elves are dangerous. Still, please remember that you have something going on with Rudeus... Or at least Rudeus thinks that.

Though I imagine whatever feelings she has for him would quickly die out if learned about the reincarnation thing... Or maybe they wouldn't. Elves are supposedly very long lived, so maybe she wouldn't even bat an eye.

But enough about Rudeus, I have to clear something up. "It's not a romantic confession or whatever. I'm just saying that... that..." Geez, I don't wanna sound like a jerk, but... "If Lady Ariel has any romantic interests towards me she should give up. I'm a taken man." Yeah, I definitely sounded like a jerk just now.

And a arrogant jerk at that, one who is seemingly assuming a princess is into him... Well, Ariel didn't exactly hide her affections, but she also never confirmed them either, so I probably sounded cocky as hell just now...

For a few moments Fitz doesn't respond, which probably means I messed up again. Thankfully though, after a few seconds she smiles. "Oh! We at the Student Council are all aware that you are in a relationship!" Good...?

She continues, clapping her hands together. "This is just... a little friend get together! Lady Ariel, Luke and I just want to get to know the man who defeated Badigadi more!" But didn't you say Ariel wanted to spend some time with me alone?

Ah, I get it. She's awkwardly changing the purpose of our little meeting, and I definitely appreciate her efforts. Elves really are the best and most greatest creatures to ever live...! Man, I might have a problem.

I smile back to her. "Well, if it's just that then I don't mind. I actually... even have some good news to share with everyone." Hopefully I can make some friends and actually get a real congratulations for my marriage for once.

Lalatina interjects. "And I hope this little friendly meeting will have a seat in the table for me?" She walks closer to me as she says that. It actually surprises me that she's taking her bodyguard job this seriously, but it's a good type of surprise.

Fitz fakes a cough. "Ah, yes, of course!" And then she starts walking again, as we trail her from behind. A little bit of time passes, but we eventually reach the Student Council's room, and Fitz opens it without hesitation.

The elf waves at her friends. "I-I'm back...! And I brought our guest with us!" Guests in this case, please don't ignore Lalatina, even if she does like it. Though now that I look into the room... I see that they set up a little table.

A table with two chairs, one for Ariel and one presumably for me. Yeah, this was never meant to become a party of multiple people, and I imagine originally the Princess was gonna find some way of kicking out Fitz and Luke too...

But as we enter the room, Ariel's face lights up. "You accepted my invitation Lord Subaru...!" And then that happiness dies. "And you also brought your... concubine." I can tell she was trying to say sex slave in the most polite way imaginable.

I smile towards her as Darkness awkwardly waves. "Yeah... Lalatina has been acting as my bodyguard recently. Anyways, it's nice to see that you're in good health." I then look at Luke. "The same goes for you of course." He smirks in return.

Ariel clears her throat. "Thank you Lord Subaru... But to think you of all people would need a bodyguard... aren't you just being a bit paranoid?" Don't talk like I'm super strong or anything... Urgh, don't tell me you believe in the Badigadi rumors.

I'm probably the weakest guy in the academy, and I have quite literally never landed a blow on Eris... According to her normally it takes around five years for someone to reach Intermediate-Rank, but since I'm practicing with two styles it will probably take even longer.

I awkwardly scratch my cheek, embarrassment clear on my face. "Sorry to say, but I'm nowhere near as strong as you think I am. And I have pissed off a bunch of people recently, so..." It's a good idea to rely on Darkness.

Ariel pouts, but still nods. "I find hard to believe you're not strong Lord Subaru, but very well, please tell me all your troubles over tea!" Her face is back to a smile at the end. "Oh, and Luke, please be a dear and bring more chairs." Hey, Fitz is free too, ya know?

Luke nods. "On it." He begins searching around the room for more chairs, as expected of the Student Council room where there are more than two students... there are more than two chairs as well.

As he begins putting them next to the table, I sit down on the chair that was prepared for me. "Honestly, I don't get why you guys think I'm strong in the first place... I'm Beginner-Ranked in everything I pratice you know?" Not true, I'm God-Ranked in handling Eris in bed! A feat far more impressive than mere swordsmanship!

Ariel tilts her head. "Oh my... Then how did the Demon King lose?" Calling what happened to him a loss is a stretch. He looked at me, decided I was ugly and ran for the hills... I'm convinced he was just looking for an excuse to not fight Megumin.

Now that all chairs are in place, Luke sits down as well. "Gotta say, I'm curious too... By the way man, don't call it Beginner-Rank... Call it, Elementary-Ranked, it sounds better." Both of them are just ways of saying I suck, so I don't care.

Darkness and Fitz sit down as well, completely surrounding this little table with people... Though we don't actually have cups for everyone. That's probably gonna get awkward, but whatever.

I shouldn't focus on that right now, I should actually answer their question. "First of all, I didn't fight the Demon King... He just sort of left, I guess. What are the rumor mills even saying about me?" Probably something about how I'm an awful lolicon, if Megumin decided to continue with her plan.

Ariel hums. "Well, there are so many... Many of them however, simply say that you completely and utterly destroyed Badigadi with magic that made Quagmire look like an infant." I wish, sadly I can't match up to him.

I snort. "Yeah, right. I basically am not even a mage... If you want to look at someone who could fight Badigadi..." I point at Lalatina. "Then she's your gal, she's the super scary Water Emperor here after all." Two whole ranks above Eris...

That isn't to say ranks are everything of course. Eris has explained to me at this point that for example, even if there were multiple Sword Emperors with Sword God strength around, there can be only one taking that title.

My bodyguard blushes. "I... I could probably hold off the Demon King, but saying I could fight him might be a bit of a stretch!" Just take the compliment. Besides, your party has defeated multiple Demon Generals at this point.

Everyone seems shocked by her declaration, and Luke is the first one to make a comment. "You're... Emperor-Ranked? For real?" There's disbelief in his voice, even though Darkness is knows world wide as a heroine.

The crusader awkwardly looks away. "Y-yeah... I even trained with the Water God a bit when I was young, but... she ended up giving up on me. I have a... problem I can't get rid off." Eh, what does she know? You're just one rank below her anyways.

Luke whistles. "Geez, she must be strict, if even someone as well known as you ended not being enough." For some reason Lalatina is now trembling. Is the praise really making her this embarrassed?

Ariel giggles. "Well, whatever reasons the Water Goddess must have had, you're amazing nonetheless Darkness... The type of woman of who could become a high ranking knight in whatever country you decid to serve, not that you would need to do that of course, considering your status as a high ranking noble." Her question is clear.

If you're an amazing swordswoman, one who got personal training from one of the best swordswomen in the world, while also being a noble... Why the hell are you the sex slave of some Beginner-Ranked dude? The answer is that Lalatina is a weirdo of course, but Ariel must be looking for something more.

Before Darkness can say anything, the Princess continues. "Still, I have now learned why Badigadi ran from you Lord Subaru. It seems you possess a important quality of a king." I do!? "The ability to attract amazing allies..." I...

She starts serving up tea, not even commenting on the fact that there aren't enough cups... Or on the fact that princess shouldn't be serving tea in the first place. "The Mad Dog Eris... A Water Emperor... To have these two as lovers is amazing. Your military strength might rival that of a small country." For real!?

Nah, she's probably exaggerating. For example, I know Eris amazingly fast, but even she would tire out eventually... That said, I will admit that my fiancee and my sex slave are crazy strong. Which just makes the fact that I'm so weak even more embarassing.

Fitz nods. "Y-yeah, and... I know Rudeus has personally complimented Eris too." Is his acknowledgment worth that much? I guess he does have a cool nickname, and he has fought Badigadi before. Like... in an actual fight.

I awkwardly scratch my cheek. "Well, I don't think I did anything deserving of praise, I just found... really good allies." I take a sip of my tea. "Anyways, has anything interesting happened recently?" A princess has gotta have some good gossip. Besides, I want to talk about the interesting thing that has happened to me.

To my surprise though, Fitz takes the lead. "Well... I went with a picnic with Rudy... Rudeus recently. It was nice." Ah, I heard about that just today... But why do you sound so strangely sad when you say it?

And then she continues. "We actually watched the stars together..." Oh, he's using my thing! "Rudeus grew up to be an amazing person..." Rudeus has grown up two times, this dude has better be at least decent by now...! The worst part is that I know that he isn't.

She said something interesting though, so I can't help, but raise a questioning eyebrow. "Grew up...? Did you know him when you two were kids or something?" Well, Rudeus wasn't, sort of. Also, maybe Fitz wasn't either, since she's an elf.

A tense silence enters the room. I have a feeling I just said something I shouldn't have... Maybe I should change my name to Mess, because I seemingly cannot do anything right, no matter how much I try.

Thankfully though, a smile slowly appears on the elf's face. "Yeah, I knew him when I was a child..." Oh, the elf doesn't hate me, thank Goderis... Wait a minute, does that mean you're Rudeus' plan B? No way right? There's no way he had an Eris two!

Luke interjects, his face is filled with concern. "You're gonna tell him? For real Fitz?" Ah, so this was supposed to be some sort of secret... "At least discuss things with Lady Ariel first..." I can only apologize for stepping on a landmine.

The Princess waves him off. "It's fine Luke. Lord Subaru has clearly figured out Fitz's gender, and that's the most important part here anyways..." A curious look appears on her face. "Even if I'm wondering how you did it Lord Subaru..." Because no guy is that cute.

I sigh. "Isn't it obvious...? Fitz just looks really womanly, so there's no way I would confuse her for anything else." I actually was a bit confused at the beginning, but that was mostly out of denial.

I did not need to be hit with the power of an elf's existence while my girlfriend was confronting her now ex-boyfriend. Of all possible first meetings that had to be the worst one in history.

Fitz's face goes completely red. "W-womanly!? That's...!" Oops, I shouldn't have said something like that to a soulmate of mine. "N-no one has ever said anything like that to me before...!" Not even Rudeus...? He is clearly after you.

Which brings a interesting question... Should I intervene in this relationship? Assuming they really did meet as children? Probably not. At this point Fitz is an adult, by this world's standards at least. Also Cuckmire will literally kill me.

Luke snorts. "There's a reason no one has said that before." Eh? Dude, what the hell? "Subaru here is making stuff up, as a man I can confidently say you have no charm at all." And now the elf look depressed, even her ears have dropped.

Darkness mutters silently. "No hesitation... this man must be Kazuma's twin..." Sadly I cannot hear what my sex slave is saying. Mostly because all of my senses are now being overwhelmed with utter rage.

I have to use all of my willpower to not land a punch on Luke. "Man, you have awful taste. If I wasn't already dating Eris, then I would have definitely tried for cutest girl ever Fitz over here!" How does this man dare to insult an elf!? Heresy!

While Fitz sputters, a blessed image to be sure, Luke sighs. "Really? Looking at Eris that's hard to believe. Comparing the two is like comparing... it's like comparing the Divine Dragon Volcanica to a common Earth Dragon." Hydrogen bomb versus coughing baby!?

My eye twitches. "Well, here we can clearly see why I am the one dating Eris and not you. If a man can't recognize a beautiful gem, he certainly doesn't deserve another equally beautiful one!" I will murder this man if necessary.

Luke pouts, it actually sort of looks creepy with his handsome face. "W-whatever, it's not like I'm interested in your girlfriend or whatever." It's clear that I have won our battle. I used the legendary power of calling someone single.

Darkness laughs. "Subaru... Eris might end your life by the end of tonight." Ah, thanks for warning me of the danger bodyguard. Ah! You're totally right...! I need to stop giving my damn soulmates compliments.

A blushing Fitz looks down. "I hope she doesn't kill you Subaru..." Thanks...? "What you just said was really, really nice..." I'm just glad my simpery for elves is making an elf happy! Though I should tone it down, lest I become a creep.

Ariel's eye is twitching. "Yes Lord Subaru, you are quite the gentleman..." Wow, she sounds pissed off. "But now Fitz, why don't you tell us your story?" Right, I got so distracted thinking about Fitz, that I completely forgot about Fitz!

The Princess is glaring at her own friend. "I bet Lord Subaru is dying to hear about how close you are to Lord Rudeus..." I feel like... I feel like telling you about my engagement is not gonna go smoothly...

Fitz scratches her cheek, and slowly raises a hand towards her glasses. "F-first of all, my name isn't Fitz. I have to use a fake one, and keep my gender a secret due to a variety of reasons... My real name is Sylphiette." She takes off her sun glasses.

Her beautiful red eyes lock onto mine. "But you can call me Sylphie when we are in private Subaru!" I nod. That's indeed a cute nickname worthy of an elf. "I... I'm actually a victim of the Metastasis Event..." Oh, that has to be horrible.

Being teleported to somewhere random... I had the same thing happen to me of course, but the Love God at least had the decency to teleport me somewhere safe. I can see why the scars of such a horrible even are still fresh in the memorial of so many people.

The elf continues, a smile on her face. "That's when I met Lady Ariel and stuff... But before that, I used to live in the same village as Rudy." Wow, childhood friends...! Another set!? She really is Eris two! "He was my teacher back then, the one who taught me a lot... Ah, he also thought I was a guy and undressed me." Why did you suddenly hit me with that information!?

A giggles comes out from Sylphie. "By the way... He doesn't actually know who I am. Please keep it that way Subaru, I want him to figure it out by himself." I nod... To be honest that sounds kind of stupid to me, but considering my track record, maybe it's super genius.

Ariel shrugs, a mocking smile on her face. "Honestly Sylphie, if you keep up with that romance novel plot of yours, you are never going to make any progress towards winning his heart." Probably true, but mean.

While Sylphiette tries to protest, Darkness crosses her arms. "Don't pay any mind to her Sylphiette. I understand that a ladies idea of romance can be very specific." Yours is just being mistreated.

The elf nods, excitement on her face. "Y-yes, I want him to remember our time together!" She gives me a shy side look. "Being pursued feels nice after all... Even if I know it's mean." I can't disagree with that. Eris being the attack dog that she is has given me quite the experience after all.

I chuckle. "With a personality and looks like yours it isn't gonna be too hard. Any guy would be all over you, unless his name happens to be Luke Greyrat that is." I ignore the scowl coming from the man.

That's because I truly believe what I said. Sylphiette is cute, and nice... which is all a guy needs. Though I have recently learned of the value of spice with Eris... It would still be nice to have a stable rock like this elf around.

Sylphie looks down, a blush on her face. "Subaru you really... really... really...!" Ah, her mind is gone. "B-by the way, how did you meet Eris!?" And so she desperately tries to change the subject, how adorable.

Ariel nods. "I'm also curious. And it goes without saying that I'm also incredibly curious about the circumstances surrounding Darkness... From what I understand she teleported here?" If there's one thing I learned, is that teleportation is scary.

I nod back. "Yep. By the way... I just sort of met Eris by coincidence, though she did beat me up at first, there's nothing special there. The only personhere who I have history with is Nanahoshi, we knew each other as kids..." And now she decided that she hates me... Truly we have returned to the status quo.

Sylphiette's eyes widen. "Nanahoshi... You mean Silent Seven Stars!?" The silent group...! "She... she's... to be honest I..." She pouts, do they dislike each other? "I'm surprised you went out with Eris and not her..." She grumbles at the end.

I raise an eyebrow. "Eh, just because we knew each other as kids doesn't mean anything." Maybe that's the difference between modern romance and old romance. "Love can be born anywhere you know?" Specially with soulmate magic...

But I get what Sylphiette is saying. She presumably came from a very small village with few kids, and in situations like these is normal to marry your childhood friend... She's definitely projecting on me though...

The elf weakly smiles. "I suppose so... And it's not like I know much about you two... Or about you in general Subaru. We met not too long ago after all." True. It's always weird to think about how little time I spent on this world.

I smile back. "We will have plenty of time to chat in the future, don't worry." That seems to have lifted her spirits up. "And speaking of stuff about me... I have good news! Me and Eris got engaged recently!" And now it's time for their reactions.

First is Darkness. She already knew, in fact she was there when Eris proposed to me, so... She obviously doesn't react much. Luke is much more curious though, because he actually looks dead inside now... I don't like this guy. I have decided that now.

And to my great relief, Ariel doesn't seem like she's about to stab me, in fact she's smiling. "Oh my! Congratulations Lord Subaru!" She looks down on her tea and whispers. "It's gonna make the future all the more sweet..." I agree...?

No, but seriously. I'm really happy she's taking this so well... It just goes to show that Ariel really is a nice and pure princess. Though really, we never had any chance to be together anyways, the hierarchy difference between us is too great.

Before I can respond however, the table shaken. That's because a flustered Sylphiette has just gotten up and crashed her palms against it. "N-no...!" No what!? Don't tell me this is a betrayal from an elf!

She clenches her fists. "I-I...! I'm an idiot who's being left behind...!" And then she turns around and dashes out of the room. Basically breaks the door on her way out too... That's elf strength for you.

Before I can question my friends if we should go after her, they are already up and doing so. I go to imitate them of course, though I can't help, but mutter. "It was going so well too...!" What was that all about!?

Eventually we catch up to the elf... Who's crying on the arms of Quagmire. "Rudy...! It's me! Sylphie! Please...! Just please do something already!" Hah!? Weren't you gonna let him figure it out by himself!?

Rudeus awkwardly hugs her back. "S-sure...? Wait! Sylphie!? Is that you Sylphiette!?" The elf nods. "That's... This is crazy!" Yeah, from your perspective things just went from a zero to a hundred.

The elf shouts. "R-Rudy! P-please...! Go out with me!" The Quagmire hesitantly nods, and so a new couple is formed...? What the hell does this loser thinks he's doing with my elf!? I'm ruining this relationship!

Oi! I just had a really dangerous thought for some reason!

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