A Hundred Girlfriends Who Really Love You... In Another World! 05 (Patreon)

You know, as I continue my trek through snow, I can't help, but regret my previous actions. The Holy Land Of Swords isn't even that bad! Sure there's no entertainment there, but they have food, warm water... I miss warm water so much...!

I never really thought about how horrible it would be for someone of my... ex-NEET status to travel for two weeks straight, but I have quickly learned that I'm indeed not built for this. It also doesn't help that I have to follow Eris' tough orders and training.

Suddenly Eris glares at me. "What's wrong?" Why are you asking if I'm okay and at the same time sounding like you're mad at me!? "You've been doing that ugly face for a while now..." Sorry that I hate the cold.

I try to fake a smile on my face. "Don't worry! It's just that this Subaru Natsuki is facing his greatest enemy yet...! Piles of snow!" I laugh a little. "I won't be defeated that easily though, for I have the power of-" She cuts me off.

"You really are annoyed aren't you?" I raise an eyebrow in surprised. It's true, but I did try to play it off as a joke. "You're always doing that, playing stuff up to hide your feelings... clown. I don't like it." When did you decide to start a serious topic like that!?

I awkwardly laugh. "I... seriously, I'm fine. This snow isn't a big deal at all." The only reason why it's bothering me is because I'm an ex-NEET who only made trips to supermarkets. I won't embarass myself by getting genuinely angry.

It's just that... This trip has been going on for so long. I'm sure we are close to our destination, but it is getting on my nerves. Man, maybe being an adventurer sucks, if they constantly have to deal with this. I miss toilets you know!?

Eris blushes and looks down, she then starts stuttering like crazy. "W-well, I'm just a-asking because... b-because if it's really b-bothering you, then I-I don't m-mind carrying you...!" My pride would never survive such a situation! But I almost want to accept...!

Nina interjects. "Nuh-uh Eris." Immediately she receives a glare, but she doesn't back down. That's because she hasn't been getting hit as much recently, Eris is not actually a fool, and we are in a place with no healers, so the Nina abuse has been toned down. "This is training remember? You aren't supposed to coddle him." True, even if I hate it.

Eris huffs and looks away. "Whatever! It's not like I care!" I'm your pupil, so please tone down the tsundere and start caring! "Anyways, how close are we Nina? You think the supplies we bought are enough? Should we start hunting for food?" Hunting huh... In a fantasy land like this it sounds scary.

I have seen animals here before of course, but I have also seen monsters, so I wonder which one we would hunt... Either way, I probably won't be involved, Nina and Eris have been the ones dispatching any enemies we encounter.

Nina shrugs. "We should be fine, I give it like... two more days until we make it." That's so much time though! "We are actually moving faster than I did, even though we have more people..." A blush appears on her face. "Probably 'cause I got lost a few times." I see...

Pathetic. Expected of a meathead like you though, in fact travel is dangerously stupid for all three of us, considering we don't even know how to read. Damn you Jino! I will never forgive you for not wanting to go through a long ass journey when you had no reason to follow us!

Eris glares at her. "We better not be lost right now. I can handle myself just fine, but Subaru can't, make sure to remember that." Stop bullying me just because I'm a beginner! Don't I give an imposing image with a nickname like Purge King...!? Even though no one actually calls me that.

Nina waves her off. "I know, I know. Don't worry, just keep watch for any monsters, they could be hiding in the snow." A terrifying prospect, in fact don't even mention that. Still, are monsters even smart enough to make those kind of decisions?

I pout. "Man, monsters are scar-" I stop speaking immediately, something sticky and wet is wrapped around my throat. It isn't strong enough to crush my neck, but it's pulling me down into the snow.

The smell of blood, the sound of flesh being cut, and the relief of being able to breathe again. "Ah...!" I can see something falling to the ground, it's what was wrapped around me, a tongue.

It happened faster than I could process, a monster tried to pull me down with it's tongue, and then Eris cut that tongue off, while she did that, Nina tracked the thing and stabbed it in it's hiding place, though I can't actually see if it's dead of course.

Nina has a serious face on. "Eris." The red haired girl nods, and picks me up, putting me over her shoulder immediately. I can only imagine these two had made plans in case a situation like this happened.

Still, adrenaline is rising inside of my body, so I let out a shout. "That was crazy...! What was that!?" A monster just tried, and failed, to kill me. Holy shit. Also fuck you Nina, you definitely brought this upon us by bringing it up.

Suddenly my vision is filled with pink, that's because hundreds of tongues are attacking me and Eris by all sides. The Goddess of War however, is invincible, so even though she only has one hand available she cuts them all before they can even reach us.

It's surprising to be honest, Eris isn't a practitioner of the Water God style, so as she cuts off another tongue, I can't help, but think why she is being so successful. Eventually I realize why however, the answer is simple, it's pure raw power.

Eris may not be trained in the style that is all about defending others, but she is so strong and fast that it simply does not matter. The gap between her and this creature is simply too god damn huge...!

My vision starts to blur, it must be because Eris is just that fast... I'm getting dizzy too, probably because she's spinning around so fast. It makes me wanna throw up, the only reason I don't is because I'm so mesmerized.

Still, she's gonna be overrun eventually if she just stays here... I think. To be honest it wouldn't surprise me if she just cut off the tongues from every stalkerish monster in the entire world.

However, she is not alone. Nina is a appreciate of the Sword God style, she's a woman who has reached the Rank of Saint. In essence she's someone who can wipe out an army, just like Eris she is above this enemy, and her offense is unbelievably high.

Which is why everytime one of these little monsters dares to poke their tongue off, they tend to die immediately. Most of their tongues don't even reach Eris' blade, because opening their mouths around this blur is a sin worthy of death.

That's right, a blur, Nina has become a blue blur who simply wipes all that she touches. I don't know who Blue Lightning Cecilus is, but right now I feel like this girl is truly deserving of that title.

But there's something... there's something strange, even though I know I can't keep up with her, why... why can't I keep up wity anything? Why am I only seeing blurs? Because they're fast. Why am I dizzy? Because Eris is spinning around.

Why am I cold sweating? Because you're wearing really hot clothing, it's cold, it's hot, it's cold, it's hot. Why is my throat itching? Because, because, because, because, because, because...! Why is it that my throat is itching!?

I need to scratch it, I need to...! I close my eyes. I open my eyes. I close my eyes. I open my eyes. I close my eyes. I open my eyes. I close my eyes. I open my eyes.

"C'mon...! You can't die because of something that stupid! You just can't...!" Eris is crying. It's sorta strange, since she was fighting just a second ago.

My throat is itching, even though I have been scratching it. The smell of blood is coming from me now, my fingers are bloody now, my throat is hurting now. It's no good though, because I can still feel that hellish itching...!

I close my eyes. I open my eyes. 

Gotta scratch until the dizziness goes away, gotta scratch until the sickness goes away, gotta scratch until the sweat goes away. Scratch, scratch, scratch, scratch, scratch. Where am I anyways?

"I couldn't... any... healers!" Nina. 

"Damn it... why... why!?" Eris.

Scratch one final time. I never stop feeling the itchiness.

///////////

"I am so sorry, but it seems you have died." A voice reaches me in this empty void of darkness, but I can barely pay attention to it. That's because my hand immediately goes to my throat, to see if I still have it.

I grip it tightly, it's there, it's not itching. I grit my teeth... "That hurt...! That really hurt...!" Tears are descending from my eyes both because of that experience, and because I'm so glad it's finally over...

The voice speaks up again. "Indeed, it was horrible thing... I'm so sorry you had to go through that..." Yeah, it's over now, so it's just a bad memory, just a bad memory. "Now, be aware that you can have as much time as you need to process this, but you did indeed die, so we do have to talk about that..." Hah?

I raise my head to speak with the voice, and what greets me is a young beautiful, silver haired~, woman. All of that is kinda ignored though, since she just said some outrageous stuff. "What do you mean dead!?" Our eyes meet.

A familiar shock runs through my body, oh boy. I can see her eyes slowly widen, as a very prominent blush appears on her face, which must mean she felt the same thing I just did... Except she must be feeling it much harder, since she's a woman.

That's right, this mysterious girl is a soulmate of mine, and I have a feeling that she knows that, considering she covers her mout in shock, and tears appear on the corner of her eyes. "Oh. My. Me! I have been waiting for something like this since forever...!" What do you mean oh my me!?

She then starts fanning herself with one of her hands. "Calm down Eris, calm down, follow procedure...!" She fakes a cough. "Yes, it is with great, great sadness that I must inform you that you have died. It seems that a frog monster killed you, it's venomous tongue transmitted poison through your skin pores." That's...!

She continues, a sad expression on her face... which is kinda ruined since she's clearly trying to not smile. "Your companions tried to rush to the closest city, and they did take you to a doctor... He healed your body, but your soul did not survive for long enough. I'm so sorry Subaru Natsuki." So she knows my name...

I grit my teeth and clench my fists. "That's...! There's no way it all ended like that!" There's tears fallind down my face, I... does this mean I'm never gonna see anyone I care about ever again? That I'm never gonna be a hero?

Only I would get isekai'd, and then get killed by a stupid frog monster of all things. "Damn it! Why am I always so...! So unlucky...!" That's right it was all bad luck. Both Eris and Nina were ready, they reacted as fast as possible, it's just that the stupid frog was venomous.

The girl raises her hands towards me, a panicked expression on her face. "D-don't worry! Everything is gonna be okay for now on! And y-you're definitely gonna be luckier! I'm sorry I didn't notice you before!" What are you even talking about...

I slowly try to regain my composure. "Wait a minute... if I'm dead, who even are you?" She's a soulmate of mine at least, clearly. And she didn't react with the same type of surprise as someone like Eris... I think she knows what happened just now. Now the big question is, does she know that I know?

She gives me what I assume is an attempt at a comforting smile. "I am the Goddess of Fortune, Eris!" Ah, the rival to my War Goddess showed up! "I know it must have been tough... working so hard once Miss Aqua brought you to this world, but... Heaven isn't too bad you know?" She blushes and starts playing with her hair. "All you can do there is talk, but isn't that sort of beautiful?" No! That sounds awful! Though at least I'm going to heaven...?

However, she said something strange... So I raise an eyebrow. "Aqua? What do you mean by that?" That's the name of the goddess that is worshipped by the Axis Cult right? The one that is filled with losers...

Does that mean that she brought me to this world? That must mean she's a world travelling goddess... I want to fill in a official complaint to that shitty love god, I wonder if Eris would let me do that.

Eris blinks in confusion and disbelief for a few moments. "Huh? Didn't she... you know... revive you in this world, 'cause you died on Earth?" I shake my head, I never even met her. "But... didn't she... you know... give you a cheat so you could beat the Demon King?" That sure would be nice, but not.

I sigh. "Sorry, but I never even met this Aqua..." Should I tell her the love god brought me here? What if he did something illegal!? I have a feeling it's better to keep some secrets for now... specially since she's talking about reviving people.

She's a goddess, so maybe I can take advantage of this soulmate thing to get my ass resurrected... Man, I don't know how to feel about the fact that this goddess is my soulmate. Isn't that kinda cheating?

Also, let's not even talk about how two of my soulmates are called Eris.

Eris' eyes widen. "B-but... give me a sec Subaru!" And she starts waving her hands in the air, as if... I have no idea what she's trying to do! "Ah! Why can't I find any papers about you at all!?" Sorry, are my dead documents out of date...? Wait, I'm not sorry at all!

I raise a hand. "Um... excuse me, but since I never used my free resurrection card, can you bring me back to life? Please...?" This is something serious, I can't just... I can't just stay dead, right?

Eris' face becomes blank. "Um... I don't know...?" What do you mean you don't know!? Stupid useless godd- I have to control my nerves. "H-hey, it seems I'm having some trouble finding your documents, so could you tell me some stuff about life...? Pretty please?" I feel like that's gonna end up with me being screwed over though...

I squint my eyes towards her direction. "Why? You knew how I died, and you knew my name. What more do you want?" I won't just give out my information because she's a cute silver haired girl. I'm not that weak and pathetic...!

Her lips tremble. "Well I... I only got the detail of the end of your life, so, so...! And I can't find your papers, and I'm not used to this because normally Miss Aqua does this type of work, so...!" Ah, she's almost crying.

I'm making a silver haired beauty cry. "My father's name is Kenichi, my mother's name is Naoko. I'm Japanese, I'm also eighteen years old. I used to do track when I was a kid, and I did a year in kendo before I gave up." Shit, I am weak and pathetic!

She smiles brightly, I hate myself. "Thank you so much for being cooperative Subaru! I'll find us a nice house in Heaven!" Us!? If you don't revive me there will be no us! "Now let me find ya real quick!" You sound too excited damn excited about the prospect of looking over my confidential information!

She waves her hands in the air for a few moments, but... nothing happens again. "Why though!? Who messed all of this up!?" You I'm assuming... or the love god! I know he's an irresponsible bastard, and definitely checked my information before... He must have lost my documents!

I grin. "You know Lady Eris, there is an easy solution to this..." I must actually thank that bastard, the confusion that he's causing might actually end up helping me in the end. Probably.

She gives me a hopeful look. "There is!?" And then a blush appears on her face. "A-and there's no need to call me lady..." Your reactions are adorable and all, but I'm dead, so  please stop acting like a giggling schoolgirl!

I respond with a deadpan tone. "Revive me. Then all problems will be fixed." I cannot let my legacy be the fact that I died to a fucking frog of all things. At least let me die to something cooler!

And now she's back to panicking Eris. "I can't do that though...! I think...!" Please don't let my life be decided on 'I think'! "I... screw it, this is an emergency damn it! So it should be fine to call for help!" For a second I got my hopes up, thinking she was gonna revive me, but no, she's just calling a higher up, I guess.

A red button appears on her palm, in it the words 'Never press this' are written. It's not in Japanese either, it's some godly language that I both can understand, and can't understand. Something, something Babel, I guess.

With great hesitantly Eris moves her index finger close to the button. "H-here we go!" And finally she presses. And... it's pressed, I guess. It's a normal button, and so it barely does any sound at all.

Until a light flashes and a portal to... inside of a house opens to her side. I immediately get up. "An escape!" This is my chance, and I'm not wasting it no matter what... It's what I think, but then I trip like a dumbass.

Eris is sending me a concerned look. "Um... please don't go there! Or you will become a lost wandering soul for all time...! Or at least until someone exorcises you." Ah, I just avoided a bad end by tripping... That's good luck, I guess.

To my surprise a voice comes out of the portal. "Aqua, why is there a portal in my living room? Aqua, why is Eris inside the portal? Aqua, why is there an ugly guy inside the portal?" Now that I'm taking a look at you, I can tell you're not exactly handsome either, so shut up!

This... Aqua woman, appears too. She's... certainly something. Somehow her outfit is the craziest one I have seen yet, and even her blue hair is pretty extravagant. In fact, everything about her is extravagant, she might even give a silver haired elf girl a run for their money! Wait a second, what do you mean Aqua!?

The maybe goddess of lunatics shrugs. "Kazuma I don't know the answer to the first question. Kazuma I don't know the answer to the second question. Kazuma I don't know the answer to the third question." You...

Both this supposed Kazuma and I answer at the same time. "Why did you answer like that!?" We immediately look at each other, a solid bond of brotherhood is immediately formed... This is guy is a worthless NEET, I can tell.

Aqua doesn't even bother looking at me as she glares at Eris. "So faker, bother explaining yourself...? I'm a busy woman you know?" For some reason I doubt that.

Kazuma immediately confirms my suspicions. "Eris, Aqua got drunk in the morning then slept all day. She did nothing today, she did nothing yesterday, she does nothing ever." At least she's cute...? Definitely my type at least, but we all know my luck when it comes to romance... That said, it's not like we have made eye contact either...

To that, Eris can only awkwardly wave towards them. "Um, hello Kazuma! Hello Aqua!" The definitely a NEET smiles and waves back, while Aqua keeps glaring at her. "The truth is... I can't find the papers of this dead soul so I need help!" I am the one who needs help!

Immediately Aqua starts laughing, and pointing at Eris. "You already messed up!? Lmao, you really are hopeless!" Did you really have to say lmao!? And now Eris is crying! "Anyways, so what do you want to do? Isekai this loser...?" She finally looks at me. Our eyes meet.

A shock runs through me. No fucking way. There's no way that two goddess are my soulmates, just one was already absurd enough. Besides, didn't the love god arrange this!? How did he rope two other goddess ingo this!?

Aqua's mocking glare disappears, and a smile replaces it, she basically jumps out of joy. "Yes! Yes!" She actually has small little tears in her eyes, much like Eris she must have realized what just happened...

And speaking of Eris, there's a growing look of horror in her face. "Oh no..." The words she mutters are simple, but they're filled with a great amount of fear. It goes without saying that I'm absolutely terrified as well.

Why? Because both of these goddesses seem actually happy with this situation... I know enough about greek legends, I don't wanna get in the middle of a cat fight of two divinities! Send me back to my War Goddess please!

Kazuma raises an eyebrow. "Why are you suddenly so happy Aqua? Wait, they're not dragging you back to heaven are they!?" A bright smile appears on his face. "Please tell me they are!" Oi.

Aqua excitedly shakes her head. "None of that is happening!" And Kazuma's smile is replace by an ugly frown. "It's just that this..." She sends a imaginary kiss my way. "Hunk! Is about to fix all our problems!" I am! "Eris send him here with his cheat already! I have plenty of debts that need to be paid...!" Wait does she think Eris is gonna isekai me...?

The goddess of lunatics sends me a wink. "Oh we are gonna have so much fun! I wanna show you so many cool tricks I learned recently...! Also, sex is forbidden for goddesses, but that's why they made the backdoor!" I'm suddenly very interested in you Miss Aqua.

Kazuma pulls her ear, she immediately starts screaming, though he ignores it. "Calm down on the sexual harassment. Please." It's okay, I was very interested in that particular brand of sexual harassment! "Seriously you made a shiver of disgust run down my spine." Fair enough!

Aqua escapes his grip and glares at him. "Look who's talking!" And then she looks back at me, a smirk on her face. "So, handsome... what's your name? Mine's Aqua... By the way cheats that make alcohol are the best." I feel like my brain is dying the longer I spend speaking with these people.

I send her an awkward smile. "I... um..." I take a deep breath, trying to calm myself down. "My name is Subaru Natsuki, it's really nice to meet you Aqua." She giggles, for some reason I feel like... like she's dangerous. Well, she is a goddess, and my knowledge of tropes do say all goddesses are yanderes... I must escape!

Kazuma crosses his arms. "So you're gonna be another cheating bastard...? Well, if you're gonna be working with us..." He nods to himself. "Then that's fine, I guess. My name is Kazuma Sato, I'm also from Japan, please don't take an alcohol related cheat, or an item that's easy to steal." As I thought, he's a fellow loser from Japan. 

I awkwardly give him a nod. I don't know how to feel in this weird situation where I'm dead. I'm starting to think that maybe that love god wasn't so bad after all, if this is what I'm expected to worship.

Eris fakes a cough, getting everyone's attention. "Please remember that I contacted you to ask for help Miss Aqua... I can't find Subaru's information, even though he even gave me details like his parents names." Good, I shouldn't have given that to you.

Aqua pouts. "I see... But who cares!? You don't need that information to send someone to another world. Just find it later or whatever, you shitty worker, I can't wait until they replace you with A.I." They can do that with goddesses!?

Wait a second, Aqua wants to see me... This is an opportunity I can't let go to waste, so before Eris says anything, I start shouting. "Aqua, she's not trying to isekai me! She's sending me to hell! Please help me!" Actually she's sending me to heaven, but I want to use emotional blackmail on my soulmate.

Aqua immediately glares at the Goddess of Fortune. "Explain yourself. Immediately." She sounds actually kind of serious, and for some reason I feel like that should be completely impossible.

Eris sputters. "I'm not sending him to hell, I'm sending him to heaven! And... and... you don't need to worry Aqua! He's my soulmate too, so I'm only doing the best for him!" Her face becomes a tomato as she looks at me. "Forget what you just heard!" Yep, they're definitely expecting me to not know this soulmate thing!

Aqua's eye twitches. "So... not only are you trying to kill my man, but you're also trying to steal him...? I need someone to pay my debt so back off worthless scumbag bitch." W-wow you really raised up the level of swearing suddenly!

Kazuma sighs. "I don't know what's going on here, but I'm scared, so I'm gonna go bother Darkness or something." He leaves, doing something I wish I had the power to do.

Eris takes a step back in shock. "I'm not trying to steal anyone! I promise! It's just that I can't revive someone without permission from heaven...!" She sends me a teary eyes look. "I'm so sorry, but everything must end eventually Subaru!" 

Aqua stomps the floor, getting Eris' attention again. "I'm gonna end your life then!" Yeah, now the Goddess of Fortune is definitely having a panic attack. "You're just trying to keep him to yourself, 'cause I got kicked out!" Eris desperately shakes her head in denial.

Aqua however, completely ignores her, and crosses her arms, a cocky smirk on her face. "Revive him or I'm telling." Oh? Now I'm curious...

Eris gasps. "Y-you wouldn't! Not to my soulmate!"

Aqua's shit eating grin only grows mightier. "Hey Subaru, this pathetic Eris here pads her che-."

...

My eyes open.