Midnight Pals: Raw Deal (Patreon)

[mysterious circle of robed figures]
JK Rowling: hello children
Rowling: i've just learned ssssome disssturbing newsss
Rowling: from a reputable sssource
Rowling: a random nazi on twitter
Rowling: but
Rowling: i really really REALLY want it to be true

Rowling: did you know
Rowling: that puberty blockers deaden a childsss sssoul?
Rowling: a transss child is literally an inhuman shell
Kathleen Stock: wow! like a monster!
Rowling: yesss
Rowling: exactly like a monster
Rowling: think about it

Rowling: what i'm sssaying is that trans kids are bassically monsssterss
Stock: what about those trans kids who keep saying that gender affirming care is life saving?
Rowling: well
Rowling: a monssster would lie wouldn't it?

Rowling: now then we all know what to do about monssstersss don't we
Stock: yeah! kill them!
Rowling: i meant deny them the ussse of magical wandsss as per Claussse Three of the Code of Wand Ussssse
Rowling: but alssso yess kill them

Rowling: friendss the time hasss come
Rowling: we mussst kill thessse children in order to sssave them
Rowling: sssave them from the living death that is ssself-determination!

[meanwhile]
Dan Simmons: so i heard some wokies thought frankenstein got a raw deal
Mary Shelley:
Simmons: like haha! Stupid commies, having sympathy for a monster!
Simmons: i mean, he's literally a monster!
Shelley: does no one here know how to read

Mary Shelley: the whole point of the fuckin book was that frankenstein got a raw deal
Simmons: sounds like cultural marxism to me
Shelley: [stabbing Simmons] does anyone ELSE here not know how to read?
Rowling: [unfurling from bushes] me, i don't