Midnight Pals: Baby Musk (Patreon)

Stephen King: [throws football] go wide, joe!
Joe Hill: [catches football] I love you, dad!
King: I love you too son
Elon Musk:
Musk: eyyyy whata the fuck

Musk: you thinka you winna this round, Stephano king?
Musk: you thinka you betta than me just because you bambinos like-a you?
Musk: I showa you
Musk: eeeey looka here it’s baby elon
Musk: [hastily putting on diaper] eeeey itsa me baby elon

Musk: eyyy it’s me baby elon
Musk: I lova my papa
Musk: my papa da smartest man inna world
Musk: he so smart he never getta caught roleplaying online assa his bambino

Musk: itsa mee baby elon!
Musk: ima just a little bambino!
Musk: a blanka slate!
Musk: nothing inna my head!
Musk: ima yours to molda twitter
xXxFartknocker420xXx: did you know that black people have a goblin that lives in their heads and makes them do crime
Musk: mama mia!!!

Tiefling_Fucker6958537: did you know that trans people make their HRT out of the blood of Christian babies
Musk: mama mia!!!
Musk: thata concerning!!!
Musk: whya da media no report onna this

EldritchBitch4Eva8753: did you know that Italians aren’t even a real race
Musk: mama mia!
EldritchBitch4Eva8753: 90% of crimes are actually done by Italians
Musk: madone!!!
EldritchBitch4Eva8753: they even have special crime “families!” families that just do crime!
Musk:  itsa an outrage!

EldritchBitch4Eva8753: chef Boyardee is a plot to groom our children into the Italian lifestyle
Musk: eyyy I don’ta know about this
EldritchBitch4Eva8753: one sec
EldritchBitch4Eva8753: [acquires blue check]
Musk: mama mia!!! It musta be true!!!

Musk: mama mia we must enda da Italian minda virus!!!
Musk: da Italians, mama mia, dey no compatible with a de civilization!!
Poe: wait this EldritchBitch4Eva8753 screenname looks familiar
Poe: howard did you radicalize elon against himself
Lovecraft: [sweats] n-no