A Simple Life: Chapter 72 (Patreon)

That night I barely get a wink of sleep as my mind turns over and over and over again about what had happened.  I chastise myself for all the things I did wrong and replay the moment Winona became upset with me.  How would I do it different if given the chance?  What should I have done or said?  I think about the situation this dumb black eye had gotten me in and consider how to make sure it never happened again.  How was I going to deal with Jack?  If only he wasn’t family, it would have been so easy.  I also think about Winona.  What was she doing right now?  Was she still upset with me?  Was her night as sleepless as mine?

For all my worries and anxieties however there were also so many good feeling mixed in.  The way she spoke to me at the end, the way she was so careful to contain the anger that I knew was in her heart to speak to me with such…respect.  It touched me.  With the exception of Grandpa my family’s habit was to shoot from the hip when emotions got high, to inflict as much damage as possible before their blood cooled, then apologize for everything after the fact.  Not with Winona though.  During our first argument she had held her tongue.  She left before she could say anything truly hurtful.  Despite being upset her first concern was to do no harm.  And she assured me that she loved me before she left.  Maybe that was the norm with other people but words could not express what that all meant to me.  How I loved that woman.

What fun we’d had tonight!  The game.  The smooching.  The laughter.  The sexy times in here.  I could still taste her.  Mmmmm.  And then there was the balcony and the utterance of those three simple little words that changed my world forever.  Nearly the perfect night…if not for this stupid eye.

Back to the beginning my thoughts go along with the rise of all my fears and worries to start the roller coaster all over again.

At 6:30 am I give up the pretense of sleeping and shuffle to the kitchen for a morning tea.  As I sit and watch steam rise from my cup the way last night ended gnaws at me.  I look to my phone.  No.  It’s too early.  She won’t even be up yet.  Besides, she’ll think me some desperate weirdo for contacting her at this hour.

I sit there in my quiet apartment until my tea, still full to the brim, wasn’t steaming anymore.  “Screw it.”

Grabbing my phone I head back to my room.  Instead of using it however it is slipped into the pocket of my jeans the moment I am dressed.  What I had to say couldn’t be said over the phone.  I NEEDED to see her face.  I NEEDED to feel her hands in mine.  I need to be in her presence so that I could grovel with all my heart.  And I needed to do it before her dad got there for the day.

I am dressed, freshened up, and already slipping a jacket on when Brayden come stumbling out of his room befuddled and disheveled.

“G-Good luck on your first day of w-work!”  I say as I am stepping out the door.  “I know you’ll do g-great.”

“What the?”  He blinks and squints.  “Where are you…?”

I am gone before my dozy brained roomie can get the question out.

Outside I find the air chilly and the slowly brightening unbroken ceiling of clouds as gray as yesterday, but at least the rain had stopped.  I zip up my jacket, pull on my helmet and start up my bike.  Before I know it I am weaving through town on the way to the highway out of it.

As my tires turn so to does my fatigued mind.  What was I doing out here at this time of day?  Gah!  This was nuts.  I was nuts.  I couldn’t just roll up to Winona’s now.  I needed to let this breathe.  I needed to collect my own thoughts before facing her again  I needed to get a plan of action.  This could have waited a day or two.  Geez Avery, calm down would ya?  This love stuff had me acting crazy.

I laugh at myself and my silliness.  Ah well.  A ride in the fresh morning air would do me wonders.  Opening up the throttle I rip along the quiet highway nearly as fast as my little dirt bike could go.  I had the road all to myself, that is until I see a truck coming the other way on the long straight away into town.  A brown truck.  An old, brown F-150.  A familiar old, brown F-150.  I knew that truck!

She spots me as I spot her and each of us pulling to the shoulder and slamming on our brakes.  We overshoot each other by about twenty yards.  I am off of my bike, helmet thrown to the ditch.  Winona is out of the cab, door slammed behind her.  We run for each other, our need to touch overriding our care at how silly or crazy we looked.  We meet across the center line of the highway.  She takes my hands in hers and squeezes them tight.  Under her slightly bloodshot eyes I see the same dark circles I’d seen in the mirror under mine.

“I’m sorry!”  We both say at once.  We laugh.

“No.  Me.”  She insists as she gazes deep into my eyes.  “You’re right Avery.  I don’t know your family.  I don’t know your brother.  I don’t know anything.  I just met you and, even though I feel like I know you, I have so much to learn.  And…and…I want to learn!  I want to learn everything about you Avery.”  Her outpouring of words were coming one on top of the next.  It was as if she were worried if she didn’t get them all out at once they’d never come at all.  “I’m sorry I didn’t trust you.  I’m sorry I tried to meddle in your family.  I’m sorry I left.  I’m…sorry.”

I’m crying, again.  This woman just had a way of getting my tears flowing.

I sniffle and grip her hands as tight as I can.  “I’m s-s-sorry.  I’m sorry I t-tried to k-keep you out.  I’m s-sorry I didn’t explain it right.  I’m s-sorry I tried to ignore it and avoid it wh-when I c-could see how important it was to you.  There’s n-nothing wrong with wanting to protect your friends.  It’s…w-wonderful!  I want the r-r-real you.”  I sniff and swallow.  “Just, w-with my f-family…”

“Leave it to you.”

“Yeah.  I’m s-sorry.  It has to b-be that way.”

“Alright.”  She sighs and pulls me into a hug.  “When you do need help, you’ll let me?”

“Yes.”  I whisper.  “I will.  I swear I will.”

“When you’re ready to talk about it?”

“I know you’ll be there.”

“Okay.  Okay.”  She kisses me.  “Okay?”

I smile and nod.  “Okay.”

Her eyes meet mine and she slowly pulls me in for soft, tender, loving…WHOOSH!  HONNNNK!

A truck from the power company roars past us.  From out his open window the worker shakes a fist and swears back at us.  “God damn crazy kids!”

We look at each other and begin to giggle.

“We almost died!”

“Pfff!  Y-Yeah!”

“HA HA HA HA!”  Our joined laughter rings out across the peninsula.

“Hey, what are ya doin for breakfast Sprout?”

I grin, feeling not at all tired.  “Whatever you’re d-doing.  And I d-don’t have to work today.  I got n-nothin but time.”

“Hey, hey!”  She pats my chest.  “My man.”  Putting her arm around my shoulder she leads me toward my bike.  As she rolls my bike to her truck I start looking for where my helmet rolled.  Just my luck I find it in a thick clump of thistles.

“Found it!”  I stand and hold up over my head.

“Right on!”  She calls back from the bed of her truck.  She had already hoisted my bike into the box…without help…without a ramp…without even putting the tailgate down.  Dang that girl was strong!  I was starting to wonder if I was protecting Winona from my brother or the other way around.

Chapter 73