Dungeon Lunchers (Patreon)

(contains slime consumption and rapid weight gain)

Guest starring: Redbow, Flux, and Max-O-Zuma

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The thing about adventuring guilds is; you get what you pay for. Sometimes it was a job well done from the best of friends, their bonds forged from stone and dragons fire. Other times it was a group of random yahoos that happened to wander in looking for some way to pay off a mounting bar tab.

This was an adventuring party composed of the later's spirit. Not that any of them were reckless drunks, but precise coordination and experience seemed lacking in their ranks. A point best emphasized by how their dungeon raid ended two minutes after getting inside. Even if the steel doors marking the entrance had not busted their dwarven gear mechanisms, an extensive cave-in made sure access to them would be near impossible.

"HUPP!"

That was not going to stop Asibow from trying. The muscular goat woman had not spent years of training in the frozen mountains to end up prematurely entombed. Hell, they were not even in an important tomb. More like some random cave system a rich lord needed clearing out for his wine storage business. Even so, there was little room to redirect all the rocks. Biceps bulged as she tried to move a rock over half her nine-foot size. Her legs trembled the short five steps to drop it off to one side of the tunnel, a wave of pain searing under white fur matted in sweat.

A light tingle ran down Asibow's spine, causing her armor plates to clank together in a hard shudder. All at once, the strain left her well-worked limbs, filling her with a sense of relief. Heaving a pleasant sigh, she turned back with a nod and smile. "Thanks."

"Uh, huh." Max was a lot less cheerful, given their party's current situation. Still, the tiger wizard remained seated on one relatively smooth boulder fiddling with the wooden stick in his hands. The wand of cure ailments was his last valuable possession after wizard school, and here he was burning charges on a lumbering fighter's fatigue. "Not to criticize the efforts, but it'll be days before we can clear all this."

"Only with that attitude." Asibow sunk into a squat trying to heft another boulder. It got a few inches off the ground before her grip slipped, narrowly missing her boots with its heavy thud. Magic can remove her burnout, but it was not like she regained any stamina. "Surely you've rested long enough to have some spells by now?"

"What? You want me to try a lightning bolt next? In this tight space, we might end up frying to death before the noise deafens us."

Asibow scoffed, turning to use the dropped boulder as a seat for her plump rear. "Hey, you're the one that thought using a fireball to disarm a trap was a good idea. I coulda just tanked whatever they rigged, and we'd be on our way."

"Some of us want to avoid the risk of your head being lopped off," Max said back. His free hand absently searched the pockets of his robes only to find them empty like the last five attempts. He shifted an accusing glare towards their third party member. "Lord knows we can't rely on a rogue to do their job for us."

A black fox in a green top and skirt stood a fair distance further down the tunnel. Her face intently stared into the darkness, alert for any impending threats. The multicolored hairs tipping her luxurious tail and mane seemed to illuminate her form in the light of their one remaining torch. Flux was an android, which her companions took as some manner of a living construct. Not that anyone could tell with the fluffy and soft nature of her bodies voluptuous curves and noticeable belly pudge. Something to do with fuel being camouflaged as body fat to maintain an 'organic' appearance. A lot of technical jargon beyond her comrade's comprehension or attention span. 

Although she was on watch, the fox did risk a glance back at Max. The expression was generally neutral and impossible to read. "I feel I need to remind you, for the eighth time now, that I am a ranger, not a rogue. Our rogue made off with all our valuables last night, which is why we came here so poorly equipped. Something I also strongly advised you both against several times."

"Yes, fuck that guy." A rare look of anger crossed Asibow's face. Just thinking about where her good plate mail could be by now was making her stubby tail curl. "We can only hope wherever he is he's on fire."

Flux's lip curled into a slight grin. "Agreed, but such amusing thoughts do not benefit our current situation."

"Think I can use my ax to cut these rocks smaller? That'd make hauling them a lot easier."

"Pretty sure you won't have the energy to do both," Max said. His ears drooped, taking into account the wand absently being played with in his hand. "I'm almost out of charges, and we only brought a day of rations. Can't believe that ass even took our rings of sustenance."

"The average time it takes for a typical humanoid to starve to death is a month," Flux said in an attempt to offer Max comfort. She guessed by the wide-eyed shock on his face that her effort failed. "The job listing noted very few dangers for a group beyond our levels as well. Logically speaking, we are bound to find an alternative means of escape before hunger sets in."

GRRRUUUMBBLE!

All three adventures perked as a soft rumble carried through their hollowed stone prison. Flux's ears lowered into her mane before she turned back towards the tunnel. Her free hand resting atop her stomach did not escape the others notice.

"I didn't know you could get hungry," Asibow said after a long silence.

"My faux digestive track simulates the noise to alert me when my main fuel storage is nearly depleted."

Max stared blankly for a moment before laughing. "Yeah, stomachs tend to do that."

The muscular goat woman shrugged, unable to ignore the hard cramp seizing in her own stomach. She snatched up her travel pack, hoping they had enough water left for the remaining hardtack. "We should probably just take a rest as we are and head-on into the dungeon. At the very least there might be something we can put enough salt on to taste…"

"Wait up!" Flux barked, ears and tail perking.

The others promptly sat up following their rangers intent gaze into the darkness. Through the silence, it was easy to pick up what had alerted Flux; somewhere down the tunnel came a wet slapping sound, working in regular intervals that gradually became louder. Something was definitely coming. Asibow snagged up her great ax taking a position beside the vixen in case of attack. From behind the girls Max pocketed his restoration wand in favor of his magic missile rod. It had maybe four charges left before he would be reduced to cantrips as his means of support.

A rounded shape gradually emerged from the gloom. It's simple formed body hopped every few seconds to bring it another foot closer. Each landing made a wet smack that sent little droplets staining the stone floor of the tunnel. Moving into the light brought a bright sheen to its glossy blue surface, making the creatures goofy smiley face easy to identify.

"Really?" Asibow's shoulders relaxed with her irritated huff. The heavy blade of her ax hit the floor with a lazy thud. "All this trouble for a damn slime?"

"They were listed as a common monster populating this area," Flux said, remaining tense for any surprise attack. However, the giant ball of glossy ooze had stopped at the border of their light source. It's cartoonish wide eyes glanced from one anthro adventurer to the next trying to figure them out. "We should be cautious about a potential nest of these things."

"Oh, don't be dramatic." Even Max was putting away his wand. His striped tail thrashed in joyful relief. "I could throw a rock at that thing and probably kill it. Not that we should really waste the calories unless we have to."

Asibow met the monsters curious gaze, head tilting with a jolt of inspiration. "Hey. Do you think slimes are edible?"

The question caught even the slime off guard. Flux and Max slowly turned to stare at the relaxed goat before turning to each other. Soft rumbles emitted from all three of their empty tummies.

"Well, slimes are documented as being able to store large amounts of nutrients in their viscous state," Flux offered. "They usually are not harmful to touch unless they are already consuming some form of food."

"Good enough for me!" Max declared as he pushed through the two women. A flurry of hand gestures made his hands blur in the torchlight, ending with one clawed finger pointed at the slime.

From Max's claw erupted a lump of fire roughly the size of a baseball. It rocketed down the tunnel at the speed of a bullet, leaving the slime no choice but to take the spell into its surprised face. The rest of it promptly exploded, sending blue chunks splattering over the walls leaving a massive wet mess. A strange scent of cooked fruits began to linger in the stale air afterward.

"Chopping it up would have been a lot cleaner," Asibow pouted, hooking her ax onto its backstrap.

"You've been working too hard anyway. Now we can take a break with lunch." Max hurried to the nearest bits of slime with a wooden bowl in hand. The monster remains had a surprisingly thick consistency much like lard, making it easy to scoop off with a spoon.

"For all we know you could have just extinguished several hours worth of oxygen with that fire spell." Flux was in no hurry to collect her own meal share, nor did she move to stop Asibow from retrieving her mess kit.

"Those that hesitate miss out on the best treasure," Max said with an almost knowledgeable aura. He promptly shoved a spoon full of gooey substance into his muzzle.

"How is it?" Asibow asked as she returned with utensils in hand.

Max's first answer was to crack his tail as its fur puffed on end. The tiger slowly withdrew his spoon, staring past his companions into an endless void. It was hard to tell if his slit pupils expanding was a good sign.

"Are you experiencing hallucinations?" Flux offered.

"Nope!" Max's eyes snapped back to normal with a casual head shake. He swallowed the slick lump, purring softly at the tingling chill going down his throat. "I mean unless you girls are going to tell me you're really not a goat and vixen. This stuff is pretty good. It tastes like lime."

Asibow grinned, stretching the armor around her backside bending over to scoop up a heaping helping of slime. A delicate test lick generated the same wide-eyed reaction as her feline wizard. How something that grew inside moldy caves could taste like candied fruit was beyond her knowledge of monsters. Not that it was an essential question in their situation. They were just glad food would no longer be an issue.

Flux watched her companions proceed to gobble the slime down in large spoon fulls. Seeing no delayed poison-like effects befall them eventually convinced her to wedge their torch into a pile of rocks and grab a bowl. Soon the trio was almost enjoying themselves as slime was slurped and poured down their throats.

"Oof!? W-what the heck?" Asibow was stooping to collect her fourth or fifth bowl of the slick gelatin only to suddenly have trouble bending that far. The front of her plate armor pinched into her stomach and breasts something fierce. "Ugh! Don't tell me the bindings got caught again."

Asibow set her bowl down to reach for her waist, oddly finding it a lot sooner than usual. Having done this a thousand times in her adventuring career, the goat was able to manipulate the straps without looking. That was why when she expected to just ease out some slack the binds instead shot from her grasp under immense pressure. The breastplate flew into the adjacent wall with a loud clang while Asibow staggered from the sudden pull of frontal weights.

"OH, MY GODDESS!" Asibow looked down and screamed. "Where are my ABS!?"

Instead of the rigged hard muscles, her comrades were used to seeing, thick layers of furry white fat rolled out of Asibow's chest plate. Abs were hidden under a large dough ball with a deep belly button. Shaking hands reached out to cup it, finding the metal fingers of their gauntlets could press deep indentations into it. Hefty love handles spilled over straining hip plates, but it was the breasts straining out of their bra that was most upsetting. Asibow tried tugging up the cups to cover her exposes pink nipples to no avail. They were way too small for such bloated water balloons.

Few things could leave Flux completely dumbstruck as witnessing her beefy battle tank suddenly fill out with blubber. After a few seconds trying to make sense of this turn of events, the vixen came to another thought and glanced down at herself. Having already been built a bit chubby, it took a second to realize her own mammaries had inflated from melons to pumpkins seemingly without her notice. The already tight top had its front buttons pulled pucker trying to squish all the fat back. Instead, it was just forcing their cleavage to bulge upwards into the vixens chin. It was hard to see past the deep black canyon, but a quick feel under them confirmed her stomach went from a cute chubby to a saggy apron gut. A sudden draft sent her hands whipping back to tug the hem of her skit. Much like Asibow's bra, Flux's suddenly thicker butt was beyond such garments ability to provide cover. The colorful fur of her hip markings gleamed as she moved about in the torchlight.

Max gawked at the two fattened women moving stiffly in their efforts to adjust to such a sudden shift in size. He checked himself in a panic only to sigh at seeing how loosely his wizard robes still draped over his form. A hand absently came up to wipe the sweat off his face. Something about the contact made his palm freeze against one cheek slowly taking in what felt off about it. There was a lot more squish around the edges of his muzzle and pushing his chin to his neck glancing down produced an alarmingly prominent double chin.

A distraught mew brought the girls attention to their feline wizard. Just in time to watch Max heft the hem of robes to flash his stripes for them. The cream fur of his belly flopped out in a sag so deep it hid the crotch of his underwear, while its rim was stretched out over violently jiggling hips. Combined with the tree trunks of his thighs, Max had blimped into a drastically peared figure. Granted there was still some modest moob bumps going on around his stretched nipples. "W-what the hell happened to us?"

For a long time, the trio took turns looking from one to the other. Each time they thought the others had gained even more weight, but that could have just been the lighting. Eventually, the bindings around their hips began to give from their constant shuffling. Skits tore, underwear snapped, and protective plates collectively landed around their paws victims to their owners monstrously jiggling backsides.

Usually being the calmest by default, although this instance was really pushing her resolved, Flux was the first to have some form of theory. Glancing down at the bowl in her meatier paw, her eyes narrowed pensively at the bit of blue mess that remained. "It would seem we grossly underestimated the nature of our kills nourishment."

Max blinked, dropping his robe to at least get his corpulent form covered. "You're seriously saying we instantly tripled our body weight by eating slime?"

"Looked more like you quadrupled for being so skinny," Asibow said with a giggle. The fact she was still rubbing her belly with a look of delight made Flux raise an eyebrow. "Or is it quintupled? What's the technical term for five times?"

"Nevermind," Flux replied, unable to hold a giggle. "It seems logical to deduce that this dungeons breed of slimes has an incredibly high content of calories. Something about their nature to rapidly break down organic material must have accelerated our own digestion, leaving our inactive bodies no choice but to store the excess."

Max and Asibow looked at each other and shrugged.

"Wish we'd known this sooner. I really liked that plate mail."

"Mmph!" Max grunted as he licked his bowl clean of its remaining slime. Putting away his mess kit, the tiger could almost feel everything getting fatter as robes stretched to accommodate, especially around his rhino-tier backside. "So what do we do now? It's going to be hard to move that rubble like this."

"Bwarp!" A rather hard squeeze of her belly accidentally made Asibow belch in response. She continued rubbing up and down its curve, shaking off the light blush. "I dunno about you two, but I'm still hungry."

"Yes, that rapid a digestion really did not leave me with a sense of fulfillment either," Flux agreed. With a playful tail wag, the vixen once more turned to stare down the dark tunnel. "Our most likely chance of success is to simply proceed through the tunnels before us. Chances of encountering more slimes also seem highly likely."

Everyone's face twisted into a grin finding some motivation to continue their misadventure. They moved as fast as their widened bodies could collecting what gear still had a practical use. Of course, this was not met without more wardrobe problems.

Flux finished off the slime in her bowl only for the buttons of her top to snap off shortly after. She shrugged the useless garment off as breasts flowed down either side of her distended stomach like sloshing sandbags. Each footstep lost more dexterity, turning her gait into a waddle with her thickening thighs and hips.

Max bent to retrieve his pack only to hear a loud tear and experience a sudden cold breeze across his ass. Loud giggles came from his female companions when they turned to eye the shining white butt cheeks that had exploded out of his robes. As he stood up, Max realized the back had been completely rent from hem to collar, leaving all his sagging stripes exposed.

Asibow jiggled the harshest with her bouncing movements around the cave. She scooped up a stray glob of slime on impulse, licking the gauntlet clean of every drop. Shortly after she tried to grip her ax and found the flex completely shattered the gauntlets off bloating fat arms. Boots quickly followed, giving her inflating paw's some much-needed space for their swollen toes.

"Hope we don't regret losing this stuff later," Max lamented as he tore what remained of his robes off.

"Even in our current condition a slimes chances of threatening us is laughably minimal," Flux said in reassurance.

Asibow triumphantly raised her ax. "Bet I can eat more than you guys can!"

Trapped, naked, and now several times heavier than when they entered, the adventuring trio proceeded to walk, or waddle, deeper into the dungeon. Light from their lone torch guided the way while the promise of relief for their growling stomach kept spirits high.

***

At the end of the dinner table Desmond slowly sunk his face into his waiting palms. Despite trying to hide behind his Dungeon Master screens, the squirrel-foxes exasperation was evident to everyone around him. "I can't believe I'm awarding experience for you guys eating lunch."

"So do we find any more slimes?"

A few seconds of silence and Desmond finally recovered enough pride to raise his head. Eyes locked on to Max across the table before giving one curt nod.

"Yes, after a minute or two of waddling through the darkness, you reach an exit into a much bigger chamber. Immediately, you can tell this tunnel was not a natural formation but dug into the side of some kind of bricked underground hallway. Beyond it, you see a lot of jiggling mounds of smiling slimes. At least twenty of them are within view thanks to bioluminescent mushrooms growing out of the broken floors."

"Can I bullrush the nearest one!?" Asibow almost shouted in her excitement.

Desmond could only eye the larger goat woman with the same defeated stare he gave her last six rolls. The plan had been for them to ingestive a bit of slime, find it highly corrosive, and immediately give up the idea of devouring it raw. That would have at least added some tension to this rather plot-lacking dungeon crawl. But no, everyone had to succeed in both their resistance and constitution checks. Now Asibow's fighter was even addicted to the stuff, and the player version got into the role fast. She seemed intent on making her buff character as corpulent as her real-life one.

Before Desmond could even answer, a happy tail wag from Flux averted his attention. "Is it a full round, or standard action to eat a slime?"

"...standard," Desmond slowly answered. His shoulders rose and fell with a deep sigh. That helped calm him down enough to start dropping a handful of blue-colored stones onto the dry erase grid map at the center of the table. A plan was forming in his head with the new monster rules Flux's fantastic skill checks had forced him to improvise. "You know what, fine. Roll for initiative, you fatasses."

Let's see how these heroes get out of a dungeon when they're too fat to move.