Videos are on the way! (Patreon)

Hey everyone,

Just wanted to post something to update people and also slightly to hold myself accountable for work that I want to get done. I'm writing a lil short script about Pathologic that I'd really love to get done before I go for my FFS (although idk if that'll be possible, I might end up getting someone to edit it for me tbh) and I'm also going to record a few semi-scripted videos soon (which will definitely be edited by someone else) but basically I wanted you all to know that I'm writing a lot at the moment. 

I've been in a bit of a hole creatively for a little bit, with lots of projects that I'm really excited about but also that I want to do justice to, and with some personal crises going on that's made it really hard to make serious headway on any of them. I think writing is like a wild horse, and the way we first learned to tame horses was to spook them and walk to where they'd run off to and spook them again until they got tired out and were willing to be led. I feel like I've had my ability to write spooked a few times in the last year and fallen off the horse, and I've needed to spook it a few more times, and now I think the horse is willing to cooperate but totally out of energy. Nonetheless we're plodding along and hopefully soon there will be something. Hopefully soon there will be lots of stuff, actually.

I have to be real that anticipating my FFS is making it hard to film things, or more specifically hard to edit things, because I know that I'll have to look at the face I'm paying a lot of money to have dramatically changed very soon, but I also feel a lot of pain over that because I love sharing my essays and getting creative feedback on them, and I want to share the things I have written. My video about The Forgotten City has been sitting on my premiere timeline unedited for about 2 months now because I can't bring myself to do it.

This Pathologic essay is really good imo and I hope that you'll all like it a lot when it's done. It's essentially an exploration of the tension between the Dankovsky and Burakh playthroughs and why the ideas represented there are almost identical to the ideas in James C Scott's book Seeing Like a State. After this is done I think I need to be clever about how I balance my time between the bigger projects that I know need a lot of investment, research, and long term planning and my smaller projects, and learn to let those smaller projects be smaller and be lower effort in order to let my other work flourish.

For those who enjoy my writing in its writing form, stay tuned for an announcement semi-soon because I want to start a medium where I'll be posting some shorter essays and poetry as well.

I'm very excited about upcoming projects and I hope you will be just as excited to read them, to see them, and to share them with others. I think (I hope) I have important stuff to say that will actually help people.

Sophie x