Pip Judges The World: LA Edition (Patreon)

I have secretly been out for the last week for work, so that means it's time for another travelogue. This time, I turn my eye towards LA... and E3! Semi-coherent ramblings collected during the trip follow:

Day 1

An inauspicious start as my ride to the airport canceled on me shortly before they were supposed to arrive. What's the point of a reservation if you then tell me you “don't have a driver”?! In a hurry, I grabbed a cab and arrived at the airport far far too early. Quite bored before the flight even started, I finished a book and a half, did a few laps through the terminal, and ate a surprisingly decent chicken salad sandwich. The worked seemed shocked and thrilled when I said “please” and “thank you” to her so I'm guessing it had been a rough day all around. Power on, Sandwich Lady!

There's a musical cue for announcements or part of a song they keep playing and it sounds like the start of the Price is Right music. I'm either super into it or it's slowly driving me mad.

Unhappy airportings continue as the flight is plagued with multiple babies, the person next to me is spilling over into my seat, and the guy across from me is drumming on his cup/clicking a pen/stamping his feet while his (drunk?) girlfriend is going on about how important linguistics are to her so people can... people can... She repeats this at least a dozen times over the course of the trip and I never hear her actually finish the sentence.

There was a random dog on the flight and it was better behaved than most of the people. Can you just bring dogs on planes now? Not in a crate, it was just in this lady's lap.

Day 2

I was told by co-workers that the hotel breakfast was great only for it to be revealed that breakfast wasn't included with the room. Even potentially being able to expense meals through work, I can't justify a $24 breakfast. Granola bars will be the star of the mornings for this trip.

It's setup/showcase day so not much for me to do but kill the morning wandering around. LA is hot, extremely expensive, crowded, and smells like a mixture of pee, pot, and Axe body spray. I have quickly learned that I do not care for LA.

All of the nearby pizza joints are closed on Sunday. I have moved from not caring for LA to refusing to accept that it's a real city.

The showcase was a lot of fun. My boss was on stage, many claps were had, and we were told that the bottles of water were reserved for VIPs and I am not VI.

Day 3

More conferences, so more wandering around. 

Hiked over to the Doom painting and it was awesome. Nearby was an Indian restaurant, Mr. Masala. Also awesome. Damn good Tikka Masala and vegetable samosas. I will return for more later.

Went to see the company booth and do our walkthroughs. The convention center is oddly very poorly laid out and lacking in signage. I asked one of the workers how to get to the main hall and was told that they didn't know. Turns out I had to go up a staircase that was blocked off. Thanks, security guy, for knowing the convention better than the people paid to put on the show! The AC wasn't on and the air was thick with the numbing smell of paint, glue, and various building chemicals. That seems like a bad combination around machinery. 

The Capcom booth looks like it's going to have some nice merch.

Day 4

The pizza places are finally open. I head to a “NY” pizza place only to get a pie made with slices of cheese instead of grated and a lack of spices. They didn't even have a real pizza oven, it was just one of those roller ones. The cheese fell off as soon as I lifted a slice. My distaste for LA grows...

Convention time!

Capcom has such good merch! Reason wins in the end and I save my moneys.

Because I was working the show, I got to walk past all the lines and get into the hall right away. I felt a bit guilty about that (...but it was totally awesome).

E3 itself is... disappointing. So little of the convention center is companies actually showing off games. Most of it was retailers selling Funko Pops, gaming chairs, headphones, controller skins, the Army for some reason, and... Geico? This is not what I expected.

Most of the games being shown are all things that have already been announced (most of them announced a few years ago). 

If you're not willing to spend a few hours on line to play a 15 minute demo, you could easily see everything at E3 in under 4 hours.

Day 5

Another attempt at pizza and this is a greater success. Spices in the cheese! Sauce not too sugary! Good structural integrity! “Los Angeles NY Pizza” redeems the pizza scene. 

The show was super crowded even during the “press” time. I think they took a lot of liberties with who gets counted as press. I saw very little reporting and a whole lot of people taking selfies, filming themselves slowly wandering the show floor, and more people blocking the aisles to take selfies.

The VG Museum had a great exhibit. They had a JVC X'Eye! And a ton of playable arcade games. Weirdly, a lot of arcade exhibits at the show this year. 

The lines for FF7 and Cyberpunk were insane before the public was even let in. One of my coworkers waited in that Cyberpunk line for a looong time, only to find out it was a hands-off demo. I could sense sadness in his voice.

Day 6

Back to Mr. Masala for Butter Chicken and more samosas. Ventured the chicken samosas this time, but vegetable samosas still reign supreme. They remembered me from the other day, which usually freaks me out, but they were cool about it and the food was delicious.

7-Eleven had a truck giving out free mini-Slurpees. And they had the real blue kind! Not the Fanta blue kind. Not the Vitamin Water kind. The straight-up original blue raspberry!

Day 7

Cleanup day. Wandered the show floor a bit more. The people running the Luigi's Mansion space were wearing neon pink bellhop uniforms and I silently nod to them because they looked kind of fantastic. The lines are still crazy long.

I bid E3 good-bye.

Kind of wanted to go back for some final Indian food but played it safe before the flight and just went for sandwiches. It was supposed to be a chicken salad sandwich with walnuts and apple but there was a single thin slice of apple on only one half of the sandwich and a single chunk of walnut in the whole thing. LA!

The plane ride back also featured multiple dogs, all well-behaved. Absolutely adorable Golden Retriever puppy fast asleep that I very much wanted to pet but it was wearing its “guide dog in training” vest so I respected its work ethic.

Game stuff I saw:

Played a bit of the new Darksiders. It's... a dual stick shooter now? Strange choice.

Save the Date- This was super cute and the people at the booth were really nice so I'm giving shout-outs to Tough Cookie games. It's a customizable game to serve as a wedding notification/invitation. Novel, weird, and featured a sword-wielding bride as the playable character. Video games are kind of cool.

Hyperkin light gun- They found a way to make light guns work on HDTVs! I talked shop with the lead for a bit and it was neat stuff. He said it was just for the NES for now (they had Duck Hunt up and running), but they could grow the tech over time if it does well. If this means I can get Time Crisis 3 and 4 back, I'm all for it!

Death Loop- I'm happy they finally got to announce this. I went to an AI talk by the Arkane guys last year and they were all super nice. 

Destroy All Humans- They're weirdly going all in on this and they had a huge presence at the show. Outside the convention center, they had playable demos for the public, a huge inflatable Crypto head, people in Crypto costumes dancing, an enormous banner, and then a full booth in the show. Not too shabby for a decade old remake...

CrisTales- I know almost nothing about it but it was definitely one of the best things I saw at the show. Great art, time travel, and maybe some cute demon ladies? Looks great!

Picture time! (Taken from the setup day outside, I wasn't allowed to take pictures inside)

That Doom mural was super cool.

I'm happy to exclusively reveal that the Queer Eye team is headed to Gears 5!

Banners! And a random kind of monster truck? (I think there's a game where monster trucks fight zombies?)

Avengers banner! Just because.

7-Eleven delivered these to our hotel rooms. It was either a gift or a threat.