Coming Home Drunk (Patreon)

The first community reward from October that you voted for. In the future the votes will be polled and tailed half way through the month and the winning story/caption will be at the end of the same month.

 

Wife Point of View

Part I

“You’re unbelievable honestly; I mean just look at the state of you. Every single time you go out drinking with your buddies you come home absolutely trashed. It’s disgraceful, you promised me that once we got married that things would change but now look at you. I almost believed you to when you stayed sober for the wedding and the first few months after, but less than half a year you lasted. It’s not like I’m asking you to never touch alcohol again just use it in moderation, but you can’t even manage that. So maybe you shouldn’t drink again if you can’t control yourself. This wouldn’t happen if you let me come along with you on your boy’s nights, but nooooo, wives and girlfriends aren’t allowed to come. I’ve spoken with the other ladies and while they aren’t too keen on what you guys might be getting up to at least their partners don’t drink till they pass out. 

I don’t get it? Is it because you can’t handle your liquor like they can or do you just try to smash out as many drinks as you can to try and impress them. Personally I think it’s because you get drunk after just a few drinks. Why do I think that? Well there are a few other qualities of yours not quite up to standard. You know exactly what I’m referring to; it’s hanging between your legs as we speak. Yes it is definitely much smaller than average, I just haven’t spoken up about it before because I didn’t want you to feel inadequate. But tonight you’ve just made me so mad coming home and waking me up in the middle of the night because you’re stone cold drunk that I just don’t care if I embarrass you anymore. Maybe that’s why you act the way you do, you realize that you have a small penis and you show off to try and compensate and let everyone know how much of a man you are. I bet you tell all your mates how much sex we have and how you drive me crazy. You probably leave out the times when you’re so excited that you ejaculate all over the sheets before we’ve even gotten past the foreplay. 

Look, don’t get upset if it bothered me that much I wouldn’t have married you would I. I love you for who you are, minus your obsession for alcohol. Can you imagine how much less we would argue if you only listened to me more? Actually the more I think about it you don’t really help around the house enough. You’re always leaving dirty clothes for me to wash and dirty dishes in the sink. Yes you do help out but not to the extent that we’re contributing an even amount. It would be fantastic if you helped with dinner more often especially because I’m the one working Monday to Friday and you only work part time. Microwaving leftovers is not preparing dinner, so don’t you dare even suggest that’s helping. Especially when it was me that cooked those meals in the first place. 

What’s the matter why are you squirming around so much? No, you can’t get up; if I let you go you will just pass out on the bed. I’m not stupid; you can sit there until I’ve finished berating you. Maybe some of the things I tell you will actually stick and you will remember them when you wake up. Stop moving around so much and concentrate on what I am trying to say. You look ridiculous, like a toddler doing the potty dance because he’s about to pee his……. Wow, just wow. You actually pissed yourself all over the sofa. I hope you’re happy because you can pay to get that cleaned. Stand up now before you make it any worse then you already have. Unbelievable honestly, it’s like I married a baby. Now take off your wet clothes and leave them in a pile I will be right back. DO NOT sit back down on the furniture. 

I can’t believe I’m drying the piss off my husband’s legs because he’s too drunk to do it himself. I think it’s time we made some changes around here. Clearly you aren’t mature enough for your role as husband in the relationship. I’ve let you be in charge of things because you always seemed to want to have the leadership role. You never did a great job of it though lets be real here. I was the one that would always plan our holidays and I’m the one that drives because you’re horrible at following directions. I think it’s clear that I wear the pants in our relationship. Now I’ve put the kitchen chair in the corner of the room and removed the cushion. I want you to sit there on the cold wooden seat bear bottomed until I return from the 24/7 pharmacy down the road. It’s none of your business why I’m going there, all you have to worry about is not moving from that chair understood? Because If I get home and find out you’ve moved even one foot off that chair then I will bend you over it and BELT your ass until its bright red. DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR? Good, I’m glad you’re finally starting to listen now sit here and don’t move I’ll be right back.”

PART II

“Wow, I can’t believe you managed to actually stay there the whole time. I’m so proud of my wittle baby husband. Why am I calling you a baby? Well you did just piss your pants in front of me and now you’re sitting on a time out stool. It doesn’t matter that you’re doing it because I told you too, that just makes you more childish. Listening to mummy like a good baby boy that’s what you are. You can get off that seat now; look what I bought you from the store. Aren’t they adorable, extra thick and absorbent adult diapers! When I went in there I originally was just going to get you the plain ones but the clerk and I got talking and she recommended these ones. Apparently there are people who enjoy wearing them so they make large versions of their baby diapers which they sell online and keep out the back of the store. Just look at the cute animal print its perfect for someone like you. 

Yes you will be wearing them from now on don’t even try arguing with me about it. Unless you want a divorce this is how things are going to be from now on. You will be kept in diapers around the clock and you will be expected to use them. No more bathrooms for you anymore Mr, if you need a change you can tell me. I expect after time you won’t even realize you need to go any more so when that happens I will start checking you but until then I want you to tell me when you’re wet or messy. If I find you in a dirty diaper and you knew about it and didn’t tell me then I’ll give you the biggest whopping of your life. Don’t cry this is what’s best for you. It’s not like you still can’t go out drinking, it just means from now on you will have a thick thirsty diaper between your legs. You just have to look at the positives, no more accidents! You might want me there with you though because let’s be honest, at the rate you drink this will probably start leaking early into the night. 

I can bring a diaper changing bag with me and when you need it we can find a nice private spot somewhere. Look, I promise to be discrete as possible but these are so thick and crinkly there’s only so much you can do to hide them. I’ll go back to the store and get you thinner ones for when you go to work. But if you leak then we’ll have no choice to put you in the thick ones and they will definitely show through your work pants. I’m sure they won’t fire you for having to wear diapers. I can speak to the receptionist we get along really well. I can ask her to keep an eye on your diapers for you and change you if you need it. Don’t be so bashful I’m sure she won’t mind she’s confided with me in the past about having a strong domination streak; this will feed into that perfectly. Now come along no more dawdling it’s time to lie down for your first diaper change. Who knows, maybe sometime in the future if you show an improvement in maturity we can talk about letting you grow up again. But we won’t worry about that for some time, for now you’re just going to be mummy’s little diaper boy.”