Home
Artists
Search Recent Random
Posts
Search DMs Popular Hash Lookup Tags Random
Importer
Import FAQ
Register
Partychan Matrix ThePornDude
Home Artists Posts Import Register
Patreon importer is back online! Tell your friends ✅

58 - Shandy, English version (Patreon)

Published:
2024-08-30 17:30:37
Imported:
2024-11
Tags:

Content

Wasn't planning on doing this initially, but it seems I need to work on my JP workflow. Thank you all for your feedback!

White - https://mega.nz/file/7NQwEYxQ#ddVHoGUUQEzQc14r2PtnlhNV5xVgONeFG8GYpTLW39Y
Black - https://mega.nz/file/zJJAUJZJ#EuuhGt7jUOputg8kVJtnWrteil9a70RW3BZnSzL7eMk
Barefoot - https://mega.nz/file/aYYgzYTR#nR0cxMT7ENlaiDv74jdbB6j14xtsp8OYgJveHPlkte8

Files

Comments

Th3_InDian

I hope the VA didn't get discouraged. I know she can improve. I gave my feedback as best as I could. If the feedback feels too vague, I can always try and pinpoint moments in particular that sounded off to me. Anyway - the english version is solid!

BigBrute

If you decide to do more redubs in English in the future, my unsolicited advice (as someone who has commissioned voice work many times) would be to ditch the subtitles entirely for the English version. You could work with the VA to come up with a script that captures the same intent/mood in English but without adhering to the exact phrasing of the English subtitles. This could allow the delivery to sound more natural, and give the VA more flexibility in using lines that sync better to the mouth movements (assuming you'd rather avoid reanimating those). If it's not too much work, you could add subtitles as their own stream to the final video, so the user could choose to enable it if they need it or disable it if they find it distracting. While I agree with Th3_InDian that this version sounds better, there are still some line reads that sound a bit off or not particularly convincing. For example, "You'd better not make a mess at my bar..." is delivered a little too nonchalant, perhaps motivated by the line ending with ellipses. In my opinion, the delivery should be a little more stern, but playful, by adding some emphasis to the word "better," like "You'd BETTER not make a mess at my bar." The added emphasis could be subtle, but I think it would go long way to making it sound convincing. "Pushing your bartender under the table..." doesn't sound great, either. It almost feels like too much importance was placed on making it sound sultry, and making the line sound natural was sacrificed to that end. It's delivered pretty flat, with her tone not changing much throughout the line. To make it sound teasing (which I assume is the intent here), I think the line calls for a bit more change in inflection, like the end could trail up, almost as if she's saying it in feigned disbelief: "I can't BELIEVE you would DO such a thing..." That kind of energy, but obviously more subtle. There's other examples, but I think you get the idea. I don't want to come across as overly negative, since these are largely nitpicks, so I'll end with this: the animation is stellar, and I love the mood you created with it. The teasing, the anticipation, it's all there in spades. Even though the details in line delivery could use work, the VA did a good job of capturing this mood in two different languages, which is very impressive on its own.

lewdgazer
>>148042786

Wowwww, thank you for this! I am gonna try to do Japanese again in the future, but the redub was more of an uhhh... spontaneous decision. Hopefully it doesn't become a tradition. I was debating for a while whether to keep the subs or not, but in the end, I figured they're already setup on my end, so no harm including them. You've got a point tho, soft subs probably would've been the best call. As for the lipsync, I'm honestly not sure if it could be possible to adjust the script to fit the lipsync for another language - and I don't mind redoing it anyhow, I need the practice. Agreed on the delivery of some lines. I'm still learning how to direct different VAs properly and, even if I can hear that something isn't quite right, I find it a bit difficult to put my thoughts into usable feedback. Your write-up helps a lot in that regard! Plus... I know when my own work is "good enough" and I can stop polishing, but it's harder to know that threshold when working with others. Vixxen was super accommodating with all my feedback, so maybe I should've pushed her more. 🤔 Thank you very much again. Such detailed feedback really helps. 🙏

lewdgazer
>>148034022

She seems fine - but I'm sure knowing that my patrons are thinking of her will help. 😊 The biggest issue is that we're not quite sure yet how to avoid the same issues. I'll commission a proper translator for the JP script next time, but I'm lost in regards to JP pronunciation and such.

BigBrute
>>148042786

Happy to provide feedback if you find it useful! Regarding the point about adjusting the script to fit the lipsyncing, I totally get what you're saying. My point wasn't that you should rewrite the script from scratch to make it sync up perfectly, but allowing the voice lines to deviate from the script used for the subtitles could give a VA some headroom to make changes if lip syncing becomes awkward. Like if the original line is just too many syllables in English, it could be rephrased to be shorter without losing the meaning. In this case, it may not matter too much since most of Shandy's lines are spoken when her lips aren't in frame, but it can be helpful in the future! And I totally know what you mean regarding voice direction being tough. It's often hard to realize you were expecting something to sound a certain way until you hear it NOT sound that way, at which point I often feel bad for making them do a retake just because I wasn't specific enough, haha. Glad to hear Vixxen is receptive to feedback and willing to do retakes - that's invaluable if you're still relatively new to voice directing.

lewdgazer
>>148042786

Argghhhhh that exact thing happens a lot to me too 😭 Already learned to be a lot more specific with my directions, but sometimes my expectations are just wrong too. When you think you want it to sound a certain way, and the VA delivers, but it still doesn't turn out quite right anyway.

Th3_InDian
>>148034022

Maybe you fellas could watch DOAXVV Museum's Shandy character episodes in youtube. Or watch some H with mature women for reference. Might help when you compare the lines in this animation to ones that are similar or almost identical ones in other works. Obviously, I'm not saying Vixxen should mimic Shandy's VA as closely as possible, that would be silly. More along the lines of "get a better feel for some pronunciations".

lewdgazer
>>148034022

We did exactly that, actually! Character episodes are great for VAs to quickly get a feel for what they should be going for. But I'm guessing it goes a bit deeper than that when it comes to pronunciation. Japanese be hard.