Stealing Hearts- Part 1 (Patreon)

After the mysterious disappearance of Sly Cooper, no one would be more surprised than Carmelita Fox to see him reappear on a beach- as the biggest stud she's ever seen, and leading her on yet another game. Enjoy, folks, and see you next month!

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Carmelita Fox had not had a proper vacation for a long time- as one of the most decorated officers for Interpol, she had been wearing herself thin for years. She had been on the trail of the notorious Sly Cooper for years, coming agonizingly close to arresting him several times, and even falling for his charms more times than she wanted to admit. Then, after a perilous showdown with the criminal kingpin Le Paradox, Sly had simply disappeared. It had been a year since that last battle, and Carmelita had to keep chiding herself not to think about Sly. Even in Cozumel, where she was supposed to be relaxing on sandy white beaches, she kept seeing his striped tail slip around the corner, or his face in a window's reflection, or even on strangers- Wait.

Carmelita shot up from her lounge chair as someone passed her by. She wasn't normally taken in by oiled up muscles and sun-tanning hunks, but this one, she had to take notice of- if only because of just how huge he was. He was as powerfully built as a tank; his trunk-sized legs hit the sand and made soft tremors where he stepped. His torso was as finely sculpted as a statue of a greek god- chiseled, brick-sized abs stacked tightly against one another, framed by lats as heavy and large as wings, all cast in the shadow his enormous cliff-face of a chest made. His arms rippled whenever he moved them, powerful swells of muscle surging with even subtle movements. He was a work of art- he was like a figure out of myth and legend.

He was Sly.

The fluffy, striped tail, the raccoon's mask and fur pattern, Carmelita knew instantly, this was Sly. That smirk, that damned smirk, couldn't hide behind the crest of those oversized pecs- she knew Sly when she saw him. Their eyes met for just a moment, and that smirk widened as Sly winked at her. What did he do to himself? He was three times the size Carmelita knew him to be, and looked like he had ten times the strength, at least.

The fox nearly tripped over herself rushing to meet up with the titan of a raccoon. "Hey! Hey! Over here, you big lug!"

Finally, Sly turned around. "Well, hello there, gorgeous," he started, leaning against a lifeguard stand and blocking out the sun. His voice was just as smooth and sleek as it always was, but had dropped an octave. Carmelita felt her tail fluff up, but she shoved it back down.

"Sly, what are you doing? What did you do? Look at you! You- you look like a… a…"

"A… a… what?" the raccoon chuckled, his pecs bouncing. "A god? An action star?" He raised his arm, his bicep swelling up like a beachball. "A dream come true? I've heard it all before, babe, and lemme tell you- it's all true." He held out his hand. "The name's Sloane, by the way. Sloane Cooper."

Carmelita's eyes darted between the raccoon's confident smile and his huge bicep, trying hard to keep her focus. "Sloane? Uh-huh." she narrowed her eyes. "And I suppose the name Sly Cooper doesn't mean anything to you?"

"Wow," the raccoon's smirk slipped. "That's spooky. I haven't heard that name in years. I used to be called that when I was growing up- before I got into working out."

"What?" Carmelita sputtered. "No, no- you are Sly Cooper, the thief wanted in twenty countries! We've been doing this dance for years, Cooper, and I've heard some pretty lame stories from you, but this one takes the cake."

The raccoon blinked for a moment, his smile slipping entirely. "Are… you alright, ma'am? A little too much sun?"

"A little too much sun? A little too much sun?" Carmelita spat. "I've been looking for you for over a year! I thought you were dead. I was actually worried about you, you- you big, stupid jerk!" Carmelita snapped, and punched him in the chest- but it barely made a dent in that wall of muscle.

"Sloane" grabbed Carmelita's wrists, easily overpowering her, but only to lower her arms. "Easy, easy! Look, miss, you're clearly upset. Why don't we get you something to drink?" Perhaps thinking she was suffering from heat exhaustion, the raccoon gently, but firmly, led Carmelita to a beach bar, where everyone perked up as they spotted the raccoon- men raised their glasses and beer bottles in salute, and women swooned as Sloane clicked his tongue and winked, giving them a quick flex with a free arm.

"Get off of me!" Carmelita slapped off Sloane's hand, her irritation spiking as she saw all the other people staring hungrily at him. "I can walk to a bar on my own."

Still, despite her instincts of instantly calling in for back-up to book Sly, she stayed and sat down next to the hulking raccoon, slowly drawn to rest her cheek against his boulder shoulder- because of the heat exhaustion, of course.

"So we got off on the wrong foot," Sloane started. "I'm Sloane, and you are…?"

The fox paused, working on her drink- "Sloane" hadn't asked, but it was a pina colada, with a pineapple wedge and a strawberry instead of a cherry- her favorite. A favorite Sly Cooper would know. "...Roxana. Roxana Vultega."

She studied Sly's face. There was a very slight flicker in the raccoon's easygoing smile- like he wasn't expecting that answer. "That's a lovely name."

Alright, they were playing games. Carmelita turned around, sipping at her drink while batting her eyelashes. "You know… I do feel much better. I'm sorry about earlier…" she played things more demure and flirty, drawing her fingers over the contours of the procyon's immense form. "So how did a raccoon like you get so big? You've got to be the most muscular person I've ever seen."

Sloane grinned, tensing his arm as her fingers traced over his tricep, forcing them apart as they traversed over a mass of muscle big as a boogie board. "Well, you know… lots of hard work, loads of protein."

"And what inspired you? People don't get the willpower to turn themselves into such an awe-inspiring colossus just on a whim," she asked, just to see how far Sly's story went.

"Oh, well," Sloane sniffed, turning around in his seat to lean against the bar, letting his swollen lats spread out and his chest stretch. "I grew up in an orphanage, and got a few hard knocks- so I wanted to be big and strong enough to give some hard knocks back, y'know? Had a little gang with my friends- you should've seen one of them, a hippo-"

"Murray?" Carmelita supplied flatly.

"...Merv. Actually." Sloane said bluntly. "He, uh. He was super sneaky- could get away with anything. Wouldn't expect it from a hippo."

"I'll bet." Carmelita slid off her seat and planted her hand on the raccoon's chest, leaning in. "I'm feeling refreshed, Sloane. And I'll admit, you are easily the most impressive guy I see here. Why don't you and I go out and have some fun?"

The raccoon pushed back, forcing the fox a few steps back. "I'm up for some fun, Roxy."

"Good. My car's up ahead." She led Sloane to the parking lot, but cursed when she saw her cruiser was blocked in by an oversized pick-up truck.

"Cabron!" she spat. "I saw the guy who was driving this," she said, turning to Sly. "I shut him down when he tried flirting with me on the side of the road. This must be him being petty."

The raccoon looked at the truck and smirked. "Well… let's be petty back." He lumbered over to the vehicle and squatted down, giving the fox an uninhibited view of his round, sculpted glutes and engorged hamstrings. Gripping the chasis hard enough to dent the metal, he let out a surprisingly bestial growl that made Carmelita's tail fluff up again. With a clean move, he hoisted the truck up into the air, his mammoth arms tensed and the tectonic plate of a back surging from the effort. With a teeth-clenched grunt he threw the truck over the other rows of the parking lot, and right into a sand dune.

Carmelita's jaw dropped. This wasn't just another disguise for Sly- that muscle was all real. But how? How did he get so big in only a year? "That's… illegal," she finally blurted out, too dumbstruck to think of anything else.

"Well, so was blocking you in- fair's fair, right?" the raccoon opened the car door for Carmelita. "So… we still up for some fun?"

"Yeah…" She didn't know where to look- the hulking Adonis of a raccoon, or the half-buried truck he had just thrown like a volleyball. "Yeah, let's have some fun."

"Fun" for Carmelita was a bit more intense- she took Sly to a martial arts complex where she could let off some steam, and test the limits of his new strength. She wasn't one of the most decorated Interpol officers for nothing- she hit hard and fast, and had years of combat experience under her belt. Sly had very rarely faced her in direct, hand-to-hand combat, because he knew she would have the upper hand.

That wasn't the case anymore. She definitely got a few wins in, but Sly's strength now really was overwhelming- most of her hits barely registered, and her wins came from outmaneuvering him instead of overwhelming him. She was put through the workout of her life- and she was starting to love it. Maybe it wasn't so bad to let him be Sloane… and for her to be Roxana. Kickboxing was followed by dinner- "Sloane" insisted on paying, not out of an old-fashioned sensibility, but because he was going to end up eating a meal that could feed four- those muscles weren't built on thin air and empty calories, after all. Then, "Roxana" invited him back to her hotel room, for some more "fun."

It was about ten in the morning when Carmelita woke up. She groaned, lying in a slightly awkward position on two accounts- one, "Sloane" had gone and broken the bed frame, almost cratering it; two, she was handcuffed to the bedpost- part of last night's "fun."

"Mm…" she tried twisting around, propping herself up with a pillow. "Look, Sly… last night was fun, but I think it's time we both…" she stopped, looking around the hotel room, "...drop the act."

There weren't many places for a juggernaut raccoon to hide in her room. Slowly, realization dawned and she cursed under her breath- he had given her the slip, again. How could he still be so sneaky when it looked like he weighed half a ton? She twisted around again, one hand still handcuffed, but another free to grope around the bedside table, and her fingers reached purchase on the room's phone. But before she called the front desk, she spotted a note written on the back of some stationery.

"Roxy"-

Last night was more fun than our usual run-ins. We should do it again some time. Just   make sure to work on your left-hook- I barely felt it in the last round.

-S

PS- You don't mind if I borrow the key to your handcuffs, do you?

Carmelita swore up a storm as she angrily called the front desk, demanding room service get up to her room with a hacksaw. Left stewing while the hotel staff scrambled, she glanced back down at Sly's note, and she gasped as something caught her eye. Finally, he had made a mistake. The stationery wasn't the hotel's- it looked like it had been crumpled up, something he had left in a bag before using it as scrap paper for his note. It belonged to the Iron Will Gym- and Carmelita was already looking it up to start her raccoon hunt.