Chapter 54: I’m shocked! (pikachu face) (Patreon)
Content
(Sorry I am a bit late. I had an asthma attack yesterday and went to the doctor. he gave me something akin to a steroid (which made up of almost all percentage of the drug) and my body felt extremely tired as the med worked to strengthened my lungs. That means, puking, body temperature rising, and headaches. Luckily, I just need another day to finish the meds. I will be going slow in writing for the next two day, but I will make sure to finish one chap a day. Enjoy the chapter~!)
[Third Person POV]
20 minutes before the surprise party.
"The fishing line has been set, now it's time for the lure." Phil muttered after Cam showed him a thumbs up gesture while he was on the call with Pepper. Most of the family members were in the kitchen, while the kids and the guests were in the living room.
Jay sighed and said, "You put the lure first before casting the line."
"It’s just a metaphor, Jay." Manny interjected with a glass of milk in his hand, and a milk moustache on his face.
"Ay Papito! Why are you drinking milk now?! Why don’t you wait for the party?!" Gloria snatched the glass from Manny’s hand.
"I’m drinking to forget mom. My broken heart needs some healing after Hannah Montana shot me down in the cafeteria today after my confession."
"ALL I NEED'S A LITTLE LOVE IN MY LIFE!" exclaimed Phil.
"Phil! Stop that. Go bring the confetti out of the garage." Claire walked past Jay with a cake box in her hand. "Hold on, what kind of cake did you buy?" Jay stopped Claire from rushing in for inspection.
"You know, this whole thing is last minute. I can only get lemon cake." Claire said it carefully.
"Lemon?" Jay asked in confusion.
"Lemon?" Manny scrunched his face in disgust.
"Orange?" Phil suddenly walked in from his trip to the closet with pop crackers in each of his fingers.
"Phil! That’s dangerous! And where is the confetti?!" Claire said in frustration.
"I will be getting it now. I just need some ammunition to guard against the raccoon family there." Phil replied.
"You guys have a raccoon?" Manny asked. "I saw Jay run away from a racoon once."
"Why don’t you go join the rest of the kids?" Jay pushed Manny gently from behind to get him moving as he continued to disrupt the adults' conversations.
Claire smirked, but she didn’t tease her dad as she needed to shout at Phil first. "Put the popcracker down. There aren't any raccoons in there! I checked!"
"Fine. But I’m bringing Luke with me as an ally." Phil said before wanting to put the pop cracker down, but Luke appeared out of nowhere, startling Phil.
"I heard someone call my name."
As Phil was startled, he accidentally dropped the pop-cracker in front of him and Claire who were facing each other.
*POP* *POP* *POP* *POP* *POP* *POP*
The mini explosions around Claire’s feet caused her to jump back in fear and the cake box to slide from her hand. Jay tried to grab the cake box, but it was too late.
"NOOO!" Phil screamed in slow motion as he jumped forward to grab the cake.
BAM!
The cake box fell perfectly on the ground, and only the top of the box was opened, revealing a decorated yellow icing cake with Edward’s name on it. But, before anyone could get relieved, Phil couldn’t stop his momentum and fell on top of the cake, flattening it and splattering the cake in all directions.
Claire gasped while Jay facepalmed himself as Phil slowly realized what he had done. His face turned ashen while Luke said in excitement, "That was awesome."
Alex and Haley walked into the kitchen at the same time before Alex asked the question. "What happened?"
Both of them gasped at the same time as they saw their dad still trying to get up from the floor with a circular cake shaped mess on his shirt.
"Dad! What have you done?!" Haley asked in a horrified voice. "What are we going to eat now?! We don’t have anything else?!"
"I-I-I-I…" Phil stuttered, and then Cam and Mitch entered the kitchen together with Gloria.
"Ay, Phil, what happened?!" Gloria helped Phil get up from the floor, but then Phil slipped on the cream nearby and fell to the ground once more.
Cam screamed in a high-pitched voice, "OH MY GOD, PHIL!"
Claire helped Phil stand up at this time, and she massaged her throbbing forehead from her frustration.
"What are we going to do now?" Cam asked anxiously.
"I will tell you what I’m going to do. I will go outside to the backyard to make sure I get far away from this mess." Jay said and tried to walk outside before Gloria grabbed his arm and said, "You’re not going anyway, mister. We’re going to put our heads together and clean up this mess!"
"Gloria…" Jay tried to protest, but Gloria just gave him a glare to shut him up.
Suddenly, another adult that wasn’t related to the family walked into the kitchen.
"Hey Claire. You didn’t answer my question about the cake, therefore I just picked it up when I got home from work." Ted said this while holding a box of cake and still wearing his captain's uniform.
"A HERO!" Phil said and tried to walk towards Ted to give him a hug before Claire shouted, "NO! You stay here and clean this up. Kids, your dad needs a shower, so use him as a mop to clean up this mess."
Luke was excited while Alex and Haley rolled their eyes before answering their mom, "Okay. We will do it."
Claire walked toward Ted and asked, "Did you decorate it? What kind of cake is this?"
"Edward’s favorite. Chocolate cake." Ted said, placing the cake box on the kitchen counter before opening it.
"Alex, keep an eye on your brother. Make sure he doesn’t touch the cake." Claire said this before she rushed to the living room. Alex glared at Luke while he said, "What? I’m not going to steal Ed’s cake again. He will add to my punishment if I do it."
In the living room, Jenna, Elsa, Tara, Abby, and Jacob were helping the family decorate the living room with balloons and colourful streamers for Edward’s birthday party preparations.
Abby was cutting up some decoration paper to make a string of human origami on one side of the room while Elsa and Jacob were sitting on the sofa. Jenna and Tara were by the fireplace, trying to stick the streamer to the ceiling using a ladder.
"Here." Elsa was handing over the balloon for Jacob to blow. She just sat beside him and complimented him every time he did a good job, without actually doing any work herself.
"Bitch. Blow the balloons too. Or are you keeping your blowing energy for another purpose?" Jenna admonished Elsa while she was helping Tara stick the steamer on the ceiling. Abby and Jenna kept glancing at each other while being cautious of one another.
"Pfff- Jacob. You’ll be so lucky tonight as your girlfriend is saving her energy just for you." Tara said playfully, making both Jacob and Elsa blush.
"I-I’ll blow the balloon too." After being teased, Elsa finally started working. But then, Jacob took the balloon out of her mouth and said, "Don’t tire yourself. I can do it all on my own."
"But-"
"You just need to stay there while looking pretty to give me strength." Jacob smiled innocently, causing Elsa to blush and hide her face from him by turning to the side. "Dummy." Elsa said while smiling from ear to ear.
Jenna rolled her eyes and threw a crumpled streamer towards Jacob and Elsa. Claire passed by and said, "Okay. He’s going to be here any minute now. How’s the decoration?"
"Almost done, Mrs. Dunphy." Tara replied.
"Yeah. We’re almost done too." Jacob answered.
"I did it." Abby said this while showing her origami paper.
"Give me." Tara said and they put the human origami on the fireplace.
"Okay. I need someone to look out the window and tell us when Edward is here." Claire said after storing the ladder..
"I’ll do it." Elsa said as she walked to the front door and peered through a small window. "Hey, the car is here." she said in less than 10 seconds she became the lookout.
"Come on," Gloria clapped her hands together as she returned to the living room. "Vamanos! We need to get ready! After he walk in, we yell ‘surprise’. Okay?"
"In position everyone!" Claire said. The rest of the family moved towards the living room. All of them were there. Even Lily was there in Cam’s arms. Except for Phil.
"Shushh~!" Claire shushed the group as they hid their presence while crouching behind the sofa and other places that couldn’t be seen when Edward walked through the front door.
"Mitch. Open it." Claire said.
"Why me?" Mitch asked in confusion.
"Because, you’re a lawyer. You lie for a living. Go and open the door now." Claire said.
"For your information, I’m an environmental lawyer-"
""" GOO!! """ All of the people there said at the same time. Mitchell finally gave up and went to open the door without realising that Phil was just getting downstairs with a party hat on his head.
Mitch opened the door with a smile after hearing the knocks, and said, "Hi Ed. What brings you here?"
[Edward POV]
"...You called me here?" I replied as I saw Phil standing frozen on the stairs with a party hat on his head. He quickly tried to take it off, but he forgot about the rubber strap on the neck and accidentally choked himself as he did it hurriedly.
"Phil. Go upstairs!" Claire said it with a whisper that was audible to my ear. ‘Am I supposed to pretend I didn’t hear it?’ I thought.
"Mitchell. How are you?" Pepper intrudes on the house and kisses Mitchell on the cheeks, godfather style before whispering something to Mitch. "He knows."
Mitchell was startled before he said anxiously, "Edward. Come on in. Cam is at the back."
As I walked into the house, everyone popped out from behind their hiding spot and cheered happily, "SURPRISE! EDWARD, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"
With a monotone voice, I said, "Wow. You guys did this all for me. I didn’t expect this in the least." I took out a handkerchief I prepared from my pocket and pretended to be wiping away my tears of happiness.
The group was happy as they thought that they had been successful in their surprise. Phil rushed down the stairs to join in the celebration and hugged me to wish me a happy birthday.
"He’s lying. He knows." Abby caught onto my act immediately after she studied all of my facial expressions as I reacted to the surprise.
"Ehhh~!" The group exclaimed in bewilderment as the secret was out.
"Did you know it when you saw Phil with the hat?" Manny asked. Everyone looked at Phil, making him nervous.
"No. He knows the moment I give him the invite." Pepper came to Phil's aid when he noticed the man was pale.Phil finally breathed in relief and said, "Anyway. Let’s sing him the song."
""" Happy Birthday to you~"""
My dad came out with the cake filled with 14 lit up candles slowly from the kitchen to where I was standing.
"Make a wish Ed." Claire said after the song was finished.
‘I hope this thing will be over soon.’ I blew out all of the candles while still maintaining a fake smile.
…
Time at the party flew by. Meaningless conversation, birthday wishes, opening presents, finally, I sat down at an empty seat to eat a slice of chocolate cake to rest a little.
"Jay, the website is done. Pick me up at school tomorrow, I will go to set up the defence and connect the website to your company system." I said casually while taking a spoonful of cake.
"Really? That’s fast. You didn’t slack on your job didn’t you?" Jay asked teasingly but with a hint of concern while sitting down and eating cake the same way that I was doing.
"Even if I’m slacking, it won’t be hard for your website to become the most advanced website in the world. You just need to wait for an award for the best closet company at Expo Internationale du Closet."
Jay scoffed and said, "Kid. You’re too green in the closet industry. Do you know how competitive it is to get to the Expo? You need to give 100% effort and work for decades-"
"Dad. Stop boring him." Mitchell interjected quickly before Jay could go on a full rant.
"Well. If your company is paving the way with your capabilities right now, it might be hard. But what if your company invents a few products that will revolutionise the closet industry? For example, a Whisper Glider on the drawers to cut down on CN."
"How do you know CN?" Jay asked in confusion.
"What’s CN?" Mitchell asked.
"Industry jargon for closet noise." I answered.
[Jay’s Commentary]
"In less than a month, that kid managed to learn almost all of the closet’s industry know-how, and make a few inventions of his own? I don’t believe it…" Jay said it with some apprehension.
Then, with a nervous expression on his face, he said, "But what if...and that is a big "IF"...What if he really did it? I mean…I know that kid is a genius. Could it be that he had really invented something so advanced? Something... that will take Pritchett’s Closet to a greater height? We will become an industry legend if that’s true."
[Commentary ends.]
The reason I had been using my future knowledge to tempt Jay was because I had poached her daughter who would one day bring the company to even greater heights. Therefore, I felt bad for him.
‘But. Claire is too important in my future plans, and has proven herself by becoming an integral part of my company in less than a month. I wouldn’t let Jay take her away from me after I had trained her and given her confidence back.’ I thought as I munched on the cake.
I sat aside the empty plate and said, "Not only that. I had also figured out a mechanism for alternating socks instead of just picking the socks at the top of your drawers."
"What do you want, kid?" Jay finally decided to gamble on my words as he saw my confidence.
"What is happening here?" Claire approached Mitchell as she felt the tense atmosphere between Jay and I.
"Shush Claire. They are negotiating." Mitchell said.
"So you want me to rent the patent? And share the profit with you?" Jay said while crossing his legs and smoking a Cuban cigar.
Claire walked between Jay and I, snatched the cigar out of Jay’s mouth and said, "No shop talk. It’s a birthday party. And dad, there are children here. What are you thinking?!"
Jay grimaced before he stood up and said, "We’ll continue this later. Bring your lawyer too."
"Sure. Tomorrow at 4?"
"Okay. I’ll send someone to pick you up from school."
"Or you know. I could do it." Claire interjected. She turned toward me and said, "Go talk to your friends."
"I already did." I said it with some trepidation about the situation.
"No objections. Go." Claire urged me to go mingle.
"Why so pouty? It's like you don't want to celebrate your birthday." Abby asked after I sat next to her on the couch in the living room.
"Can I tell you a secret?" I said.
"What?" Abby turned her face to look at mine in intrigue. She no longer wore thick eyeliner or a black lipstick, and if she didn’t wear a black and white outfit, no one would even think that she used to be a goth girl.
"I hate celebrating my birthday." As I watched Luke tease the kind giant Jacob, I smiled slightly and said honestly.
Abby was stunned for a while before she said, "Wait. Seriously?"
"Yup."
"But why?"
I sighed as I reminisced about my past birthdays, both in this world and the previous one.
As the orphanage I used to be in was struggling financially, no one cared about the kids' birthdays over there. If we managed to have 2 meals a day, that was enough celebration for the orphans.
When I was kicked out of the orphanage, I couldn’t care less about my birthday. It was not until I met grandma that she celebrated my birthday for the first time in my entire life, but it was less than a year later that I had lost her too.
In this world, my birthday and the classical music competition usually fall in the same week. My parents would just give me a present, and my mother would promise me to celebrate my birthday later on, but after 5 years, I gave up on any hope that she would fulfil her promise.
‘Dad did bring me someplace special for my birthday a few times. Just the two of us... That was nice, but now my birthday just feels like any other day.
Of course, I couldn’t tell Abby the true reason. Therefore, I lied and said, "It just seemed childish."
Abby was stunned for a while before she pouted and whispered to herself, "Liar."
"Hey Ed. What do you want for your birthday?" Jenna suddenly sat next to me and asked. The three-seat sofa was now full with me in the middle, and two gorgeous girls by my side.
A few metres away from me, Manny swirled the glass of milk in his hand and muttered, "Why can’t I get girls like that? Should I pick up an instrument too? Does the flute count?"
Alex, who was walking by at the time, stopped and stared at Manny before answering his question. "No." Then, she walked away, leaving behind a stunned Manny.
"I don’t need anything luxurious. A spa session would be good enough." I said.
"That thing cost around 250 dollars though." Abby muttered softly.
"Okay~!" Jenna agreed happily as there were lots and lots of spa session certificates at her house. She could just pick one of them and give it to me.
Haley approached our sofa and wiggled her way next to Abby while saying, "Excuse me."
"Ed. What did Taylor give you?" She asked.
"Ahh. She gave me a guitar." I said with a hint of excitement on my face. It was a custom made Taylor PS-14CE Grand Auditorium acoustic guitar with an inscription on it.
"I believe she gave me a Taylor guitar on purpose, but I can't contact her right now to talk to her... or thank her."I said it with trepidation.I did send a few texts to thank her, but she still hasn’t replied to any of my texts.
‘Should I hack into her phone to see what’s going on?’ I was thinking quietly. Not that I was feeling possessive of her, but the sudden shutdown of communication wasn’t in line with her personality. I was afraid that the agency had limited her freedom and taken away her phone, so I needed to do something to confirm my suspicions.
"How much does something like that cost?" Haley asked as she saw Luke fiddling with the guitar. Surprisingly, Luke has a pitch-perfect ability and managed to learn a song in just a few minutes. Although it was just a simple Doraemon song that he learned from me, he did it regardless.
Pepper, who was walking behind the couch, stopped as he heard the question and felt the need to clarify how luxurious Taylor’s gift to me was.
"With the custom-made requirement for Edward, and the inscription, something like that could go for more than 10 grand."
"LUKE. PUT THE GUITAR DOWN NOW!" Haley stood up quickly and ran to where Luke was sitting before snatching the guitar away from him.
…
The party ended, and everyone returned to their own house after saying goodbye to each other.
As we stood in front of the Dunphys' house, Abby grabbed my face and kissed my cheek unexpectedly, "Happy Birthday. My gift to you is the car I’m driving right now. I will transfer the ownership to you before I go back to New York."
I was incredibly baffled when I heard that. After recollecting myself, I smirked and said, "So. You still remember what I said to you when we first met huh?"
Abby blushed and said, "This is just a coincidence. I didn’t buy the same car you said you like because I think it will be meaningful or something."
"It’s very meaningful. I think that this is the best gift I have gotten today." I said and hugged her sincerely, earning a whistle from Jacob. He was then punished instantly by Elsa as he had rooted for the wrong girl.
"Not only that, you also offered to drive me everywhere for the next few weeks, whenever I needed a ride. That’s so thoughtful. You’re the best Abby." I said.
Abby smiled as she heard that. "Okay. Don’t be mellow with me now."
I finally released her, but then Abby saw I had an evil grin on my face, and she quickly caught on to what I had tricked her into.
"Wait. I made no mention of driving you—"
"Too late. No backsies." I said before I waved goodbye at the group and rushed home.
"BASTARD!" Abby yelled from afar. Tara held her shoulder and said, "Just give up Abby. You lost this time."
…
[3rd Person POV]
-Dunphy’s house-
"Why didn’t you give him your gift?" Alex asked Haley before they were going to sleep.
"Shut up." Haley replied with a sad tone.
"You know he won’t ridicule you for giving him something handmade." Alex encouraged her once more. Haley got annoyed by her sister’s constant questioning, turned her head that was resting on the pillow, looked at Alex, and said, "What about you? Did you give him your gift?"
"I did. He said that he would make good use of it," Alex said with a hint of pride in her tone.
Despite the fact that he wouldn't take the SAT for another three years, she had given Edward a SAT level reference book and practise questions. Edward was flabbergasted when he saw the gift, but he accepted it gratefully as he knew Alex had tried her best to think about the gift that would benefit him the most.
"Urgh!" Haley covered her head with the pillow to avoid listening to Alex.
Her little sister shook her head and rested her head on the pillow before she heard Haley say something in a muffled voice, "I can’t give him that, can I? Not after the other girls had given him expensive gifts."
Alex paused for a while before she said, "That’s true. Your gift is kind of worthless if you think about it."
Haley got mad and threw her pillow at Alex. "Shut up and go to sleep-"
"But. It doesn’t mean that he would hate it. You won’t know it until you give it to him. Your designs, I mean. Please don’t sew the clothes yourself. You’ll make a mess in our room." Alex said before ending it with, "Goodnight Haley."
"hmmm… Goodnight," Haley replied while falling into a deep thought.