The Remix and Renewal of ZELDA: Tears of the Kingdom (Patreon)

So if you’re anything like me, you’ve spent the last few weeks playing as much The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom as possible. As of two days ago, I have beaten it at about 99% completion (no, not korok seeds, screw those) and unsurprisingly, I have a lot of thoughts about the experience. But I’m going to split them into two sections. Part one will be a non-spoiler section with general thoughts about the gameplay, the angle, and the effectiveness. And part two will be a spoiler-heavy granular deep dive into every little detail.

As always, we’ll go subject by subject.

PART ONE: NON-SPOILER GENERAL GAME TALK!

The Disappearing Act - We often talk longingly about “disappearing” into a game. In many ways, that’s the core appeal of games, right? Because there is no more distracting an artistic activity that one can pursue. Yeah, yeah, reading is so rewarding, beyond measure, but it takes a certain level of active concentration to make it coherent. And sure, a lot of other visual arts are emotionally-involving and deeply moving, but also require a constant contemplation in their own way. But the thing about interactive video games is they often need your constant, fully-attuned, and physically-coordinated attention. It’s not just about reaction times for fast paced games, it is the simple reality that it keeps your hands busy as they work in coordination with your eyes. They are sensory immersion / distraction machines.

But what’s fun is that when you get to a certain point you can also let your brain totally check out, too. Because sometimes you can find a comforting gaming loops where you can go on autopilot so you are free to think about whatever or even play podcasts alongside (which is much of the same reason they are easy to listen to while driving). But either way you are often just sucked into the constant state of distraction. For this, games are the medium that can help you best forget the world around you. No thoughts. No worries. Only game. No wonder they’re so popular! I kid, of course. Especially because when the game is really compelling / involving, you can find that full point where you can “disappear” into the larger world of the experience itself.

But this cuts two ways. As lovely as the full on disappearing act can feel, it is a rarer and rarer occurrence. But I suppose that’s a part of growing up. Adult responsibilities get in the way and so often I’ll have spent X hours playings something and like “what the fuck did I just do with my time!?!?!” Making things even more difficult is the fact that games are loooooong. Last month I was looking at the end of may schedule I wasn’t sure how i was going to finish this game AND write about Fast X AND write about Blackberry (because I really like Matthew Johnson’s work), but it all got overwhelmed by the pressing need to finish Tears of the Kingdom by a timely juncture. It’s just so, so hard to write about games because of the sheer volume of hours needed to “properly” consume them. Honestly, I don’t like the fact that I’ve crammed 185 hours into the last three weeks while trying to build into some semblance of thought… But when you want to be in dialogue with everyone else around you, sometimes that means just getting to that place anyway.

All that being said, let’s dig in…

For the Love of A Series - So I LOVE the Zelda games. Like, love love love them. Few things give me as much joy as the thoughtful design that goes into them. But what’s also fun is that there are enough entries that I can go back and replay one of them every few years. To wit, in anticipation for TOTK I went back and played Ocarina of Time and Majora’s Mask and wrote about the experience here. In that piece, I locked onto the core idea that what makes the game series so great is that they are so good at giving you “the same but different.” Meaning they are the same in that there are usually the same common tropes and characterizations to glom onto, but then there’s always a new central mechanic, too. Like this time it’s sailing! Or flying through the sky! Or repeated loops where you “Groundhog Day” to save a village! There are these things that make each entry FEEL different in a way that matters. And given that history, I had some serious questions about this new entry: How was Tears Of The Kingdom going to be different? How will it not just be a retread? Especially given that it was the rare example of a direct sequel in the series?

Well, we finally have our answer…

It’s The Remix!!! - Running around and discovering all the little nooks and crannies of the map of Hyrule in Breath of the Wild was one of the best gaming experiences I’ve ever had. And in anticipation for the release of this game I almost went back and replayed it, but I’m so so so so so glad I didn’t. In fact, I hadn’t touched that game since my deep dive around initial release. I’m glad for this because I honestly didn’t realize how much of this sequel would be me running around the same exact Hyrule map with similar kinds of missions. In some small way, I imagine this could partly feel like a tiny let down for many of you? Particularly if you have a good memory and played that last game obsessively? For me, it was more of this constant experience of “oh i remember this” for something that wasn’t totally etched in stone. Still, I had enough distance from BOTW for it to at least feel a bit like a homecoming, which was definitely nice, especially given the time jump. Better yet, I really liked a lot of missions and storytelling (we’ll get to this later), but it’s just that thing about spending a little too much time on the same old map (granted, it’s one of the best open world maps ever). It's definitely a trick that I don’t think they can afford to play again. Meanwhile, there was the core appeal of the new regions, one of which I vaguely knew about going in. That would be the…

Big Sky Country - So the big advertised mechanic was we’d get to be flying around between all these floating islands. And from the majesty of the opening title card, it’s a mostly thrilling experience that delivers. Heck, it feels like the grand potential first hinted at in Skyward Sword, now fully-realized. Especially when you get the wingsuit and it’s easy to build a lot of the zonai planes and space-craft to fly around. But there’s also one tiny element of it that feels a bit like a let down? Like after the first big training sky island I was excited for what other wondrous environments would be waiting in the sky… and there and no other big islands???? At least not ones that were super different? Again, I only feel A LITTLE let down by this. So many of the small islands had fun puzzles and challenges (I especially the diving timed challenges). And some of the dungeon approaches are A BLAST. But it feels weird to have the opening intro island be the best of the new map / big sky experience. Meanwhile, If you want to talk about cool surprises, I didn’t realize the biggest new element of the game would not come from above, but below…

Caves, Caves, Caves - So there’s a giant cave map the size of Hyrule UNDER Hyrule and those mad lads, I can’t believe they’ve done this! Especially because it’s TERRIFYING at first. It’s dark and confusing and you constantly have to light your path, then it only gets worse when the gloom attack stuff starts happening and you’re losing precious hearts. But like most scary things, you start building defenses and getting some gloom recovery food and suddenly you can go splunking around in the dark with more reckless abandon. But it REALLY is a juxtaposition of feelings with the other two light-heavy maps (and not great for claustrophobia). Though wandering around down there is also a little bit awkward? There’s all these walls and you’re never sure how high they go up and you’re seeing an X on the map and it’s like HOW THE FUCK DO I GET OVER THERE. All in all, I’d say it’s a little *too* big and samey? But I still love all the hidden coliseums and mines and special armor treats. But overall, it's one of those things where a Zelda game just goes so above and beyond your expectations that you can’t help but be impressed.

Speaking of which…

POWERS / ABILITIES

So much of the delight of BOTW were the rune abilities that endlessly powered innovation. The use of magnets, bombs, ice pillars and stasis in particular (where you stop time and build up kinetic energy) resulted in me STILL seeing fun and inventive videos even years after the games release. But if you swap out those familiar powers for something new? Then unsurprisingly, you could so radically change the way that players approach that game. So of course, Tears of the Kingdom did just that! And let us just say now…

They knocked it out of the fucking park.

Ultrahand / Construct - It was said that TOTK would be a game about building and hoo boy did they deliver. Like, this is incredible, is it not? It all felt so guided and intuitive. First it’s plank bridges, then you then start building these gliders and hot air balloons and by the time you get the steering sticks you can do so, so much more. I don’t think I ever got TOO creative in builds (I’m one of those weirdos who always worries they’re going to run out of X resources). But all it takes is a little gander at Tik Tok to see people building giant dath robots, X Wings. Saw-like instruments of death, and even horrible “tributes” to 9/11. Which is to say, I have a feeling that even years from now, we’ll be seeing even more inventive creations being made.

*The ONE caveat I have to all this is that whoever decided the way to make two pieces unstick from each other was to “shake it back and forth really chaotic-like” is bananas. Like, I can’t get over this decision. Do they thrive off of chaos and knowing how many things it will mess up!?!??!?! They HAVE to, right? It’s especially egregious when it comes to building your house and wanting things to be in straight lines with carefully planted gardens and pools. I genuinely can’t believe they did it. But somehow, the discrepancy between the joy of creating a tool so amazing of this power and the annoying nature of its elements seems like peak “Nintendo Being Nintendo.”

Ascend - I don’t know if this story is apocryphal, but apparently the Ascend ability came from a quick hack they were using when designing the game. Apparently, they realized it was annoying to go all away into these caves they were building and they wanted a quick way to exit these spaces, so they created the Ascend as a simple tool for themselves. And then it was apparently like “you know what? This is fun!!!” And thus a new core mechanic was made. They didn’t care what it “broke” in the old map because, hey, breaking part of the fun. But honestly it didn’t really break much? It just made traveling so much more fun and surprising. Plus, they could engineer so many fun and interesting puzzles around the mechanic and I’m so thankful they did. I mean, what ability could be better in a game about sky, earth, and caves?

Rewind - This is one of those galaxy brain powers and even after 185 hours I feel like I *just* started scratching the surface with it???? Like you just keep realizing how many times you find the inventive way to move yourself from A to B. It’s also INVALUABLE in fighting big enemies who hurl stuff at you. Even now, I STILL feel like so many more times could have used it???

Fusing - It’s pretty uniformly agreed upon that one of the most annoying things about BOTW was that you had weapons that would constantly break and a fairly limited inventory space to back them up with. As such, it is probably the biggest thing people wanted to see change this game and, in a way, they kind of doubled down on the alternative. But I think this is one of those ultimately productive things. Yes, it is super annoying. But the thing is that as players we love to get comfortable with a thing we like and use that as a crutch. It’s human nature. And this FORCES you to keep using different weapons / strategies. Moreover, it really does force you to use your resources to build new fun weapons and pick and choose your various powers as you deal with the elemental nature of your enemies. Again, sometimes it really is about forcing you to engage the game’s endless sense of possibility. Because even putting a piece of meat on the end of an arrow ends up being a great diversionary tactic for distracting monsters! So yeah, it is annoying, but sometimes the annoying obstacle is precisely what breeds our own larger enjoyment. Ultimately, I love the way fusing was the solution to an old “problem.” Moreover, it gave us rocket shields!

Fighting With Friends - The sage mechanic is just so smart, especially in the way it runs contrary to much of the isolation that comes in running through the map alone (along with the ability to turn it off when you want to enjoy that solace). But the moment I realized the sages was going to be ADDITIVE and you didn’t just have to have one at a time, like I assumed it would be? Gah, that’s just such a wonderful realization. To suddenly have a game where you are running around with a crew of people is so much fun. We’ll get into the specifics of each later, but every decision behind this was impeccable. I love it.

Zonai Devices / Battery Life - Just another one of those massive 10/10 no notes decisions. It feels like it opens up endless inventions and the battery life thing is SUCH a smart way of introducing various limits. I just can’t believe how well it all works when it could have been so unwieldy and game breaking. Instead, it feels game MAKING. And speaks to the larger…

PHILOSOPHY OF APPROACH

Revolution Vs Evolution: The “Newer is Always Better!” Problem - Video games are funny things to try and “criticize” in an objective sense. Mostly because it’s a young medium and I feel like with every passing year we get so much better at solving existing problems / control schemes / integrating various mechanics into both gameplay and story immersion. It’s like this constant evolution as they just get more enjoyable. So in that spirit, why WOULDN’T Tears of the Kingdom be a really smart revision of so many things we loved about the last game? Why WOULDN’T the powers be an even better fit? Why WOULDN’T it be a streamlined experience in every way? It doesn’t feel wrong to say so. But it sort of brings up this ethical question of how we talk about “measuring” the experience of games.

Because Breath of the Wild felt like a massive, revolutionary leap for the Zelda series (and when it comes to open world design, games at large). It’s a testament to creativity and invention. It pushed so much forward. And was Tears of the Kingdom the same kind of revolutionary leap? Or just a beautiful little evolution? I don’t think there’s a solid answer to this. I just think it’s one of these fascinating things about games because there are so many revolutionary games of yore that just… don’t really feel as fun to play these days? And yet, everything now is so built upon the lessons of the past and it’s just one of those things where I think it’s important to remember the revolution. Because that’s what PRECISELY speaks to the player in the moment when they discover it in the first place. It’s that “I’ve never played anything like this” sensation, whether mechanics or story-wise, that really works in the time and place of the NOW. And it’s always one of the most important things to strive for.

Tear Memory Pieces - Don’t worry I won’t say a single thing about the story! And I like the big designs in the ground that you see from the air and falling to find the tears! I just want to say that I HATE that the memories go out of order based on how you discover them. I mean, it’s so NOT a puzzle. In fact, there were so many times where I’m like “oh this is a really great emotional build up scene for that thing that happens later, so wish I had that context!” I get that the “go your own direction” mantra is a huge part of the Zelda series, but I am genuinely bewildered as to why they would make this choice when it comes to the story memories themselves. It is such a stunning misunderstanding of THE POINT of why stories are shaped in specific ways, especially when jumbled… Anyway, what do I know.

The Purposeful Clunk - So this is perhaps one of the more interesting little discussions, but it has to do with Nintendo’s ongoing fascination with making interactions / menus the opposite of a speedy experience. And look, it IS annoying and clunky and this is usually the kind of thing I will spend 28k words talking about in a giant mini-book. But I think there’s a small, but crucial difference that makes it not as awful. Unlike Red Dead II, what so many of these Nintendo games are not striving for “realism,” but instead for ceremony. That may sound like a small difference, but it’s a critical one. Because it’s how you get the characters little catch phrases, or these little presentations of your item, and sometimes it feels like a slot machine paying out a little noise (or more accurate to this game, the Gashapon, which I always use to hear as “gotcha ponds,” which makes sense dammit). It’s slow and unwieldy, but it’s trying to scratch a little fun itch in your brain at the same time. But yes, even I agree that having to start an entire conversation over and over again with a lady in a cave so that she’ll fix ONE item of my dubious food at a time is a terrible decision. And that there is a much happier balance of ceremony, nice pacing, and less annoyance that games like Fortnite have kind of perfected. But I do understand what Nintendo is trying to do in the first place.

Bugs / Glitches - No, I didn’t do the item duplication! That’s totally okay cheating I guess, but I wanted to cover this game right!

Controls / Gameplay - Literally my only complaint is that trying to switch between rune powers is a little slow and finicky sometimes? Also the Z targeting with shield is a little odd too, where I’m often like NO NOT THAT FOOL, THE OTHER FOOL as Horriblins smack me from the ceiling. But overall I can’t remember a “day of release game” in recent years that feels this fully put together, which brings us to my favorite meta point I can make about the game itself…

The Extra Year To Finish - So apparently Tears of the Kingdom was done a year ago and they spend the extra year fine-tuning and polishing it within an inch of its life. This is extraordinary. And an increasing rarity in the industry, but I think that’s part of the whole fucking problem. Miyamoto got famous for a quote he (maybe) said that, “a delayed game is eventually good, but a rushed game will be bad forever.” And for years, this was a central tenet for Nintendo’s approach to making incredible games. But in the age of digital downloads and releasing updates, so much of that has gone by the wayside. To the point that it’s kind of broken the industry. I mean, the Cyberpunk 2077 debacle should speak volumes about this. And yet, I’ll see people be like, “hey, that game is good now! As is No Man’s Sky!” And I’m like, isn’t this sentiment part of the problem, too? For starters, the Cyberpunk release nearly destroyed that esteemed company. And moreover, shrugging it along means we’re just letting broken products wander into the world and being fine with that happening if it’s “getting fixed.” I know these companies are under endless pressure, but the endless pressure will ALWAYS be there. That’s the whole damn point. They lose billions going “that’s just how it is now,” when they’re the ones making it so. The approach of Tears of the Kingdom shouldn’t be a luxury, it’s the standard that ensures success in and of itself.

PART TWO - GRANULAR SPOILER-ISH SECTIONS!!!

I realize I kind of don’t know what constitutes a “spoiler” for some people, but I’m just going to talk in depth about all the temples / items before I get to the parts that will clearly be marked as being more story centric. Cool? Cool.

TEMPLES / BOSSES

Wind Temple - This is the first story / temple that the game REALLY wants you to do and that’s probably because it knows that wind gust power will help you SO MUCH in moving around for the rest of the game. It is also perhaps the most enthralling of all the main quests. I mean, the bouncy pirate ships as you approach the temple is INCREDIBLE. It also has the best dungeon puzzles, hands down. It even teaches you how to think about the dungeon maps you’re seeing to find the right entrances and exits. And the end boss Colgera is just enthralling, too. Again, it’s that Skyward Sword promise of wonderful vertical combat. And the joy of constantly being in air with this perfect combination of “safe,” but desperate to get timing of moments with the three rapid hits? It wasn’t too challenging, but it was fun as hell. So put it all together and I honestly think it might be one of the best Zelda dungeons ever? For it’s right up there with the time bubble pirate ship in Skyword Sword, the inverted temple in Majoras Mask, the forest temple in Ocarina, the tower of gods in Wind Waker, and tower of hera in LTTP etc. But hey, those are my favorites!

Water Temple - Once again it’s another dungeon where the approach to it might be the best part? What with the moon-like gravity and the air bubbles to ride, it just feels so damn inventive, particularly as you are cascading for waterfalls you can swim up. But unlike the other dungeons, the puzzles in this one felt pretty straight forward? I dunno, maybe I had just done so many shrines by that point (and this was closest to those kinds of puzzles), but it felt pretty easy to grasp each one. Meanwhile, Mucktorok took the crown as the most annoying boss for me. Though that was mostly because trying to hit him with an arrow as he scuddled around in that second phase was really annoying, but using the water ability with my spear helped the fight in general, I’d say. Overall it’s great.

Lightning Temple - Probably the most traditional dungeon of the bunch? One in league with the old shadow / desert temples and the like? I loved coming back and using the mirrors (and homemade mirror shields) to align the puzzles and get around. But honestly the lightning power you get with Riju makes the challenge SO much fun (and also Yunabo’s powers worked in debuffing them, too so you could alternate back and forth). The queen Gibdo boss fight was pretty solid too, but once you realized you could hide in the light columns and not get hit it made a world of difference. Just absolutely solidness all around. Also, navigating the way to the temple was COOL looking, but less fun, as the dust storm really did mess with my orientation a bit?

Fire Temple - In one way it’s absolutely the coolest and most challenging of the dungeons, what with the Temple of Doom style minecarts and tracks and switches and hidden bits and bobs. And holy heck does it LOOK cool. But it was also the hardest and most annoying, at least for me. But that’s mostly because I would get stuck on one level or fall or fuck on some key part or go MAD before realizing “oh I can climb this wall” etc (even though it’s clearly marked grating). Still, it’s great. And challenging in a way that an old school dungeon SHOULD be. The boss Marbled Gohma was really cool, too, but I kept getting stuck on the second phase where I was surrounded by the bounders and not being able to get a bowling ball shot off on the boss with Yunabo, so I looked up some strats and realizing you could rewind one of the boulders? So you totally had lots of time to get off a shot with Yunobo? It made all the difference. Honestly, I could see this being someone’s FAVORITE Dungeon, too, but for me it was the most tricky.

Spirit Temple - Ah the secret fifth dungeon, which was so cool in its design. From the way you find the mask by going through the lightning isles (which was cool as hell), to the way you start building Mineru’s Zonite body in the depths. To the weird trial and error of the approach in the dpths (it was long before I realized I didn’t HAVE to be inside the suit). But outfitting the zonai body with different weapons was just such a neat little choice. Sure, there were these little annoying things along the way so it didn't feel totally graceful, but overall I think it represents just how DIFFERENT they were trying to be with every challenge. And the Seized Construct was a gimmick boss but it was SO MUCH FUN turning it into a big robot boxing match (and figuring out how important rewind was with the projectiles). Just a lovely surprise all in all.

Ganon’s Dungeon - Okay it’s technically not a temple, but that final descent into the depths to fight Ganon was a really nice alternative to expectation and hoo boy, there wer so many damn Lynels around. I also just would have loved a good cooking spot at one point because I drastically underestimated how much sundelion-soaked food I would need to get my hearts back along the way. Not once, but like, three times (this is before I remembered I had fucking travel medallions). But still a really good approach. As for the quality of the end fight with Ganon? We’ll talk about my favorite parts in the story section, but overall it was a fight I really liked until I realized you could really cheese those first two phases. Like, if you just have your best armor with everything at 20 (60 overall) his blows only take you one heart, even with Gloom. And with a good weapon you can just totally outlast him quickly as you take hits and just don’t stop pummeling him. No strategy or timing needed! Which is I wish I had to use a little more strategy and challenge there, but the ending elements were so good anyway and I’ll talk about them later.

But overall, I’d say the batting average of all the temples was so damn high. What an achievement. Now onto the…

SAGE CHARACTERS

Tulin! My Sweet Boy! - The little bird boy is just trying to prove himself to his fambly! He’s so little! But he helps me move around him better! I love my lil kid brudder! Also, if I had a dollar for every time he came up behind me as I was picking something up and thus I hit “A” and he gusted all my shit all over the place I’d have… more dollars. But I still love him, he’s doing his best.

Yunobo! My Dum Dum Boy! - It was such a neat little bait and switch where I thought he was gonna be the end bad boss throughout this, but it turns out this gullible little dum dum is going to be your bro. I kinda wish he had old Ocarina of Time Goron-like sounds though to better reflect it. But his rock breaking ability in caving made him INVALUABLE… also I don’t know about you, but by the end I kinda wanted to eat marbled rock roast.

Riju! Step On Me, Chief! - Hahahaha, you ever feel like a characterization was done for competitive shipping purposes? Because damn they glammed up Riju in the six years since the events of Breath of The Wild and it feels like people are going nuts for the spunky hourglass chief who would step on you for looking at her funny (I’m seeing big time Megera from Hades vibes getting invoked online). But practically speaking, she also has the most useful and devastating offensive power in the game. The lightning ability was SO GOOD for enemy clearing / zapping / disarming bad guys and in combat it was the one I routinely came to use again and again.

Sidon! Boy Got Torso for DAYS! - Me singing: “It’s Torsey, The Torso Shark, touch him and wishes come truuuuue.” I know Prince Sidon has his massive fans, especially after the last game, and I like him! But he’s not “my guy.” I dunno, he looks too smooth. Plus, one of them HAD to give you a defensive power and as useful as it was in bosses with big hitting power, I just never really thought defensively in my gameplay style and favored movement instead?

Mineru - Also, not really my character (we honestly don’t get too much from her aside from a GREAT scene with Zelda), but her big robot fun form completely ruled. It was so much fun to just, like, suddenly hop into a mech and use some of the special zonai devices to make hay (especially when you have a lot of battery power in late game). The fact that all five characters / powers worked as well as they did in concert is a real testament to the game’s development.

Character “Arcs” and Cut Scenes - So if I have one little nitpick thought about the story, it’s that every single damn temple ended with basically the SAME cutscene where the character learns their history of being a sage and the old war with Ganon, etc. It’s just one of those problems of the “you can go in any order” philosophy in terms of how it affects the story. Because you can’t stagger and build. Instead, you end up repeating the same exact thing again and again and I would have LOVED to have something more character driven in those cinematics. And it’s like, figure out the way to build cutscenes that trigger in order no matter WHICH temples you do first?

SHRINES / MAP STUFF

Towers - Holy crap. So at first I was like, oh no are we going to have to do tower climbs again? I really liked them in the first game, but it just had a whole “been there, done that” vibe and turns out they were RELYING on that expectation. Because the first time you’re flung into the air? Holy crap, what a stunning choice. And it is such a great mechanic to keep coming back to when it comes to navigating your way around the sky world. Yup, it’s absolutely one of the best things about the came and the first thing I did post Wind Temple was go around and unlock them all. What a joy.

Shrines - I beat all 152 shrines and it’s just A+++ work. The Shrines in Breath Of The Wild were one of my favorite things, too, but it also felt every once and awhile there was a puzzle that felt odd or out of step. Whereas here I feel like the powers made it so much more focused and every single shrine had its fun central challenge, but more importantly, they are SO GOOD at teaching you how to use the powers in turn. Even the “start with no weapons” ones were so good at teaching you basic fighting and fusing strategy. Plus, there were so many other ones where FINDING the shrine in the first place was the challenge (and we were rightfully rewarded with Ruaru’s blessing). I’m in awe.

Lightroot Splunking - Early on it felt SO HARD to navigate the depths and by the end I found all 120 lightroots (which really does help with the overall lighting of the depths). But here's the thing… I can’t believe how fucking long it took me to realize the light roots were RIGHT below the shrines and vice versa (and each one was named the reverse). Like, I seriously was almost done hunting them all down I am just… This would have saved me SO MUCH TIME SEARCHING. Overall, it’s the one aspect of the game that felt a little same-y / too much, but not sure if others agree? There really was a lot of cool shit down there, though. But I can’t tell you how many times I was like, do these walls go all the way up? Am I wasting my time climbing? Where so much of the map discovery in BOTW felt specific and well-drawn, there’s just something a little too uniform about this one.

Bubbul Gems / Caves / Masks - The caves were such a fun little treat and I honestly preferred the little design tricks of them to the giant chasms of the depth. You always had to hunt down the hiding bubbul rabbit frog thing and that genuinely made each time a fun little game. I didn’t 100 percent all the caves though. I think I have over twenty left or something? But the way this also rewarded you with the fun monster masks is just SUCH a great motivator for doing so. Not just because you can walk through Bobokins and have fun interactions, but you can even walk up to Lynel’s by the end. I think this was a remarkable way of doing the underground stuff in the game. I love the whole system. But less successful were the…

Wells - I can’t believe I found every well. I thought my final reward would be much better, but here’s my little medal I guess.. sigh.

Korok Seeds / Torture - What I like about the Korok seeds is that I NEVER have the urge to find them all and always get enough to beef up my inventory plenty just by casually moving about. As for the much meme’d “help me find my friend” Koroks it was one of those things that was fun at first, but quickly you realize you don’t need to do it. Besides, the gifts it has given us in the endless videos of Korok torture has made the entire experience and inclusion the greatest choice in the history of gaming… I’m exaggerating… kind of.

FAVORITE SIDE QUESTS

I won’t go through them all obviously, but instead single out my favorite ones.

Mattison's Quest - To me, this is what Zelda games are about. You are in Tarrey Town and you encounter this little character quest and you think it’s going to be this little silly thing. You help a kid with their homework! Then you help them play on a fun little cart! And what you don’t realize you’ve doing some character and relationship building and all of sudden it’s cresting into this genuinely heartwarming moment about growing up and them saying a tender goodbye to their oddball parenting couple from the game before. It was such a beautiful moment. And it’s everything I talk about in terms of “marrying the joke” and finding unexpected resonance in the deeper emotional reality of things. And the fact I could catch up with Mattison later in Gerudo Town is one of the things that make the whole world feel lived in and special. I adored it.

I’m A Newspaper Man! - Okay, it’s technically not one quest, but twelve stable quests, but just the IDEA of it was so endearing. As Link, I get to be a newspaper man! Giving the readers the scoop on the ins and outs of Hyrule as we track down Zelda! And I work with the endearing birdman Penn (who the discord lovingly called Launchpad McQuack) and I just love the spirit of it. I especially love the playfulness of each quest as they all ended with some goofy twist or betrayal (usually from the pesky Yiga clan and the like). It was all fantastic.

The Hateno Mayoral Race - Another one of those things that shows what Nintendo does so well. Where every game loves to double down on you picking a “side” in these kinds of quests and needing to do another playthrough to see the other side, they instead turned into into a lovely little story about how the two quarreling candidates aren’t that different and actually APPRECIATE each other and can heal their generational divide! It was heartwarming! More long as epic games should do this! You’re not “playing both sides,” you’re bringing them together.

Underwear Warriors - I feel like the big reveal came from a better pun in Japanese? But the disgusting brothers make you fighting nakey is such a funny and surreal choice. I love when these games just go for it like that and get weird.

The Stable Trotters - The Zelda series has had a weird amount of “get the band together” quests, but as awkward as some of the carriage navigations were, I love the spirit of this. Particularly as it gets you one of the most useful unlocks in the game, which is the ability to upgrade your armor… the less said about what those fairies do with Link when they pull him down into the fountain the better, right? I mean… they’re clearly… It feels wrong.

The Yiga Clan Redux - Ah, the comic relief fighting missions. What I particularly like about this was the way all the missions taught you fun ideas for building death vehicles. Which means it’s one of those sneaky smart things. I also like all the fun gimmick battles. Overall, a great change of pace in all regards.

BUSY / FETCH / COMPLETIONIST QUESTS

Dumb Sign Guy - I can’t believe how much time I wasted on this dude early on, but I thought it would be building to something fun? I don’t know, I guess it’s there to help teach you the simple physics of building simple machines, but pretty soon I was like I DON’T NEED YOUR 20 RUPEES YOU IDIOT, LEARN HOW TO DO IT YOURSELF. But maybe having characters like that is part of the experience?

Wanted Monsters -  Loved this monster hunting and honestly wish there was more of this and better rewards. Instead it felt like the level spiked super quick and then just went to “kill all of them.” But overall I’m glad it’s here. I also love the arc as a player of going from “gleeoks = instadeath” to being like PSSH, YOU AIN’T SHIT in the course of a few days. Love that scaling!

Misko’s Treasures - ALWAYS love these sorts of treasure hunts. Though I could never figure out how to get the dog on my side in order to get the pants treat? I’m not the only one who seems to have this bugged?

Shield Surf Teacher - I wish I found her way earlier when getting some of those shields woulda been cool. By that point I was way over the level of those offerings.

Pirate Clearing - Love these sorts of “reclaim your town” kinda missions and it also felt the most dramatically appropriate choice after the last game.

Champions Weapons - These were SO not rewarding enough for the effort that goes in. The weapons are basically useless by the time you can obtain them. They should have cool powers or effects or something and not break at that. It just feels like such a wasted opportunity to have done something fun? Especially for a game that rarely lets opportunities for fun go by.

Compendium - I will never do the compendium.

Plus there’s a million other things, but that feels like the main bunch?

ARMOR TIER RANKINGS

Let’s just get this out of the way. I kind of hate how many armors were repeated from the last game. Especially given that we had to track them down / pay for them AGAIN?? And, like, shouldn’t this be the exact kind of thing you can update for a fun little twist? Granted, pretty much everything that was new was cool, but time to rank.

S TIER - Wingsuit (10 stars no notes, it’s so much fun), Miner’s Suit (you glow and look like a midsommar nightmare demon with bell bottoms), Barbarian Armor (again, very temple of doom), Fierce Diety Armor (basically anything that gave attack bonuses was so useful), and Climbing Gear (just so useful for getting around).

A TIER - Zonaite Armor (so hugely useful at the end of the game for piloting your machines and getting bang for your buck. Plus it looks really cool and Aztec influenced). Plus, all the animal masks that let you infiltrate that group of monsters.

B TIER - Depths Armor (gloom resistance is just too useful, but it makes you look way too close to a death eater / klan member and I don’t like that one bit). Plus all the Awakening / Twilight / Ocarina armors from years past are just a neat little nod. I particularly liked how hard it was to get Majora’s Mask (wish it came with a neat power though)

C TIER - I shamefully never really figured out if the “hot weather / cold” weather attack armors were, like, the upgrades of the old armors, but I wish that all was more directed to you earlier. Also upgrading them is so much harder resource-wise, but I guess I get it? Like, these rewards really should come earlier and it all feels a part of something mismanaged a bit (one of the rare parts of this game).

D TIER - All the old armors for the previous game. Also, I could never tell if the stealth armors were actually helping? Like there isn’t some mega stealth mechanic in this game so I guess it felt odd.

F TIER - The Froggy Suit. Wait, isn’t it great for preventing you from slipping? That’s F Tier? Yup, but that’s because having all three pieces doesn’t FULLY protect you from sliding down, which is insane to me, especially after needing to do all 12 Penn Quests to get it. I literally don’t understand this choice at all. Why keep the most annoying element!?! What does this accomplish?!?! How can you not ACTUALLY REWARD YOUR PLAYER after all that!??! I don’t want to slide down at all anymore, but the game is like “you’re still gonna slide a bunch cause fuck you.” Thus, F Tier.

HORSIES

Big horse! Dead Horse! Goldy Horse! So many horsies! End of thought!

NEAT DISCOVERIES

Did you know you could get Hylian rice by cutting grass in paddies? I dunno, I just thought that was neat… I’m sure there’s way more things like this, but that’s the one that stuck out to me. Anway..

FINALLY, THE STORY…

The truth about Zelda storylines is that It’s less some big epic, meaningful story and more about simple rooting mechanics. I mean, most of them have a little bit of stock back and forth and a kidnapping of some sort - because the odd thing about Link and Zelda is that they’re not quite a team, more always on two different missions that often work in harmony, all before building to to a big action crescendo where you “save” or “get” the princess. And hey, it’s become part of a bad trope for a reason. Meanwhile, the best bits of storytelling tend to happen in the rescued villages and temple trials along the way. But sometimes there are these touching little moments or imagines that hit us in a meaningful way nonetheless. I’d argue the most successful one is the final, mournful still at the end of Ocarina of Time, just because it reminds you that they are two kids who got involved in this crazy adventure, but they’re still that… just kids.

This is maybe the best pure Link / Zelda story yet?

There’s just something so much more effecting about this one, the implied idea that they’ve spent the last 6 years being close (hint hint, nudge nudge). The way she gets so displaced by time and has to make this incredible sacrifice to ensure the hope for the future. It’s honestly a little bit “Doctor Who-y” this time, which I say as a tremendous compliment. Because boy howdy, that ending. It’s not that the final dragon on dragon battle is difficult, it’s just so well set-up on the writing level. Like I smacked my head, OF COURSE Ganon would go full dragon in defeat, too. And yes, it’s all another act of saving, but the way it all cascades into the battle and her returning to Zelda and the falling and the BEAUTY of diving for her and catching her??? It’s just an electric way to finish that game, a rare symbiosis of story, gameplay, and actual investment. But the best part is the scene that comes right after, the way her voice cracks as she’s just feeling so much delight, relief, and discombobulation  - along with her joy in knowing you did it - just like she did it in turn. That last smile combined with the “Find Princess Zelda: Completed” title card?

I genuinely cried. I honestly can’t believe I cried, but I did. It all could have come off so, so wrong, but it's an incredible example of what you can do when you find the way to make every piece of your game come together into something that gels into a complete cinematic experience. And I know it’s just a small difference, but that word choice of “find” really does make such a difference. After 1000 years, they found each other again.

I loved it.

THE LAST THOUGHTS

The Inversion Point - In the opening I talked about the allure of “disappearing into a game” and being so enraptured with a world that everything else disappears. The truth is that games also kind of have an inversion point of this. Because there is a point where the game stops feeling like the game, where things stop feeling like discovery, where the uncanny becomes canny, where all the locations become familiar, and you kind of start going through motions in your effort to see the thing completed (to whatever degree you are trying). I mean, one of the last nights I played I was just trying to discover the last 50 or so light roots and I don’t even remember anything about the experience other than I was listening to Conan’s podcast. It was just… going through the motions… and I tend not to like that part of video games.

But it feels like a common problem. For instance, I notice it’s when many people fall off them and have to come later. It’s part of the problem of every big AAA game having 100-200 hours of gameplay. I mean, I know I don’t have to find every light root. I really do. But there’s some weird mix of compulsions in this medium that is hard to get a handle on. Besides, sometimes there’s a lot of competing feelings behind our instinct to disappear in the first place…

Gaming As Relief - I don’t know about you, but I feel like I know a lot of people who are having a rough time lately. I mean, I know I have, and a lot of friends have, too. Maybe it’s just what’s happening here with the strike. Maybe there’s just something in the air as they say (oh crud, I realize I just said this as the air quality crisis is hitting the east coast because of the fires, sending love to any of you over there). I just feel like I know a lot of people who have been going through things as they play this game. In that spirit, they found some kind of solace in playing it. Maybe it was a distraction. Maybe it was a wonderful escape. Maybe it was something altogether more moving.  Though I wager that for many, it was bits of all these feelings. But in the end, I really did connect to it. And ultimately there’s one word I’d associate Tears of the Kingdom with more than any other…

Renewal - Early on I was going to focus so hard on the remix elements of the game, as if that would be the be all and end all of it. But it’s funny how so many of those thoughts about the remix just quietly drifted away. Maybe I was taken with the elements of evolution. Maybe I just got to focus so much more on the elements of the new. Maybe I just wasn’t bothered anymore. Either way, the Zelda series’ uncanny ability to give us “the same, but different” once again came to fruition, but ultimately in a way I didn’t not expect. Because it was the spirit of renewal. Whether in the story text of Zelda’s awakening actions from her long dragon-y slumber, or my own feelings of needing relief and renewal in turn, the other word I realize I feel most in concert with these feelings… is gratefulness.

For this I feel most of all.

<3HULK