THE MANDALORIAN - CHAPTER 12 - THE SEIGE (Patreon)

Ya’ll, I’m so tired of this crud. I’ve long been worried about how they’ll handle the Baby Yoda stuff, but finally, THE MANDALORIAN is doing the one thematic thing that just actively makes me upset. Yes, it turns out the whole reason the Empire wanted Baby Yoda was obviously for his magic force blood or whatever to use in their genetic experiments and… folks, I’m so so so so so so sick of magic blood for one simple reason and please allow me to unpack it ever so delicately…

*clears throat*

IT’S FUCKING EUGENICS.

That’s what it is. It’s just fucking eugenics AKA “the study of how to arrange reproduction within a human population to increase the occurrence of heritable characteristics regarded as desirable. Developed largely by Sir Francis Galton as a method of improving the human race, eugenics was increasingly discredited as unscientific and racially biased during the 20th century, especially after the adoption of its doctrines by the Nazis in order to justify their treatment of Jews, disabled people, and other minority groups.” TLDR version: it’s an evil way of seeing the world to justify the valuing of one group / person over another.

Now, you may be suspicious of my criticism, particularly if you believe “it’s the bad guys that are doing it, so it’s fine!” Because they’re the ones trying to make those life forms we saw in the pods or whatever. But that’s the whole thing. Even the idea that it works and Baby Yoda’s blood is worth protecting from bad guys turns it into some super gross shit. Unless this entire thing is massive a bait and switch and the experiment turns out to be nonsense that never could have worked all along? But given the fact that we’ve seen Baby Yoda be all force-user-y already, I don’t think we’re going to get such turn of convention.

And, look I know there’s no malice behind these choices, It’s just one of those hero conventions / plots that people keep invoking without ever stopping to think about how gross it really is. But deep down, even it’s innocent use taps into the gross and false “logic” of eugenics, like some people are just born with things that make them special! Which is also totally part of the insidiously problematic nature of it all. It’s exactly the kind of shit that gives rise to Randian thinking. So the only real question is for us, the audience now….

What the hell do we do with this?

Honestly, I can’t decide if this is 1) actually impeding my enjoyment of the ABJECT CUTENESS of Baby Yoda, etc or 2) making the eugenic undercurrent MORE insidious or 3) not mattering because I’m just getting better at the stark cognitive dissonance involved in watching him on the whole. Because, yes, that little fucker is cute. Particularly in the episode’s opening, wherein the wee idiot fries himself with wires in a way that plays for high comedy. It’s a moment that also invites the question of why Mando really thought it was a good idea to let him try that? Like, has there been one example where his trust in Baby Yoda to do a simple task was well placed? But such questions misse the point - it’s all part and parcel of the how much his character mostly exists to be put into amusing scenarios, purely for our enjoyment.

I mean, why put Baby Yoda in a school classroom for a hot minute? Because he looks cute as shit in the chair and he can force steal blue macaroons from his classmate. I’m not a monster. I cannot deny that this shit is delightful. But that’s pretty much all it is. The school has no other utility to this plot, nor any other reason to be. The scene only exists to delight. The same is true for the way Baby Yoda throws up his hands in celebration. Just as it is true for the way he throws up on his little robe. Just as it’s adorable to watch Mando clean his spit up right after. Honestly, if there is no skill that we can doubt from the makers of this show, they are masters at engineering “”the cuteness of the moment.”

The only question is to what end?

Even as the narrative teases us with the magic blood and secret plots and hallway fisticuffs and speeder bikes and those Darth-Vader-Ass looking soldiers at the end, it all still can’t help feel like secondary noise to “Operation: Cute!” Which causes me to have another question… what if we got an episode that was 100% just Mando and Baby Yoda bonding and featured the little guy learning and that was it? A gentle episode where we let all that other noise slip away for a damn minute? Because I have this weird believe that it would not only be endearing, it would nourish the core story of the show in a way that no vague plot allusions, nor imminent danger, nor little singular cute throwaway moment really could.

So, really… what’s stopping them?

RANDOM THOUGHTS!

-I feel like they’re playing pretty fast and loose with Carl Weathers and Cara’s characterization, now turning them into fun family figures with warmth and do-goodnik instincts. Truth be told, I think building out a cast like this permanently can only behoove the show — especially if they’re not REALLY going to develop Mando and Baby Yoda relationship any time soon, but hey what do I know.

-It’s the Chin-ball guys from the cantina! Apparently they’re called The Aqualish??? Wait, has anyone else noticed this show’s habit of grouping planetary races like this together whereas Lucas didn’t do that so much in the movies? Just me? Anyway.

-Gahhhhhhh the hateful IRL shit of Gina Carano. Didney gotta do something about that.

-Anyone else find the joke about Horatio Sanz’s fish dude and his debt slavery… not funny? I mean this is a barbaric IRL practice and it’s often preferable to go to jail for a few fucking years then be an indentured slave with no wages. Even the “still can’t see out of my left eye” sort of puts a weird stamp on it. Like, was this dude really that bad, even? FELT WEIRD.

-That discussion sort of invites another question, too: what makes for a good target? When is the show’s penchant casual murder okay? I’ll keep note of it going forward, but I think throwing stormtrooper off the side of that hangar and onto the ground qualifies as okay.

-This is a dumb aesthetic thing, but I wish Mando had a cooler pistol.

-More repeating hallway sets!

-That moment where they instruct Horatio’s character to disable the reactor above the lava is a perfect example of how the show only knows how to joke / create technical danger, but often has ZERO idea how to turn the screws and make genuine drama.

-“Destroy them!” I really wish shows like this would just say “kill.”

-Carl Weathers directs! I like how he wasn’t gonna let those VFX sequences go by without some top tier work that looks really cool. Overall I feel like he had good control of the tone? Agree? No? Either way discussion of direction leads to more…

-Cinematography Talk! Because once again I want you to pay attention to how the show is shot because it keeps doing something interesting with the camera in how it mostly stays on the same perpendicular horizontal level (about chest high) with lots of medium and 3/4 shots of multiple subject in frame. I swear this is a result of working with that ding dang VFX backdrop stage, because this is really not a common stylistic thing, nor an effective one (they’re also not using a ton of set-ups?) Most of the time the camera is a little higher and looking a little bit up or down / closer to subjects — But as I result I keep feeling like we’re missing out on an interplay of close-ups and more textured shots with depth and use of the z-axis.

-This weeks meta fan brouhaha: So apparently after Sackoff showed up last week and there were all these Rebels nods, the fans thought Ahsoka (a character I am only vaguely aware of) was going to show up and it was going to become this big tie in? And because it didn’t they’re now angry to the point her name was trending on twitter… I’m of two minds about this. On the creator side, this is the problem when you intentionally mine the lore of established work and get people excited with a lot of vague teasing instead of telling complete singular stories. On the fandom side? It makes me realize how many people don’t realize the show their watching? Because we’re just getting little adventures that will sometimes tap into that broader stuff, but there isn’t going to be these big serial arc-ing plots (or at least we won’t get them for awhile). They’re, like, not even doing week to week beats.

-Okay it’s Chapter 12 and instead of a one word naming convention for every fourth episode they went with another “the” episode… I take it I’m the only one bothered by the inconsistency? Probably just me?

… Yeah, sounds about right.

Until next time!

<3HULK