Exchange Student (Patreon)

Ethan: And smile!
*click*
Ethan: Good enough. I guess someone is nervous to start school tomorrow.
Brad: I should be working on my thesis, not reciting south American capitals in junior high. Again.
Ethan: You’re missing the point. Again. You are working on your god awful personality. You missed that last time around puberty.
Brad: So I make you a little sad and you, somehow, force me to relive puberty in someone else’s body?! Fuck you, Ethan!
Ethan: This body is all your own, and as your legal guardian I can’t tolerate such language.
Brad: Or what?! What can you do you haven’t already done to me?  And how can you be my legal guardian? We’re both fucking 22!
Ethan: You’re 15 next month, and you’ll stay that age until you’ve figured out how to be a person. How to make friends. How to be kind to people. I’ll have you move from school to school, state to state if I have to. 15-ish until you’ve given up ever being someone else again. I’m not turning you back until you manage to make some genuine friends, and don’t want me to anymore. Oh, you thought this was just for a week or something?
Brad: You sick, perverted sadist!
Ethan: You’ve seen what I can do. Trust me when I say you could be much worse off than an athletic heartthrob. Every time you slip up and say you are not 14, or I am not your loving, elder brother taking care of you after our parents fatality, you are going to become slightly less attractive. In fact, every time you disobey me I will change something.
Brad: I hate you!
Ethan: See! Playing teenager isn’t hard at all.