Why Are They Chasing Me Even If I Don’t Have Any Emotions? (Patreon)

3. Morbidness

Bai Yun sat in silence, his eyes fixed on the records in his diary as he recalled the past. The memories flooded his mind, and he could feel the weight of them bearing down on him.

Back then, Chang Ai was like a blank sheet of paper until his darkness stained her.

Under the weight of his accumulated favor, Chang Ai had been powerless to resist his advances. With a simple simulation, she had confessed her feelings for him, and he had taken her in his arms.

It had all been so simple, so easy, but it was a pity that the one who had truly loved her had already disappeared. In his place was a man with no emotions, a man who was nothing more than a shell.

Bai Yun pinched his hand and invoked a simple incantation, cleaning up the spilled tea as he heard the sound of the door opening. He quickly composed himself, his impassive expression transforming into a warm and gentle one, his smile as charming as a sequenced reaction.

Just as he had written in his diary, he wanted to be popular, to be well-liked by everyone. And so he had studied people's behavior, their expressions, and their reactions to the tiniest detail, to fulfill this desire. He had settled on the template of the warm, handsome guy, and he had become that person, even if it was nothing more than a façade.

So, when Bai Yun saw the girl standing drenched in the rain at his door, he was momentarily stunned. He hesitated for a moment before sighing softly and pulling out a towel from his storage bag.

"Here, take this and dry yourself quickly, unless you want to catch a cold," he said, offering the towel to her. He did not ask why Chang Ai didn't use Qi to dry herself. He knew that at her level, even changing the weather was possible.

Chang Ai didn't speak, instead looking at Bai Yun with a face soaked with rain and perhaps even tears.

Bai Yun wasn't surprised that Chang Ai had returned. In fact, he had expected it. He was all too familiar with the girl before him, and he knew firsthand about her willfulness.

"You may get sick if you act like th-" Bai Yun stopped midsentence as Chang Ai's hand tightly gripped his own, her fingers trembling with a mix of fear and desperation.

Bai Yun's mind raced as he tried to understand the reason for her sudden action. Was it an attempt to gain his attention? Or was there something deeper, hidden beneath her actions?

Taking a deep breath, Bai Yun slowly lifted the girl's face, his eyes locking onto hers with intensity.

Despite the rain that had soaked her clothes and hair, Chang Ai's beauty was not diminished. In fact, the droplets of water seemed to add a sense of fragility to her appearance, making her all the more pitiable.

But Bai Yun really couldn't care less about it, and seeing that the situation would not resolve itself, he took action.

Bai Yun's expression changed into a serious one as he said, "Don't be so stubborn. Here."

"..."

Chang Ai finally raised her head, staring at the young man in front of her. Her gaze contained a hint of fear, the fear of losing it all.

Chang Ai's voice trembled as she spoke, her lips tightly pressed together. "Xiao Yun...I had thought about it, but let's not break up, okay? Please..."

Bai Yun gently wiped away the water stains from her face and looked at her with a serious expression. "The Chang Ai I know, wouldn't be so obsessed with a boy like this."

Tears welled up in Chang Ai's eyes as she spoke, her voice barely above a whisper. "But...But I really can't live without you!"

"Chang Ai, nobody in this world truly can't live without someone, no matter what they may say. People's feelings are fickle, and you may forget about me after a few months." Bai Yun's voice was soft yet it sounded harsh to her.

Bai Yun said lightly, withdrawing his hand from her grasp, and repeating, "Clean yourself then leave when the rain stops."

"Why?!" Her voice was shrill, a sound Bai Yun had never heard from the girl before him.

Before Bai Yun could respond, he was suddenly pushed down by Chang Ai. He fell with a thud as she sat on his stomach and hit him with her arms. The blows were heavy, and Bai Yun almost coughed up blood from the initial hits.

"What's wrong with me? Tell me! You're breaking up with me so suddenly...Xiao Yun, I can really change..." Her strength gradually weakened as she spoke, and she leaned gently on his arms.

Bai Yun, still shaken from the blows, thought for a moment about how to handle the situation.

Chang Ai was undoubtedly a qualified girlfriend who cared for him deeply, but that was also the problem. She cared a bit too much.

Although she could be coquettish and make unreasonable demands to test him, she was still a very good girlfriend.

It's just a pity.

Bai Yun never really cared about their relationship.

Whether their relationship was toxic or not didn't matter to him. Her cute and willful side never allured him. He didn't get angry when she annoyed him, nor did he feel happy when she pampered him.

The reason for their breakup was simple. She had been taking up too much of his time.

Chang Ai clung to him like glue, even to the point of cutting into his cultivation time. Even when she was on a mission, she would force him to stay by her side.

Bai Yun understood her reasons, but understanding did not equate to acceptance.

Even though she is excellent, Bai Yun had grown too brilliant for her now. Chang Ai had seen how several junior disciples looked at him with longing, even faking various problems to get close to him.

The strong sense of crisis brought about her suspicion, which fed onto her possessiveness and ultimately made it spiral out of control.

Bai Yun noticed this, so he made the decision to break up with her.

He couldn't delay any longer to fulfill all the wishes he had written in his diary. The diary was the beacon that had guided him in life since he lost his emotions.

Of course, making Chang Ai fall in love with him was also recorded in the diary. However, her weight was not comparable to giving up all the other wishes he had written down.

Similarly, the slight yandere feeling that Chang Ai had been giving off lately did not bode well for his plan to complete all his wishes in the most optimal way.

Her morbid emotions were sure to disorient his life if he continued to indulge her. So, he decided to cut her off. Undoubtedly a cold move on his part.

If he still had emotions, his choice might have been different, but the current him could only make rational decisions. He knew that if he didn't take action now, he couldn't guarantee that Chang Ai wouldn't suddenly attack him in a few years, with the conviction that if she couldn't have him, no one could.

Bai Yun has no emotion, and no fear, so naturally, he is not afraid of death.

And, Chang Ai's feelings for him may be a little morbid and distorted.

But, when it comes to morbidity,

Who can match him who is just a shell of a man driven solely by rationality?

He simply decided that the sequence of "Survival" was higher than that of "Chang Ai".

So, Bai Yun pushed Chang Ai away with a little bit of force. He stood up slowly, his expression cool and detached. "Chang Ai, stop making trouble," he said, his voice devoid of any emotion.

The girl stumbled back, her eyes wide with shock and hurt. She bit her lip so hard that traces of blood could be seen.

"Ah!..."

Bai Yun's gaze never wavered from her. "You can take the towel and dry off, then return," he said, his voice still cold.

Chang Ai's voice was shaky as if trying to hold herself together. "Do you like someone other than me?" she asked, her eyes blank, staring at something unknown.

Bai Yun could see the desperation in her eyes, he knew that answering positively could lead to a very deadly scenario.

So, he shook his head and replied, "No, how is it possible."

Hearing the answer, Chang Ai wanted to speak something, but words did not come out of her mouth. In the end, she bit her lips and walked towards the door, away from his cold gaze.

Finally, Chang Ai left the house, leaving darkness behind her path.