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Like every day at work, I have to stand under the president's desk and lick her tights, for four hours straight, wait for her to come back from break and then start again for four hours.

Oh yes, it's the most beautiful job in the world, her tights smell so bad and the smell stays in my mouth until the next day, and every day it smells more intense.

Yes, Friday is my favourite day, because the smell is more intense than other days..

what a perfect life.

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