Never Give a Yandere a Bolter [A Cliche (Yandere) 40k Romcom] Ch.22 (Patreon)
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“Yer sure this is fine,” Octus asked.
“It should be acceptable,” Ashe answered. “It is my personal ship in all by name. And we are now… partners? Apologies, I do not know how to name our relationship yet, Octus. Still, you should feel free to requisition it as the first of your fleet. She’s not much but-…”
Octus scoffed, “Not much? Yer kiddin’, right? Sure… it’s ‘just’ a Frigate… A fully-armed, well-stocked, taken-care-of Sword-class Heavy Frigate… ‘Only’ almost two kilometers long… And ‘only’ armed with enough weaponry and firepower to nuke a planet from orbit…”
Ashe hid a smile at Octus’ uncharacteristic knowledge and passion for void ships, “You seem to be quite familiar with the vessel.”
“Ah… I just like ships, that’s all,” Octus said sheepishly.
Ashe’s ship was a thing of beauty for Octus. He had watched it grow bigger and bigger as they approached through the cockpit glass of their transport craft. Then they’d landed in the open maw of the ship’s hangar and stepped into the majesty of an Imperial void ship. No matter how many times he traveled on these feats of Humanity, void ships never failed to take Octus’ breath away. Sona, Violet, Diana, and Miko had reacted with similar awe.
The ship was named the ‘Immortal Spirit’ and Octus could not think of a more fitting name for it. Ashe had regaled him with some of its histories while they walked through its grand, gothic halls. Built during the early days of M.33, the Immortal Spirit was a ship that never gave up. Every scratch on its hull represented another year of its millennia-long history of service and battle.
The Immortal Spirit was still obviously loved by those who crewed it though. It was an enduring vessel and though its age showed, it wore those years well. Its halls were clean. Its trimmings still glittered. The voidsmen who bustled to and fro were comfortable and familiar as if in their element aboard the ship.
Through battle after battle, century after century, the Immortal Spirit persisted. And though they lived and died — and were even born — aboard the Immortal Spirit, the crew persisted as well. Every life that passed through its halls was immortalized in some small way. From the thousands of Captains to the millions of serfs and slaves, the ship carried their ‘immortal spirits’ with it.
Ashe said that the crew was approximately 25,000 strong, including the serfs and slaves on the lowest decks that kept the ship’s underbelly running smoothly. That wasn’t including her personal regiment of Guardsmen and women. That ‘small’ regiment added another 50,000 to the ship’s standing population. And that 75,000-person population was still a mere pittance when it came to Imperial void ships.
But it was still 75,000 people. 75,000 people who Octus now had at his beck and call. Something that was both shocking and daunting when Octus realized it. The most he’d ever had under his command was a squad of 10…
If not for Sabine and Sona’s constant presence at his side, Octus would have started to freak out again when he realized a small taste of the power he now wielded. He’d calmed himself by putting it out of his mind for now. After all, it wasn’t as if he had any of their direct loyalties. The crew still answered to the ship’s Captain and Ashe first and foremost. They didn’t even know Octus existed yet.
Octus and Ashe stood together on the second-tallest spire on Ashe’s Heavy Frigate. Second tallest only because the tallest spire belonged to the ship’s Navigators and their quarters. The others, bar Alastor, were either settling in officer’s quarters that Ashe had set aside for them or — in the case of Lady, Lilya, and the other Sororitas — were organizing their faction’s withdrawal from the planet’s surface.
Alastor was so silent, even when moving, that Octus could almost forget he was there. Of course, it was impossible to completely forget about a nine-foot-tall demigod who has been assigned to your safety. That cat was out of the bag when Alastor revealed himself in the first place.
And the Custodes had certainly drawn quite a bit of attention on their journey there. Octus was sure some of those who witnessed Alastor’s glory had had heart attacks on the spot. Those who didn’t faint outright fell to their knees in supplication before Alastor’s glorious golden form. So really, it was impossible for the Custodes to not draw attention to himself.
Octus was sure that if the ship’s captain wasn’t aware of their presence before, they were by now. A genuine Custodes on your ship was not something that could be ignored. Thankfully, Ashe had nipped that in the bud before it could become an issue. She’d already sent word to the Captain, requesting their presence so she could explain… some things.
Ashe and Octus (and Alastor) were currently waiting for the Captain to arrive. Octus was fidgeting a bit but thought he kept his cool pretty well overall. The view from their venue certainly helped in that regard. Ashe had chosen the ship’s arboretum-cum-observation dome as the location Octus would meet the Captain.
The space had been decently crowded by officers just minding their own business. Once Ashe, an Inquisitor, made her presence known, they’d all cleared out as quickly as they possibly could. Octus couldn’t blame them for that, even if he wasn’t quite comfortable with the deference being shown to him by proxy. Alastor’s presence probably didn’t help either. Anyone with an ounce of self-preservation would quickly find something else to do when the ship’s Inquisitor, a Custodes, and an unknown walked into the room.
And so the three of them were left alone in the sprawling garden atop the ship’s second-tallest spire. It was a beautiful place. Trees of exotic and ordinary origins lined stone pathways that spread out like a spiderweb through the garden. Flowers were arranged tastefully upon the banks and beneath the shade of the trees. A small fountain sat in the center of it all. Dedicated as a monument to the Emperor, the fountain spewed out life-sustaining water just as the Emperor’s light sustained the Imperium of Man.
A clear dome covered the entire garden. Though the dome looked to be made of glass, Octus knew it wasn’t. All of the windows on void ships were made of a thick glass-like compound and interwoven with meshes of plasteel. Through the dome, one of the most amazing views on the ship — second only to the views from the bridge and Navigator’s quarters — was visible.
The golden-armored prow of the Immortal Spirit looked as if it was holding up the planet of Charon Prime. An orb that held billions of Human lives was perched between the wings of the Aquila figurehead on the front of the void ship. Charon Prime was painted in browns and grays from a millennium of Hive World pollution and wasn’t that nice to look at by itself. But what it represented was spectacular.
It was an Imperial World set in an ocean of stars. Proof that Humanity had reached the heavens and conquered them despite the difficulties and impossibilities of that task. Proof of the vast scale of the Imperium and Humanity itself across the galaxy. Proof that Humanity would not go gently into the dying light…
Octus enjoyed the view in silence while they waited for the Captain of the Immortal Spirit, trying to ignore the sudden changes in his life and the presence of the Inquisitor and golden demigod by his side. Some of those thoughts still slipped through the gaps though. He was a Rogue Trader… There was no denying the reality of his elevation in status anymore.
Here he was on a ship that was his in all but name. Ashe had made it clear that she would defer to his decisions, only offering advice and guidance. Having his word suddenly bear so much weight was a heady feeling. He still didn’t know what he would do next.
The only clue he had in that regard was the Emperor’s mission on his Warrant of Trade. Octus was tasked with exploring the fringes of the Imperium. He was tasked with finding lost Human civilizations and bringing them back into the glory of the Emperor’s light. It was a daunting task…
But it was also everything he’d ever dreamed of. It was the beginning of those stories his Ma used to tell him when he was just a kid. It was adventure and freedom to travel the stars at his whims. It was a chance to matter and make his parents and sister proud of him.
A sudden snort escaped Octus’ lips. How would his parents react to all of this? How would his sister? They were proud enough when he managed to join the Imperial Guard. Now though?… Well, he’d certainly have some good stories to tell his sister when he saw her again.
“They will be so proud of you but not as surprised as you might think, Octus. Like Sister Sabine, your parents have always known you were special. They have always believed in you. The degree of your success will be shocking but they have come to expect that from you,” Alastor said suddenly, making Octus jump slightly. Ashe stayed quiet, just observing the coming interaction between the new Rogue Trader and his Custodes.
“Anyone ever tells ya that ya can be creepy as fuck?” Octus snarked crassly.
Beneath his helm, Alastor smirked, “It does not come up often. Not many have the courage.”
“Well, ya are. Silent as a damned mouse until ya ain’t. I dunno how it’s possible to forget about a nine-foot-tall mountain of gold but somehow ya make that work.”
“I will take that as a compliment, Octus. After all, your safety is paramount. My capabilities have served me well while guarding you for 22 years.”
Octus scoffed, “Say that to Ma and she’ll decide that yer basically family. Hope ya like Grox roast casserole ‘cause she won’t take no for an answer.”
There was a momentary pause and Ashe witnessed something she never thought she’d see. Alastor shuddered vigorously enough for it to be barely visible through his bulk and armor, “… Well, I suppose it would be nice to sit at the table with family for once…”
“If ya’ve been with me my entire life, ya know damn well that my Ma can’t cook for shit,” Octus said, fixing the Custodes with a knowing look.
Alastor adamantly refused to admit his reluctance to partake of the Humblestock matron’s cooking, “… Family dinners are about the companionship, not the quality of the dishes…”
“And if I somehow get my sis out of the Schola so she can cook for us?” Octus asked, his amusement steadily rising.
Alastor’s body language visibly perked up, impossibly expressive for a demigod completely clad in golden armor, “For some reason, I can barely contain my excitement for my first family dinner now. In fact, we must hurry back home as soon as possible. And maybe make a short pitstop along the way. I just so happen to know which Schola facility your sister is learning in. What a coincidence…”
Octus couldn’t hold it anymore and burst out laughing at Alastor’s blatant excitement to taste his sister’s cooking. To be fair to the Custodes though, it was worth it. She cooked meals fit for the Emperor and his Primarchs with enough leftovers for all 18 of them to take home doggy bags. Ashe just watched baffled as Octus and Alastor interacted like old friends.
In a way, they were. Alastor had spent more time with Octus than Octus had spent alone in his entire life. The Custodes was always there, standing an invisible vigil over the one he’d been charged to protect. It was not an exaggeration to say that Alastor knew Octus better than Octus knew himself. For the past two decades of his nearly-immortal life, Alastor had been dedicated to Octus and his safety.
As Octus laughed himself silly, a rumbling feminine purr of a voice interrupted the scene from over by the arboretum’s elevator, “Ashe! Please tell me why there is a Custodes on my ship!? A little warning would have been nice! At least then I would’ve been able to greet… him… myself…”
The source of the voice came into view and trailed off as she caught sight of Alastor and a still-laughing Octus. Her eyes widened. Her slitted pupils dilated like a cat entranced by a shiny bauble or a laser pointer. A fitting reaction considering Alastor’s aura and the intruder’s heritage.
The woman who barged into the scene was relatively tall but in the presence of her current company, she was tied for the shortest next to Ashe. She had fiery auburn hair and eyes the same shade and brightness as polished emeralds. Her manner of dress was elegant. A deep blue great coat decorated with trinkets, ornaments, and medals covered her torso. Form-hugging pants and thigh-high patent leather boots covered her lower half. A custom-made tricorn hat rested on her head, capping off her outfit.
But still, the most striking features of the woman were owed to her Abhuman heritage. She was a Felinid. A trait that was practically unheard of for a woman of her station. Cat-like ears, covered in fur the same color as her olive skin, flared upward from the sides of her head. They twitched with her shock, betraying her emotions as well as her expressive eyes.
The way she’d barged into the scene and the way she’d spoken to Ashe revealed the newcomer’s importance and familiarity with the Inquisitor. When added to her elegant outfit, that information made it easy to guess the woman’s identity as the Captain of the Immortal Spirit.
Ashe fought to keep her giggles inside from seeing her friend brought up short by Alastor’s presence but an amused grin still showed on her face, “Amelia, thank you for finally joining us. As you may have guessed, I have someone to introduce you to.”
Captain Amelia sputtered, fighting desperately to compose herself in the face of Alastor’s glory and consequently ignoring Octus for the moment, “I-I… M-My apologies, Your Grace… I-I seem to have spoken out of line.”
Alastor remained silent and still as a statue. Amelia began to fidget under the weight of the silence.
Ashe took pity on her subordinate-in-name-only. She tried to change the subject and introduce the new Rogue Trader who was just now wiping tears of humor out of his eyes, “This is Octus. He’s… a very important guest of mine.”
“Greetings and salutations, My Lord Octus,” Amelia bowed at the waist, misinterpreting Ashe’s introduction in her flustered state and still addressing Alastor.
Alastor’s voice was a deep, rolling rumble that hid the fact that he was smiling ever-so-slightly. He hadn’t had this much fun in centuries, “My name is not Octus. I am Alastor Solomon. The one Inquisitor Ashe was trying to introduce you to is my charge, Octus Humblestock. He should be the focus of your attention at the moment. Please, pay me no mind. I am simply a tool of His Will, no different than the ship you captain.”
A still-somewhat-chuckling Octus extended his hand to a confused Amelia, “Howdy, I’m Octus. Nice to meet ya, Captain. Don’t worry about the big guy there. He’s just some stray I seem to have picked up recently.”
Now, Amelia was suitably baffled, “Uh… hi? S-Stray? I… don’t think you can say that about one of the Emperor’s Companions.”
“You’ll find that the rules of common sense do not seem to apply the same around Octus,” Ashe sighed. “But that is one of the reasons I believe him to be important enough to unknowingly warrant a Custodes as his bodyguard…”
Amelia was sharp enough to catch Ashe’s underlying hint to drop it for now, “Very… well. Welcome aboard, Octus, Lord Alastor. To what do I owe this honor?”
“Ashe here,” Octus snorted. “Was kind enough to volunteer your ship to me.”
Amelia turned to Ashe with sparks of anger in her eyes, “I am being demoted? You would put a Guardsman in charge of my ship?? Have I not served you and the Emperor faithfully?!”
“You are not being demoted or removed, Amelia,” Ashe quickly reassured, glaring at Octus slightly. “Octus is being purposefully vague and not telling you the whole story.”
Octus shrugged, “It’s still pretty new. I’m not quite comfortable with my… position yet, to tell ya the truth.”
“Position?” Amelia asked with twitching cat ears, calming now that she knew she wasn’t being replaced.
“Maybe I should introduce you again…” Ashe muttered in consideration. “Amelia, meet Octus Humblestock, the Imperium’s newest Rogue Trader.”
Amelia deadpanned at both of them, “… A completely fresh Rogue Trader… just happened to be here… on this backwater Hive World… in full Guardsman kit?… Pull the other one.”
“Octus?” Ashe prompted.
“What?… Oh right! The Warrant,” Octus quickly picked up what Ashe was hinting at.
He pulled the scroll containing his new Warrant of Trade out of his pouch. Just by seeing the golden seal on the scroll that seemed to shine without light, Amelia was convinced. Though he didn’t realize it, Octus was the only one who could break that seal. It was tied to his very soul. Once opened, Octus handed it over to Amelia.
Amelia accepted the Warrant with reverence and awe. Golden ink sparkled under her gaze as she read. It was perfection, everything void ship captains dreamed about. It was power, enough to overturn entire systems with a word. It was freedom and vindication that the holder was the truest of the Emperor’s servants.
She slowly and carefully rolled up the parchment scroll as if she was afraid of damaging it. Octus accepted his Warrant back without a fuss.
“The Immortal Spirit is yours to command,” Amelia pledged.
The captain then gave Octus a considering look and began to walk around him in a circle, “But we’ll have to do something about the way you dress. We can’t have our newest Rogue Trader wearing such mundane clothes… And we’ll have to do something about your demeanor. You represent the Emperor now. Certain people in power will expect you to have a specific sort of disposition. You’ll need lessons, my Lord…”
“Oh, thank the Emperor!” Octus exclaimed in a great sigh of relief. “I already feel like I’m floundering. I could definitely use all the help I can get.”