Chapter 61: Cannon Balls of Doom (Patreon)

Oh hell no. First, he had to deal with a flying Cursed Rope with a mind of its own, now he had to deal with a squealing rabid gerbil ball that flew. But at this point, was it any surprise? The System wouldn’t make it easy for him when it excelled at making his life impossible.

The spiky ball flew at them like a bullet, turning on a dime and going right for Arsen, who jumped to the next platform with barely a second to spare. The man was grinning, his eyes alight with excitement.

The others had already started jumping from platform to platform as if they were running a hopscotch race. Logan shook himself out of his stupor and followed, taking a flying leap over to the next hovering platform, the crampons on his boots scraping the metal like nails on a chalkboard. It was a wobbly landing at first, and he had to swing his arms to not overshoot. The others were jumping without skidding all over the place. Their shoes must have a grip that counteracted it. After all, they’d known what this trial would consist of—they’d have to be stupid to come unprepared.

He needed to do something about these boots.

The crampons had been useful in the strength trial, but now, they were the opposite of ‘agile.’ As he pondered the problem, Logan kept a careful eye on the zooming ball at the other side of the round room.

Crouching, Logan pressed one hand to the platform. He had one advantage.

He was Canadian.

Being no stranger to ice, he knew that when you walked over a skating rink or over a frozen lake, you needed footwear that gave your feet a good grip.

With a frown of concentration, Logan dissolved the crampons and let the diamond dust fall to the platform. But he didn’t stop there. In the strength trial, stability and standing motionless had been the game, so he’d formed his boots into a solid mass. For this trial, he needed to be swift, to be able to run and jump at speed. Logan had a pair of shoes inside his spatial collar, but that wouldn’t stop him from sliding on the slippery surface.

He needed to craft a pair of boots that were lightweight that also gave him stability.

Ice cleats.

Logan let half the sandstone dissolve from his feet, a small pile of sand accumulating around him.

“Hah! It almost had me!” said Errol on the other side of the room.

Fuck.

He had no time. The rabid cannon ball was on its way over.

Heart racing, Logan shaped the sandstone around his feet, smoothing it, thinning it, making it as flexible as possible. At the last minute, he mentally latched onto a handful of diamond dust, and then raising one foot, swirled the dust into a mini tornado until he formed a cleat the size of a thumbtack. He sculpted it to the bottom of his shoe, creating a firm, unbreakable seal.

That was all the time he had; the ball was hurtling towards him, blue eyes glowing with a sadistic glint.

Taking a flying leap, Logan jumped to the next platform, the single cleat providing just enough stability so that he didn’t slide over the edge, the hurtling ball passing by him with inches to spare.

Holy shit, that had been close.

His discarded diamond dust was still nearby, well within the limits of [Mimicry Armour]. Logan reached, forcing it to hover and travel through the air, zooming towards his boot like a magnet.

One.

Two.

Three.

Four.

In rapid succession, he formed four thumbtack-sized cleats, giving himself five on one boot, and then repeating the process with the other. He’d completed it so quickly he felt the beginnings of a headache, but luckily, when he reviewed his Karma pool, it was holding steady, his regeneration rate keeping up with the drain.

“I’m at two!” shouted Arsen on his way past, the lithe man jumping from platform to platform as if he were taking a jog through the park.

“Three!” said Asthea. If Arsen was taking a jog, Asthea was sprinting. Her ponytail flying behind her, she darted from platform to platform in a zigzag, her face alight with excitement.

Goddammit! They must be referring to their agility increases, and Logan had yet to receive one. With a scowl like a thundercloud, he jumped to the next platform, this time copying Asthea in that same zigzag pattern, jumping right, jumping left. It took ten jumps before he received his first notification.

Ding!

[You have earned one Agility point!]

[Trial Update:

Asthea: 4 Agility

Arsen: 3 Agility

Errol: 2 Agility

Thorin: 2 Agility

Logan: 1 Agility]

Even though he was annoyed that he was so far behind, and he’d only received one agility point, he could sense an immediate impact, his jumps becoming more agile and reactive. Logan had nothing against Asthea—she could earn as many agility points as she wanted—but there was a massive problem with letting her win.

The Pure Grit Ring.

If Asthea won this trial and the System awarded her with the same ring, Logan would have no chance to turn the doubling power into tripling power. He needed that ring to grow strong, to find Ernie, to save Lara and the kids. That meant that just like the strength trial, he wasn’t giving up, even if it meant pushing himself to the limits and beyond.

It also meant that he had to beat Asthea.

Logan followed the same zigzagging pattern, keeping an eye on the spiky ball as it zoomed past. So far, everyone had been able to dart away from it—even Thorin. If one rabid ball were the limits of this trial, maybe it wouldn’t be so bad.

Ding!

[You have earned one Agility point!]

[Trial Update:

Asthea: 5 Agility

Arsen: 3 Agility

Errol: 3 Agility

Logan: 2 Agility

Thorin: 2 Agility]

Logan had caught up with Thorin, which made sense, since the man was laboring. His rapid pants could be heard across the room, and he often needed to pause on a platform, keeling over and staring at the ground down below.

“Get ready, Asthea!” shouted Arsen, pointing at the ceiling. “Another one is coming! They’ll speed up now.”

Thorin moaned, his face looking green.

Logan should have known better. When had anything ever been easy?

Up above, the same cat-door sized hole opened, and another rabid ball with glowing blue eyes zoomed forward. This one let out a sound like a meat-grinder, a rattling that made his ears bleed. Talk about meat grinder—its spikes were twice the length of the other ball, each point narrowing at the ends like a swordfish. Now, they had to keep track of two balls—both flying at them in different directions.

And—holy shit! The ball was flying right at him! Logan barely dodged, the ends of its spikes an inch away from his back, a breeze against his neck evidence of how close it had come.

The cannons had gotten faster.

The original ball made sadistic sounds of glee, while the new one flew past and let out that meat-grinder screech. It was as if they were in an arcade game, and Logan and the others were the targets.

Ding!

[You have earned one Agility point!]

[Trial Update:

Asthea: 6 Agility

Arsen: 4 Agility

Errol: 4 Agility

Logan: 3 Agility

Thorin: 2 Agility]

This time, Logan didn’t have a spare second to glance at the trial update before Thorin let out a scream. The meat-grinder ball had clipped him in the shoulder, its sharp, long spikes digging through his shoulder-pad armour.

With a roar, Thorin was suddenly holding his massive sword, his face frantic with pain.

“Thorin, no!” said Arsen.

It was too late. Thorin whacked the ball, throwing it to the side and smashing it to the floor.

“You idiot,” Arsen said underneath his breath.

Up above, the ceiling opened again, and with a feeling of dread, Logan watched as another two balls emerged. These ones were so large they had to squeeze through the hole. They were the size of three bowling balls, shards of glass littering their surfaces and glinting in the glowing blue light. The balls’ eyes were red instead of blue, and creepily, they seemed to have a mouth—or what resembled a mouth. It curved upwards, reminding Logan of a smiley face, shards of glass-teeth glinting like a jack-o'-lantern.

“Get ready,” said Arsen. “This is about to get twice as hard.”

But so far, the balls only had eyes for Thorin. The man blanched and started jumping from platform to platform, doing everything he could to make himself into a less-easy target. All three balls went after him—the original blue ball cackling in glee, the other two glass shard balls making grinding, crackling sounds. Even worse, they came at Thorin from different directions, surrounding him and making it impossible for him to dart away.

With a boom, all three balls impacted at once, the blue ball lodging into Thorin’s leg with a screech, the glass shard cannons hitting the back of his head and back. These balls were triple the size of the original cannon, and boy, did they do damage. Logan’s stomach lurched as he watched blood spray in a torrent.

Thorin moaned in pain and then dropped to his knees, blood pooling at his feet and making it difficult to stand. With a screech and a crackle, the balls tugged themselves free of Thorin’s flesh and then went zooming in different directions.

Asthea came to a stop on her platform, her hand covering her mouth in horror. “Oh, Thorin.”

“Focus,” Errol said, jumping past her. “It’s a trial dungeon, remember. Even if he dies, he’ll be okay.”

“I know! I still can’t stomach it! Plus, he’ll miss out on the additional attribute points.”

Errol gave Logan a dark glance, his eyes full of held-back fury. “And if someone hadn’t sabotaged him, he would have made it.”

Oh, come on. The fact that Thorin had worn himself out in the strength trial wasn’t Logan’s fault. He could have conceded at anytime. Still, Logan had learned something new. It was a trial. It was supposed to be an opportunity to increase your attributes through hard work! Logan hadn’t once thought it was this dangerous. But then again:

[In this trial, if a Non-Player Character (NPC) kills you, your death will not be permanent.]

[The death nullability applies to NPCs only.]

Logan had thought the System had been referring to the second part of the trial, the mysterious army trial. Were the NPCs the cannon balls?

He didn’t have any further time for speculation. The balls were flying everywhere, this time at twice the speed. If he stayed in place, he’d soon end up like Thorin.

Adrenaline shooting through his system, the possibility of dying ever present in his mind, Logan quickened his pace, his feet agile, jumping so quickly his boots barely had a second to land on one platform before he was on to the next. Even though the rules stated that your death wasn’t permanent, Logan wasn’t dying today, thank you very much.

Ding!

[You have earned one Agility point!]

[You have earned one Agility point!]

[Trial Update:

Asthea: 7 Agility

Logan: 5 Agility

Arsen: 5 Agility

Errol: 5 Agility

Thorin: 2 Agility]

Yes! He was gaining on everyone, even with everyone but Asthea. Logan dug deep, putting on an extra burst of speed, this time making his own pattern. Zigzags worked, but what if he doubled back, jumping backwards and forwards, making himself into an impossible target. Turning, he—fuck!

That had been a mistake.

One of the glass cannons had hit him with a glancing blow, clipping his shoulder with a grinding, crackling shriek. With a shout, Logan staggered, wobbling before he regained his balance. But… Logan glanced at his shoulder.

The armour had held up.

Not a dent to be found: the Logan-exoskeleton was paying dividends.

Meanwhile, Asthea was having serious trouble, hissing in pain as the smaller cannon clipped her on the back of her calf, forcing her to fall to the next platform rather than jump. She got to her feet with a groan, but it had done considerable damage, and a pool of blood trickled down her leg.

That gave Logan an idea.

Logan had armour over his hands, arms, and around his neck. But he’d never deactivated the camouflage. The cannon balls could see him since the rest of his body was visible, including his orange kitten-patterned swim trunks. But once he reformed the whole suit, the mimicry effect would kick-in, and Logan would be invisible.

This would take some serious finagling though. He couldn’t stand motionless—not unless he wanted to make himself a target, so he’d have to form the rest of his suit while he was darting from platform to platform.

He could do this.

Feeling like his insides were vibrating in excitement, Logan jumped onto the latest platform and then paused, giving himself five seconds, five seconds only. Willing half a bucket of sand out of his spatial storage so quickly he might as well have given himself whiplash, he forced each grain to latch onto his chest before he jumped to the next platform, a cannon ball missing him by an inch—if that.

Already rushing to the next platform, Logan jumped mindlessly while he concentrated on forming the sandstone, connecting the chest plate to his forearm guards and then linking them to the armour around his neck.

Ding!

[You have earned one Agility point!]

[Trial Update:

Asthea: 7 Agility

Logan: 6 Agility

Arsen: 5 Agility

Errol: 5 Agility

Thorin: 2 Agility]

Again, he continued, pausing for five seconds, willing out more sand and spreading the armour while he leapt to the next platform. Each plate of armour spread the camouflage effect even further to the point where Logan’s legs and head were the only thing exposed, effectively making him into a half-formed Invisible Man.

Ding!

[You have earned one Agility point!]

[Trial Update:

Asthea: 8 Agility

Logan: 7 Agility

Arsen: 6 Agility

Errol: 6 Agility

Thorin: 2 Agility]

Errol turned his head, looked at Logan and then did a double take. “Cheater!” he bellowed. “He has an invisibility skill!”

Logan paid him no mind and in fact, was relieved more than anything. He’d been worried that when they saw him removing buckets of sand from his spatial storage, they’d become suspicious of his ‘garbage grade’ spatial storage, but if Errol thought it was a skill, all the better.

Arsen paused on his platform and glanced at Logan with a furrow in his brow. “He’s—” Whatever he’d been about to say was cut off as one of the glass balls slammed into the side of his face. Blood and what looked like a tooth went flying. “Oh the clan,” he cursed, spitting out a bloody glob of saliva with a glower.

In the meantime, Logan had managed to form the exoskeleton over his legs and head and was sculpting it over the sides of his face. To this point, he’d never fully become Iron Man. Who would want to encase their face in armour, covering their nose and mouth? It seemed like a bad idea all around.

And yet, the skill was called [Mimicry Armour]. If the System hadn’t designed it to protect his whole body, then it had to be a pretty shitty skill. If he didn’t try, he’d never know. He’d seen too many fantastical things. From talking octopuses, to undead monsters, to weird wizard-shit. Covering his whole face had to be the least of it.

Holding his breath, Logan grabbed another handful of sand and then followed the same process as the rest of his armour, treating it as routine—just another day at the office. Willing the sand onto his forehead, to his nose, to his upper lip, Logan formed it into the exoskeleton material, giving himself a face mask. Then, with one last prayer, he formed it over his eyes.

Just like that, the mask fully formed, covering both his eyes and mouth and…

Logan could see.

Logan could see better than before.

He could breathe; there was no restriction whatsoever and the exoskeleton was so lightweight, it was if he weren’t wearing it at all.

Kick ass.

And even better, he'd come to a stop on the platform, but the cannon balls had just flown past.

He was invisible.

Hell yeah. Logan was going to smoke the hell out of this trial.

Grinning underneath his face mask, he jumped to the next platform, his feet light, the flush of success making him even speedier. Platform to platform, zigzag after zigzag; he could focus on his movements rather than having to monitor the cannon balls as they continued to zoom past, oblivious to Logan’s presence.

Ding!

[You have earned one Agility point!]

[You have earned one Agility point!]

[Trial Update:

Asthea: 9 Agility

Logan: 9 Agility

Errol: 7 Agility

Arsen: 6 Agility

Thorin: 2 Agility]

Now, Asthea and Logan were neck and neck, but it didn’t matter. She was a target, and Logan wasn’t.

Ding!

[You have earned one Agility point!]

[You have earned one Agility point!]

[Trial Update:

Logan: 11 Agility

Asthea: 9 Agility

Errol: 7 Agility

Arsen: 6 Agility

Thorin: 2 Agility]

He was jumping so quickly that they others didn’t have a chance to gain an additional point before he’d gained two. Logan passed Errol, who had paused on a platform, holding his arm, which looked dislocated, the man’s face in a perpetual scowl.

Arson’s face was a bloody mess, two front teeth missing, a deep cut running down his chin and neck. Still struggling, still jumping from platform to platform, but his speed had noticeably dipped, and his feet weren’t as lithe as before.

As far as Asthea, without Logan, the cannon balls seemed to target her specifically, as if trying to eliminate the strongest opponent, repeatedly swarming her at once, forcing her to duck and jump, crouch, and dart to the side rather than jump to the next platform.

Ding!

[You have earned one Agility point!]

[You have earned one Agility point!]

[…]

[You have earned one Agility point!]

[Trial Update:

Logan: 20 Agility

Asthea: 10 Agility

Errol: 8 Agility

Arsen: 7 Agility

Thorin: 2 Agility]

Hell yeah, he was an agility master! As he earned each agility point, his feet only grew faster, making it possible to earn his next point in less than half the time.

There was one problem.

Deploying his full armour meant that his Karma pool was depleting at a rapid rate, and Logan was about to run out. He needed to drop the suit before his airways grew tight. There was nothing worse than trying to run an agility obstacle course while you were choking to death.

With a sigh of annoyance, Logan released [Mimicry Armour], letting everything but his original boots and neck armour dissolve into sand. Reflexively grabbing the dust and throwing it into his spatial storage, he jumped to the next platform and pulled up his Karma pool. He needed to wait until it fully replenished before redeploying the same strategy.

5/510

7/510

9/510

11/510

Damn. Because he hadn’t fully released the armour, it was taking much longer to replenish. Logan would have to wait minutes before he could—

Oh fuck.

The cannon balls had come to a standstill, hovering in the air, glowing eyes blinking at Logan, the glass cannons grinning with glass shard teeth, their entire attention focused on him to the exclusion of everything else.