Black Velvet (48) (Patreon)

(A/N: this version of Black Velvet follows the original Black Velvet a lot more closely, but I’ve sort of cut a lot of the angst that was draining/dragging to write and read.  These characters are more developed and so are the characters around them.  Their motivations have changed quite a bit as well, but for the better I feel!  Also, the last line is a shout out to When Love Is Bitter (Nic is aromantic, so if it goes over your head don’t worry!)

—

Incoming Message (Charlie-Anne):
Did everyone make it home safe and without alcohol poisoning?

Incoming Message (Charlie-Anne):
There's a new episode of Cosmic Wonder tonight. I can bring pizza.

—

Charlie-Anne messages are a mid-day thought, and it reads in a way that she's forced herself into disregard or a sort of dismissal of the events of the party the night before.

I realize, uneasily, that she's not the only one.

Tobias won't meet my eyes, and on the rare occasion that he does, all I can imagine is another wall carefully being built. Each stone he lays feels like another in the bottom of my stomach.

—

"Charlie-Anne's texting you again!"

"This is an awful long break you're having from school," I'm trying not to think of Tobias.  This has included doing the dishes, washing my sheets, and sorting my books into alphabetical order.  I've run out of carpet and started vacuuming the living room rug when Nic curiously pops in.  The veggie chips that he's munching on are leaving a cloud of multi-colored dust beneath him. I have to yell for him to hear me. He mocks at that by cupping a hand over his ear. "Is your scholarship paying for this extended vacation?"

"Nah. Sewage pipe busted in the dorms," his voice raises easily over the noise to be heard, an admirable talent from shifting between umpire and runner, "they'll just extend the term. Don't pretend like you didn't miss me."

"That would be easier to miss you if," I swipe at the vacuum cord to move it out of the way and then snatch his bag of chips for good measure, "you weren't leaving crumbs where I just vacuumed."

"Oh, excuse me, Martha. Cosmic Wonder is tonight, huh? Tidying up for Charlie?" He grins toothily, eyebrows waggling with something distasteful. I retch in response, and he frowns. "What was up with last night?  Sharifa saw her try to kiss you."

"Don't," I say, more bothered by the fact that someone had seen the rejection than anything, and maybe just as bothered as I was by the act of doing the rejecting. Someone talking about Charlie-Anne in a less than flattering way makes my stomach hot. "... I'm not in love with every girl like you are.  Tell Sharifa to mind her own. Charlie-Anne is a good person."

"Who said anything about love?" Nic snorts, eyes rolling, "She definitely has a crush.  I'm just wondering if you've got a little crush.  It looks like you've got a little crush."  He points to the vacuumed floor.

"I'm just anxious,"  I huff,  "anyway.  Why does everyone think that?"

"Because it looks like it."

"You can have platonic friendships. It's healthy," I snip, suddenly vacuuming faster than before,

"Okay, mom."

"And that's what it is. It's platonic. Extremely platonic."

"Ah, huh. So she was platonically trying to play tonsil hockey with you?"

"Go away."

Nic ruffles my hair, eyes suddenly serious, less bright, and more like a warning label for poison than summer foliage in one shift of tone.

He flicks the off switch of the vacuum.

"Would it be platonic... If there wasn't a Toby in this equation?"

"... Well, there is, and you know that." I'm thrumming with frustration, "Tobias — he's always been part of the equation. Whatever equation. He's been there, and first, and more."

"... Yeah," Nic's nose wrinkles a little bit in irritation, but maybe I'm confusing worry with it, "speaking of..." his voice quiets to a secret thing, something I step towards to share,

"Speaking of?"

"Do you wanna tell me why he left my bedroom around three in the morning...  But didn't leave in his car until over two hours later?"

I turn and walk from the same voice that beckoned me moments before. I wrap the cord around the vacuum to busy my hands.

"Ask him yourself."

Nic snorts at that like it's a threat. It probably is, considering the near aggressiveness that comes from Tobias when he's feeling particularly secretive. I can't imagine that my brother would feel as free questioning him as he is questioning me.

"... Has he said he has feelings for you?

"Aren't you feeling uncharacteristically nosy today?"

"I heard your bedroom door close."

"Maybe I closed it.  Maybe it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter if he tells me he has feelings," I say it because I'm not confident enough in myself to voice something positive on the matter of how Tobias feels — not after the silence from today, "I'll still have feelings, even if he doesn't, so you'll have to get over it."

He taps a copy of  Blackholes and the Beginning against the coffee table. Charlie-Anne loaned it to me weeks ago.

"We know he has feelings.  That wasn't the question."

"Get over it."

"Sounds like Charlie will have to get over it." Nic frowns deeper. "... If you have that kind of crush on Toby, you should empathize with her crush on you. You gotta cut this girl off."

"Stop that." I snap, dismissive, "she's my friend. She was drunk and tried for more — it didn't work, and she wants friendship now. You don't just cut friends out because they feel more than you."

"Why?"

"Because she's not pushy about it.  It's demeaning towards everything that we have or that I see in her."

"Yeah? Doesn't it make you uncomfortable?" He squints a bit.

"Only that it hurt her."

"What happens when Tobias cuts you out — because he doesn't want to hurt you?"

"That's different. You're not making sense,"  I pick at my shirt, suddenly feeling a bit fretful by the comparison. My fingers dig deeper, twist the cloth further, and I can't focus on anything but the stretch of it between my thumb and index finger. "When you're serious, you don't make any sense. I can't tell what ends badly because to you — everything does."

Nic sighs, guilt flooding his previously stony face,

"Then... I'll leave you alone about it. If it goes sour, I won't say I told you so."

"I know."

My brother places his palms on my shoulders,  a small gesture that asks for forgiveness,

"Since this friendship with Charlie seems one-sided in its platonic qualities, how about if Joseph and I join you guys tonight?"

I stare at him, confused.

"It'll help solidify this as a friendship. I know it mostly worries me, but sometimes I'm glad you're kinder than I am."

"Yeah? Are you?"

"Yeah. Sometimes... Hope," He hums quietly to himself, but it sounds a bit sad, "... it's endearing, at least. Who could resent someone for that."

--

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