Coye 4.23 (Patreon)

Chapter 23 - The Good Doctor

Breakfast was nothing too fancy, just some fried eggs, orange slices, and toast with jam. Coye only had so much food at the ready. As they ate, the discussion turned to what they would do with themselves after Coye had his appointment. Suzette had to get back to work, given that she'd taken the day off yesterday, whereas Byng intended on taking some more time alone to work on grinding up quests without Coye's help. This news suited Shayla just fine, as it meant she'd get more quality one-on-one time with Coye. The only concern Coye had was over Byng would be all right on her own. Rather, he was concerned over what she'd told him the other day. He hoped she could figure out whatever she needed to, but deep down, Coye knew Byng could handle anything.

Everyone got dressed after eating their fill, Byng wearing the casual outfit she wore most of yesterday while Suzette slipped back into the sundress she came home from the bathhouse wearing. As for Shayla, she decided on a leotard with long black gloves and thigh-high stockings. Not that it mattered since she had to get back in the damn hat. Coye ended up donning all his adventuring gear, though. So long as he got a clean bill of health, there was no reason he couldn't get straight to work after all that playing around.

They departed Coye's cabin at around nine in the morning, and then they walked straight to the Guild. On their way to the gate, Shayla introduced her new friends to her telepathic abilities. Given that they would be out and about together in public, there was hardly a better time to get them used to hearing her voice in their heads.

Before they reached the Guild, the group came across a couple of people Coye recognized. They were sitting on a bench just off the curb nearest to the Peace Gate. It was the same group of adventurers that Coye saw depart two days ago, the ones who had dismissed him after his awkward attempt at wishing them luck.

Whatever their quest entailed, it didn't go well for them. All four adventurers were injured. Not fatally or even enough to stop them from walking around, but significantly so. The Catfolk Brawler girl was beaten and covered in welts and bruises all over her muscled body, injuries visible due to the loose martial arts gi she wore. The Elven Healer had used up so much of her mana that she was barely conscious, explaining why she wasn't doing her job. As for the two human Knights, their armor sets were all banged up and looked like they'd fall apart if they faced so much as a stiff wind.

As Coye got closer, the party of four stopped their idle chatter and stared. It took them a minute to recognize him. When they realized it was that weirdly quiet Half-Elf kid who ate alone in the cafeteria listening to bards, though, each of them showed surprise on their face. The other day they were talking about this guy behind his back and laughing at how awkward he was, yet here he was now with two girls hanging off his arms.

The two Knights felt especially shocked- they were among the many men in Cransmere who made a habit of visiting the Darkwood General Store even when they didn't need anything in particular for two very big reasons. And then there was Byng. Neither of the men could even tell it was her at first. Sure, they'd seen her around the Guild, but wasn't she just that grubby little Goblin with the annoying prank arrows? Was she always that hot?

In contrast, the two women in the party were looking at Coye with raised interest-or at least interest as much as the barely conscious Elf could muster, in her case. Both would admit that Coye was a little cute, but seeing him arm in arm with two beauties like this made them wonder if he possessed some exceptional quality they were missing out on.

Coye didn't know what to do about the way the four of them stared. It was a surreal feeling to be envied by men. He'd been openly checked out by women before, but not ones who'd written him off quite like this. He blushed, but otherwise, Coye tried to smile politely as they continued to walk closer.

Shayla's first reaction was to smile and rub it in. 'I told you they'd feel like idiots one of these days, didn't I?'

Byng could tell that Coye was a little uncomfortable, so she decided to have some fun with these clowns. "You got something to say to us, or are you guys just gonna stare? Huh?" She hissed, enjoying how her sudden snappiness shocked and embarrassed the four adventurers.

"N-No," the bulkier and taller of the two Knights, a man by the name of Windsor, spoke from within his bulbous, onion-shaped helm. "Sorry, we didn't mean- I... look, it's been a rough day." He sighed.

The shorter and lankier Knight, Trendson, nodded in agreement. "A big ass group of Boomballoos really roughed us up, as you can see."

"That really sucks," Coye frowned. If he were a more vindictive person, this would've been his chance to flaunt his own success to these people. He was a good boy, however. Even now. He rifled through one of his pouches and removed a red vial. "You guys want some help?"

The party of adventurers was now eyeing the healing potion in his hands like they were dying of dehydration. The Catfolk, a woman by the name of Rissa, eventually nudged Windsor in the elbow. He took the suggestion and got up off the bench to fetch the bottle. Before taking it, he looked Coye in the eyes and asked, "Hey- you, uh... you sure about this? We were-"

"We were laughing at you the other day..." Erreldi the Elf unhelpfully pointed out in her unfiltered state.

"Don't remind him, you dumbass!" Rissa hissed, scratching her companion's face.

Coye didn't care about that anymore, even if Byng and Suzette were visibly annoyed to learn about his brief run-in with these four. He merely gave them a soft smile and walked closer, pressing the bottle into Windsor's gauntleted fist.

"I just got my monthly top-up a while back. It's no big deal. We're all on the same team here, right?" He said. Coye was trying to be chill, but that proved easier said than done. He was embarrassed to grant this kindness, which made it seem all the more genuine.

The Knight was at a loss over what to say. The potion wouldn't be enough to heal them all, but it would at least patch them up enough to figure out what they wanted to do next. Such kindness was nigh unheard of around Cransmere. He bowed politely before the boy, saying, "I'm sorry about before. Thank you very much, um-"

"Coye, and don't go worrying about it. I just hope you guys feel better soon. Later."

And with that, Coye and his party continued walking to the Guild, leaving the four adventurers behind them to ruminate over how they'd once treated the kindly boy.

They were halfway to the front door by now, prompting Suzette to ask, "What exactly happened back there, Darling? Is there anything I should know about? I recognize those men- perverts, the both of them. They think I don't see the way they-"

"It's okay, Suzette," Coye laughed and pulled the woman from her dark thoughts. "It's really not that big of a deal. I just saw them head off the other day and tried to say goodbye, but it went awkward."

"Sure, but why'd you go giving them a handout? On top of them being a bunch of assholes, that's not gonna help them get stronger!" Byng cut in.

Coye shrugged. "I don't know. I guess it was an impulse?"

'You're way too nice for your own good, baby...' Shayla sighed. 'But it's not like that's a bad thing, I guess.'

Upon hearing the Pixie speak, Byng suddenly stopped walking and scratched the top of her head. "Ugh. Gonna be a while before I'm used to that."

"Really? How odd. It doesn't seem out of the ordinary for me." Suzette cupped her chin.

'Maybe that's because she's already used to hearing voices in her head?' Shayla snickered.

"You forgot to send that one exclusively to Coye, dear," Suzette gave Coye's hat a chilling smile.

'Shit- uh- force of habit...' Shayla gulped and tried to cover her tracks.

At least Suzette was capable of taking a joke. She let it slide, mainly because it was amusing to picture the way Shayla was sweating underneath the hat. Everyone was in high spirits as they entered the Cransmere Adventurer's Guild.

The dimly lit reception room was void of people and seemingly empty. However, as they approached the front desk, they heard Dorothy's voice coming from the records room. She started with a yawn, then called out, "One moment, just arranging some forms..."

Coye noticed her voice seemed haggard, more exhausted than usual. Coye hadn't seen her the day before, but he was hoping she would've recovered by now from whatever had taken hold of her the last time they spoke. The back door opened, and the Guild Mistress poked out from behind it. She froze where she stood upon seeing everyone at the front desk.

Specifically Coye, who may as well have been a Gorgon.

However, Dorothy wasn't the only one struggling to look directly at someone. Shayla couldn't look at Dorothy for more than a couple seconds. This had never happened before, and the Pixie clutched her temples.

Dorothy's negative emotions were reaching such new heights that they bled out around her, affecting anyone who was psychically in tune with the emotions of their surroundings. In other words, anyone with magical empath abilities was doomed to suffer a portion of what Dorothy was going through.

'Gah- holy shit!' Coye could feel Shayla shifting around on his head so that she didn't have to look in Dorothy's direction. 'I-I've never seen anything like this before! I didn't know it was possible for a human to feel so much mental anguish!'

The other three didn't need to be empaths to realize Dorothy wasn't herself. Not even Coye. Her subsequent actions communicated her state of mind plainly enough. The poor girl lost her breath, found it, then lost it again. She became lightheaded, her glasses nearly falling out of her face. Dorothy stood there for another few seconds before darting back into the other room, where she spoke when she was just out of view.

"Hi, Coye! And, um, e-everyone else! Sorry, I thought I found what I was looking for. I was wrong. B-Because I'm stupid like that."

"You said you were arranging forms, not looking for something," Byng reminded her with concern.

"You are so correct, Byng. Wow. I just... um... anyway, did you need anything? I can talk to you like this from here. While I'm looking for my, uh, missing... thing... ahaha. Don't be shy!"

Coye, Byng, and Suzette were all at a complete loss. They looked at each other before Byng nudged him in the elbow, and Suzette patted his back, both of them nodding towards the counter. Coye took the hint and spoke, "I was going to ask you if anyone was seeing Eschal right now, but... Dorothy, I'm a little concerned. It sounds like you might need to see him more than I do. Are you still not feeling well?"

"W-Why wouldn't I be feeling-" Coye could hear what sounded like an entire bookcase falling to the floor, every heavy tome in its repertoire tumbling down. "Shit. Shit, shit, shit...!" Dorothy hissed under her breath. "I mean-don't worry about me. I've never been better!"

As she began cleaning up her mess, Dorothy picked up on the implication that Coye needed to see the Healer. Was he okay? Was something wrong? Could she do anything to help? Too many questions raced through her overtaxed mind, and she rushed to the door, poking her head out through it to look at him. More precisely, she focused her eyes on his belt. Looking at his face would've been much too difficult for her like this.

"W-What about you, Coye? Why did you need to see Eschal? Is everything all right?" There was anxiety in her voice, more now than ever before. In the past, Dorothy would've still been concerned, but there might've been an underlying excitement that the Guild was about to rack up another payday over its Association-mandated Healer's fee.

Coye wasn't sure why Dorothy was so worked up over his health, but he did his best to assure her he was fine. "Yeah, I'm fine. This is just about what we talked about the other day. About how I've been going through some changes, remember? Pretty much all of them have been good changes," Coye took a moment to look at both pieces of his arm candy entourage with a modest blush. "But I've been avoiding getting a checkup just to be sure. I need to know for certain that there's nothing wrong with me. Y'know, make sure that the woods haven't gotten into my head or anything like that."

"Darling resisted the idea, but we girls have ways of getting what we want. I'm sure you know what I mean." Suzette giggled to herself.

"I... uh... I'm afraid I don't follow?" Dorothy dropped the ball and tilted her head, her cap threatening to tumble off of her just like her glasses did. "But that sounds like a good idea to me. If Eschal is awake, he should be free right about now. You can never be too sure with him, but remember you don't need to be afraid of waking him if he is not already up. I know how he looks, but he's not that bad. Really."

From the way she recited this, Shayla pieced together the fact that Dorothy must have given this speech often. Not the best sign of this mysterious Healer's character, but she didn't have the mental energy to comment on it. She was still reeling from Dorothy's negative aura.

Byng couldn't hold back her concern for much longer. She broke from Coye and made for the counter, lifting up the bar so she could come help if she was needed. "Are you sure you don't want to come along, Dotty? You're not looking too hot. Frankly, you look like shit... and that's putting it nicely."

"Oh," Dorothy pouted and slunk back into the other room. She remained there for a few seconds before again poking her head out. There was now a hairbrush hanging off the side of her hair, her clothes were a bit more neatly tucked in, and there was now an amateurish splash of makeup on her cheeks to make her look a little less pale. "As you can see, I'm fine. Fine as could be! Just... please take care of yourself, Coye? I... I'm busy. Otherwise, I would come along with you and make sure you're alright, but... Gods, I don't know what I would... um... ah... hah..."

"Dorothy?" Coye took a step forward out of concern, which sent the Guild Mistress scurrying back into the other room like a rat. He didn't know what was up with her, naive as he was. He naturally assumed something must've been incredibly stressful about her job today, which was something he couldn't directly help with. Not right now, at any rate. He decided to let her off easy for now, telling her, "Well, thanks for worrying so much about me. If everything turns out okay, I might want to take on some quests later. If you feel any better, do you think you could give me some advice on monsters and stuff?"

For a few seconds following his question, all that could be heard from the other room was silence. Then, the door opened again. Dorothy stepped out, staring at the floor. The Guild Mistress tugged at her long sleeves, her face a bright red even without the poor attempt at makeup. "Of course, Coye. If you really need my help, then... I'll be around. Always. Here, I mean. For you. And, um, all the other adventurers who need help..."

Coye picked up on the fact that Dorothy wasn't just stressed. Something was bothering her on a fundamental level, and there seemed to be a hint of sadness more profound than typical depression. As much as it worried him, he didn't know what to do about it. He had to get on with his day and hope she'd improve as time passed.

"All right. Feel better, Dorothy."

"You too, Coye..." there was a brief pause as she idled about. Dorothy was struggling to say something else, and after working up the courage, she asked, "By the way, um... how is your new house? Is it nice?"

"Yeah," he returned the question with a gentle smile. "It's small but cozy."

Dorothy grinned subtly. "How lovely," she muttered. Then, she shut the door and disappeared for good this time.

As odd as all that was, Coye wasn't given any time to linger on the situation. Byng and Suzette surprised him by suddenly linking up their arms again and quickly dragging him into the lounge to the left without so much as a word. Once they were there, they looked around and ensured no one else was present. The coast seemed clear, allowing the inquisition to begin.

Suzette kicked things off by asking a stern question, her expression suitably serious. "Darling, do you happen to have any idea as to what any of that was all about?"

"Um," Coye did his vapid, empty-headed blink and tilted his head. "No. I'm just as confused as you guys are. Why would I know anything?"

"Because Dotty was being all blushy-blushy and awkward and shy around you!" Byng growled, stomping her foot down at his persistent obliviousness. "We aren't the only ones who noticed this, right?" She didn't phrase the question directly at her or even look at the hat, but Shayla knew it was for her.

'Yeah, so...' The Pixie clicked her tongue and cradled her forehead, still suffering the effects of absorbing all that negative emotion. Revealing what she knew about the situation wasn't in her best interests, but Shayla had little choice given that other witnesses were present. 'I can't tell exactly what she's thinking, but that chick is even worse off than usual. I wish you could see what I see. There's like... a black, buzzing shroud emanating around her head. Real fucked up stuff. As for what caused it...' Shayla sighed. 'No idea if this is the main reason she's freaking out, but... when the big guy here was telling Dorothy about moving out, he blabbed his mouth and set a bunch of stupid shit that might've had some connotations he didn't mean. After that, she shut down mid-conversation and had to go take a nap.'

"W-Wait," guilt welled up within his heart, and Coye found it hard to breathe. "This is all my fault?"

Suzette looked at Byng, and they both frowned. Then, she asked, "Darling, what exactly did you say to her? Don't tell me you were flirting."

Coye blushed bright red at the accusation. "What?! No way! I... I couldn't do that with her, of all people!"

"Not intentionally," Byng countered. "But you do say a lot of unfiltered shit without thinking about it. You need to tell us the specifics, short-stuff."

"Dorothy seemed weirdly upset that I was moving out, so I told her everything would be okay. Then I said that I'd always be here for her whenever she needs me, and if that wasn't enough, all she had to do was knock on my door, and I'd come running to solve any problem she couldn't handle on her own." Coye shrugged. "I don't understand why that would be so upsetting!"

Suzette closed her eyes tight, her motherly instincts torn between her desire to rip this boy a new one and her willingness to barge into the records room and comfort that poor, poor girl. At the same time, Byng groaned and shoved her head into her palm. Her claws were digging into her scalp. Neither said a word, but they were overwhelmed with sympathy for the Guild Mistress.

"What?" Coye asked. "Am I not getting something here?"

Given that they'd agreed to Shayla's noninterference policy whenever it came to Dorothy, both Byng and Suzette were unbelievably annoyed that they couldn't just point out how blatantly romantic Coye's thoughtless comments were. He undoubtedly said these things with complete earnestness and a nary a flirtatious intention in mind. That just made it even worse.

The only consolation here was that even with the noninterference policy, Coye was apparently already steering things towards the desired outcome whether he knew it or not. They just hoped he wouldn't make things harder for Dorothy than he already had. Both girls understood how naive their optimism was.

"Forget about it, Darling. Just try and be more cautious with what you say around women." Suzette chided.

"So, I did say something wrong...?"

"Nope. And that's why it's so bad, short-stuff! Just take it from me and try not to think about her too much right now. Dotty will be fine as long as you give her some space, yeah?"

"What makes you so sure?"

"My female intuition!" Byng lightly flicked his nose with her fingers, feeling grumpy that her adorably stupid boy had begun the painful process of stringing along his Guild Mistress without even realizing it. Maybe Dorothy wasn't in love with Coye. Not yet, at least... but now it couldn't be denied she was on some level aware of him. Very aware.

'Enough about her!' Shayla shrugged while the boy rubbed his slightly stung nose with his hand. 'We have other shit to take care of, and I don't want to sit around talking about Dorothy for an hour! She's a grown-ass adult. She can handle this, and whatever she's feeling is not our problem!' Though her words were harsh, they were true.

It was better to speak this way, Shayla figured. The less time they spent dwelling on the Guild Mistress, the more time she had to process the way she felt about Dorothy and continue working on changing her mind. If Coye suddenly knew the truth that Dorothy was now looking at him differently, it might embolden him. Coye had at times proved cocky when emboldened, so that revelation had to be avoided at all costs.

Although Coye couldn't stop being concerned over his role in Dorothy's sour mood, he had no objections to getting on with what they came here to do. The group moved on, making their way to Eschal's office. Next to the staircase that led to the second floor was another set of stairs kept behind a closed door that would take them to the Guild's dark, dingy basement.

These stairs were made of stone, as were the walls and floors of the basement. This was to allegedly prevent nasty things from worming their way into the Guild from below ground. Being so close to the Gnarled Woods and the taint of the former Demon Lord, there was no telling how far the roots of corruption spread. It was a standard precaution among buildings in Cransmere. Making buildings entirely of stone would've been much more effective, of course, and indeed in the modern age, there'd been a slight increase in the number of stone buildings being constructed around the town.

Still, Cransmere was a town of lumberjacks and logging mills. People don't change their ways so easily. It was easier to blame the woods or the curse of Thalrad for all the failed attempts at returning Cransmere to its former glory rather than adopt radical new ways of thinking that offered harsh truths instead of comforting lies.

The basement stairs led to a large square room roughly as big as the lounge above. The room was lit by sconces liberally adorned on the walls and by a rusty chandelier set with red-colored candles hanging above their heads. Wax dripped down from the chandelier, pooling on the floor like bloody tears.

There were four doors in this room. Three led to different hallways with many rooms where various things were stored. One hallway connected to the kitchen above was stocked with food and whatever cheap swill passed for alcohol around here. Another of the halls was where all sorts of supplies were kept- paper, ink, quills, cleaning supplies, spare blankets and sheets for the dorm rooms, and so on.

The last of the three was where any possessions adventurers deposited into Guild storage ended up. Cransmere had nearly two hundred adventurers working out of it. While most were Bronze-ranked and didn't have many treasures to store, the ten Gold-ranked and the roughly fifty Silver-ranked members kept this vault bursting with loot. Behind that magically-secured door with its myriad defenses was a collection of mystic artifacts, supremely crafted armor, mighty weapons, and so much more.

Even a lesser Guild like Cransmere's must've held a fortune down there, but Coye only ever used it to store clothes.

The only room that wasn't locked was the one that mattered, and it was found to Coye's right. Its door was painted in a chipped yet foreboding red hue, lit by flickering sconces on either side. At the center of the door was a plaque that read, 'Eschal Paracelis, Healer', and below that was a rusted metal knocker in the form of an emblem with a cross and two intersecting scalpels.

"Fuck. This place never gets any less creepy, does it?" Byng observed.

"Nope," Coye shrugged. "Just another reason I don't like it down here."

"Creepy?" Suzette wondered aloud. "I rather like the aesthetic down here, personally. It has a quaint charm to it if you ask me."

'Why am I not surprised the old lady likes the creepy murder basement?' Shayla joked.

"You did it again, dear," Suzette informed.

'Fucking dammit-' Shayla tore at her hair as the older woman smiled and chuckled to herself out of amusement.

Coye wanted to get this over with, so he reached out and took the knocker, banging it several times with decent strength. Silence was the only response. Undeterred, Coye waited a good fifteen seconds before repeating the process. This time, a droll voice answered from behind the door. It was soft and understated, like an echo of an echo.

"How may I assist?"

"Hi, Eschal. I, um, wanted to see about getting a checkup if you aren't too busy with other patients?"

"And which one are you?"

"Uh... Coye?"

They heard the sound of papers being shuffled, but other than that, there was an extended silence.

"The short, blond, Half-Elf boy who looks like a girl," Byng helped.

"Hey-"

"Ah," the man said in recognition. "You. You should have just said as much. Enter."

Coye's embarrassment simmered under the surface, becoming visible by his red cheeks and irritated expression. Byng and Shayla responded with amusement while Suzette comforted him by placing her hand on his shoulder. With a sigh, Coye opened the door.

Eschal's office was like the rest of the basement. Unkempt, forgotten, and under threat of being consumed by darkness. If it weren't for the numerous blue-flamed candles arranged like a swarm of fireflies throughout the room, no one would be able to see a foot in front of their face. These candles illuminated many shelves of dusty books, ancient scrolls, and glass cabinets filled with jars, bottles, vials, and containers. Some of these were filled with medicinal potions, herbs, and other alchemical reagents, while the rest housed stranger things Coye believed best to remain ignorant of.

Shayla hated this place the second they walked in, and the creepy-looking man sitting at an alchemy table on the far side of the room certainly didn't help endear her.

Eschal was a tall, thin man, so gaunt that many of his features were sunken in. It was hard to measure his age, as it could have ranged anywhere from his thirties to his fifties. He wore a shabby black cloak over a black knitted sweater and tight black pants that clung to his legs, emphasizing his skeletal-like form. His sleeves rolled up, exposing one of the man's most concerning features. Halfway down his bony forearms were tremendous scars and stitches circling around front to back in a perfect circle. Below this perfect line, the rest of his arms, wrists, and hands were an unnatural color. Dark gray, with splotches of deep purple. They weren't his own.

Doing nothing to add to his charm, Eschal's face was even more off-putting than the rest of him. The man's hair was long and black, falling against his back to the floor like a weeping willow. His eyes were hollow, deep-set, blackened by shadows. Making eye contact with him was uncomfortable. Eschal inexplicably didn't possess pupils or even irises- only white pits. As far as Coye knew, he wasn't even blind. The worst of it all was the large facemask covering the entirety of his nose and lower face. It was shaped like a crow's beak and was sewn tight to his flesh, the area around the stitching blossoming a violet shade on his ghastly white skin.

It was scarcely a wonder why Coye and so many others feared Eschal when he appeared more like a ghoul waiting to pull you into your grave than a trained professional trying to pull you out of it. He was the sort of Healer whom parents told their children an apple a day would keep away.

Shayla was terrified at the sight of him, but Suzette remained nonplussed. They approached his alchemy table, taking notice of the three labeled doors behind him. One led to a sick room with many beds, one to his examination room, and the last to a private room for patients that required isolation. Knowing this, it became evident that the office they were standing in also doubled as his lab.

He regarded them with his white pits, and he held a large file in his corpse-like hands. After looking at Byng, he pulled another folder from a nearby drawer. Then, he gazed at Suzette and became puzzled.

"You," he pointed at Byng. "Bickerbramble rash, five months ago. 9,500G. Dislocated shoulder and a fractured humerus, seven months ago. 5,000G. Consultation on the topic of interspecies sexual and reproductive compatibility between the Gengaggi race and Human-Elf halfbreeds. Eleven months ago. First treatment, and thus free of charge."

"Gah! D-Don't fucking just read off my- nrgh...!" Byng had a taste of how embarrassed Coye felt throughout most of his life. Rather than feeling bad for her, he was mostly just feeling mushy about that consultation she'd had, which had to have been only a few weeks to a few days after they'd first met.

It was a tall ask of Shayla not to tease Byng over this, but the frazzled, bright red look on her face was satisfying enough on its own.

"And you," the horrific Healer reminded them of his presence, snapping them out of their adorable distraction. He opened up Coye's folder. It was much thicker than Byng's. "Varantule poisoning, one month ago. 15,000G. Seven broken ribs, a shattered right wrist, and a single black eye, one and a half months ago. 32,000G. Numerous other injuries, accidents, poisonings, and so on accrued over the last two years of your adventuring career ranging on average to two visits per month."

Suzette was horrified at this reminder of how dangerous Coye's job was. In contrast, Shayla was suddenly wondering where Coye found the gold to buy useless shit out of Dorothy's catalog when so much of his earnings apparently went towards keeping him alive. It was almost like the system was set up in a way that adventurers racked up more medical debt than they earned on the job. Scary, Shayla thought, but effective.

"But you?" Eschal pointed at Suzette. "I don't have records of anyone matching your description in my files. Elaborate on your presence."

"Oh, I'm no adventurer," Suzette left the idea off, showing that the creepy Healer didn't bother her in the slightest. She put her hand on Coye's shoulder. "I'm this boy's romantic partner, as is-"

"Me!" Byng crossed her arms and grumbled.

"I see," Eschal said as he suddenly looked at the huntress. "Congratulations, I'm happy things went well for you."

Byng was taken aback by his kindly statement. Despite appearances and the understated dryness of his dull voice, something about how he said it made his words feel sincere. She scratched the back of her head. Still too embarrassed to smile, all she could do was say, "Thanks. Your advice back then helped a lot, so, like... uh... yeah."

"I take it the deflowering was successful?" Eschal turned to face Coye. "I advised that the patient should seek a method to break her own hymen prior to intimacy, but the patient insisted it had to be done the traditional-"

"Can we fucking move on from this?!" Byng screamed from the back of her throat, bearing her sharp teeth like fangs.

Eschal stared for several moments until he realized how this topic might be embarrassing for the girl to talk about in front of others. Still, he looked back at Coye until the boy, in an uncharacteristically cheeky display, lifted up his hand, winked, and made the 'okay' symbol with his fingers when Byng was busy pulling at her hair.

Eschal nodded respectfully as he jotted down something in Byng's folder.

Suzette caught the moment and held back a laugh while Shayla was starting to believe that perhaps this horrifying parody of a physician wasn't so bad. At least he was funny, which is more than can be said about that Snyther guy.

"Why don't you go on and tell the man why we're here today, Darling?" Suzette suggested, trying to help Byng's embarrassment by moving along the conversation.

"Yeah, all right..." Coye sighed. Maybe it wasn't going to be as embarrassing as what Byng was just put through, but the last thing he wanted to do was explain to the creepy Healer in detail about the oddities of his sex life and then ask for an examination. There was the option to have Suzette explain them, but that would've been worse. He knew he had to do it himself.

"I'm here about-"

"Your addiction to Pixie dust?" Eschal asked, sucking all the air out of the room. No one said a word for what felt like ages. Everyone stared at the morose Healer- Coye most of all. Then, Eschal understood realized how that sounded. "To clarify, that wasn't a threat. Just an observation. An observation I now know is correct, judging by your stunned reaction. Perhaps we should move this to the examination room?"

Coye looked to Byng and Suzette, who were now visibly as nervous as he was. He could only imagine what Shayla looked like up in his hat. After struggling with the situation's reality, Coye weakly nodded his head. "Yeah, that sounds like a good idea..."

"Follow."