The Gamer Chapter 1322 – Campfire (Patreon)

The girls had settled in during the hours he had spent with Eliana. With Eliana, Aclysia, and Claire, to be more accurate, as the two maids had steadily brought him refreshments while they fixed up the house.

Scarlett had been holed up in the bus most of the time, doing her business work. Momo, similarly, had needed to return to the government for a quick meeting. In administrative time, two hours was quick. Those two mostly did the same as usual. Which was fine, as far as John was concerned. The teleporter was there so he could enjoy his vacation without interfering much with their business.

Lee and the elementals spent the majority of their day exploring the property through the Protected Space she put up. It was quite vast and the terrain untamed, so just walking around the edge of it took them several hours. Rave did a solo exploration, randomly penetrating inwards and looking for any interesting details. This kind of activity would keep several haremettes busy for a couple of days. Not more than that though. The property was vast as far as mundane property was concerned, yet even a vast property could be scanned pretty quickly. Humans were big creatures with long legs and good eyes.

Lorelei had prepared herself for the farm lifestyle in perhaps the most authentic way, buying a big basket of raw wool and entertaining herself by gradually transforming it into yarn, then clothing. Her reason for this was quite simple: since she wanted to be a seamstress, this was a good opportunity to understand the roots of it all. It would have been even better if they had animals to sheer. That did, like many other endeavours, expand past their given timeframe.

Nia was doing Nia things, looking for animals to befriend. That was, after she brought Velka over. The Magryph could toll around the property after the Protected Space was set up. John deemed it good for her to experience some genuine nature and he wanted to have her around for scratches.

Nathalia, Nightingale, and Metra preferred to stay on the Abyssal side. Entirely unsurprising, in the case of the two goddesses. Especially so for Nightingale, who loathed transforming her wings and claws. The three spent the majority of their first day just hanging out, making out, or napping. Beings beyond human still valued a stress-free environment to unwind.

In the evening, they all convened around a campfire. It was on the Abyssal side of the property, just so nobody needed to hide their various fantastical features. Even if trespassers were not a concern, satellite footage was. John did not mind too much if a secret service out there caught him in 4k, balls deep inside any of his haremettes. The horns and glowing eyes could attract unwanted attention though, mostly from Gaia.

Plus, it made the casual nudity even easier to justify.

Although they were on the Abyssal side, the firepit was entirely mundane. John had dug it out, gathered some dry wood, and put it all to the flame. “…Would you get mad if I had that made into a grill?” Salamander asked.

“Messes with the scenery a bit,” John complained.

“As much as Nathalia’s snooze tower?” The big breasted fire spirit pointed over her shoulder. A crude construct of overlapping obsidian shards rose twenty metres into the sky. Magma flowed within, glowing softly through the dark, volcanic glass. The menacing structure was hilariously out of place, thirty metres from a barn that may have been from the late 19th century. An endgame fortress asset plopped into the tutorial forest.

“Well, that’s hard to top,” the Gamer said. “Still, just the first day, please? The whole place will be unrecognizable soon enough.”

“Why do ya even want to grill?” Rave asked, demonstrably poking the contents of the wooden bowl in her hands: a nice rice dish with plenty of meat. “We ain’t starving over here.”

“I’m having the need to fucking burn something.”

“Uh! Uh! Burn me!” Sylph stated, dashing over the campfire. “Give me your best shot. Come one. I want it. I want it now!”

Salamander cackled and violently opened a raised fist. Fire and rock materialized above in a swirling mess, its destructive potential expanding along with its size with each passing moment. “If you insist!”

“No, not-“ Sylph zapped to the side, the meteor whistling past her, “-like that, Sally. Silly, silly Sally! I mean like burn me, verbally burn me.” In the distance, the meteor exploded against the other layer of the barrier. The campfire flickered from the shockwave. Even self-nerfed Eliana barely reacted to it. “Give me your best insult! Come on. You can do it, I am giving you permission to roast me.” She turned to the rest of the gathering. “Open invitation, come on!”

“Can someone…?” John requested, noticing embers rise where the remains of the meteor had fallen.

“I will tend to it,” Undine promised, a second body stepping out of the darkness outside the edge of the campfire. A third quickly followed, just to make certain there was no growing fire. The slime girl then turned to Sylph. “You’re loud.”

“Yes, loud, stupid, scarily cute, perverted, obnoxious, a blabbermouth, a sweet tooth, short, green, I know all of those, yes? Okay. We understand that? Nice, great, so how about you give me something creative. Come on, girls, and guy, roast me!” Sylph hovered horizontally above the campfire and slowly turned, like a kebab. Her hair formed a corkscrew shape around her.

The gathered harem retreated into thought. Removing all her most obvious weaknesses from the equation made it difficult to pin her with something. Metra was the one to raise her voice first. “If this was a horror story, you’d die second to last because the script demands the comedic relief stay as long as possible.”

“Ooooh, I like that, I like that!” Sylph whirled over to Metra. “Boop, your turn. We’ll roast you now.”

Metra sported a cocked grin. Green eyes wandered to the rest of the gathering, waiting for what they could produce. Apparently, they were doing this now. John found the idea rather interesting. They were always bantering, this was just one step up in wit. While everyone racked their brains to not go for the obvious jabs, the First of Wrath took the position in front of the campfire.

“You’re pretty!” Sylph declared.

“Did you already forget the rules of this game you started?” Nathalia wanted to know.

“Just needed to get that out there. She’s pretty. Audible gasp, you’re pretty too, Nathalia… pretty arrogant! HAH! Roasted.”

Metra whistled in a way that somehow grabbed the air spirit’s attention. “On your ass, airhead, you’re messing with the hazing.” Be it only in the interest of her entertainment, Sylph plopped down in Nathalia’s lap. It was her third favourite spot, after John’s and Salamander’s lap. The Gamer was quite certain that it was because, with her heat and massive tits, Nathalia was a lot like Salamander.

That she actually shut up and sat still was proof that even Sylph could learn.

“I-it’s…” Lee cleared her throat, all of the attention around the campfire suddenly zeroing in on her. “It’s really fortunate that you got a wolf tail, considering how much you like wagging it.”

That got some chuckles, but Metra did not seem impressed. “Good double-meaning, but I don’t feel the slightest bit insulted. Come on, girls, hurt me!”

“If you weren’t granted your powers, you’d be too much of an idiot to learn them,” Siena threw in.

“Meh and untrue.”

“Statement.” Everyone’s eyes immediately switched to Beatrice. There was a veritable tension in the air. The harem braced for impact. “You served a hundred rulers. You fought a thousand battles. You kept ten-thousands in line. You get stuck with the one man who does not want to be king. You clearly have complete control over your life.

“Fuck you, Beatrice,” Metra snapped at her. In a friendly way, mostly. “How about you cramp some intonation into your sentences so anyone can think that was fucking funny?”

“Did I hurt you?”

Metra let out the kind of frustrated, impotent noises Beatrice was an expert of extracting from people. “Yes,” she surrendered, annoyed. “Get here, you shocking bitch, your turn.”

Beatrice passively walked to the centre of the campfire. ‘Now that’s a tough nut to crack,’ the Gamer thought. ‘How to get under Bae’s skin…’

“Hey, uhm, Beatrice, can you look over here?” Gnome requested in her shy way. The passive maid turned – and started trembling. With magic, the crafty season elemental had created a stone tablet, on it was the simplified Fusion symbol. At least that was what a normal person would have seen at first glance.

John, almost as much of a perfectionist as Beatrice, immediately noticed what was off. The colours were wrong. Worse, the individual diamond shapes that contained the colours were off by such a slight margin that it was almost right, but not quite. The symmetry was entirely off.

Snickers started rising around the campfire as the passive maid gradually turned irate. The Gamer had been wrong, this was comically easy. Beatrice was annoyed from the first second, but tried to reign it in. Out of a sense of pride and for effect, John reckoned. In any case, she failed. Her left eyelid twitched. Electricity bounced between her horns. Finally, she snapped. The tablet was ripped from Gnome’s hands and slammed down on the ground. Beatrice turned it into tiny little chunks, grinding it down into pebbles. Then she ran off. She came back with a shovel and a handcart. Carefully, she scooped all the pebbles into the handcart, then popped out of the barrier.

Everyone was laughing. “W-what is she – hahaha – doing?” Lorelei asked, trying to keep control over herself.

“She’s piling it on the pebbles I need for the grounding of the concrete slab,” John explained, then snorted when Beatrice reappeared in the barrier. The passive maid sat down exactly where her fine butt had left an imprint in the grass earlier. Everyone got one last laugh at her expense. Then, Gnome had to get in the centre.

Beatrice held a grudge, that much was certain by her immediately saying, “You’re basic.”

“W-what?” Gnome stammered.

“Basic. Definition used in this case: a woman without outstanding or unique characteristics. Standard. Shy and feminine. You are basic.”

“I, uhm… I’m sorry?” Gnome pouted.

“Addendum: you do know how to punt annoyances though.”

“Thank you?”

“If you were more confused, you’d fit into a Pokémon game,” Lee threw in there. That got some chuckles out of the crowd. Eager to get out of the collective focus, Gnome walked over to the gamer girl and dragged her into the spotlight.

“If ya weren’t Magoi’s daughter, ya would have never met John and died with a horde of cats,” Rave immediately threw at Lee.

“Oof,” the gamer girl overacted and reached for her heart. “You got me, guess I can-“

“Nah, Jane, Lee is too lazy to keep cats. She would’ve gotten a bunch of Tamagotchi,” Salamander threw in.

Nia nodded. “Which she would have neglected as well.”

“Now that’s…” Lee pouted.

Scarlett raised her phone to her ear and made a couple of loud verbal noises. “I just got a call from current year. Says you violated the copyright for being a walking gamer girl stereotype.”

“I can’t help that I love pizza and video games!” Lee stomped adorably on the spot.

“Try not falling in love with guys ya know because of porn,” Rave added the coup-de-grace. “Did ya never listen when your dad taught you manners?”

“Oh, ha-ha, really rich coming from you!” Lee said, marching away, so Rave could take the spot.

Naked and unafraid, the feline Lightbearer raised her arms in a challenging gesture. “Come on, ya can try, but I know y’all love me too much to really hurt me.”

“No one needs to try and hurt you, Jane,” Aclysia raised her voice. “Anyone coming into your room would immediately identify that it takes one good pounding on your carpet and you would have friction burn.”

“Leave my fuzzy carpet out of this! It has done nothing but be nice and soft.”

“Yes, hello?” Scarlett acted like she was on her phone again. “Uh-huh… hm… Well, I will relay the message. Jane, I don’t hold copyright in the 80s, but they let me know you’re just another bright-haired girl with attitude.”

“Tell the 80s they can’t handle me, their techno was lame. Dubstep rules.”

“Just look at this woman,” John sighed theatrically, “accepted to be roasted, but can’t stop backtalking.” Rave opened her mouth to respond, then crossed her arms and just stood there. The Gamer rolled his neck and gave it his best shot. ‘Do I dare go there?’ he asked himself, then shrugged. ‘If not today, then when?’ “You know, every year you look a bit more like your mother.”

“Oh no, you did NOT!” Rave shouted and jumped at him. The two of them tumbled through the grass, vying for dominance. As much as John would have loved to be as superior right there as he had been with Eliana earlier, the reality of the Abyss was that Rave eventually ended up on top of him. “Ya wanna bang my mom, hm?!” she asked him, energetically.

“Luckily for us, you’ll stay young forever,” he responded.

“So my sister is on the menu?”

“She would be if I had met her earlier.”

Rave let loose a scandalized gasp. “Ya traitorous dick! Now I gotta mark my territory!” She pressed her lips on his. Tongues wrestled, a fight that John was certain he would win. They were in the middle of making out when John felt another pair of lips, not Rave’s lower ones, on his cock. A long tongue and venerating approach narrowed it down quickly. By the time she took him inside her mouth, John knew it was Nightingale.

The lewding of the cat girl and the harpy cascaded into the typical chain of eroticisms. Out under the open sky, in the twenty degree weather, they had a wonderfully free orgy. In the throes of ecstasy, they remodelled the landscape to create whatever surfaces or toys they needed. The two additional bodies that John had not used all day came out to play. Eventually, they all snoozed off where they were, naked and happy.

The roasting stopped there, perhaps to be picked up another time.