The Gamer Chapter 1664 – Best Man 4 – Random Encounters 2 (Patreon)

After that whole thing, John felt like discussing something less potentially precarious than sex relations. He left the chamber to find someone to talk to. Since they were now walking in less frequented corridors, he also put his arm around Aclysia’s waist.

John’s mind circled back to the brunette he had met earlier. She had been a comely young woman. Short, wide hips, averagely sized breasts, the whole package of things that John was immediately attracted to. Too bad that frilly skirt had hidden her ass and thighs. ‘That tailor deserves to be stabbed,’ he thought.

Aclysia tensed up.

“Anything wrong?” John asked.

“No, everything is alright,” the weaponized maid responded and chuckled.

“John Newman!” the two words pulled the Gamer’s attention to a woman that now approached the duo. She was middle aged in appearance. Wrinkles added a mature air to her face, as did the black hair that she had orderly wrapped up inside a mixture of bun and ponytail. “Exciting to run into you here.”

The Gamer had to scan his mental archives for a moment to find out who this woman was and why she was addressing him as if they knew each other. The answer to that was: they did. It was a very short previous meeting, but they did.

“Baroness Esmerelda von Abendsbach,“ he greeted her.

“Oh, how charming, you do remember me!”

“Two years are not enough to forget such a charming lady.” He was lying through his teeth. Esmerelda had been a thoroughly forgettable acquaintance. Back when John had worked for Lydia, back when he had been introduced to the Abyss as a fighter for her during the tournament that decided the fate of the German crown, he had been needled with questions by a whole crowd of nobles. Esmerelda had been part of that crowd. It was only thanks to his erudite mind being what it was that he could recall her whatsoever.

“Oh, stop it,” she said and waved off. “We’re not in actual court right now. You can admit to using memory magic.”

The Gamer weighed his options, then gave her a wry smile. “Of a sort, I suppose,” he said. Whatever raising Stats did to his body, exactly, it was definitely not natural. “If we’re being completely honest, why did you approach me as if I was supposed to remember you?”

“It makes for an easy conversation starter,” Esmerelda gestured in the direction both of them had been heading. “Interested in walking with me?”

“Platonically,” the Gamer said with a smirk. “I feel like I should state that, given my reputation.”

“My husbands won’t mind,” Esmeralda assured.

“Husbands, hm?” the Gamer asked. “Fascinatingly, I rarely come across male harems.”

“Two would not be enough to constitute a harem, I would say,” Esmerelda answered.

“Perhaps, perhaps not… no, likely not,” John decided. “A different question: anything you specifically hoped for when approaching me?”

“An interesting conversation, I suppose. It’s rare to find someone speaking for republican values in the Abyss. I do commend you for it, I should say. I hear you get a lot of pushback for the idea.”

“Domestic and abroad,” John confirmed. “Having any support voiced for it is rare.”

“I always found myself envious of the mundanes’ relative equality and the political structures that enabled.” Esmerelda let out a heavy sigh. “The gap between them is not so vast that it couldn’t be overcome by ganging up – well, it was that way. They are catching up to us supernatural folk remarkably fast. Makes you wonder if access to certain technologies will eventually cause as deep a rift in the mundane as it does in the Abyss.”

“Can a republic survive a class of gene-edited super-prodigies with brain implants… difficult question. What do you think, Aclysia?”

“Yes and no,” the weaponized maid gave her swift answer. “Republics, like all forms of government, always trend towards collapse, so this might be the kind of issue that will eventually lead to a republic being destroyed. It could also eventually lead to the rise of a republic, if enough people amass enough influence to demand the franchise and access to the technologies be broadened. Nothing lasts forever.” She wrapped both arms around his chest. “Except for our love, Master.”

“That, I swear,” John returned her attention with a little kiss.

“Ah, young love,” Esmerelda laughed.

They had a fairly dull conversation from there.

__________________________________________________________________________

“No,” John refused.

“Just one game,” Suel insisted, pointing at the chessboard.

Aclysia approached the annoying man. A sweet smile spread on her graceful features. “Please stay at least ten metres away from my Master for the rest of the festivities.”

“…I get the feeling I am not being given an option.”

“You are not.”

__________________________________________________________________________

John found himself standing amidst a circle of nobles, holding a remarkably normal conversation.

“Where did you vacation this year?” asked one lady.

“The French Mediterranean coast. I prefer to spend my autumns there. Much warmer,” answered an attending member of the Sons of Odin.

“Anything would be warmer than your home.”

Laughter.

“What about you, John? I hear you have taken a month off recently.”

“I spent it in the Oklahoman countryside, doing mundane things like farming.”

“Really? How was that?”

“A nice reminder of limitations. Enough about me, though. How are things up in Scandinavia?”

“Confusing, as always, although we much enjoy the peace of mind.”

“The defeat of the Blood has been a pleasant factor for all of us.”

“We don’t even have to worry about inviting advisors to the court anymore!”

“Annoyingly, the prices for golems have crashed.”

“You’re being dramatic, 20% is not that much.”

“20% was the majority of my golem smith’s profit margin.”

“You employ one yourself?”

“A creatively worded men-at-arms contract.”

“Oh, how interesting.”

John found it anything but interesting.

___________________________________________________________________________

“John! Save me!”

The cry reached the Gamer’s ear and he immediately sprinted towards its origin. Around one corner, he found Eliana curled up in a corner, Undine and Siena bowed over her. The two elementals were smirking sadistically.

“…Do I want to know what is going on here?” the Gamer asked.

“They just shoved me against the wall and won’t say fucking anything! They’re pulling a creepy mute Nia move!”

“Hello,” the pariah waved her hand, having suddenly manifested in the scene.

John scratched the back of his head. ‘Care to explain?’ the Gamer asked Undine mentally. Interference from Siena tried to prevent the slime lady from giving an answer.

‘We’re just bullying her,’ Undine answered.

Raising an eyebrow, John looked at the scene and the pretty little psycho that was screaming in confusion. She could break out of there at any time, the gap was big enough for her to just jump forward. Instead, she sat in the corner of the ornate room like a well-dressed rat cornered by two equally well-dressed cats.

It was kind of funny.

“Anyway, Nia, what have you been doing?” he turned to the pariah.

“Cock-provider, don’t you fucking dare ignore my plight!” Eliana shouted. “I’m being walled in by smug cunts and all you can do is waffle about with the human equivalent of an empty sheet of paper?!”

“Thank you,” Nia said.

“It wasn’t a fucking compliment!”

“It wasn’t?”

“No, why the fuck would that be a- Undine, get your chest bags out of my face, you oozing cumdump!”

“A blank page has sheer endless potential,” Nia explained her rationale, then adjusted her eyepatch. Everyone else in the room jumped at the short-lived exposure to the other side. “Sorry.”

“Help – me! Help! Me!” Eliana pleaded, Siena and Undine taking a half step forwards. “What is happening! I fucking hate this! AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! They’re cuddling me! I fucking hate cuddles!”

“I remember when that was true,” John mused and recalled the early days. Back when Eliana’s trauma had been such that she genuinely was uncomfortable when they were caressing her lovingly. Worse times. “Well, only one thing to do.”

“Oh, thank fuck, fina- No, don’t fucking join them!”

____________________________________________________________________________

John looked over his shoulder. He had the weird feeling that he was being watched. Courtesy of his additional senses, he knew that typically meant someone nearby was using some variant of second sight to scan his aura. It was quite obscure, yet constant. Weirder, he couldn’t make out the source. ‘Is there a whole lot of people doing it or is someone casting their net really wide?’

“Hi.”

The Gamer took a swift step backwards, nearly bumping into a servant. “So sorry,” he apologized, then turned to Alice. “Did you have to do that?”

The tanned, dark-haired woman regarded him with a gradually widening grin. Had it not been for their surroundings, John felt like she would have put Cheshire behind that expression. As it stood, she merely invoked the memory – which was enough to make John’s brain sing the song of the fire alarm.

BEEP!

The ceiling bird whistled in John’s head. ‘That’s a new one,’ he thought. ‘I preferred the headache when it comes to-‘

BEEP!

“-fucking hell, it’s like having thought hiccups.” He rubbed his temples. “Alice, seriously, why do you use your powers to torture me whenever we meet each other?”

“Because it is-“

BEEP!

“…Could you repeat that?” John requested. Simultaneously, he focused on the polished tip of his shoe. How did one cure thought hic-

BEEP!

“Entertaining. You’re like the human embodiment of low hanging fruit. It is so easy to tease you.”

“That’s a very interesting description.” The Gamer breathed methodically, forcing himself to relax deeply. “Did not expect you and Max to stick together, if I am being honest. When I saw you together after the Iron Domain, I considered that a fling.”

“As did I. It worked out for more. He is interesting.”

“More interesting than me?” the Gamer asked, then shook his head. “That was an improper question, forget I said that.”

“Yes. No.”

Confusion and poked pride mingled. “Which is to which?” he wanted to know.

“In order.”

John chewed the inside of his cheek. At least Alice’s presence was so alien that everyone else preferred not to listen to them. His irked sense of self-importance got the better of him. “What makes him more interesting than me?”

“You’re solved, if you understand?” He did not, so she continued, “In the strings of time that bind us, you are constant, you are here. All that is and all we know is contained on one thread from which we came and to which we go.”

BEEP!

‘FUCK!’ John bit back shouting to keep listening to Alice’s wonderland babble.

“While you, the Gamer, run and run, to shores unexplored or long forgotten, you expand your powers, destined to become a king unto yourself – no, not that kind of king. I mean, like, really, really powerful.”

“Your choices of words are giving me rhetorical whiplash.”

“Good.” Alice smiled. “You are strong and unrestrained. You got what you want, you want yet more, but you want nothing new or specific. Maximillian, he runs on the spot to stay in the same place, his realm one of struggle unending, fenced in by his inferior potential.” The Red Maiden tilted her head quizzically. “And is it not the restrictions that make an adventure worth embarking on? Also, he is better in bed.”

“I am sorry, what?” John asked.

“You heard me.”

“That’s mathematically impossible.”

“And yet I state it all the same.” Alice stepped away, leaving John very confused.

‘No, that’s… I suppose personal taste is a thing but… I mean, I shouldn’t be too annoyed he’s my friend and… no, I don’t need details, no, I don’t…’ “Alice,  get back here, I need-“ John’s eye twitched when he realized the pariah had whisked herself away. “…I hate when she does that.”

__________________________________________________________________________

“This is the worst!” Momo cried, flying into John’s chest. “Aaaaah-haaaaa!” She buried her face in his chest.

“There, there.” Running his hand over the silky top of her white hair, John mumbled soothingly. He had no idea what was happening, but so far this dinner had thrown weird surprise after weird surprise at him. Plus, he was still recovering from-

BEEP!

“Fuck!” the Gamer cussed out loud.

“Wha-?” Momo tilted her head back, until her chin rested on his collarbone. Her eyes were watery and she sniffed. “Don’t you want to care for me?”

“No – I mean yes, I mean… sorry, I have a brain hiccup… I’ll explain later.” John dragged the fairy towards an alcove. It looked like it had been part of the bedrock of the mountain the city had been built on top of and been integrated into the structure of the palace. The small cave made for a wonderful little retreat, padded as it was. This was especially true in the company of a crying Momo.

Usually, John would have been on the seek and destroy already, but these weren’t sad tears.

“What happened,” he asked calmly.

“I was talking to other chancellors and they were all like, ‘how do you do that?’ and, ‘I’ve been admiring your work!’ and kept showering me in compliments!” Momo sniffed and snuggled up to him. All of her usual resistance to hugs and kisses was melted away by her overloaded awkwardness. “Strangers! Complimenting me! Who does that?!”

“You’re just wonderful,” John whispered to her.

“Stoooooooooooooooooooooooop!” Momo wailed and wiggled herself deeper into the embrace. “I’ll cry!”

“You’re already crying.”

“I’ll cry more!”

“I’ll kiss all your tears away.”

“Ewwwwww,” Momo managed to sound like her usual self. “That’s way too corny!”

The fairy maid tried to get out suddenly, but John had her locked with arms and legs. “I’m not letting go,” he whispered to her. “You know why?”

“Because you’re an ass?”

“No, because you’re the most precious thing around.”

“Stop.”

“I love it when you get all self-conscious.”

“Cease.”

“Everyone should tell you that you’re brilliant.”

“No.”

“Because you are. You are my brilliant little fairy, my personal Tinkerbell, you make soar my heart and my life.”

“Halt.”

“I love you.”

Momo started pretty crying again. “Why do you do this to me?!” she whispered, beating his chest with small knocks. It was like a heart massage. “Jerk! Asshole! Perv!”

‘Fill me up on the brat energy,’ the Gamer thought, then kissed her.

The woman practically melted in his embrace.