Just Another Day (Patreon)

No one dared move. Many of them had even stopped breathing. They stared ahead, their hands on their weapons. Swords, bows, spears. None of it would matter, and they knew it. They knew what they were up against. They had heard the rumors, seen the pictures. It was unmistakably her.

“Form up!”  A voice called, breaking everyone from their stupor. Quickly, but reluctantly the soldiers formed themselves into a half-circle around the creature. Eight men, well-trained. Their rugged appearances, their stances, the precision with which they moved, it spoke volumes. And yet…

The creature they had partially surrounded hadn’t moved an inch. No taller than a child, it stood confident. Legs together, it’s over-sized forearms arms folded in front it, it’s head cocked to the side, and the smile...A wide, unnatural grin was plastered across its face. It’s weapon, a massive butcher knife, was planted into the ground, next to it.

“Jeez,” the creature sighed in a voice distinctly feminine. High pitched, fitting of her size, but articulate. At least, for a monster. “Took you guys long enough. I love suspense as much as the next gal, but that was just ridiculous.” The creature unfolded her arms. Long as they were, and short as she was, the massive appendages almost reached the ground. “So ya’ll gonna attack, or…”

No movement.

The soldiers, most of them anyway, remained steadfast, their weapons ready, but none dared attack. Their eyes forward, none of them noticed that one of their numbers had taken a step back. The smallest step, imperceptible to all, except the creature...Immediately her eyes widened and darted to the man. He jumped, but otherwise held his ground.

He was lightly armored. His front protected with thick leather and hide armor. His helmet, while it provided sufficient protection for his head, left his face mostly exposed. A young man, barely into his 20s from the looks of him.

Fear gripped him as he locked eyes with the monster. He didn’t think it was possible, but her smile grew even wider, exposing the rows of pointed teeth in her mouth. “Ooooo…” she mused to herself as she walked toward him.

The soldiers’ formation followed the creature as she moved, all except the young man who stood frozen in place. She stopped just feet from him, her gaze fixated on his face. She cocked her head side to side as if looking for something. “Look at you...‘Shaking in your boots,’ isn’t supposed to be literal you know. I guess I can’t blame you though, but don’t worry, Cutie. I won’t lay a hand on you. Promise. Wanna know why?”

The creature stepped even closer, tilting its head backwards to look up at the man.

“When I’m done with your friends, you and me,” she whispered. “We’re gonna have some fun.” She paused for a time, her eyes ever-widening as she watched the man squirm. Suddenly she opened her mouth, as wide as she could, flashing her knife-like teeth at the poor man. She reached for him, her hands formed into giant, sharp claws hovering inches on either side of the man’s head. She laughed at him, her tongue, like an elongated pink tentacle flailing in his face, causing the boy to drop his weapon, turn, and cover himself with both arms.

Her laugh was cut short when a spear was thrust at her head. Expertly she jumped backwards, performing an elegant twirl in the air before landing back near her weapon. With a satisfied grin, she eyed the man who had attacked her. The man stepped in front of the scared soldier. He leveled his spear against the monster, and the rest of his squad shifted inwards to complete the half-circle formation once again.

“It’s okay, lad.” The man said as he shifted forward. “This is a fight few are prepared for.” Fully armored, this one struck the creature as the leader of some kind. Not that it would matter in a moment.

“It’s about time,” the creature said as she hefted her weapon on to her shoulder. “Go and hide, cutie. You’re not gonna want to see what I do to your friends.”

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Figured this pic needed a remake. Just a normal day for Dot. At least a few hundred years ago. The moral of the story is if you piss your pants a little bit, you just might live. The last one always gets to live.